The Reality of Wright and Wrong

by Leddy Harper

  His dominance did crazy things to me.

  When he faced me again, his smile back in place, he said, “Hey, babe. What brings you here?”

  That made me laugh. Full-belly laugh. He’d just gotten done lecturing one of the crew members about how we weren’t actors, yet here he was, acting as if he had no idea why I was there. When in reality, this had been planned since before coming home from Ohio.

  I couldn’t let him walk away from his contract with the show. It was the last season, so he only needed to get through the next five weeks of filming, and it’d all be over. We compromised by taking matters into our own hands. If they wanted to talk about us, we’d write the script. Share our story the way we wanted it to be told. Which led me in front of the cameras for the first time.

  “I was in town getting my classroom set up, so I thought I’d come by on my way home to see you.”

  I’d reluctantly allowed him to try to make things right with the school, and to my surprise, he did. Granted, it had taken a very generous donation on his part to get my job back—which, had I known ahead of time, I wouldn’t have let happen. In the end, I couldn’t argue. Brogan wasn’t the type of man to let things go—especially when it involved me.

  “Well, I’m glad you did. I missed you.”

  I reached over the desk and held his face, pulling him closer to me. Against his lips, I whispered, “I love you, Brogan.”

  He hummed and said, “I fucking love you, Mercy.”

  Epilogue

  Mercy

  “Hurry up…you’re making me miss the season premiere of the show.” Stella huffed from behind me, though she hadn’t hidden her teasing tone very well.

  I turned to the side and glanced at her through the mirror. It took insurmountable strength to keep the smile off my face while I watched her dramatically slouch on the sofa in her dress like a drunken slob on prom night. Ever since Brogan and I had announced the date for our “wedding,” she complained about having to miss the first episode of Wrong Inc’s final season. Which was a ridiculous thing to bitch about, considering she could record it and watch it when she got home.

  To be fair…we’d picked this date on purpose.

  I liked the idea of our friends and family being with us rather than watching us.

  “I mean,” she continued to whine, “it’s not like it’s a real wedding. You guys are already married—and have been for six months. This is nothing more than a party. You could’ve had a party anytime. Doing so on the night the first episode airs is just a bitch move.”

  Stella was lucky I hadn’t taken any of this seriously.

  “Keep it up, and I’ll have a party every evening the show comes on. And I’ll make you attend.” I eyed her through the mirror before returning to my mom so she could finish fixing my hair—there was nothing wrong with it, but she couldn’t seem to stop fawning over me. It was a special day, and we had come so far since they had learned of my relationship with Brogan, so I gave it to her.

  “It just needs a little more spray. Hold on.”

  “It’s fine, Mom. I’m pretty sure the eighty-four thousand pins you added will keep it all in place until our tenth anniversary.”

  She rolled her eyes and smacked her lips. “Just a little more,” she said while heading to the corner of the room for her giant bag of preparation items. Honestly, it was something a doomsday prepper would envy.

  “I heard a little rumor.” Stella’s singsong voice caught my attention, forcing me to turn and actually look at her. “Is it true that Indi’s getting her own show?”

  I shrugged, not caring to discuss our friend behind her back. “You talk to her more than I do…shouldn’t you know?”

  Stella had moved to town a little over a month ago, and since then, she’d grown close with Indi—as well as everyone else at Brogan’s shop. She’d made herself at home in our circle, as if she’d been there forever, and I couldn’t have been happier.

  She didn’t seem pleased with my response, which was evident in her crossed arms and even more slouched posture. “Well, I know the producers approached her with the idea not too long ago, but she won’t tell me if she’s agreed to it or not. And since she works for Wrong, and you sleep with Wrong, I figured you’d have all the details.”

  Just then, Indi slipped into the room, closing the door behind her with her foot. I pointed to her while keeping my eyes on Stella and said, “Here she is. Ask her yourself.”

  Stella waved me off. “Already tried that. She won’t give anything up.”

  “Has anyone ever told you that you’re relentless?” Indi asked with a swift roll of her chocolate-brown eyes. Then she handed Stella a covered plate. “There. Eat your brownies and be quiet.”

  Stella lifted the edge of the cling wrap and smiled. “I see right through you, Indi. This is a bribe. But it’s a good thing I like your kind of bribery.”

  With an easy laugh, Indi made her way across the room to where I stood in front of the mirrored vanity. She held out an envelope, her cheeks glowing red with unspoken secrets. I wasn’t sure which secret had caused the blush—the one about her getting her own show, or whatever she had to give me.

  “Wrong wanted you to have this before the party got started.” Well, that answered one question. However, it created another one.

  Considering nothing about Brogan and me had been conventional since the day we met, we figured it would be pointless to start now. It was one of the reasons we’d opted out of the actual wedding and only planned a reception. There were lots of things about a ceremony that we would’ve wanted, but after sitting down and talking through it all, we decided that the tradition of it wasn’t that important or worth the extra cost. So, we had agreed to take the money we would’ve spent and donate it to his charity to help feed the less fortunate—The Heart of Joe Foundation, named after the homeless man who had caused Brogan to speak to me that night outside Rulebreakers.

  However, the one tradition Brogan refused to give up was not seeing me before the party. I might not have been walking down an aisle to him, but that didn’t stop him from wanting to experience the feeling of seeing me for the first time right before we went hand-in-hand into the dining hall.

  Which had left Indi to be the go-between all afternoon.

  “What’s this?” I asked, taking the envelope from her.

  The hopeless-romantic part of her that she desperately fought to keep hidden came to the surface, brightening her face and dancing on her lips. There was a moment in time I’d assumed this was caused by jealousy, though I’d come to learn it wasn’t. Envy, maybe. She’d admitted that a part of her yearned to find what I had with Brogan, yet she knew too well what it was like to lose it unexpectedly, which had kept her from searching for it. That killed me—knowing she purposely denied herself this kind of happiness. Indi was truly an amazing person, and she deserved so much better than being alone.

  But that was something she’d have to come to on her own.

  “I don’t know what it says,” she whispered through the emotion clogging her throat. “I haven’t read it, no matter how badly I wanted to peek inside. But if I had to guess, I’d say it’s probably his vows.”

  That surprised me, as we had decided against vows—not because they meant nothing to us, but simply because we weren’t having an actual wedding. When the topic had come up, we’d decided to share and honor our vows in private, on a daily basis, and make that part of our life together. We had agreed that voicing our promises in front of others would simply be for show, that it would mean more if they were spoken inside of an embrace or over dinner or after a fight. We didn’t need to make declarations in front of anyone else—only to each other.

  Unsure of what to expect, I glanced down at the envelope in my trembling hand.

  I lifted the flap and pulled out a yellowed piece of paper. The edges appeared to have been charred, making it look like an old letter. Carefully penned words decorated the front in black script, leaving behind a mental image of a feath
er in an inkwell. The lines of some letters had seeped into the fibers of the cardstock, adding to the overall presentation.

  My eyes brimmed with tears before I finished reading the first line.

  Stood now at the helm of a beautiful ship am I,

  Another by my side as we plot our course, we sail,

  From deepest ocean to deepest ocean,

  On winds of joy and hope,

  Her soul, my sanctuary

  And I finally know why they called her mercy.

  With the note still in my hand, I ran out of the room, leaving Indi, Stella, and my mother behind. They yelled for me to come back, asking what was wrong. I ignored their pleas. Disregarded their cries. I couldn’t remain in that room for one more minute. One more second.

  Barefoot and blinded by tears, I fled. The harsh beats of my heart and hollow thuds of my feet pounding the carpeted floor harmonized in my ears, the rapidly increasing tempo propelling me forward until I reached the end of the hallway.

  The drums that had resounded around me slowed along with my pace, until the only rhythm that remained was the one my heart created. It was strong and steady. Confident yet impatient. Each eager beat pumped to the cadence of excitement and longing and anticipation.

  I stilled and wiped my eyes, not caring about my makeup. I didn’t give two shits if I had mascara all over my cheeks in place of blush, or if my eyeliner looked like it’d been drawn on by a blind and drunk squirrel after smoking pot. I only cared about what was on the other side of the closed door.

  In the blink of an eye, I was in the room, the door now at my back. I didn’t remember opening it or stepping inside or even shutting it behind me. I’d taken a deep breath to calm myself, and before I knew it, my breath blew past my lips as I stood there, staring into the frightened eyes of the man I loved.

  “What happened, Mercy?” Panic filled his voice as he rushed to me, and then it ran through him as he held my face in his hands. “Fuck, babe…talk to me. Are you okay?”

  I curled my fingers around his wrist to keep his warmth against my cheek, and then lifted my other hand, which still held his note, to his chest. When I ran out of my dressing room, I had no clue what I wanted to say to him. But now that I was here, I realized it didn’t matter. I didn’t need a prepared speech to tell the man I loved how I felt. And without a second thought, I spoke the words that were in my heart.

  “I love you, Brogan.”

  “I love you, too.”

  I shook my head, silencing his interruption. “I need to get this out, so please just listen until I’ve said everything I need to. Okay?” I waited for his hesitant nod before continuing. “From the moment we first met, I knew there was something different about you. Something special. And when I ignored everything else, it was easy to accept that. It was easy to see that you came into my life for a reason—and not a temporary one.”

  Brogan’s brows pinched together, worry furrowing along his forehead.

  Needing to reassure him, I squeezed his wrist and carried on. “I’m so sorry for allowing everything to become so loud in my head. For allowing it to create doubt. For running when I should’ve remained steady. Looking back, I realize I should’ve trusted you. I should’ve trusted us. Because my faith in what we have together has always been there. What you mean to me has always been there. My soul has known all along. So this is my vow. My promise to you. I’ll never allow anything to come between us. Ever. I’ll never run again, never give you a reason to chase me again. This is where I belong—where I want to be. Right next to you for the rest of this life and any other we have after this.”

  “Oh, babe…” He ran the pad of his thumb beneath my eye, clearing away the evidence of my tears. “That’s what you ran in here for? Is that why you’re crying? Do you think I question your love for me or expect you to run again?”

  “No. I just needed to say that.” I held the notecard between us and added, “We said no vows, but then you gave me this, and I realized how badly I wanted to share mine with you. No… It wasn’t a want but a need. I needed to make that promise today. On our wedding day, before we allowed the rest of the world in.”

  “Mercy…you didn’t need to rush over here to tell me all that. I already knew. But thank you. Hearing you say it means the world to me, even if I never doubted it. I love you so much. Everything we’ve been through has gotten us here, and no matter how painful it was at times, I wouldn’t change a second of it. You’re worth it all, Mercy Daniels.”

  He was right. We’d known each other for six days before getting married. It was just shy of eight weeks from the night we met until the night he’d shown up in Ohio to take me home for good. And in total, we’d only been together for six months. No one in their right mind would be as confident in a relationship in such a short amount of time. Yet we were. And we couldn’t have possibly felt this way without all the obstacles we’d had to face.

  Jordan had been the biggest problem by far. However, his persistence and interference and the doubt he’d caused had only strengthened what I felt for Brogan. It pushed and tested me, making me understand things that would’ve taken others ten times as long to comprehend. I hadn’t been given the opportunity to ease into my feelings for Brogan. They smacked me in the face, stopped me dead in my tracks. And no matter how hard I’d fought against them, they won.

  Each and every time.

  Our connection was relentless from the start. It didn’t matter how many times I’d questioned where Brogan had come from that night, how he’d ended up on that sidewalk or why I’d gone home with him, because the answer wasn’t important. Regardless of what reason either of us could come up with, it would never make sense.

  Because fate doesn’t make sense.

  I questioned it, analyzed it, picked it apart and tried to understand the reasons for things, but I never found what I was looking for. Instead, I simply had to trust it. Believe in it. Follow my heart and listen to my soul. I realized now that I only had to pay attention to the signs; they were my only guide in this life. I couldn’t wait for someone to tell me what to do—the breeze won’t whisper advice in your ear. And I learned that I shouldn’t assume a roadblock means the end of the road. It might be there to detour me. It also might be there to test me. The only way to know for sure is to tackle it head-on. But the biggest lesson I’d learned through this whole thing was:

  Nothing in life comes easy.

  If you want something, fight for it.

  Make it happen.

  And then never stop.

  The universe may have a sick sense of humor, but if you play along, it’ll leave you with a burning smile on your face and a soul full of happiness.

  Mercy

  Tied to the mast of a drifting ship was I,

  My wheel lost, years before in a tempest of my own design.

  Tossed was I from shallow bay to shallow bay by the silent storm of solitude,

  Sanctuary escaped me.

  To the heavens, I cried for mercy.

  When dawn broke on new life's day I saw her then,

  Perfect yet damaged, whole yet...missing,

  A puzzle yearning to be solved,

  Her pieces scattered, lost?

  The only clue, a vision on my soul.

  And her name was Mercy.

  In rolled a cotton fog of lavender that filled my senses and loosened my bonds,

  As the mist caressed paint scarred flesh,

  it crackled with the chilled heat of passion rekindled.

  The first time I tasted Mercy

  "Save me and have me, fix me and I’m yours"

  With her words burning in my mind I tried,

  I took from me, gave to her and left myself a broken shell.

  I stripped all I could spare and more besides

  As I emptied myself into Mercy

  Intensity builds,

  The rolling thunder of ecstasy,

  The pulsing cadence of fury,

  The aching heartbeat of desire,

  T
he roaring beat of lust,

  Twisting, writhing in the lovers’ dance

  As I bared my all to Mercy

  Two broken parts of the same,

  Two fragmented halves,

  Can love grow in the fractures of souls?

  Can devotion consummate the shattered hearts?

  Can tenderness bind the two to one?

  Can I become we?

  Can we become mercy?

  Stood now at the helm of a beautiful ship am I,

  Another by my side as we plot our course, we sail,

  From deepest ocean to deepest ocean,

  On winds of joy and hope.

  Her soul, my sanctuary

  And I finally know why they called her mercy.

  —Kev Murtagh

  Painite

  Shine a light on you, and you flash like fire. Red and warm. Bright. Dangerous, yet unmistakably safe.

  Set you down, and you go unnoticed. Lost in the rocks with your rough, unrefined edges. Just another piece of earth along the way.

  You are rare, Painite. Some say the rarest. But there are those who don’t see it. They don’t know it...your worth. Your value.

  You were passed around like show and tell. Women taking their turns with you. Trying you on. Wearing you for a moment—just a brief moment—before it was someone else’s turn.

  Then she found you.

  She saw something in you. Valued and cherished you. Polished you and wore you with pride. She made you feel as rare as you are, Painite. Until one day, you were just another gemstone.