Little Bird

by Honey Palomino

  “Weird,” Mike said, dipping a chip in queso and stuffing it into his mouth. Gigi’s ears perked up and she looked at me anxiously. “Where did you say you moved from again?”

  “Scottsdale,” I replied, a little too quickly.

  “You’re a little pale to be from Arizona,” Charlotte laughed.

  “Yeah,” I shrugged. “Guess I’m not into the sun either. Skin cancer sucks, you know.”

  She nodded and smiled and I tried to keep the bile from rising in my throat.

  “My cousin lives in Phoenix and no matter what she does to keep away from the sun, she’s still brown as an old piece of leather,” Emma said.

  I nodded, “Yeah, it’s a challenge.”

  The table fell awkwardly quiet and I grabbed my drink, downing it quickly.

  “Anyone else want another?” I said, standing up quickly. “I’ll buy.”

  “Sure,” they all three said in unison.

  “Got it,” I said, turning to Mike. “Can you make sure Gigi doesn’t steal anyone’s tacos?”

  “Of course,” he laughed, kissing Gigi’s forehead. She’d been lapping up the attention like a queen the whole time. She’d be fine without me.

  “I’ll be right back,” I said, thankful for the break from the questions. I knew in time I’d be more comfortable answering questions about my fake past but today was just not the day. My hands were trembling as I stood at the bar and ordered our drinks. As the bartender mixed them, I took a moment to look around at the pub.

  It was dark and woodsy inside, a stark contrast to the sunny open area outside. The wood paneled walls were lined with old neon beer signs and concert posters. The smell of stale beer permeated the place and it felt good to be somewhere that wasn’t all glitz and glam.

  When I’d first met Nate, I’d been so impressed by all of that, thinking that I’d felt alive for the first time. But I’d been so wrong.

  This was life.

  This was authentic.

  People being themselves, having nachos and beer without putting on any airs, or worrying if their shoes were made by the right designer, or if the lighting made their nose look shiny.

  I’d gone through so much. It felt so good to be on the other side of it all, knowing what I know now. I mean, I’d definitely not do it again if given the option, but it was good to have the lessons. I could do without the trauma and PTSD that Nate gifted me, though.

  I smiled gratefully at the bartender as he put the drinks in front of me and slipped him an extra twenty as a tip. There was a little money left over from the money I’d taken from Nate’s safe and each time I spread it around a little, I felt a little less guilty.

  I’d never stolen a thing in my life.

  And yet, now, I’d taken more than I’d ever earned from Nate’s safe to escape him.

  And that, I’d do again in a heartbeat.

  I carried the drinks out to the table and almost dropped them when I saw the scene in front of me. All three of them were taking pictures of Gigi, putting the little umbrella sticks from their drinks in her hair and laughing as they snapped photo after photo.

  “Whoa, what are you doing?” I asked, putting the drinks down.

  “She’s a perfect model,” Emma said, laughing.

  I stood in front of Gigi, and they pointed their cameras up at my face.

  “No!” I shouted, way too loudly, throwing my hand up.

  One by one, they lowered their phones, each of them looking at me curiously.

  I sat down, my face flushed, my heart racing.

  “Alright, shit, spill it girl,” Charlotte finally said after a moment.

  “What?” I asked.

  “I know that look,” she said, raising a brow at me. “We’re nurses, remember?”

  “I don’t know what —.”

  “— Samantha!” Emma said. “Nobody is as jumpy as you are about having their picture taken without a reason. And you don’t have social media? And you’re from Scottsdale, but you don’t have a tan? C’mon.”

  They looked at me expectantly and I swallowed hard, wishing the Earth would just swallow me up right there. I met their probing gazes, one by one, then looked down at Gigi.

  It was too risky.

  Nate wasn’t just some regular guy. I couldn’t tell them the truth.

  At least not all of it.

  “I don’t really want to talk about it,” I finally said, hoping like hell they’d leave it at that.

  Emma opened her mouth to protest, but Charlotte shot her a look.

  “Okay,” she shrugged. “We’re here for you if you need us.”

  “Thank you,” I said, my shoulders relaxing. The truth was I wanted to tell them everything, my soul longed to let the words spill out, to release that pent up energy of holding all the trauma of this horrible story inside.

  But that was too dangerous.

  And if I forgot, even for one second, just how dangerous it was, Gigi and I would both be dead, which was proving to be a good thing, because even if I tried, I’d never forget what led up to me finally leaving…

  Still sleeping, Nate wrapped his arms around me as the sunlight shone through his bedroom windows, baking my skin with the early morning Los Angeles sunshine. I could feel his erection against my back and I knew he’d be waking up in a few minutes.

  He’d grown very predictable.

  I knew that he’d wake up without opening his eyes. His fingers would press into my breasts, and then his hips would press into my ass as he grew harder. Without a word, he’d slide into me, eventually moving on top of my back and pumping into me until he came. Then, he’d silently pull out and crawl out of bed, go to the bathroom and shower and head to the kitchen to make himself breakfast.

  Never a kiss. Never a good-morning uttered. Hell, he didn’t even make enough bacon for me and Gigi.

  Even if I tried to flip the script, my kisses and words were ignored, as he insisted he didn’t like to talk before his coffee. Fucking me wordlessly was just fine with him, though, despite my protests.

  Nate took things the way he wanted them and that was that. There was no negotiation, I’d learned.

  I’d learned the hard way, that is.

  I knew he was quick to anger in the morning — well, all the time, really, but he seemed a little more on edge in the mornings. Probably because he hadn’t had anything to drink yet, considering his coffee always came with a splash of whiskey.

  Most days, I humored him. I went along with his demands, altering my behavior to keep his demons at bay.

  Today, though, I needed a break. I was about to start my period and sex was the last thing I wanted this morning, even if it was in his clinical and silent way.

  I untangled myself from him and pulled on my robe, slipping silently from the room. The kitchen was just as bright as the rest of the house, sunlight barreling in from every corner.

  I was making breakfast when I heard Nate’s phone ping from the counter where it had been charging overnight. I looked over at it and saw it light up with a message. Curiosity got the best of me, and I walked over and looked down to read it while it was still on the screen.

  My heart dropped when I saw the name —‘Crystalia’.

  Crystalia Allegra was not only the newest sweetheart of Hollywood but also happened to be Nate’s ex-girlfriend. One of the many, that is. She was also the kind of hot that should be absolutely outlawed.

  Her message was short but devastating.

  “See you tonight, sexxxy.”

  And then, just like that, it disappeared and his screen locked itself back.

  I stood frozen in the kitchen, the spatula in my hands trembling as the eggs burned on the stove behind me.

  Chapter 21

  SAMANTHA

  Walking through the hospital always made me feel proud of myself.

  I felt at home.

  The smells brought me peace like comfort foods — chicken fried steak and mashed potatoes. Bleach, disinfectant, rubber and fresh linens, nothing ma
de me feel as good as being at a hospital.

  Weird, I know.

  Most people hate hospitals.

  I saw them as a place of healing and miracles — performed by scientist’s hard work and ingenuity and brilliance, of course.

  But, just as much, I found them filled with the best parts of humanity. I’d wanted to be a nurse since I was a little kid and I’d go to work with my mom every now and then. She kept me shielded from the hard parts, and now that I was a nurse myself, I was thankful for that. But it only made me respect her more, to know what she was keeping to herself all those years.

  The truth is, being a nurse is hard as hell, in more ways than one. But it is so worth it.

  Tonight, my shift was about to end, but I was making a quick run over to Northwestern to drop off some patient files for one of my doctors, and that pride I normally felt was on ten walking through those hallowed halls.

  When Rocco told me I could still be a nurse, I was ecstatic, but I wasn’t hoping for much. I figured I’d have to be hidden away in some dingy little small town hospital and find a way to like it. But I’d been so wrong. Instead, he’d managed to place me at one of the best hospitals in the world.

  I felt blessed.

  And so far, even with Nate’s bounty on my head, no one seemed to bat an eye in recognition. My new look was working, thankfully.

  I dropped off the records and turned around, retracing my steps back to the children’s hospital. I’d just walked onto the elevator and turned around to select my floor when a man walked on behind me.

  The doors closed, leaving us in the elevator alone. I glanced over at him and nodded politely when I saw that it was the doctor my friends had talked about at the bar the other day — McDreamy, they’d called him.

  He looked at me curiously, then cocked his head.

  “You look familiar,” he said. My heart sank. He didn’t look like the type to watch Ellen. Wasn’t he too busy for that?

  I shrugged in reply, unsure how to answer, then it hit me. “I get that often. I must have one of those faces.”

  He kept looking at me, leaving me unnerved.

  “No,” he said, shaking his head. Then, as if a light went off, he snapped his fingers. “Oh, right!”

  Oh god, oh god, oh god, I prayed, don’t say it…

  “Oh! The steakhouse! I saw you at the bar! With the other nurses, was it last week?”

  “Oh, right,” I agreed, my heart skipping a beat. I tried to force air into my lungs and a smile on my face all at the same time. “That’s right.”

  “I haven’t seen you around before, are you new?”

  “Um, yeah,” I shrugged. “I work in Peds.”

  He nodded and smiled, putting a hand out to me. “Dane Fazio.”

  I looked down at his hand and grabbed it, shaking it quickly and ignoring the electricity shooting up my wrist. “Samantha Brown. Nice to meet you, Doctor.”

  “Oh, please call me Dane,” he said, smiling. His teeth were white and large, with one on the bottom overlapping another, and I couldn’t help but think how charming it was that he hadn’t had it fixed. It would have been an easy thing to do, but instead, he’d kept the personality. I liked it.

  I realized I was staring at his lips and shot my eyes back up to his.

  The light overhead blinked and the elevator lurched to a stop.

  We both looked at the doors, waiting for them to open, but they didn’t. I looked up at the lights to see what floor we were on and saw two red X’s blinking.

  “Oh, this isn’t good,” I said, panic filling my veins.

  “Not again,” Dane groaned.

  “Again?” I asked. “This happens often?”

  “Occasionally,” he said, pulling open a metal panel under the elevator buttons and pressing a big red button with a telephone receiver on it. Immediately, a loud ‘ding’ sounded overhead, followed by a woman’s voice.

  “Hello?” she called. “Do you need assistance?”

  “Yes,” Dane called out loudly, his head thrown back. “The elevator’s stuck between floors six and seven. Bank 6A.”

  “I see that, I apologize for the inconvenience. It should be fixed shortly. Please stay calm.”

  Another loud ding sounded and Dane looked back at me with a sheepish smile.

  “Looks like we have nothing to do but wait.”

  “Right,” I said, leaning back against the wall. “How long does this usually take?”

  “Half an hour? Maybe more?”

  “Wow, really?”

  He shrugged. “You never really know.”

  “Are you always this easygoing about getting stuck in elevators?” I asked.

  “I like to just go with the flow,” he winked. Holy cow, he was handsome. No wonder the other nurses were drooling over him. “How about you?”

  “What?”

  “You like to go with the flow?”

  I laughed, considering his question. “I guess I used to. Not so much these days.”

  “Ahh, one of those.”

  “One of what?” I laughed.

  “You’ve been burned.”

  “Sure, who hasn’t? Hot coffee, pulling pans out of the oven, a little sunburn…” I teased.

  He laughed and nodded.

  “Okay, okay,” he said. “I’ll give you that. But remember, it’s always good to live in the moment.”

  “Is that what we’re doing now?”

  “Do we have a choice?”

  “I guess you’ve got a point there,” I said. I hadn’t smiled this much since…well, I couldn’t remember. But he had me smiling so much my cheeks hurt and damn, it felt good.

  “So, where are you from, Samantha?”

  “Scottsdale,” I said, a pang of guilt running through my heart at lying to him. Somehow it was a little easier with my friends, even if they had questioned it and my pale skin. “You?”

  “Born and raised here in The Windy City,” he said. “South side.”

  I nodded and smiled, unsure what else to say.

  “So, I take it you went to Northwestern for med school.”

  “Yep,” he replied. “Only place I’ve worked since then.”

  “Oh, that’s right, you’re the head of Endocrinology, is that right?”

  He raised a brow and I realized I was busted.

  “How did you know that?”

  “Um…,” I hesitated, then laughed. “My friends told me the other day. Apparently, you have quite the reputation.”

  “Oh, do I?” He laughed, his loud laughter booming through the elevator. “Please enlighten me.”

  “Okay,” I shrugged, going with it. “According to trusted sources, all you do is work.”

  His soft brown eyes flashed with darkness for a second before he shook his head.

  “That’s it?”

  “That’s all I’ve got, sorry,” I said, throwing up my hands. “Oh, wait, there’s one more thing!”

  “Spill it!”

  “Your nickname is apparently McDreamy.”

  “McDreamy, seriously?” He wrinkled his nose. “That’s so unoriginal.”

  “I didn’t make it up,” I replied.

  “Damn,” he said. “I may need to work on that. Start some fake rumor and give myself a better name. Something like…” He stopped, squinting his eyes as he contemplated a name for himself.

  “…The Kidney King.”

  “Ugh, that’s awful,” I said, shaking my head and laughing hard.

  “Yeah, you’re right,” he agreed. “It needs work.”

  “I have complete faith in you,” I said, smiling back at him, my heart feeling lighter than it had felt in a lifetime.

  Chapter 22

  DANE

  The greenest grass on a summer day, bathed in warm rays of sun.

  That’s what her eyes looked like.

  They shimmered with life, flashing little jolts of electricity right through my heart, pumping it back to life with each ripple of laughter that passed over her ruby lips.


  Old me would have used this moment to really get to know her, if you know what I mean. Quickies in dangerous places were my thing back then.

  New me, however, was curious about her in an entirely different way than that.

  Don’t get me wrong, she was drop dead gorgeous and the thought of what was hiding under those scrubs was definitely in the back of my mind.

  But there was something about the story in her eyes that made me want to know more. It was like she only allowed little pieces of herself to come out at a time, instead of barreling over me with her entire personality at once, like most people do.

  No, I could see there were many layers to Ms. Samantha Brown. The thought of peeling them back was arousing to me in the most fascinating way.

  To be honest, I’d been thinking about her since I saw her at the bar. Way too much, probably. But I’d convinced myself it wasn’t her, particularly, that had my interest peaked. It was just the feelings she invoked in me that I thought were long dead. It was the possibility of them finally coming back that had me thinking back on the vision of her sitting at that bar.

  But now that she was standing in front of me, bathed in the harsh florescent light of the elevator, and laughing like a delighted child — I knew it was her, after all.

  She was small and petite and elf-like, but not frail in the least. She looked strong and healthy and like she’d survived some things, but was better for it.

  I knew I needed to get to know her better.

  Apparently, fate agreed, because here we were stuck in a damned elevator together and if that wasn’t something written in a cheesy romance novel somewhere, I didn’t know what was.

  She leaned up against the wall, a bemused grin on her face.

  “How would you like to prove your friends wrong?” I asked.

  “How so?” she asked, cocking her head to the side.

  “Go out with me,” I blurted out, realizing how rude it sounded to just demand she do something. “I mean, would you please do me the honor of going out on a date with me?”