Snowed In Anthology

by J. M. Snyder

  “You’re the best little brother in the world. Thank you! I’ll see you Friday!”

  We hung up and I carefully set my cell on the table. I rubbed my face hard, and blew out a breath. God, why that dish? I was pretty sure she knew what it meant, but it was possible she wasn’t thinking. I could have told her, reminded her, but she really wanted it.

  I shook my head. I wouldn’t let it get to me. It was just food. I didn’t have to have a special memory attached to it. I could do it, and Ellie’s enjoyment would replace the old memories with a new one. And that would be worlds better.

  I sighed again, then pulled up the grocery store app on my phone. With a few taps, I had the shopping list complete. Then I turned back to my computer. If I was going away in two days, I needed to get some work done.

  * * * *

  The groceries were packed in the car, and I was just grabbing my duffle when my phone rang. It was my sister’s tone, and I scrambled to swipe it.

  “Don’t hate me,” she said before I could even utter a greeting.

  “I could never,” I said fervently, then perked up. “The weekend’s cancelled?”

  “No. Don’t be silly.” She made a whiny noise. “But there’s a couple of things I need to get done for my boss before I can go.”

  “Oh.” I was both disappointed and relieved. In the past few days, I’d started to look forward to the weekend. “That’s fine. Just let me know when you’re ready and I’ll come get you.”

  “Why don’t you just head up without me? I’m not sure how long it’s going to take me, so I’ll drive up when I’m done.”

  “I don’t mind waiting. I can get some work done, too.”

  “No, really. You go. Get settled and get cooking. Then I can have a nice, yummy lunch the moment I arrive. I won’t be far behind you. Probably just a couple of hours.”

  I squinted, suspicion rising. She wasn’t that fond of driving, so I couldn’t figure out why she was suggesting I go without her. “Ellie, what’s going on?”

  “Nothing, I swear.” She sounded a little too innocent, but my sister wasn’t a liar, so I took her at face value. “Just head on up, and I’ll be right behind you.”

  Still, I hesitated. “Are you sure?”

  “Yes.” She chuckled. “Besides, Mark is home today, so maybe I can get a little something something before I head out. To tide me over.”

  I made a retching noise to make her laugh, then picked up my bag. “All right. I’ll see you in a while then.”

  “Drive safely. I love you.”

  “Ditto, Ellie.”

  We hung up, and I locked my phone and shoved it in my pocket. For a long moment, I stood there, bag in hand, and tried to decide if I was going to call her back and insist on waiting until she was done. But I knew it would be pointless, so I headed outside and got in the car.

  * * * *

  It was mostly highway driving, so I set the cruise control, turned up the radio, and blanked out a little. For an hour, I let my mind wander, trying not to think too much about the food in my backseat. Instead, I focused on how much fun it would be just to hang out with my sister. We’d always gotten along perfectly. She was only two years older, and we’d been best friends since the moment I was born. We rarely fought, and even if we did, we couldn’t stay mad at each other for long. I’d lucked out when I’d gotten her for a sister.

  After about another hour, it started to snow. Big fat flakes, lazily falling. I’d checked the weather before I left, and I knew it was going to happen. But it wasn’t supposed to be more than a few inches accumulation, and having lived in Upstate New York my entire life, I wasn’t worried about driving in it.

  But the farther north I drove, the worse the snow got. I took off the cruise, and leaned forward so I could really focus. It still wasn’t terrible, but it required all my attention. Fortunately, my exit came up quickly, and I drove off the highway and onto the backroads leading to Mark’s family’s cabin.

  “Cabin” really was a misnomer, though. It was more like a log house. It had four bedrooms, two upstairs and two down, a full bathroom on the second floor and a half bath on the first. I’d spent many a weekend there hanging out with my sister, her husband, and various members of his family. It was nice and quiet, the cabin surrounded by several acres of national forest.

  Finally, I pulled into the long private road, and thankfully I had four-wheel drive, because there was at least four inches of snow piled on it. I slid a little when I made it to the end, but managed not to crash into the porch. I breathed a sigh of relief, turned off the car, and shook out my tense muscles. I hadn’t realized how tightly I was gripping the steering wheel.

  I grabbed my bags from the back and waded through the ankle-deep snow to the front door. The lock box had a number pad, and I fished out my phone to get the code from my sister, only to find a text with the code already waiting for me. I chuckled, punched it in, and pulled out the key. The door unlocked easily, though the hinges creaked as it swung in, and I gratefully got out of the frigid air.

  It wasn’t much warmer inside, but I found the thermostat and turned it up. Almost immediately, it clicked on. I left my bags in the entryway, divested myself of my outwear, texted Ellie that I’d arrived safe and to drive carefully, then lit a fire in the fire place. I knew she’d take her time, but I was worried anyway.

  With all that done, I dropped my duffle in one of the bedrooms on the first floor, and set about unpacking the groceries. I’d planned carefully, knowing I’d be doing the cooking all weekend. It didn’t take long to get everything stored away, and when Ellie texted a few minutes later that she was finally done with work, I started the Chicken Florentine, resolutely ignoring any feelings or memories that wanted to surface.

  After two hours, I started getting concerned. Ellie hadn’t answered my texts, and I hoped it was because she was driving slowly and carefully. I kept glancing out the window and watching the snow get worse. At three hours, I moved from concern to full-out worry. Lunch was done and staying warm in the oven, and Ellie still hadn’t arrived. I’d tried to call, but it went straight to voicemail. I went out and shoveled the steps and the walk, all the while glancing down the drive and expecting to see Ellie at any moment. It took me almost an hour, and by the time I got back inside, I was heading into full-out panic.

  I was just trying to decide if I should call Mark when I heard a clomp of boots on the steps outside. I whirled around, and the door opened as I blew out a relieved breath.

  “It’s about time! I was wor…ried…”

  It wasn’t my sister. It was a yeti. A big, hulking yeti covered in snow. I squinted, because I knew that shape. Those shoulders and those legs. Even after three years, and under layers of winter wear, I knew his body.

  The yeti whipped off his hat, sending snow showering down, and my worst fear was confirmed.

  Captain Adrian Cooper.

  My ex.

  The man who broke my heart.

  Chapter 2

  My breath actually caught in my lungs, and I had to force myself to breathe. He looked good. A little older, a little more lined, but still very, very good. He smiled tentatively, and for just a second, I was taken back to the first time we’d met. We’d been in a bar, he’d caught my eye from across the room, and given me a smile just like that.

  “Hey, Jojo.”

  I instantly scowled. “You don’t get to call me that anymore. What the crap? Where’s Ellie?”

  Cooper’s smile faltered. “Uh, see. About that. She’s not coming.”

  “What?” My heart started to pound. “Why?”

  “When you wouldn’t take my calls, I contacted Ellie and—”

  “I blocked your number.” If there was viciousness in my tone, I couldn’t be blamed. I’d had to do something when he left me, heart broken and bleeding on the floor.

  The shock registered for just a split second, then his expression became utterly neutral. “Well, I guess I deserved that. Anyway, I called Ellie. She got you t
o come up here, but she was never going to join you. It was always going to be me.”

  I felt my blood pressure rise. “And she agreed to this?”

  Cooper shrugged one massive shoulder. “It was her idea.”

  Oh, my sister and I were going to have so many words when I talked to her. “She thought this would work?” I grumbled. “She reads too much romance.”

  “Half of which you lend her after you’re done reading it.”

  I shot him such a venomous look, he actually blanched. Good. He didn’t get to have intimate knowledge of my life anymore. He didn’t get to share little tidbits like he knew me. It had been three years; he’d been the one to walk out. He no longer had that privilege.

  It hurt. Seeing him again. It was like a wound that I thought had healed was suddenly ripped open, only to find it had been festering all these years. It was gross and painful, and I wanted to sew it up and pretend it didn’t exist. But here he was, in all his living glory, looking amazing and, if I didn’t miss my guess, regretful.

  Well too damn bad.

  “Look, Joj…Jonah. Can I come in and take off all the stuff? My truck got stuck halfway up the drive and I had to walk the rest.”

  “No, you cannot.” My voice sounded harsh. “You can just turn around, walk back down the drive, and get your truck unstuck. I don’t want you here. You’re not welcome.”

  He gave me a sad sort of smile. “Uh, well. No. I can’t. The roads are really bad. I heard on the radio they were closing the pass. I wouldn’t be able to get back to the highway.”

  Great. Just great. He was stuck here until the snow let up and the crews got out to clear it. Who knew how long that would take? I was praying for only a few hours. I couldn’t deal with being around him for longer than that.

  “Fine. Whatever. I wouldn’t want you to die a cold, horrible death in the snow.”

  “Thanks.” He sounded half-amused, half-grateful. I knew that tone, too. He’d once used it a lot where I was concerned.

  Christ. I pressed the heels of my hands to my eyes until I saw stars. Could this day get any worse? I never thought I’d see him again, and I was happy about that. And now he was here, and we were stuck together until the roads cleared. Fuck a duck.

  “You know,” Cooper said conversationally, his voice much closer. I pulled away my hands to see him standing at the edge of the kitchen. “Forced proximity actually works. When two people are together like this, they have to talk.”

  “Or kill each other,” I muttered.

  “Or that,” he whispered. “Something smells great.”

  Oh, yeah. Lunch. I sighed heavily and braced my hands behind me against the counter. I couldn’t look at him.

  “Ellie asked for Chicken Florentine.”

  Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him go still. “Well. Uh…”

  I nodded, and turned to the oven. I wasn’t so heartless that I wouldn’t feed him, and besides, it was his favorite dish. I’d made it for him on every birthday and every anniversary. For five years. Until I didn’t.

  “Yeah. I didn’t think she had it in her,” I said, pulling the casserole out of the oven. I nodded my chin toward a cupboard. “Plates are in there.”

  Cooper followed my directive, and within a few minutes, we were both sitting at the reclaimed wood table, heaping helpings of Chicken Florentine on our plates. Cooper kept looking at me, but I refused to meet his eye. When it became clear I wouldn’t be making conversation, he dug in.

  The moan he let out at the first bite made my stomach flip. The sounds he made had always been my undoing. He wasn’t shy about letting his pleasure show, no matter what we were doing. I used to love that about him.

  Turns out, I still kind of did. But I refused to let it show.

  We ate in silence, except for Cooper’s pleasure noises, and before long, the plates were clear. I took his and mine to the sink, turning my back on him as I ran water to wash them. I all but had a neon sign over my head proclaiming “ignoring you,” but Cooper didn’t seem to get the hint. He hovered nearby, his big body always in my peripheral vision, trying to catch my attention. I pointedly did not give it to him.

  “I hadn’t forgotten how stubborn you could be,” he said when I finally shut off the water. “But I did think this would be a little easier.”

  I pressed my lips in a tight line.

  “I just want to talk, Jonah. To clear the air.”

  At that, I whirled to face him. A few soap suds flew off my hand as I gestured wildly. “You want to talk? Now? You left me, if you remember. You were the one who walked away. I wanted to talk three fucking years ago, but you wouldn’t. But now you want to talk?”

  Cooper didn’t quail under my rage. He was a captain in the Army, and had spent the past three years deployed in a warzone. I didn’t actually think my fury would cause him to cower. He was made of much stronger stuff than that. But I didn’t expect the soft smile to grace his full lips, or the affection to suffuse his dark, brown eyes.

  There was a time when his eyes were my favorite thing on the planet. So rich and warm, and so very expressive. But now, they made me sad. All those memories, all that time, and he was looking at me like none of it had happened. I squeezed my eyes shut so I didn’t have to see.

  And then he said the last thing I ever expected.

  “I made a mistake.”

  Chapter 3

  “You…made a mistake?” I repeated just to hear the words, but they didn’t make any more sense when I said them.

  “Yes. I was wrong.”

  Cooper’s voice was a low rumble and my eyelids flew open. Never, in five years of our relationship, had I ever heard him say he was wrong. To anyone. About anything.

  “I don’t…” I had to take a breath. “You don’t say that. What the hell, Cooper?”

  My mind was spinning, because seriously, this could not be happening. Had he been replaced with a pod person? Was that why he was suddenly here, after three years, trying to make amends and saying things he’d never said?

  His expression appeared sad, and he took a step toward me, but stopped when I held up a hand. He took a deep breath, and then another, and finally gave me a wistful sort of smile.

  “When I broke things off, I thought I was doing the right thing. Really. I was getting deployed, into a warzone. Who knows what could have happened?”

  I nodded and pressed a hand to my stomach. I started speaking in a low voice. “And you think it would have been easier if we weren’t together? To hear you had been hurt or worse? You think it would have been okay just because we’d broken up?”

  By the end, my voice had risen and I was breathing hard. How could he just imagine that I’d stop loving him, and I wouldn’t have cared if something happened to him? Did he not know me at all?

  “No, not that.” He huffed out a breath. “But I was going to be gone for two years. Unable to call home except for maybe once a month. Out of contact. That wasn’t fair to you.”

  “I would have waited,” I whispered. “I would have waited and hoped and prayed.”

  That very sad smile again. “I didn’t want you to.”

  And that, right there, was the crux of it. He didn’t want me to wait for him. It was clear, just from that, Cooper wanted to move on. Which made his reappearance today feel hollow and insincere.

  Whatever else he had to say, I didn’t want to hear it. I couldn’t. Without a word, I walked out of the kitchen, through the living room, and down the short hall to the bedroom I’d claimed as my own when I’d arrived. I shut the door harder than necessary, but it felt good to get out a little of the anger.

  My heart was pounding so hard, it hurt. I paced, breathing fast and my mind racing. What the hell had just happened? I didn’t even know what to do with the thoughts and feelings battering me.

  With a shaking hand, I pulled my phone from my pocket and called Ellie. It rang once, then went to voicemail. Oh, no she didn’t! Anger surging, I stabbed out a text.

  Call. Me. Right
. Now!!!

  I waited, fuming, then finally the phone rang and my sister’s smiling face peered up at me. I swiped violently across the screen.

  “Do you hate me now?” she asked in a small voice before I could even bark out a greeting.

  “Yes. You’re fired as best friend and I’m starting divorce proceedings. You’re no longer my sister.”

  She squeaked out a pained sound. “Really?”

  I sat on the edge of the bed, then flopped backward and threw an arm over my eyes. “No, of course not. I love you. But really, El, what the hell?”

  “He was so sincere and heartbroken, Jo. I just wanted to give him a chance. Mostly for you.”

  I snorted out a mirthless laugh. “For me?”

  She sighed, her sadness evident. “You need…closure. I mean, if it works out, great. You know I love Cooper, and you guys were great together. You love him. Or did, once. But if you can’t get back together, if that’s too much or too far…” I imagined her shrugging, because I knew her that well. And then she sighed again. “Closure, Jonah. I thought at the very least you could get that.”

  I didn’t respond, because when it came right down to it, she was right. No matter what else, I deserved to have the full story and move on from Adrian Cooper. A part of my heart was still attached to him. And maybe it always would be. But if I heard him out, maybe that part of me could finally heal instead of seeping like a raw and infected wound.

  Ugh. That was gross imagery. But accurate.

  “Is it bad?” she whispered, pulling me out of my thoughts.

  “Yes.” I swallowed. “No. Maybe? It’s…he said he made a mistake. That he was wrong.”

  “Cooper said that?”

  I had to smile, just a little, at her disbelief. At least her surprise validated my own. I shook my head and rolled to lay on my side. I tucked the phone between my ear and the mattress, even though that made speaking a little difficult. “Yeah, I don’t know what to do with it either.”

  “Maybe you should talk to him?” she suggested tentatively.

  “Not right now. Maybe later. Or in the morning. Before I leave.”