by Anna Brooks
“Okay,” I whisper. “Whatever you need.” Whenever, wherever, I’ll hold her. I’ll never let her go if she asks. Even if she doesn’t ask, I’m never letting her go.
She exhales a huge breath, and I find myself holding mine. This girl, this shy, sweet girl, has a hold on me so tightly that I don’t think I’ll ever be able to exist without her. I’ve never ever felt like this; it’s even worse, or better rather, than I remember. And each minute I spend with her it pulls at me stronger and stronger. She couldn’t say anything that would change that, but I need to know what’s going on with her so I can help her.
I want to ask about who she went to see in the back of the apartment. I’ve been holding it in since she first came outside, but when she’s ready, I know she’ll tell me. I don’t want to push her into anything she’s not ready for, and that includes what she wants to talk about.
“My entire life was spent with a bodyguard. I don’t remember a day of my life when somebody wasn’t watching me. Controlling my every move.”
She reaches over to the coffee table and grabs a tissue before continuing. “Stanley, he was my bodyguard. He hit me, slapped me, roughed me up sometimes. Grabbed me, pushed me, stuff like that.”
I’m forcing myself to stay calm, physically holding myself back from showing her how livid I am right now. There is no reason to ever put your hands on a woman, my woman, let alone a young girl, and the fact that she talks so casually about it infuriates me.
“Dad treated my mom and me like we were possessions. I never felt like he loved me; he only wanted to use me as a … a pawn. It’s really hard to explain. Part of me doesn’t even understand it myself, but I hated him my entire life. I couldn’t even go to the library or a store without being watched. It was horrible.”
“I bet it was.”
“He just wanted to control us. To control me and make me into this puppet who said, ‘Yes, Daddy.’ But that wasn’t me. I rebelled, and I fought for my freedom. I wanted to live.” She turns her head so she’s looking at me. “I wanted to fly.”
“Ruby.” I don’t even know what to say. I’m not sure she wants me to say anything, so I continue listening.
She rests her back against my chest and looks at the ceiling. “But I had Stan. Everywhere I went, he followed me. He followed Dad’s orders, never letting me do anything I wanted to do. Once a week, I got the privilege,” she says with sarcasm, “to go to the library and to the ice cream shop to get a waffle cone with Stanley on my heels. I always sat on the bench to eat my ice cream so I could watch people and imagine their life was mine. That I wasn’t a prisoner being controlled by a monster. Part of why I went to the roof, too. I did the same type of imagining from there.”
As she talks, I can’t help but worry I’m an idiot, scaring her off with my possessive nature. But I wouldn’t control her like that, just protect her. There’s a big difference.
“Then three years ago, the day after I met you—” Abruptly, she stops and jumps off the couch. “God, I can’t believe I’m telling you this. What is wrong with me?”
I stand and try to grab her, but she pushes me off. “Hey, it’s fine. You’re fine, Ruby.”
“No.” Her arms wrap around her waist, and she shakes her head. “No, I’m not. I’m so fucked up, Pierce. I can’t do this right now. You need to leave.” When I take a step toward her again, she backs up and waves me off. “Stop.”
“Stop?”
“You don’t want this.” She motions at herself and wipes at the tears on her face.
“Yes. I do, Ruby. I want you very much.”
“I’m such a mess, Pierce. One minute I want to be friends, and the next I want nothing to do with you. Then in the next breath, your hands are down my pants, and thirty seconds later, I’m telling you about the deepest, darkest parts of me. I think I just need some time, because I desperately want to move the hell on with my life. I want normal … and I want you.” She ends on a whisper. “But it’s just happening so fast. I didn’t think it would happen like this. I didn’t even think you’d recognize me, let alone want to be with me.”
It’s understandable that she’d want to process what’s going on with her. It realIy is. And I honestly don’t know what to do right now; all I know is I need to find out who this guy is and kill him. “I’ll go, then. Give you a little bit of time. But don’t for one second, think that what we’re starting is over.”
She runs her fingers through her hair and shakes her head. “I don’t want it to be, but I’m so confused and so afraid of … everything. Life, relationships, all of it. I didn’t have a normal childhood experience because I was so sheltered. My job at the store is the first one I’ve ever had and the only reason I took it is because I need money for—”
I walk up and grab her face, shutting her up with my mouth. She stiffens momentarily but quickly relaxes and tentatively touches her tongue to mine. My poor dick can’t take any more teasing, so I give her a final kiss. “Tell me where I can find this guy.”
“Who?”
“Whoever hurt you,” I answer with a growl.
“I’m sure they’re back there, but I don’t want anything to do with them. Ever again.” She looks away and walks to the door. “I’m really sorry, Pierce, I just—”
“You don’t need to apologize to me. I understand, and I’m going to go. But I’ll pick you up in the morning to take you to work.”
“Okay.”
“Okay.” I kiss her forehead and leave after I hear the click of her deadbolt.
Once I get in my car, I head to the pub. I came here out of habit, even though I should probably just go home and be alone. I’ll only stay for a little bit; maybe it’d be good for me to be around people for a little while before I torture myself with thoughts of Ruby tonight. I walk in and step behind the bar to grab a juice and say hi to Lisa, one of the bartenders.
“Hey, Pierce. What’s with the long face?”
“I don’t have a long face.” I rest against the counter and cross my arms, dangling the bottle with my fingers.
“Whatever you say.” She walks closer and leans in. “Woman troubles. I can tell from a mile away.”
“What the fuck?”
The rumble of Nik’s pissed-off voice makes Lisa jump, but I squint my eyes at him in confusion. Once I see the way he’s looking at Lisa, it dawns on me.
“Hey, man.” I smile at him, and Lisa scurries away, avoiding any further conversation. “Got it bad, huh?” My tone is light, but when he steps into my space, I straighten my back and raise my eyebrows.
“Stay the fuck away from her, Pierce.”
I set the juice on the counter and hold my hands up. “Not even on my radar, Nik. But I must say,”—I smile—“it’s fun seeing you like this.”
He runs his hands through his hair and looks back at Lisa. She’s leaning over the bar serving a customer who is staring right at Lisa’s chest. Nik’s fists tighten and he looks back at me. “Fun? You think this is fun. You ever wanted a woman so fucking bad you can’t even breathe without your fucking chest hurting? This is not fun, Pierce. It’s fucking brutal.”
* * *
After hanging out at the pub for a while to clear my head, I go home. I only wanted a distraction and even being there didn’t do that for me. I strip down and hop under the covers then call Ruby, glad that I remembered to exchange numbers. I’m sure she’s sleeping by now, but I chance it anyway. I want to make sure she’s okay, but selfishly, I just want to talk to her.
When she suddenly stopped talking earlier, she looked afraid. A memory invaded her thoughts and chilled her. I have an awful feeling I know what she’s going to say, but I’m not going to press her for anything. I’ll let her tell me when she’s ready. In the meantime, I can be there for her in whatever way she needs.
When she told me tonight that she was only twenty-one, I was surprised. She doesn’t look like it, and she doesn’t act like it. And hell, three years ago means she was only eighteen, and she certainly didn’t see
m like it then. Maybe it should, but it really doesn’t bother me. I was dead serious what I told her.
“Hello,” she answers on the first ring.
“Hey, angel.”
“Why do you call me that?”
“Because you are. You’re my angel.”
“Hmm. What did you do after you left?”
“Went to the pub to see my sister, but she wasn’t working so I just hung out with Nik and Zack for a little bit. No siblings for you, right?”
Her breath hitches, and she clears her throat. “No. So what are you doing now? It’s really late.”
The change of subject is obvious, so I respect that and move on. “Nothing. Lying in bed. I just wanted to make sure you were okay before I went to sleep. I really wish you were here, though. I wish I could hold you and assure you everything is going to be okay. ’Cause it will be.”
“That would be nice.”
“What are you doing?”
“Uhh … I’m actually in the bathtub.”
My phone falls from my hand, and I quickly scramble to pick it up. “Sorry.” God, just imagining her wet, soapy body makes my cock stand at full attention. Imagining her in a hazmat suit turns me on, though, so …
“It’s okay.”
“Isn’t it a little late to be taking a bath?”
“I don’t sleep well and sometimes taking a bath helps. I’ve actually been going to the grocery store that’s open all night. It’s really bright and I can waste a couple of hours there and when I get home, I’m actually tired enough to sleep. I was never able to go to the store alone before, so it’s kind of fun, too.” The sound of water splashing echoes into the receiver, and I wiggle my legs a bit to get more comfortable.
“What are you doing now?”
“Just getting out. The water was cold.”
I bite the inside of my cheek so I don’t say something stupid to make her think I’m a pervert.
“Why aren’t you sleeping?” she asks.
“’Cause I can’t stop thinking about you.”
“Oh.” The rustle of something followed by a squeak tells me she’s in the recliner.
“Yeah. So you said sometimes a bath helps. How often don’t you sleep well?”
“Almost every night. It sucks, but I’m used to it.”
A thought enters my mind and I debate for a whole two seconds before I decide to go for it. “Do you trust me, Ruby?”
“I think so,” she answers honestly.
“Do you know I’d never hurt you?”
A moment of silence passes before she answers quietly. “Yes.”
“Good. I wouldn’t. You know that, right?”
“Yeah, Pierce.” Her words are more confident now, and the way my name rolls off her tongue causes a wet spot to form on the white sheet covering me.
I groan into the phone and grab my dick. “Ruby?”
“Hmm?”
“Will you try something with me?”
“Sure.”
“It’ll help you sleep.”
“What is it, Pierce?”
“Touch yourself.”
“What?” She gasps and the squeak sounds again. I picture her sitting up in shock.
“Have you ever fingered yourself before?”
“It’s kind of personal.”
“Trust me, Ruby.”
“Pierce, I don’t know …”
“I’m touching myself right now. My cock is so hard, Ruby. It’s always hard for you. Only you. All I have to do is think about your beautiful face, and it’s like a damn steel rod.”
“Pierce, I …”
“Are you on the chair in the living room?”
“Yes,” she whispers.
“Lean back, angel. Just relax. I’ll walk you through it.”
“I don’t know if I can.”
“You can.”
Another squeak and I say a silent thank-you.
“Okay.”
“Okay. What are you wearing?”
“I just slipped on my sweats and a t-shirt.”
“No panties?”
“No.” I hear her swallow and clear her throat then I stick my hand under the covers and pull my dick out from under them.
I’d give anything to have her next to me right now. Her delicate hand gripping me, stroking me, and then when my pre-cum started to leak out, she’d use her finger and spread it around the head. Or she’d lean down and lick it off with the tip of her silky tongue.
“Slide your hand under your pants.”
“Okay.”
“What do you do when you’re alone, Ruby. Do you rub your clit or do you stick your fingers in your tight little hole? Or do you just play with it, tease it?”
She gasps and another bead spills out of my dick. Jesus, I’m gonna come already.
“I don’t.”
“You don’t touch yourself?” No way. There’s no way.
“Not with someone watching, and I feel like you’re watching me … it’s making me nervous.” Her voice fades, and she sounds ashamed.
“Hey.” I quickly cut off her negative thoughts. “It’s okay. I promise you’re gonna like it.”
“I already do.” She laughs.
“I wish I was there to see you right now. Touch yourself, just do what feels good. Slide your fingers all around there, Ruby. Don’t be afraid, just feel.”
A small moan escapes her lips. “Okay.” She’s silent before a groan of frustration passes through my ear.
“Take your finger, just one, and slide it between your pretty pussy, up and down. Do it nice and slow, baby. Just enough that it makes you want more. Keep doing that until you don’t think you can do it anymore. Pretend it’s me. Pretend my finger’s in there. I’d tease you so bad … make your hips shoot off the bed, but I wouldn’t press any harder, so light, just enough to drive you crazy. My finger would be drenched by now. I bet it’d be dripping down my arm.”
“Okay,” she pants.
“Are you wet?”
“Yes. Really wet.”
“Good. Now, get some of your sweet juice on your finger and bring it up to your clit then rub it around there. In nice little circles. Not too hard yet, though. You’ve gotta wait for it. Let it build up. We have all night. It feels good, doesn’t it?”
“So good.”
I stroke myself slow, trying to hold off coming until she does. I bring my hand down and cup my balls, squeezing them a little tighter than I should. “Tell me how you’re doing it. Fast? Slow? Are you going in circles or up and down?”
“I’m doing it slow, but …”
“If I were there, I’d take my other finger and put it inside you. Can you do that for me since I’m not there? Can you keep rubbing your clit and put your other finger inside, Ruby?”
“Yeah … Oh, God.”
“Ugh. You like that? That sweet little hole all filled up?”
“Yes.”
“Put another one in with it and fuck yourself, baby. In and out, nice and slow. I bet it’s tight, huh?”
“Yes.”
I can’t take it anymore and pump myself at a furious pace. God, picturing her fingering herself … her skin is probably all flushed, her mouth hanging open … my cum flies out and lands on my stomach, a loud grunt escapes my lips.
“Fuck, just thinking about it made me come, Ruby. You’re a naughty girl, making me come without even touching me. Making me a liar. I said I wasn’t gonna come until I was inside you. Finger yourself faster, come with me while it’s still pouring out of me. Wait till you feel your walls squeeze around your fingers. Fuck, I bet when they clamp down around my dick, it’ll be like heaven.”
Her breathing picks up, and I know she’s close. “I can hear it, baby. I can hear how wet you are, your fingers slamming up inside you. I bet you can take three. Put another finger in there. Rub your clit harder, Ruby. Make yourself come. Come for me. I wanna hear you come.”
It’s even faster now, and even though I just came all over myself, I’m getting hard agai
n. Damn, this woman is going to kill me.
“Next time I see you, Ruby, it’s gonna be my fingers inside you. I’m going to fuck you so good, baby. Think you can fit three of my fingers inside there? I’m gonna suck on your little nub and when you come all over my fingers, I’ll let you lick them clean so you can see how good you taste. Would you like that? Or would you rather me fuck you with my tongue so I can lick up all your sweet juice?”
“Ugh,” she moans, and a high-pitched squeal pierces my ears. “Holy shit.” I can’t help the smirk that crosses my face when I hear that sound. I can’t wait till I can swallow her moans with my mouth as she milks every drop out of me. God, I can’t wait.
I give her a minute to come down while I get up and go to the bathroom to clean myself off. I’m a damn mess, so I’ll just wait a minute and then take a shower since a towel isn’t going to work with the huge load dripping down my chest.
“Oh God.” She laughs. “That was …”
“Perfect, amazing, beautiful.”
“Wow.”
“I’m serious, Ruby. Next time I see you, I want to be the one to make you come.”
“I think you just did.” I love that she has humor in her voice right now.
“Yeah, but I still haven’t tasted you properly, and it’s killing me.” She doesn’t respond, and I notice her breathing has evened out. “Ruby?”
“Hmm?”
“Sleep, baby.”
“Okay. Thank you, Pierce.”
“Night, angel.”
“Night.”
Chapter 11
Ruby
PIERCE SMILES WHEN HE walks into the store and my heart jumps.
“Hey.”
I barely lift my hand up enough to wave at him. “Hi.” I say the word, but I’m pretty sure he doesn’t hear me since he’s already at the back of the store looking through the cooler.
Breathe, Ruby. In and out. He’s just a guy. A gorgeous, sweet, kind guy. A guy who talked so dirty to you last night you get wet just thinking about it.
I plaster on a smile, but when I catch the reflection of myself in the little mirror fastened to the cabinet, my lips turn down. I look like an idiot, like I’m trying too hard. I saw him just this morning when he gave me a ride. But still, he makes it hard to breathe.