Summer of the Loon

by Deanna Lynn Sletten

  Chase held Ali close as the sun dropped low in the sky. Ali didn't know how she was going to find out for sure if Halverson was her father, but she knew she had to find out, somehow.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Ali found herself drawn to town more often as the summer days slipped by. If Ben or Jo needed an errand run, she offered. If she had an hour or more of time off, she asked Ben if she could use the truck to go to town. She used the excuse that she wanted to talk to Megan in California and they believed her. But talking to Megan wasn't the real reason she wanted to go. She went to sit in front of the coffeehouse and try to catch a glimpse of Jared Halverson. She thought if she could watch him, she might find some familiar trait about him that might prove or disprove her theory that he was her father. But every time she saw him, she couldn't help but cringe at the idea of being related to him.

  One afternoon as Ali sat outside the coffeehouse with Kat, sipping a caramel cappuccino and eating a brownie that Kat had brought out for her, Halverson walked down the sidewalk on the opposite side of the street and entered The Loon's Nest. Ali saw nothing in the way he moved or walked that hinted at the fact that they were related.

  "Hard to believe he was considered a hunk back in his day, huh?" Kat asked, wrinkling her nose at the sight of Halverson.

  Ali turned and looked over at Kat. "Really? How do you know that?"

  "My mom told me that the other day after he'd been in for coffee," Kat said. "He always gets a cup of black coffee after sitting all afternoon in The Loon's Nest. I guess he thinks it will sober him up before he drives home."

  Ali could care less about his coffee drinking habits. She wanted to know more of what Karen had said. "What about the hunk thing?"

  Kat shrugged. "Guess he was the cutest guy in high school back then. All the girls wanted to go out with him. My mom said that your mom was thrilled when he'd asked her to the prom and all the other senior girls were jealous. She figured your mom had a big crush on him like all the other girls did."

  Ali stared at The Loon's Nest as she thought about this. She'd seen pictures of him in the old yearbooks, and she guessed that he was okay looking for his time. She'd never thought that he was that special, though. "Did your mom say anything else?"

  "Just that he never dated anyone for very long. One or two dates. She said he wasn't really that nice to the girls. He was too cocky. Too full of himself. As far as I'm concerned, he still is. He's nothing like Chase is. Everyone wants to date Chase, too, but he's always nice to all the girls and honest, too. Chase never takes advantage of his good looks and sweet personality to use girls. That just makes girls like him even more."

  Ali thought about what Kat had said all the rest of that day and that evening as she sat in her bedroom, the yearbooks spread out around her. Had Halverson used his charm on her mom to get her to have sex with him, then dumped her as fast as he had all the other girls? Was that why her mother had never told her about him?

  Ali opened her mother's senior yearbook again and looked through the pages, reading all the words her friends had written. She found the back corner where the words were scribbled out, held it up to the light but couldn't read through the scribbling. If only it had been written on one of the pages, she might have seen what was written from the other side when held up to the light. She sensed that the scribbled out words had been written by Halverson, and her mother had blocked them out after she was betrayed by him. No other explanation made sense.

  Using her thumbnail, Ali scraped at the corner of the yearbook cover to see if the paper would peel off a little so she could look at the back of it. To her surprise, the paper peeled off easily and from behind it a five by seven photo fell out. Ali gasped. There, in full color, were her mom and Jared Halverson dressed up for prom, standing in a typical prom photo pose. Her mom wore the wrist corsage and Halverson wore the blue bow tie.

  Ali stared at the young woman who only nine months later would become her mother. She was beautiful. Karen had been right, her mother's topaz blue dress shimmered under the lights and swept to the floor like a Hollywood starlet's gown. Her mom's light blonde hair was up, showing off her creamy shoulders, and her blue eyes sparkled in the light. To Ali's surprise, Halverson looked handsome in his black tux with a topaz blue vest, cummerbund, and bow tie. Her mother looked so young and innocent, standing there in front of the black wall with gold stars on it, that it brought tears to Ali's eyes. This was before life had worn her mother down, when her mother's eyes were clear and bright instead of dulled from drugs and alcohol. This was before her mother became fragile and could no longer handle reality. Before Ali was born and changed everything.

  Ali brushed away tears and turned the photo over. These words had also been scribbled over, but Ali could still read them. It said, "Prom, 1996, Jen and Jared". Surrounding the words, her mother had drawn hearts and stars, but then had scribbled over it all with a heavy, black pen.

  "He broke her heart," Ali said aloud. "He'd taken her to prom, made her feel special, then used her and threw her away." Ali could only imagine how devastated her mother had felt when she found out that the boy she'd crushed on hadn't really cared about her at all. She'd just been another girl. Except that her mother hadn't turned out to be just another girl. She'd ended up being the mother of his child.

  Ali lifted the yearbook up to the light from the oil lamp to try and read the words that were scribbled out. It was a short passage, and she was reading it backwards, but she could make it out just the same. "It was a blast! JH."

  "Jerk," Ali said. "What an obnoxious jerk." Ali imagined her mother had been so distraught, she'd scribbled over the words in the yearbook and on the photo, and hidden the photo away so no one could see evidence of who she'd been in love with.

  Ali slipped the photo back into the lining and gently closed the yearbook. She packed it away in the box and closed the lid, then slipped back into bed and curled up under her mother's quilt. Outside, the sounds of night drifted in her open windows. The flame from the oil lamp flickered, causing shadows to bounce around on the ceiling and walls. Ali just lay there, thinking. Halverson knew she was his daughter. He had to. That's why he stared at her every time he passed by her. He knew, but he wasn't going to acknowledge her. She could almost bet her grandfather knew, or at least suspected, that Halverson was her father, too. Why else would he hate the man so much? Well, she decided, Halverson wasn't going to get away with ignoring her so easily. As she lay there in bed, she decided that it was time Halverson met his daughter, and at least acknowledge her existence.

  ***

  The next day Ali asked her grandfather if she could use the truck to go into town and visit with Kat for a while. She brought it up casually at breakfast, thinking it would be like any other day and he'd just agree to let her go. What she hadn't counted on was Chase offering to take her to town instead.

  "I have to go in and get a few things at the hardware store for Mom," Chase said between bites of pancakes. "You can ride with me."

  Ali didn't dare say no or else it would look suspicious. So she agreed, and they were off to town later in the afternoon. With any luck, Chase would drop her off at the coffeehouse and she'd finish her errand before Chase was done with his.

  Ali spoke very little as she fidgeted with her phone on the drive into town. When they arrived, Chase pulled into Chet's parking lot and stopped the truck.

  "Want to come in? I won't be long," Chase said, smiling.

  "I think I'll just walk down to the coffeehouse and see Kat," Ali replied as she climbed down from the truck's cab.

  Chase's smile faded. "Is everything okay?" he asked.

  Ali put on a fake smile. "Sure. Why wouldn't it be? I'll see you in a few minutes." She turned and walked down the street at a fast clip.

  Once there, Ali went inside and ordered sweet tea from Karen. Karen told her that Kat wasn't working that day and was at home, but she could call Kat to let her know Ali was in town.

  "Oh, no, that's okay. I'm waiting fo
r Chase anyway," Ali told her. Ali was actually relieved that Kat wasn't there. The fewer people who knew what she was about to do, the better.

  Ali went out and sat on the bench swing in front of the coffeehouse, waiting for Halverson to go into The Loon's Nest. She hoped she wasn't late. Halverson usually went there every day about this time, so Ali was counting on him sticking to his usual schedule. With any luck, he'd show up before Chase did, and she'd be able to approach him without Chase knowing.

  Unfortunately, Ali's luck didn't hold. Chase's truck came down the street a few minutes later and parked in front of the coffeehouse. Ali pulled out her phone and pretended she was texting Megan so it would look like she'd been busy instead of scoping out Halverson.

  "Want anything?" Chase asked when he walked up to Ali. "I'm going to get a cookie."

  Ali shook her head and Chase went on inside. Ali heard Chase say hello to Karen. It was past two o'clock, and Halverson still hadn't come down the street. Ali was worried. What if he didn't come today? What if he was actually working and wasn't anywhere near Auburn? She'd built up her nerve to approach him today and she wasn't sure if she could make herself do it another day instead.

  "What'cha looking at?" Chase asked as he came out the door and sat down beside Ali.

  Ali jumped. She turned and looked at Chase. "What?"

  Chase chuckled. "It looked like you were boring a hole through that wall across the street with your eyes. I was wondering what you were looking at."

  "I was just spacing out, I guess," Ali said.

  They sat there a while as Ali sipped her sweet tea and Chase ate his cookie. The day was cloudy and breezy, not exactly a beautiful day but at least it wasn't hot and humid. Ali kept searching the sidewalks for Halverson, but he hadn't shown up yet.

  "Ready to go home?" Chase asked.

  "No!" Ali blurted out. She realized how desperate she sounded, so she added, "I just want to sit here a while."

  Chase sat back and folded his arms. He looked directly at Ali. "Okay. What's going on?"

  Ali tried to look contrite. "Nothing."

  "I may not have known you long," Chase said, "but I know you pretty well. Something is going on with you. Just tell me, okay?"

  Ali bit her lip. She realized that if Halverson did show up and walk into The Loon's Nest, Chase would know what she was doing anyway. "Okay," she finally said. "But this is just between you and me." Chase nodded and Ali took a deep breath. "I'm waiting for Jared Halverson to go into The Loon's Nest."

  Chase frowned. "Why?"

  "I'm going to tell him he has a daughter."

  Chase slumped back on the bench, his eyes wide. "Are you kidding me? Or maybe I should ask, are you crazy? You can't just go up to him and say that. You don't even know if it's true."

  "I know enough to believe it's true," Ali told him. "I have to do this, Chase. I have to do this for my mom."

  Out of the corner of her eye, Ali saw Halverson walking down the street. She turned her head and so did Chase. They watched as he turned into The Loon's Nest. Ali set down her cup and started to rise.

  Chase grasped her hand. "Don't Ali. Please. Talk to Ben first. Make sure it's really Halverson. Don't go in there. You may not like what you hear."

  Ali wavered a moment, then slipped her hand from Chase's. "I have to do this, Chase. No matter what happens." She took off across the street. Without hesitating, Chase followed her.

  Ali stepped into The Loon's Nest and stopped, letting her eyes adjust to the darkened room. She'd been in here countless times with Chase to play foosball or pool after a movie. To the right was the bar that ran along the side of the room. Booths lined the other wall and tables sat in the middle. The game tables were off in the back room. A flat screen television hung up over the bar. Today, it was playing an old movie without the sound on. Luke, the owner, smiled over at Ali as she entered. He was tall and heavyset with unruly black hair and a goatee, but he was a teddy bear of a man. The only other person in the room was Halverson, sitting at the end of the bar with a mug of beer in front of him.

  Behind her, Ali heard someone enter the door and she turned to see Chase standing there, slowly shaking his head at her. But Ali couldn't stop now. It was now or never.

  Ali approached the bar and stopped to stand beside Halverson who was sitting on a tall barstool. Halverson turned and looked at her. Sitting on the stool, he was at eye level with Ali. His eyes were dull and uncaring.

  "Hmmm. I was wondering how long it would be before you showed up," Halverson said without emotion. "So, did your grandfather send you to see me?"

  Ali frowned. She hadn't expected him to talk first, much less accuse her grandfather of instigating their meeting. "No," she said evenly. "I came here on my own."

  Halverson took a drink of his beer then turned back to Ali. "Well, say what you have to say then and get it over with."

  Ali stared at him, unsure if she even wanted to continue. Despite his dress slacks and button down shirt, he looked almost ragged. His hair was mussed, his face was already sprouting a five o'clock shadow, and his breath smelled of alcohol. For sixteen years she'd wanted a father, but not this man. He was the exact opposite of what she'd pictured as her father.

  "Well?" Halverson said, staring at her with those dark, piercing eyes.

  "You went to the prom with my mother. Nine months later I was born. Are you my father?" Ali asked, plain and simple.

  Halverson grunted. "Did Jen tell you I was?"

  Ali shook her head slowly. "She never told me who my father was."

  "Good. Then I can deny it all I want." Halverson turned away and stared down into his beer.

  "Are you my father?" Ali asked again.

  Halverson sighed. "Listen, kid. If you want something from me, you're too late. You're not going to get a damned thing. I already have a wife and three kids who have sucked the life and money out of me. Besides, I gave up any claim to you the day I told Jen I'd pay for the abortion to get her off my back. I told her then that if she kept the kid, she was on her own."

  Ali's mouth dropped open. "You wanted her to kill me?"

  Halverson's lips became a thin line. "You weren't a person yet. You were just a mistake that was going to ruin my life. Don't you get it? I had a college basketball scholarship and I was going places. The last thing I needed was some pregnant girl insisting I take care of her and a kid."

  Ali stood there, stunned. She couldn't believe the cold words coming from this man. How could anyone be so heartless? "Didn't you ever even wonder about me or what had happened to my mom? You had a child out in the world somewhere, and you never even wanted to know who she was or what had become of her?"

  Halverson leveled his gaze on Ali. "No. I never gave it another thought until you came back here. And once you walk out that door, I'll never think about you again."

  Ali hadn't expected anything from this man, but the cruelty of his words was more than she could take. Tears filled her eyes as anger rose inside her. "I'm glad I never knew you," she spat at him. "My life was better off without you in it. You're a cruel, cold, heartless creep that nobody likes or wants to be around. I hope you enjoy the rest of your miserable, drunken life." Ali turned on her heel and stormed out of the bar as Halverson's laughter followed her outside.

  Chase followed her back to the truck and once inside, Ali immediately broke down in tears. When he tried to comfort her, Ali only brushed him away and told him to take her home.

  ***

  Ben was pulling fishing gear out of a boat and Jo was weeding her flower garden by the porch when Chase pulled up alone in his truck.

  "Oh, good, you're back," Ben said. "The group I took out caught a few good ones, so I'll need help cleaning them before supper. Where's Ali?"

  "I left her up at the cabin," Chase said.

  "Well, go on up and tell her to come help Jo. She just got a call from a family that wants to rent a cabin for the week so the Moose cabin needs cleaning before tonight," Ben said.

  Chase look
ed between Ben and his mother. "I can go clean up the cabin, then I'll help you with the fish," he told Ben.

  Ben and Jo both stared at Chase.

  "Don't be silly. That's Ali's job. Go on and get her," Ben said.

  Chase was about to protest when Jo stepped in. "Is Ali okay? Did something happen in town?"

  Chase stood there a moment as if debating what to say. Finally, he spoke. "Ali talked with Jared Halverson in town today. He was awful to her."

  Ben's face creased with anger. "Why in the hell would Ali talk to Halverson?"

  "She figured out that he's her father," Chase said. "She wanted to confront him about it. He didn't deny it. In fact, he pretty much said he was her father. Then he said some pretty nasty things to her, like he didn't care that she was his daughter, and he had wanted Jen to abort the pregnancy. It was terrible. Ali cried the entire way home and said she wanted to be alone for a while."

  Ben held in his rage the entire time Chase talked, but his face was red and his eyes sparked with hatred.

  "That God damned son of a bitch," Ben growled. "He doesn't deserve to walk the same planet as my Ali." Ben dropped what he'd been carrying and pulled the truck keys out of his pocket. "Where was he when this happened?" he asked Chase.

  "Ben, what are you going to do?" Jo asked.

  "What I should have done years ago," Ben told her with certainty. He turned back to Chase. "Where?"

  "The Loon's Nest," Chase told him.

  Ben headed over to his truck with Jo right behind him. "Ben, stop. Don't do anything you'll regret."

  Ben turned and looked at Jo, his expression a cross between anger and sadness. "Sweetie, I already have too many regrets. This is one thing I won't regret." He hopped up into the cab and took off.

  It wasn't long before Ben was in town and parked outside The Loon's Nest. He stepped out of his truck and headed with purpose into the bar. Luke saw him first.