In Another World With My Smartphone: Volume 17

by Patora Fuyuhara

  We waited quite a while, but we managed to secure a table inside. But what awaited me in the restaurant just made me nervous.

  It was... over the top levels of gaudy. It was so pompous in there that I felt very out of place. There were various stuffed magic beast heads lining the walls as decoration, as well as strange illustrations I couldn’t really recognize. There was also a massive golden pig statue made of solid gold. I could only assume the weird pig was their mascot or something.

  I sighed a little, but figured that the interior design of the place probably didn’t reflect the taste on the menu.

  Speaking of the menu, I opened it up and saw an alphabet that Yae and Lu didn’t recognize. I quickly cast [Reading] so we could all understand what we were ordering. But even after that, I had no idea what things like “Grilled Black Dras Pork” and “Papalacan Country-style Stew” were supposed to be.

  “Hm... I do not know what would taste best, I do not.”

  “Some pictures would be helpful, yeah...”

  Photographs existed in the Reverse World, but they weren’t so widespread that they were used on menus. Nobles took family photos together, and photographs were used in newspapers, but that was about it. It was a little frustrating not to know what your food would look like.

  “I shall order a platter of meat for now, I shall.”

  “And I’ll go with this fish... I think it’s fish?”

  “Guess I’ll get this pasta, then.”

  We didn’t exactly know what we were ordering, but this was a restaurant! Obviously it had to be edible.

  We flagged down the waitress and ordered our food. Eventually, our order came and was placed down in front of us.

  The meal I ordered looked kinda like spaghetti bolognese. There were little red strips of meat mixed in with the sauce. It was slightly different to the kind I had back in Japan, but looked close enough. The sauce was a little thinner, too.

  “Guess I’ll try it out...” I scooped up some of the spaghetti with my fork, rolled it around and put it in my mouth.

  Mm... Ah?! L-Lemme just have another bite, and... Hm... I looked up to see Yae and Lu staring at me anxiously.

  Mm... This is interesting... The seasoning is faint, and subtle.

  It tastes pretty okay, not bad. I’ll certainly eat it, but... How do I put this, exactly? It’s just decent. The more I eat the less impressed I am. There’s just something slightly off about the taste.

  In all honesty, Lu and Crea cooked things that tasted a lot better than the food I was eating.

  We all continued eating our food in silence. Leaving any part of your meal behind was bad manners, after all. I wondered if it was just a matter of personal taste, so I tried eating a little from Lu and Yae’s meals, too. Sadly, their food wasn’t all that good either.

  We finished up our meal and settled the check. The amount we paid kinda felt like a rip-off, though... It wasn’t enough to make your eyes pop out of your skull, but it was still more than I’d have liked to pay.

  We left the restaurant and walked around before I finally spoke up.

  “Guess we screwed up going there. The food wasn’t bad, but it was a little... Meh.”

  “Mm. I thought it would be delicious because of the big line, I did... But perhaps because of Lu-dono and Crea-dono cooking so much, our tastes have become too refined, perhaps.”

  “I’m not sure if it’s that. I overheard a conversation from a nearby table. I think eating there is more about prestige than flavor. They were talking about how great it was that they got to eat at such a fancy establishment... so I think it might just be for the sake of appearances.”

  ...People eat there just to say they ate there? I guess it does look really fancy from the outside, but that’s still kinda dumb.

  It bothered me that such an expensive, high-class looking place had such average food.

  Although that was a pretty smart strategy on the part of the management. If you attracted people with a gaudy decor and weird menu items, you’d end up becoming popular. People didn’t usually talk about plain-looking places.

  “I didn’t feel any love in that food at all. There was no enthusiasm for the art or craft of cooking! It was just a prepared dish... Nothing more nothing less.”

  Lu raised a fair observation. Even if you used the greatest of ingredients, it was up to the quality of the chef to bring out the best in the meal.

  “Thankfully we did not eat a lot, we did not... Oh, there is another restaurant across the street, there is!”

  “Hm?”

  Yae pointed toward another building. It was a small red-brick building with a tiled roof. It seemed fairly unassuming. There was a little rabbit on the signboard.

  Nobody was lined up outside... Probably because all the attention was on the Golden Pig opposite the street.

  “Hm... Perhaps we could cleanse our palate there... But it looks a little run-down.”

  “Hm? It may look run-down, but it could be good, could it not?”

  “It ain’t run-down!”

  “Whoa!”

  We were surprised by the sudden voice of a child from behind us. We turned and saw an eight-year-old girl. Her hair was tied up in twintails, and she looked at us with an irritated expression on her face.

  “Mom’s cooking is the best! We’re way nicer than those pig guys!”

  “Your mom?”

  Huh... Your parents own that place or something? Yae and I heaved an awkward sigh. We’d been caught out badmouthing the place...

  “Sorry. We just got done eating at that pig restaurant, and it didn’t really taste all that good. Are you saying that smaller one’s better?”

  “You bet I am! We don’t have a lot on the menu, but it tastes real good! Come and see!”

  Lu was a lot more delicate than us, and gently smiled toward the kid. Huh... Is it a specialty restaurant or something? Like a place that only does fish, maybe.

  “Alright, let’s eat there. There are three of us, can you get us a table?”

  “No prob! Oh, my name’s Fizz! You’re gonna love eating at the Little Bunny, I promise!”

  The kid, Fizz, ran on ahead to the restaurant as if leading us. Little Bunny, huh...? Do they only cook rabbit or something? Huh... Hold on, the sign doesn’t say it’s open...

  Fizz completely disregarded that and opened the front door with a little key around her neck.

  We walked in after her. Unlike the previous restaurant we had been to, this one had a calm and understated interior design. Even though it was a brickwork building, it felt almost like a log cabin with a warm and cozy atmosphere about it.

  The restaurant had leylightstones placed here and there, but the sun also came in through a small skylight in the middle.

  “I like the atmosphere here. It feels comfy.”

  “I have higher expectations than the pork restaurant, I do.”

  I sat down in an empty seat next to Lu and Yae. Before long, Fizz brought us all three glasses of cold water.

  “Here you are.”

  “Ah, thanks.”

  Huh. Little thing like you works as a waiter? Cute. Seems like kids in the Reverse World work just as hard as kids in the other one. Then again, it might just be because they have more free time. There’s no compulsory education like on Earth.

  “Now, time to order... Oh, where’s the menu?”

  I looked on the table, but there was nothing. There weren’t any menus affixed to the walls, and I couldn’t see anything else, either. That was a bit odd.

  “Umm... We don’t really have many menus, so... Just leave it to me! I’ll get you the best stuff!”

  Fizz nodded quickly and said she’d get our food.

  It seemed that ‘not a lot on the menu’ literally meant that they didn’t have many menus, rather than them being a specialty restaurant. I was a bit confused, though. Didn’t she say that her mom was the one who cooked the meals?

  “We’ll leave it to you, then.”

  “Sure thing! I
can handle it!”

  Fizz nodded and ran off to the kitchen. I wondered what kind of food we’d get.

  “There really are no customers, there are not...”

  “I’m not that surprised. They have such a popular, gaudy restaurant right across from them.”

  They were probably here before the Golden Pig was, and ended up losing customers as that tacky place gained more popularity.

  We were on the main street of the capital, so people would obviously come by and favor the more popular restaurant. Frankly, setting up shop like that right in front of these guys was meanspirited on the part of the Golden Pig owners.

  As I thought about that, Fizz reappeared and placed three plates down on the table.

  “Here you go!”

  ...What is this? Soup...? Pot-au-feu? There’s a lot of big veggies and sausage-like meat mixed in with the broth... This is definitely simple food, down to a T.

  I looked at Fizz, and she seemed a little anxious. ...C’mon, kid. Don’t pull that face.

  I scooped up some of the stew with my spoon and brought it to my mouth. What?!

  “...This is amazing.”

  “It is delicious, it is!”

  “Oh, how tasty!”

  Wh... What the hell?! How can it be this good?! I can’t even put it into words how good this is!

  I bit into the sausage, allowing the crunchy skin to give way to the softer meat inside. The wonderful flavor spread out across my mouth.

  The vegetables were fantastic, as were the potatoes. In no time at all, we had thoroughly devoured the pot-au-feu. It was unreasonably good... Far better than the meal we’d had at the Golden Pig, despite the smaller portion.

  “That was lovely, it was. The sausage was especially nice, it was...”

  “Oh! You liked it? It’s homemade!”

  Fizz smiled as she refilled my water. Dang, homemade? That’s really good.

  “The dish is simple, but the flavor was really brought out well. I’m certain only the best of cooks could have managed to make something like this, I must say I’m thoroughly impressed.”

  The meal had received the coveted Lu seal of approval. It was definitely tastier than the stuff served up at the other place, but that went without saying.

  “Thanks for your kind words, I’m happy to hear you were satisfied.”

  A woman in an apron came out from the kitchen. She was in her late twenties and had flax-colored hair. Her face vaguely resembled Fizz’s. This must have been her mother.

  “It tasted great. With food like this, I’m surprised you don’t have more patrons. The portion was a little small, too... Any reason?”

  Fizz frowned a little at my question.

  “We don’t have as many ingredients... The Golden Pig buys up everything from the market...”

  “They buy it all up? Seriously?”

  “There aren’t enough fresh vegetables or meat to go around because of them! Mom’s still doing what she can, but I dunno how long it’ll last...”

  I turned to Fizz’s mother, who was named Nina, and she explained that the Golden Pig had cornered the market and was starving the other local restaurants of ingredients. Apparently they were doing this deliberately, as they wanted to buy out the plots of land nearby and turn them into parking lots for Gollem carriages.

  The Golden Pig was hurting the market in general, and hindering sales for any and all competitors.

  Fizz and her mother had turned to growing their own veggies on their own land, but the yield was hardly enough to support a restaurant.

  Lu suddenly balled up her hand into a fist and slammed it down on the table.

  “I can’t forgive this! If they wanted to compete in terms of flavor, that would be one thing... But this is outrageous!”

  “I feel the same as Lu-dono, I do. This will not stand, it will not.”

  Lu and Yae looked over to me with fire blazing in their eyes. I agreed with them.

  “Touya! Can we handle this?”

  “Eh... I mean... Even if we got a lot of ingredients for these guys, I dunno if that’d be enough to get their customers back.”

  People weren’t dining at the Golden Pig for good food, they were just doing it for social status. It was a trendy place that people liked to talk about.

  Just as we were thinking about that, the door opened up and three people entered.

  “Welcome! Oh... You again? Didn’t we tell you that we’re not going to sell?”

  “It’s been a while since we last asked, ma’am. Just wondered if you might’ve changed your mind.”

  I was stunned. The huge, chubby man in the doorway wore dazzling clothing that glittered gold. Even his walking cane was golden... It was quite the sight to see. He stood with two crony-looking men standing behind him.

  It seemed like this gaudy man was the owner of the Golden Pig. His body certainly matched the name of his establishment.

  “I already told ya, ma’am. I’ll buy this restaurant for twenty pah-cent higher than the going rate! Yer gonna go outta business soon, sugar! Might as well sell high!”

  “I refuse. This place has sentimental value. It’s all I have left of my husband and father-in-law. I can’t sell it, no way.”

  Nina glared at the golden pig man. He just laughed at her in response.

  “No customers, doll! No sales! No profit! I don’t mind waiting, but yer just delaying the inevitable, ya know? Why make this hard on our customers? We need more parking spaces for our fancy-types, y’dig?”

  “Go away and leave us alone! It’s your fault anyway!” Fizz suddenly yelled at the golden pig. He just snorted loudly and started laughing again.

  “I don’t like little brats who don’t know when tah keep their mouths all shut-like. Not my fault you guys can’t compete, is it? That’s capitalism, baby! Well... doesn’t matter if you wait, the result’ll be the same in the end. We’re good to wait, so don’t worry about it. We’ll be here when ya come crawlin’, sugar.”

  “[Slip].”

  “Gwaugh?! Bwuh?”

  The golden pig suddenly fell on his ass, yelped in pain, and then rolled right out the door with his cronies following him. What a jerk...

  He was worse than that, honestly. I couldn’t stand people who treated children with such disdain. He just got what was coming to him.

  I looked over to Yae and Lu, and they smiled at me. I was glad we were thinking on the same wavelength.

  “Touya, I’d like to help this restaurant out. I don’t want to see a chef of this quality lose out.”

  “Indeed. I agree, I do. I do not want those unpleasant people to get their way, I do not.”

  Lu and Yae seemed resolved to help out Nina and her daughter. I felt the same way, honestly. When I saw that golden pig treating them so disrespectfully, I just wanted to knock his lights out.

  “Mister, are you guys okay?”

  “Just fine! There’s nothing we can’t do! Trust us!”

  Lu responded in my stead, patting little Fizz on the shoulder. I appreciated her enthusiasm, but she probably didn’t want to hit the kid too hard.

  “First thing to do is get you guys some ingredients. If we can’t trust the market, then we’ll just have to check out alternative options.”

  We weren’t going to let this store get bought out. It was true I had a lot of merchant friends back home, but I didn’t really have any here...

  In terms of merchants here... Well, the only guy I really knew was Mr. Sancho. He was a cheery guy, so I wondered if he’d be able to help.

  “If you’ve decided on a plan, then please hurry.”

  Yae and Lu decided to stay behind in case those jerks came back to harass people again. I didn’t really know what kind of tactics they could end up employing, so it was better to be safe than sorry. If Lu and Yae were there, then things would be a lot safer.

  I nodded to the girls and then used [Teleport], bringing me to Mr. Sancho.

  ◇　◇　◇

  “No way! That’s unforgivab
le!”

  “Please calm down, honey.”

  Mr. Sancho crossed his arms and yelled as his wife, Mona, tried to soothe his temper. As I’d expected, Mr. Sancho had heard of the Golden Pig before. He’d never eaten there, though.

  Apparently he had no idea that they’d been harassing other restaurants, and as my explanation increased, so did Mr. Sancho’s indignation.

  “In business, it’s fine if you win or lose based on sales, but cornering the market and not caring about your quality?! That’s unacceptable!”

  To be honest, if they hadn’t employed such underhanded means then they might have gradually won out in the long-run, but their controversial practices were clearly the result of impatience and laziness. It was righteous to find it offensive.

  “Alright, then! I’ll have my acquaintances prepare food supplies without going through the direct market routes.”

  “I appreciate it. I was kind of at a loss, to be honest...”

  The supplies would apparently come from Strain, which was good since I knew the queen.

  Still, that didn’t solve the main issue.

  “I’ll check out the merchant’s guild soon. It’s likely that there’s some corruption or conspiracy going on there to benefit senior staff who collaborate with the Golden Pig. I’ll have a full investigation launched, though it’ll take some time to find sufficient evidence.”

  It seemed that Mr. Sancho was a much more influential merchant than I had initially guessed. Well, it was less that he himself was powerful, and more that he had several powerful contacts. He even knew people in the knight order, so they’d have the cooperation of the government. I was pretty pleased by what I was hearing.

  Now all we had to do was help increase customers at the Little Bunny.

  I wanted to thank Mr. Sancho for his help, so I gave him some trinkets from Felsen. These included a cane that fired flames, a lightning sword, and a few other bits and pieces. I originally bought them to sell at a higher price, but I was kind of sick of lugging them around in my [Storage].