The Best Lines

by Nicole Pyland

  “Your point, Alyssa?”

  “If you’d never lost that job, you probably wouldn’t be together now.”

  CHAPTER 26

  Ember stocked beer at BBZ’s. Zack was busy bartending since his normal bartender had called off, and they were slammed due to the end of the school year and the students trying to pack in one last night of fun before they departed for the summer. Ember was sweating and had to pull her hair back before she rose from her kneeling spot on the floor where she was busy putting the bottles into the mini fridge under the bar. When she rose fully, she saw there were even more people crowded around the bar waiting to be served.

  She made drinks slower than Zack since it had been a while since she’d bartended, but she mixed the rum and cokes, screwdrivers, gin and tonics, and a few martinis for the older students or the younger ones who wanted to appear older. She popped beer bottles and poured drafts for close to three hours without ever really looking up, but then she caught someone she recognized in the corner and did a double take, partly, because she hadn’t seen her in months, and partly, because she looked completely different.

  Kayla DeWitt was at a side table with what looked like a few of the grad students Ember recognized from Eva’s class. Kayla looked thinner and not in the way that came from hours of working out, but in the way that made her look sickly. Her hair seemed different too. It was thinner and shorter. It also looked unkempt. She was dressed casually in a pair of jeans and tennis shoes with a button-down shirt, which wasn’t like the Kayla she remembered.

  She nodded to Zack in that brother/sister way where they understood one another without words, walked around the bar and headed toward the table. She wasn’t sure why she wanted to get closer. What she knew of Kayla she didn’t like, but there was something pulling Ember toward her.

  “Hey, Aubrey, right?” Ember greeted the girl to Kayla’s left.

  “Yeah, you’re Dr. Dash’s girlfriend.”

  “That’s me.” Ember turned. “Kayla?”

  “Ember, how are you?”

  “I’m good. You?”

  “I’m…okay,” Kayla hesitated. “So, you and Eva are an item?”

  “We are,” Ember said and hated that she felt good telling Kayla that.

  “I’m glad it all worked out then.” Kayla smiled at her and Ember thought that even her smile looked weak.

  “Well, I just wanted to say hi to Aubrey and the others. This is my brother’s place. I’m helping him out tonight. If you guys want a free round, stop by the bar and grab me.” She offered with a wave.

  A few minutes later, Ember looked up to find Kayla standing in front of her.

  “Here for that free round?” Ember asked.

  “Actually, I wanted to talk to you.”

  “Me?”

  “I heard Eva turned down the job, and now that I know you two are dating, I was hoping you could tell me why. Doug and I both wanted her back at the college. I know I was rude about the whole thing in the beginning. I regret that.” She paused, and Ember noticed her fingernails were growing out, which didn’t seem smart for a lesbian who was constantly chasing girls. She looked up to see that her eyes weren’t as bright as she remembered either. “I’ve regretted a lot of things lately. I guess that’s what dying does to a person.”

  “I’m sorry?” Ember wasn’t sure she’d heard that last part correctly.

  “Cancer. Eva didn’t tell you?”

  “No, she didn’t. How would she even know?”

  “Doug told her. I resigned. Doug and I both wanted her to take my position next semester. She turned it down today, though. He told me. Do you know why?”

  “No, I don’t.” Ember didn’t want to tell Kayla that Eva hadn’t told her about any of this. “And I’m sorry for-”

  “Don’t be. You and I both know you’ve never liked me.” Kayla winked at her.

  “True,” Ember said and smiled, “but still.”

  “I’ve got six months to a year according to my doctor, so I’m leaving. I’m going to spend some time with my family. My sister lives in Savannah in this old farmhouse. I’m going to stay with her and her husband. She has my niece and nephew. I’d like to spend some time with them. I’m going to relax and write. I want to enjoy what time I have left.”

  “Of course, that makes a lot of sense,” Ember told her solemnly.

  “I know Eva found something else. Doug told me she accepted a position at St. Mary’s, but I thought she’d want her old job back.”

  “I’ll talk to her. See what’s up,” Ember replied, but had no idea what Kayla was talking about.

  “I should get back. The grad students wanted to take me out for one last time before I leave.”

  “Let me get this round for you guys. What’s everyone drinking?” she asked.

  “They’re college students. So, they’ll have a round of Miller Lites. I’ll have a dry martini with extra olives if you don’t mind.”

  Ember smiled and began preparing their drinks.

  ◆◆◆

  When Ember got home from the long shift, she felt exhausted, but also energized because she’d made serious tip money that night thanks to people getting drunk and a lot of them apparently thinking she was the hot bartender. That usually happened when she worked alongside her brother. She laughed silently at that thought and then turned the shower to hot, so that she could get the smell of the bar off her body. She’d had beer dumped on her accidentally by some guy trying to impress some girl. She smelled like rancid alcohol now.

  She tossed her clothes in the laundry basket and climbed into the shower. The water stung her chilled body at first, but then she gave into it and allowed the warmth to carry her thoughts back to the conversation with Kayla. Apparently, Eva had been offered her old job, but had turned it down. Ember washed her hair as she contemplated why Eva would have done that. Ember knew Eva had never wanted to leave that job in the first place. When she finished scrubbing all remnants of the bar off her skin, she got out of the shower and dressed for bed. But after lying under the sheets for an hour, Ember yanked them off and made her way to the living room.

  ◆◆◆

  Eva woke up in Hannah and Alyssa’s guestroom. They’d been up late wedding planning the night before. There had been some drinking as well, and they’d asked her to stay since they didn’t want her driving home drunk. She’d heard them both wake, ready themselves for work together, and then leave. She’d heard their laughter, and she was pretty sure she’d heard a make-out session through her slightly opened door while they made breakfast. She missed her own girlfriend and the mornings they’d shared, but Ember had worked at the bar last night, so there wasn’t any point in either of them staying over.

  She lay around for a little while longer, enjoying the feeling of not having anywhere she needed to be. She put on the same clothes she wore the night before and headed back toward her own apartment. When she got there, she found her girlfriend standing in front of her stove cooking.

  “Em?” she asked.

  “Hey.” Ember turned to see her standing there. “Oh, sorry.” She pulled the headphones out of her ears and turned the phone off, pushing it aside on the counter. “I was listening to a podcast. I didn’t hear you come in. I’m making lunch.”

  “That’s sweet of you.”

  “Well, I figured you’d need some protein given the amount of alcohol you apparently drank last night. Nice text messages by the way.”

  “Oh, shit. I forgot I texted you.” Eva smacked her forehead.

  “Apparently, alcohol makes you horny. That’s good to know. I only wish I wasn’t busy at the bar because I definitely would have picked you up at Alyssa’s and taken you back here.”

  “Oh yeah?” Eva approached Ember and gently kissed her. “Maybe after lunch we can adjourn to my room.”

  “I might be able to make that happen for you,” Ember teased back. “But right now, I’m making us burgers. I also made you my favorite Cajun fries. Don’t tell my Italian mother that I
am a sucker for Cajun fries, but I found this brand at the store that’s pretty good when baked, so they’re in the oven.”

  “Do I have time for a quick shower?” Eva asked and wrapped Ember up in a hug.

  “Sure. I’ll have it on the table when you get done.”

  “Have I told you lately that you’re the best girlfriend in the world?” Eva smiled.

  “No, but thank you.”

  Eva kissed her again and then took off for the shower.

  A few minutes later, Ember finished plating the food and put the plates on the table. Eva came out of the bathroom with wet hair that she was still drying with a towel. She tossed the towel on the floor by the bedroom to deal with later and smiled at Ember as she sat in her chair wearing a t-shirt and shorts.

  “This looks great.” Eva stared down at the lunch Ember had prepared for her. “What are your plans for the day?” Eva asked and bit into a fry.

  “I thought we could make a decision on that apartment you really liked,” Ember said. “You were approved, right? We should pick a moving date, and I can add my info to the application.”

  “Right.” Eva looked down at the table and ate another fry.

  Ember recognized her hesitation now. What she’d seen before from Eva that had her concerned wasn’t that Eva wasn’t ready to take certain relationship steps with her. It was because Eva wanted to stay, but she knew Ember had just decided to go to Notre Dame.

  “We can wait. We have time, I guess.” Ember ate a fry of her own.

  “No, it’s good. We should do it now. Let’s get that going so we have one less thing to worry about.”

  “I love you,” Ember said out of nowhere.

  Eva looked up surprised.

  “I know. I love you too.”

  There was a moment where they just stared at one another. Ember could tell Eva was trying to figure something out.

  “Are you getting excited about starting the new job?”

  “Yeah, yeah.” Eva was lying. Ember could tell. “I’m ready to get started on the summer sessions first, I guess. I want to give them my full attention. The students deserve that.”

  “They do,” Ember agreed and bit down into her burger. “I was thinking that we should do some fun city stuff this summer since we’ll be moving. Hit all the museums, go to the beach, maybe go on one of those lame tourist walking tours just for fun. What do you think?”

  “Yeah!” Eva exclaimed. “The Field Museum has an exhibit on Terracotta Warriors. We should check that out. We could go to Millennium Park and just hang out. I could write, and you could listen to one of your podcasts. We could ride the Ferris wheel at Navy Pier. Do you know that’s where Alyssa proposed to Hannah?”

  Ember shook her head no and watched the smile on Eva’s face widen as she told her the story.

  “That’s a great proposal story.”

  “And we should probably go to at least one Cubs game with your dad. He did offer. I don’t want him to think I’m not interested. Who knows? Maybe I’ll like it.”

  “Maybe you will. There’s a game at home next Saturday. You want me to see if I can get us all tickets?” Ember asked.

  “Sounds good.”

  “It does,” Ember agreed.

  After they ate, Ember reviewed the Notre Dame paperwork while Eva looked over her articles. They sat side by side in Eva’s apartment, and Ember looked around the space instead of at her laptop. It was comfortable and they both fit there, but Ember felt like if Eva had more room in the place she lived, she’d likely fill it up with books like her old office. There would be one room that would just be for Eva and her books and maybe one room for Ember where she’d have at least two chalkboard walls and maybe more. She’d have space to work on her equations. Eva would have space to read and get work done. While Eva had been adamant about not wanting to buy a house, Ember decided just to look around a little online to see if she could find something interesting. It was also a bit of a delay tactic because she no longer had this drive to fill out the paperwork for the school she’d been so excited to attend not that long ago.

  Eva’s legs were in Ember’s lap. The computer she was using rested atop them, so Ember could do some research without Eva seeing exactly what she was researching. She went to a real estate website, entered some criteria, and started looking at pictures. After about an hour of them each working in comfortable silence, she’d bookmarked five properties that were of interest to her.

  “There. Done,” Eva proclaimed and closed her laptop.

  Ember turned to her and closed her own just in case Eva decided to sit up and take a look at her screen. She felt like she was watching porn and didn’t want her girlfriend to know. She laughed silently at herself.

  “Done?”

  “Yeah, I sent both articles off to journals. Now, I wait.”

  “Wait for them to publish your stuff?”

  “No, wait to see if they even want to publish my stuff. It’s not a guarantee. I just had the time and wanted to put it out there to see. It helps with tenure.”

  “St. Mary’s is offering you tenure, right?” Ember asked and placed her laptop on the table before leaning back against the sofa and nodding in Eva’s direction.

  Eva removed her own laptop enabling Ember to lie down next to her on the couch. They lay facing one another now with Ember’s arm protectively wrapped around Eva to prevent her from falling off the couch.

  “I’ll be on a tenure track, yes,” Eva replied, and Ember watched her eyes again.

  It was so obvious to her now why Eva had been acting so strangely about their upcoming move.

  “And once you have tenure, you’re basically tied to that place, right?” Ember pressed.

  “It’s smart to stay there since you basically can’t be fired. Some people leave one university for another, but most stay because it’s the smart thing to do.”

  Ember rubbed up and down Eva’s back and wondered if she’d really be entirely happy at St. Mary’s now that her old job was a possibility. She’d turned it down already, but Ember doubted they’d found someone that quickly.

  “Smart thing to do,” Ember repeated and kissed Eva’s lips.

  “Did you finish your paperwork for school?”

  “Almost.” Ember wasn’t completely lying.

  “Do you want me to order something for dinner or-”

  “I’m having dinner with Charlie and Hailey,” Ember said. “You should come with us.” She smiled at her.

  “No, you guys hang out. Don’t you have a no significant others allowed rule?”

  Ember chuckled against Eva’s neck.

  “That only applies to coffee.”

  “Good to know,” Eva said.

  “Do you want to come to dinner with us? We can celebrate your article accomplishment.” She kissed her neck.

  “No, I think I’ll stay in and catch up on some reading.”

  Ember pulled back.

  “You’re going to re-read something you’ve read a million times, aren’t you?”

  “It’s likely.” Eva smiled.

  “Can I come over after?”

  “Stay the night?” Eva asked with an eyebrow lift.

  “That’s the idea.”

  “Bring stuff and you can stay for as long as you want.”

  “Oh, yeah?” Ember kissed her neck again.

  “Yes, I like having you around.” Eva moved Ember’s lips to her own.

  “That’s good since we’ll be living together soon.” Ember kissed her again.

  “Yeah.” The eyes changed again. Ember now hated that she could so easily see Eva’s transition from happy and excited to less than excited. “I’ll call the leasing office and tell them to change the application to two tenants. I don’t think it will be a problem.”

  “Okay.” Ember kissed her forehead. “I should get going so I’m not late.”

  Eva kissed Ember again and then felt Ember move over her for a moment while she tried to escape the couch. Ember took advantage of her positi
on and kissed Eva’s neck for a few more minutes. She kissed Eva one last time on the lips before practically flying off the couch and nearly toppling over the side. Eva cackled at this and remained there until Ember had her things in hand, leaned down to plant another kiss on her lips, and left the apartment.

  ◆◆◆

  “Wait a minute. Now, I’m confused,” Charlie interrupted Ember’s telling of the story. “Now she wants to stay here, and you want to go?”

  “Basically,” Ember stated. “I’m sort of rethinking it now.”

  “I’m sorry?” Hailey downed a gulp of her wine.

  “I never looked into schools in Chicago because I knew she wasn’t staying in Chicago. It was stupid of me not to, but I didn’t. When I found out about her getting the call from her old college, I stayed up all night running new numbers.”

  “My God, Ember!” Charlie exclaimed.

  “What?” Ember was confused. “It’s hard to explain, but it’s like I need the math to validate the feelings.”

  “Validate?”

  “I know I want to be with her. I want her to be happy. I wanted to go to Notre Dame, but as I thought about her reaction to St. Mary’s and the move, I can see that she took the job because she needed the job. It wasn’t because she wanted to leave Chicago. She’s less happy when she talks about it than she is when she talks about what we’ll do this summer in the city.” She paused and took a breath. “I can go to school anywhere.”

  “I thought you wanted either MIT or Notre Dame.”

  “Evanston isn’t that far from the city.”

  “Northwestern?” Hailey brightened at the mention of her alma mater.

  “I set up a campus tour for next week. I’m not telling Eva yet because if I don’t like it, I don’t want to get her hopes up. I really do want to find the right school for me. I know that if I choose a place that’s wrong just to be with her, that won’t end well for us. I’m trying to use my brain and my heart.”

  “I think it’s great. Northwestern is a great school,” Hailey said.