A Symphony of Howls

by Val St. Crowe

  Why was I blushing? “Shut up. Go away.”

  “No,” he said. “And I’m not going to fight you either. Look, I shouldn’t have barged in here before and tried to carry you off against your will. I realize now that’s not going to work. You’re too stubborn for your own good.”

  “Okay, you realize it’s not going to work. And so you’re back because…?”

  “I figured I needed to try a different approach.”

  “You need to give up.”

  “Ehh, that’s not really my style.” He crossed his arms over his chest.

  “Landon, I’m not leaving the pack.”

  “You’re only saying that because you’ve got that mating bond thing going on, and if that was broken—”

  “No, I can’t break it.”

  “I could kill the dog,” said Landon. “I’m pretty sure that would work.”

  “You’re not killing him.” I put both of my hands on my hips.

  He sighed. “Could we talk?”

  “We are talking.”

  “I mean…” He gestured to the two easy chairs angled toward the fire. “Could we sit down and have a proper conversation?”

  “I need you to leave. Last time you were here, Tempest saw you, and she told everyone in town, and she’s probably stalking the house now, and she probably saw you again, and then it’s going to be worse.”

  “Look, any relationship that means you have to give up your old friends isn’t a healthy one.”

  “You’re not my friend.”

  “Oh, wow.” He clutched his chest. “That hurt.”

  “Come on, Landon.” I glared at him.

  He pushed off from the door frame. He sauntered over to me and slid a hand onto the small of my back.

  Shivers traveled up my spine and over my shoulders, reaching down my torso. “Stop touching me,” I said, breathless.

  He gently guided me across the room and gestured to one of the easy chairs.

  “Landon…”

  He sat down, resting his foot on his knee, looking comfortable.

  I sighed. I sat down too. “Okay, fine. Make it quick.”

  “I don’t know about that. I want to tell you a story.”

  “Are you joking?”

  “No, I’m not joking. Do I seem like the kind of person who would joke?”

  “Actually…”

  “Don’t answer that,” he said. “This is a story about a little boy named Landon. Well, okay, a teenage boy named Landon. A handsome, smart, and strong teenage boy, with a heart of gold.”

  “Seriously?” I glowered at him.

  “You might not know this about me,” he said, “but I grew up in a werewolf pack.”

  “You did? You’re a werewolf?”

  “I’m a bloodhound. You can’t forget that, can you? It’s pretty obvious when you look at me.” He bared his sharp teeth.

  I recoiled in spite of myself.

  “I think I know what you mean, though,” he said. “No, I was never a werewolf. I was a human member of the pack. My father was a werewolf, but he had chosen not to mate with another werewolf and instead to marry a human, my mother. There was still a chance that either my sister or I would be called and that a latent werewolf gene might be triggered, but it didn’t happen for either of us.”

  “You have a sister.”

  “Had a sister.”

  “Oh,” I said. “I’m sorry.”

  He didn’t meet my gaze. Instead, he studied one of his hands. He let his claws out and retracted them. “Her name was Jenna. She was younger than me by two years. When the attack happened, my father made us hide in our basement, and he shifted to go and fight the bloodhounds.”

  “Wait, your pack was attacked?”

  “We were terrified. My sister was only sixteen. She was clinging to my mother and sobbing, and I think my mother would have been crying too if she didn’t have someone to try to calm down. I kept trying to keep Jenna quiet too. I was afraid they’d hear. I didn’t know that it didn’t matter if we were quiet or not. I didn’t know that they could smell us. I really didn’t know anything about bloodhounds.”

  I bit down on my lip. “Landon, I really am sorry. I had no idea—”

  “They tore them apart in front of me,” he said. “They killed my mother and my sister, and they made me watch, and I only got away because they got so excited by the carnage that they stopped paying attention to me and I ran.”

  I didn’t know what to say.

  He looked into the fire. His voice was softer now, and he didn’t seem like himself anymore, as if all his layers of cocky bitterness had been shaved off. “I ran and ran, but they caught me. They’d spent their rage by then, and they were back to their rational selves, and they took me in with the remaining survivors to be blood slaves to the vampires. You know how many of us survived?”

  I shook my head.

  “Seven,” he said. “Our village population was probably fifteen hundred people. They killed everyone.”

  “Oh, Landon, that’s awful.” My heart went out to him. I wanted to touch him, to comfort him. I reached over and laid my hand on his forearm. It was covered in fur, and I had expected it to be coarse, but it was soft and fine. I let out a funny little surprised sound.

  His eyes met mine. He looked startled.

  I yanked my hand away. I hadn’t been… petting him, had I? I hadn’t meant to. I looked away.

  He cleared his throat. “Uh, the point is, Camber, you aren’t safe here. If it comes down to a fight between the bloods and your pack, your pack will lose. You’re the alpha. You’ll be on the front lines. You’ll be one of the first to die.”

  My lips parted. I didn’t know what to say.

  “I really don’t want you to die,” he said.

  “We have a protection spell,” I said finally, even though it seemed like arguing with him was obscene after the story he’d told me.

  “Those things are not infallible. You think my pack didn’t have protection enchantments? The bloods found their way through. And your spell is weak. I told you it was. It’s not going to keep out a determined group of bloods. The only reason they haven’t come for you already is that they don’t know where you are. If they find you—”

  “What makes you think they will? Are you going to tell them?”

  “Are you crazy? You saw me kill bloodhounds, didn’t you? They are not my friends. They’ll take me back to the vampires, and I’m done working for anyone.”

  “Well, then, what makes you think they’re going to find my pack? They haven’t found them thus far, have they?”

  “Because it’s their job to scour the woods looking for werewolves. That’s what they do. It’s what they were built for. So, it might not be next week. It might not even be next month. But eventually, they will find their way in here, and they will kill you. And if that happens, I…” He took a deep breath. An then he met my gaze again. His blue eyes flashed. “I won’t let you die. I’ll do anything to keep you from dying.”

  “Landon…” I was drowning in his eyes. I should look away, but I couldn’t. I was thinking about kissing Judah, except it wasn’t Judah, it was Landon, and I was wondering if it was possible to kiss around those sharp teeth of his and I was wondering if his fur covered all of his body or if there were places that were… bare, and I felt too warm, and my dress was snug, and I couldn’t catch my breath.

  “Yes?” He was whispering.

  “I’m not your responsibility.” I was whispering too.

  “That’s the thing. You are. I’m making you my responsibility. I’m going to look after you. I have to.”

  With effort, I tore my gaze away from his. I looked into the fire. “Fine. You do whatever you want. But I’m not leaving. This is my home. I’ve never had a home before. You don’t understand.”

  “No, I do,” he said. “I had a home too. But it’s gone now. Forever.”

  “And you fought for it,” I said.

  “I couldn’t fight for it. I was a human kid
, and I ran. If I could have fought, maybe Jenna… maybe my mom…”

  “I’m sorry. Of course you couldn’t fight. Of course it wasn’t your fault—”

  “If I’d known what could happen, I would have taken Jenna and run. Maybe I couldn’t have convinced my mother and father, but I would have got my sister out. You don’t know what it’s like to be killed by a bloodhound. They like to rip things up, but when the rage is them, they don’t know what they’re doing, so they don’t necessarily, uh, kill quickly. Sometimes it takes a really long, painful time before…” He couldn’t finish the sentence.

  I couldn’t imagine how horrible it must have been to watch his mother and sister meet such an awful end. I really felt for him.

  “That’s not happening to you,” he said, and he was looking at me with those hauntingly blue eyes again.

  “I can’t give up my home,” I said. “I can’t. I will never leave this place willingly. And if you drag me away, I will fight you until I get free, and I will come back here. Always and forever until you give up.”

  He made a face. “Well, I’m not going to give up.”

  “You should,” I said.

  * * *

  I waited for someone to report back to Judah that Landon had been there, but no one did, and I was glad.

  Not only because I hadn’t told Judah about Landon again, but because it meant that maybe Tempest wasn’t stalking me anymore. Maybe she was getting better with what had happened between her and Judah, and she was willing to accept the status quo.

  I knew that I should have told Judah, but I couldn’t find the words. Maybe it was because I was having to admit that I had some kind of strange attraction to Landon. It was odd, because he was a bloodhound, and he shouldn’t be attractive, and yet he was. Also, he was so single-mindedly dead set on protecting me, and that made me feel a little weak-kneed. Not that I needed protection. I was an alpha werewolf. I was strong in my own right. It didn’t even make any sense for me to like anything about Landon. It was all stupid.

  Which was why I tried not to think about it.

  The dance was coming up.

  I thought about that instead.

  I almost told Sinead about Landon, but I thought she would just be disappointed. What kind of story would that be? Girl mates to hunky werewolf and then falls for beastman who she can never have? That’s a terrible story. It sounded super depressing.

  Maybe my life was just depressing. Maybe I’d be better off admitting that to myself and getting over it.

  Finally, the night of the dance arrived. I curled my hair the old fashioned way, by putting it up in rollers in the morning before breakfast and leaving the curlers in all day. When it was evening, I took out my rollers and let my curly hair fall down my back. I put on my dress and I came out into the living room where Judah was waiting for me.

  He smiled when he saw me, but he didn’t look dazzled. He didn’t even look me up and down like Landon had. He definitely didn’t say that I look like a princess. He didn’t say anything at all, just asked if I was ready. He said we were going to be late.

  I tried not to be disappointed. I shouldn’t have put so much pressure on a dress. It was only a dress. There was no way it was going to make him forget Tempest, the only other woman he’d ever kissed.

  Blood and fangs.

  We walked across town to the barn where the dance was being held. Inside, there were rows of hanging fire baskets, which provided light and heat, since it was a chilly winter evening. There was a group of musicians in the corner. They were strumming banjos and making fiddles sing, and they played jaunty tunes through the night. People were already dancing, but Judah and I didn’t join them yet.

  Instead, we went to the refreshment tables and got some little sandwiches and ham and apple cheese wraps and hard cider. The cider had been brewed right there on the premises, and it was sweet and strong. It only took a few glasses before I was feeling loose and happy. We finally took to the dance floor then.

  It was a speedy tune, and Judah and I held hands and skipped back and forth across the dance floor, laughing together. He twirled me around, and I giggled, and we had great fun. We continued dancing for three or four more dances like that, and I was having a good time. I felt close to him, but it was a kind of big-brother closeness. He still felt like family. I wasn’t the least bit attracted to him. Even though he was attractive, it was as though his attractiveness was affecting me less and less.

  It was like when one of your friends dates a guy who’s really hot, and you don’t want to want him, and then—as you get to know him—you stop being attracted to him, because your brain takes him out of the attractive slot. That was happened to Judah, and I hadn’t meant to take him out of that slot. I was supposed to be falling in love with him. He was my mate.

  Damn it.

  Suddenly, they started to play a slow song, and we both were startled. We looked at each other with wide, afraid eyes.

  But Judah seized me around the waist and pulled me tight against him, and I wrapped my arms around his neck.

  He laughed again. “We could use a chance to catch our breath.”

  “Yes,” I said, giggling.

  We looked into each other’s eyes for a moment, but then looked away.

  We swayed to the slower music.

  I was conscious of the fact that our bodies were touching, but it didn’t feel sexual at all. He was pack. He was my brother. I felt as though we could sleep in a pile of bodies with others, like a litter of puppies. It would be warmth and togetherness and safety. It would be love. It was love. But it wasn’t…

  I wasn’t sure I was ever going to feel for Judah what a woman should feel for a mate.

  Panic was cutting through me. I didn’t know what I was going to do. Could I live like this? Could I have a mate with whom I never truly bonded?

  Judah kissed me.

  I wasn’t expecting it, and I almost pulled away, but I slammed my eyes shut and forced myself to kiss back. I knew that we were supposed to be making everyone think that we were in love. There was nothing wrong with the kiss. It was wet and warm and exuberant. It made me feel that I belonged with Judah, here in the pack, as a partner, an equal, and a friend. It just… there wasn’t anything else to the kiss.

  When it was over, he pulled back and gave me a wistful look, as if the kiss hadn’t been what he had hoped for either.

  But it must have looked good, because everyone at the dance started whooping and applauding. And then both Judah and I blushed, which looked good too, but I was pretty sure we both did it because we were embarrassed about leading everyone on.

  The song ended, and Judah and I left the dance floor. I felt as though our work there was done, and maybe that was going to be enough for everyone.

  Judah asked if I wanted some more cider, but I was plenty tipsy by that point, and I thought I’d rather not drink more and end up drunk. I didn’t have a lot of experience with being even this tipsy. I was frightened of being very drunk, frightened of losing control. It didn’t seem like a smart thing to do as a werewolf, anyway, especially not as an alpha.

  I told him I would have some water, however.

  He went off to get it for me.

  But before he could get to the table, I saw someone streak through the barn, running as quickly as she could. I thought it was a woman, anyway. The person was moving too fast to be sure.

  I started for Judah, too, because I could sense the emotion of this person, and there was panic radiating off her.

  I arrived just as she reached Judah.

  He could sense her emotions too. “Lissa,” he said. “What’s wrong?”

  “It’s Tempest,” she said. “Come with me. It’s bad.”

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  All the blood drained from Judah’s face. “What do you mean? What happened?”

  “Just come,” said the woman, who must have been Lissa. She turned and hurried back through the crowd, heading for the door.

  Judah went after he
r, and I went after Judah.

  Now, the crowd seemed to have noticed that something was wrong. They parted, letting us through, and I could hear a ripple of conversation going through them. I could also feel the confusion from those that were werewolves.

  The night air was chilly when we burst through the doors. I had a coat, but I’d left it hanging inside. I didn’t think I could go back for it.

  Instead, we plunged into the woods, Lissa leading the way. She was running, and Judah was sprinting after her. I struggled to keep up because of my skirts. I had to hold them out of the way to run properly. I hurried after them as quickly as I could.

  The moon overhead was a white sliver, and the tree branches were bare and dead. The cold sliced into my skin. I ran and I shivered.

  Finally, Lissa stopped. Judah did too.

  I almost ran into him, but he caught me, and that was when I realized that the ground gave way just ahead of us.

  There was a steep cliff and gully beneath.

  Down, down, down at the bottom was Tempest’s body. She lay on her back with her blond hair splayed out around her. Her leg was bent up beneath her at an unnatural angle.

  Judah let out a noise. It sounded almost like a whimper.

  “We need a rope!” I said. “We can’t haul her up out of there without—”

  “I brought something.” Lissa was out of breath. Now I saw that she had a bag slung over her shoulder, and she was taking a coil of rope out of it. “I went and got it before I got you.”

  “Did she…” Judah was having trouble putting words together. “Did she do this on purpose? She hurt herself?”

  “No,” said Lissa. “It was an accident. I swear. We were walking, and we didn’t see the drop off.”

  Was Lissa telling the truth? I couldn’t be sure. Maybe Tempest had been so despondent that she’d tried to kill herself. Maybe she hadn’t had anything worth living for.

  I had heard of people being so in love that they did that kind of thing. Like Romeo and Juliet, I guess. But I couldn’t quite imagine it. I couldn’t see how dying did anyone any kind of good. What about her family? How would they feel with her gone? She shouldn’t have done this.

  Maybe it was an accident. Maybe—