Forsaken

by Jacquelyn Frank

  “He is correct.” The arguing men whipped about to look at Kamenwati. He was standing in the parlor entryway, leaning a shoulder against the wall. “We do not Blend. Even now, in spite of the terms I have come to, I have very little awareness of the original soul inside me. He has been beaten down so often, my soul overshadowing his, that I don’t think we could ever easily reverse it…that we could ever Blend us after so much time. There are times when the host soul ‘leaks’ out past our more dominant souls, but it’s more like a prison break than it is the flip side of the same coin.”

  “Then that settles it.” Leo turned to Grey who had remained quiet and observant all of this time. “Grey, I know what that wish is. The one you said was waiting for me.”

  “Careful,” Jackson hissed, unable to help himself. “Leo, please…”

  “I wish,” Leo repeated, “for the Bodywalker soul, Chatha, to be ejected from Andy’s body and sent back into the Ether indefinitely. Once Chatha’s soul is purged, I want Andy’s soul to remain and I want his memories of all that has happened since Chatha took possession of him to be completely erased so that he doesn’t have to suffer with the memories of what Chatha has done. I wish all of this to be done without killing Andy. I want him to be able to lead a normal life once he is free.”

  Grey took a deep breath and released it in a slow sigh. “That’s a very…complex wish,” Grey noted.

  “Can you do it?” Leo asked, his tone hard and his determination evident.

  “There will be—”

  “A price to pay. Yes, I know. Can you do it?”

  Grey smiled a very devilish sort of smile. “I’m the Djynn of the Western states who owns a flatulent Pegasus. I can do damn near anything.”

  Faith opened her eyes, groaned at the heavy weight pressing down on her chest and rolled over. She didn’t move more than a half an inch before pain blossomed through her body from several different locations.

  “Ow,” she whimpered piteously.

  “Shh,” came the warm rumbling sound of Leo’s voice up against her ear. “Don’t move too much. Grey said you lost too much blood to properly regenerate using your natural healing abilities. It’ll be another day or two before you can start getting around.”

  “How’s Andy?” she asked suddenly, her eyes flying open so she could look into the warm brown of his concerned gaze. He was lying in bed with her, holding her snugly to the right side of his body. She sighed with contentment at the intimate feel of him, at how close it made her feel with him.

  “It worked,” he assured her, knowing exactly what she meant. She had asked him about it every time she’d woken up since he’d told her about the wish. Apparently every time she fell asleep she thought she had only dreamed it all up. “Andy is a very normal, very stable Down syndrome adult male. Actually”—he cleared his throat—“he’s a really cool kid. Completely different than I had expected. I guess I’d expected him to be more like the farce Chatha used to reel his victims in. He’s actually quite bright and very mature. I only wish—”

  “What is it? What’s wrong?” she asked when she saw him frown darkly.

  “I wish I didn’t feel the way his face still makes me feel. No matter how much I try to explain to myself that Chatha is gone, every time I see Andy’s face I’m…I still feeling this choking fear…”

  “Give it some time,” Faith soothed him softly, her warm hand reaching out to pet his arm. “You can’t expect yourself to just shrug all of your trauma off. Andy’s face is a trigger. It’s going to bring a lot of memories up for a very long time. You might not ever be able to develop a long-term relationship with Andy.”

  “I don’t want a long-term relationship with anyone, believe me. I am going to find a good place for him that’s as far away from this deadly circus as possible.”

  Faith quieted significantly, enough for him to sense it.

  “Are you okay?” he asked.

  “You’re right. This is no place for an innocent human to be,” she said quietly. “And it’s best that you stay as far from the dangers of this place as you can possibly manage.”

  Leo was quiet for several beats of time. “I plan to,” he said. “I’m not an idiot, Faith, I know when I’m outgunned. I’ve got a life to get back to…there are things I can do out in the human world…I can help better out there if I stay away from here.”

  “Then you should go as soon as your responsibilities to Jackson are over,” she said, refusing to let even a hint of hurt reflect into her voice. She rolled over, away from him, and pretended to snuggle back into sleep.

  “Faith, I…I hope we’re okay. I mean…we’re from such different worlds and…you have to remember what Grey showed us, that it’s no longer a possibility. Things have changed and…”

  “It’s okay,” she lied, squeezing her eyes shut tightly against the tears burning into them. “I know what you’re saying. It’s a different future now. I knew that all along. I mean, you said it yourself, you’d never even consider…”

  “No, I wouldn’t,” he agreed. “Even if you were a human female, Faith, I am no good at long-term relationships. Hell, I’m not even good at short-term ones.”

  “I know,” she said softly. “Leo, I’m exhausted.”

  “Okay,” he said, but something sat uneasy with him and he hesitated from moving off the bed. He wanted to prod at her, to make sure she understood his perspective, to make sure she wasn’t…hurt, but he could tell she was still wiped out. And anyway, he had no real right to ask her for anything. He never really had.

  Like he had said, even if she’d been human, he really sucked at relationships. Hell, the only reason Jackson and Docia put up with him was because they’d been anesthetized against his stupidity. They were more like family, and family had to take you in, flaws and all.

  Realizing Faith had fallen asleep, Leo got up off the bed and looked around the room. There was hardly anything there outside of a couple of pairs of borrowed jeans and shirts in the room. He’d be giving those back to Jackson. He’d had nothing when he’d got there and would leave with nothing. It was his favorite way to live. No roots, no encumbrances. Even the gun lying on the nightstand wasn’t his.

  He looked at Faith’s sleeping face. She wasn’t his either. She was yet another thing he’d borrowed from this strange path he’d been put on, and like everything else she would be left behind. As always, it was for the best.

  He wished he could leave right then, rather than a month from now. He was afraid the longer he lingered near Faith the harder it would be when it came time to say goodbye. The longer he lingered the worse it would get. Faith was so remarkable, so damn special…he had to admit it was tempting to toy with the what-ifs of life. But that had never served him well. No. He had to keep a distance. Always.

  Leo had done a stellar job of avoiding her. She’d been healed now for the past week, so it wasn’t as though he had the excuse of her injuries for keeping himself away from her. She could only assume he was thoroughly in the process of putting distance between them. It stung her. Even that moment, it stung tears into her eyes just thinking about it. She had thought that at least…at least he might want to take advantage of this last month. She would have happily lingered for the rest of the month, using the excuse of reinforcing their auras or further defending the house as perfectly plausible reasons for hanging around.

  But there was no reason for her to stay, she was realizing. He was taking all of her reasons away, and he was doing it on purpose.

  He hadn’t even come back to the room he’d been using, the one she’d been healing in, since she’d been well enough to get up out of bed. Faith turned her face up to the wind that was blowing over the New Mexico desert and knew he was inside the house. Of course he was. If she was in, he went out, if she was out, he went in. Without fail he would know where she was and how to avoid her. It was as though he were the one with the preternatural senses.

  She had to leave. Yes. She had to leave. Her father would be wondering where sh
e’d gone. He’d want to know how she’d fared. There were a million responsibilities awaiting her and she was letting them all slide just so she could linger around someone who, clearly, wanted nothing to do with her.

  So fine. She’d go. She’d strip off yet another borrowed dress and stretch her wings and…go.

  She turned and marched off the porch, ready to find Jackson and Marissa, ready to gather her tattered pride up and hold her head high, rather than embarrassing herself any more than she already had. She rushed through the door and slammed right into someone.

  Leo. Somehow he’d gotten his wires crossed and had actually made the mistake of running into her. His hands circled around her upper arms, holding her tight to help her regain her balance. A look of concern creased over his face. “Are you okay?” he asked.

  She knew that he was afraid he’d hurt her since she was still fresh off her injuries.

  Her laugh was caustic.

  “Oh no, Leo, you haven’t hurt me at all.”

  Wow. Subtle Faith, really subtle.

  But instead of arguing with her, instead of calling her on it and reiterating why his way was the best way, he frowned deeply and even a little bit darkly. His whiskey- warm eyes were hard and fierce, the expression in them unreadable for several beats. Then, as if he couldn’t help himself, his gaze dropped.

  To her mouth.

  And lingered.

  It made Faith’s heart turn over in her chest. He wanted her. It was scrawled across his scroll in fiery brilliance. He wanted her. If for no other reason than the physical, he wanted her.

  And dammit, she would take what she could get.

  She surged up on her toes and crashed their mouths together so hard it should have hurt. And in a way it did. It hurt in poignant, painful ways. Even as heat seared through her, it was a bitter heat, just as consuming as all the other times before when he had kissed her, but painful because in her heart she knew it would be the last time. And that was good. She would pay closer attention this time, now that she knew it was going to be the last. She would remember everything. The way his hands tightened briefly as he considered pushing her away, and then relaxed, just as his mouth went from passive to aggressive against hers. They were on each other like ravenous wolves from that point on. Their mouths remained connected, even as their hands fumbled at each other’s clothing and their feet stumbled toward the nearest private room. It was a small sitting room at the front of the house, no locks on the door, no hope for secure privacy. But it didn’t matter. Not when she could feel his hot callused hands running up her thighs under her skirt. He was looking for panties, but then laughed when he didn’t find any, having forgotten he was lucky she was even wearing a dress. Or maybe he was unlucky at that point, because he was determined to get the dress off her.

  She went for his belt, the jingle of the buckle sounding noisy even over their breathing. She was naked by the time she got his fly open. He fished in his back pants pocket for something—a wallet, she realized. It was light, and new, probably didn’t hold anything at all in it, but he did come up with a condom, tossing the wallet onto the ground.

  She hesitated only for a second, trying to figure out how she should feel about him being prepared like this. Had he been hoping…?

  No. She wasn’t going to think. This was about feeling, not thinking. It was about holding on to memories, however fast and furtive they were going to be.

  “Let me do it,” she breathed, holding her hand out for the plastic packet.

  Leo found himself hesitating, wondering how the hell he had ended up in this place again. He’d been so determined to give her a wide berth. He’d been hoping, waiting like a coward, for her to just give up on him and leave, but now by doing this he was taking away any headway he might have been making. She was going to think there was going to be more between them when there just couldn’t be. He should stop right then and there and tell her he was sorry, that it was just a huge mistake. All of it had been just a huge mistake. But he found himself placing the packet in her hand.

  She used her teeth to rip it open then slid the whole of her free hand down the front of his pants, her strong fingers wrapping around his erection one by one until he was groaning and cursing deeply. And just like that they were back onto each other’s mouths with tremendous ferocity. Her lips were so damn soft, her tongue like sinfully hot silk. Her fist rolled up the length of his cock, the sensation like lightning straight to the heart of him. His balls ached as if he’d never had her, as if she’d spent this past week teasing him. And in a way she had. She had been in his every thought, worrying at him like Chinese water torture, wearing away at him little by little whether she knew it or not, whether he tried to tell himself otherwise or not.

  “Jesus Christ, put it on me already so I can be inside you,” he said hotly, gripping at her hip. Then, as if she was forcing him to play dirty, he slid away from her hip and burrowed right between her legs. She gasped in a loud, wide breath and stepped to the side, opening herself up to his invasion. And invade he did. He didn’t waste time with a single nicety, as it were, he thrust two fingers right into her, the meat of his palm pressing against her clitoris as he began to thrust them deeply inside of her again and again and again.

  “Oh,” she laughed breathlessly. “So that’s how you want to play?”

  “Yeah, that’s how I play,” he agreed, this time twisting his hand when he thrust into her. She moaned, her eyes fluttering closed for a moment, her body weight dropping down to meet the thrust of his burrowing fingers.

  Then suddenly it was all her weight on his hand and he was forced to remove it or snap his wrist. And that was how she came to be on her knees before him, her hands dragging down his jeans before reclaiming her hold on his cock and, before he could even register it was happening, put him into the hot haven of her mouth.

  “Oh Jesus Mary and Joseph,” he ground out, his hand driving into the cotton white of her hair and fisting tightly. He looked down at her just as she looked up, and he could see the wickedness of her sexual confidence. She knew exactly what kind of hold she had on him right then, and she was going to milk it, and him, for everything he was worth. He felt her swallow around him, felt her run her tongue over that sensitive spot at the base of his cockhead that she had found the first and only night they had made love. She wasn’t pulling any punches, and the sudden increasing draw on him made it abundantly clear.

  “No! No! Jesus!” He swore in Spanish and English, respectively, and she laughed, a vibration he felt right down the length of his shaft. He gripped her by her chin and pulled himself away, probably with ease because she was laughing. And with eyes dancing she held up the condom and stretched it out over his engorged penis.

  “Now up,” he commanded of her, dragging her up as though she might not obey. But she was on the same page and with a lunge that put her up on her toes and then, after he reached down for her thighs, had her wrapping her legs high around his waist, she guided him into her eager body, pressing down on him bit by bit, both of them exclaiming in sounds of need as he advanced in one movement…two…and then finally was seated deep inside her. Then he grabbed hold of her hip with one hand and the wall with the other and began to meet her thrust after thrust after thrust. They probably should have checked the pleasured moans escaping them, but it simply didn’t matter to them. They were in the moment for the sake of the moment and not caring about anything else.

  And it was because of that focus that they could forget about what might happen. It was because of that focus that they could give in to the wild pleasure coursing through them on such a primal level. He surged into her again and again, as if he were looking to reach a core of her she didn’t know she had. Leo couldn’t have felt more aroused than he already was. There was no level of excitement beyond this. Not even when riding on the edge of danger, not even when he risked his life, betting it against the worst of odds. Only then had he ever felt truly alive, but in this moment, with the electrical sensation of her run
ning through him, this outshone it by far. This was what being alive felt like.

  And he never wanted it to end. But the end was coming faster every second. He ought to have slowed down a little, savored it a little, but he couldn’t help himself and only went faster and harder the closer the climax came. And then, just like that, he shot over the crest, pleasure ripping through him as he burst inside of her, the glory of the moment dragging everything he had into the orgasm.

  His knees gave way and they slid down the wall together, Faith resting in his lap, head thrown back, gasping for breath. Leo realized with shock that he didn’t even know if she had come.

  “Did you…?” he asked frantically.

  “What? Oh! Yes,” she laughed breathlessly. “Yes. Very much so.”

  “Oh. Good.” He chuckled. He had completely lost his head. And as he came to better awareness of the world around him, he realized where they were, what they had sounded like, and what the odds were that they had been overheard.

  Jesus, what had gotten into him? He’d been avoiding her at all costs, but even running into her like that, he would never have expected it to end like this. But she had kissed him and that had been the end to all of his rational thought.

  Just a single kiss and he’d been utterly lost.

  Faith could see him working out things in his head, and as he did, tension returned to his body. She could see the writing on the wall…and on his scroll. He was realizing what a mistake this had just been. That it had ruined his plans, whatever those might be. All she knew was that his plans didn’t include her.

  “Wow,” she said, forcing her legs to work and hauling herself up off him, trying not to react to the deficit she felt when he slid free of her body. “That was unexpected. But I’m supposed to…” She fished for something while trying not to look like she was floundering for an excuse. “Ahnvil wanted me to help him out with something.”

  “A Gargoyle needing help?”