Jalok

by Elin Wyn

  I watched as my unconscious brother was loaded onto the gurney.

  Tears flowed from my eyes again when Cazak slapped a metal manacle on his ankle and then snapped the other cuff to the support struts of the gurney.

  Then I stood while Adam was wheeled away, and I couldn’t stand it anymore. I rushed back to my room, shut the door, and sat in silent misery.

  Jalok

  The sound of my heavy boots thunking on the tiled floor of the detention center echoed off the plain, reinforced walls. I was accosted several times and asked to show my identification and credentials.

  Security was tight, and not just because Adam was a violent offender. Brass was worried, and for that matter so was I.

  Four days had passed since Dottie’s brother Adam attacked me in her apartment. Every single one of them I stopped by the detention center to visit him.

  At first the guards assumed I was up to some sort of lame attempt at revenge. They separated us by a glass wall and refused to allow us in the same room.

  On the third day they finally put us across from each other at a table, albeit while two wary guards kept a close watch.

  At that point, I was already convinced of my theory.

  I had come to suspect that Adam may not have been in his right mind.

  When I visited, I always asked him to recount his version of events on that fateful evening.

  This is a common tactic in questioning a suspect, because you want to make certain the perp’s story stays consistent. If he deviates from his original narrative, it’s most likely because he was lying one or both times.

  Adam, however, remained consistent throughout each retelling of his story. I flashed my credentials for the final checkpoint, then endured a pat down by a K’ver guard before being ushered into the plain, spartan room where I would have discourse with Adam.

  He sat there in his seat that day, shoulders slumped and face drawn with weariness. The manacles connecting his wrists by a short length of chain were unnecessary. He was a defeated man, and was more troubled by his violent attack than even I was. Though perhaps not more troubled than Dottie.

  The event had traumatized her to the core.

  Adam sighed when I sat down opposite him. I’m certain he was weary of speaking about the traumatic night, but if I didn’t need answers so badly I wouldn’t make him go through it all over again.

  “I’ve already told you everything, Jalok.” He held his head in his hands and sank further into himself. “What’s the point of doing it again?”

  “Just once more, please. Indulge me.”

  Using manners instead of bullying my way through was something I’d picked up from hanging around Dottie.

  Maybe she was rubbing off on me more than I’d thought.

  “All right, fine.” He looked up and flashed me a weak smile, though his eyes remained haunted. They didn’t have that glossy madness of that night, thought. “I did try to kill you. I suppose going through it one more time is a small recompense.”

  “Then start at the beginning. When you first awakened, did you feel strange or emotional in any way?”

  “No, I only felt hungry.” He laughed softly, but the hard sardonic edge was directed at himself. “I really did go to get a sandwich or something.”

  “Walk me through it, please. You headed out of the bedroom, and then what? Step by step.”

  Adam’s brow furrowed as he gathered his thoughts.

  “Well, I walked into the kitchen, it was really dark. I didn’t want to wake….well, I didn’t want to wake you up. I just didn’t want another argument, I just wanted to eat.”

  “So you didn’t want to argue. It was dark, and then?”

  “Then I went to the counter, I opened the drawer and I got out the knife. I was going to carve out some of that roast left from dinner the other night. But then, I--it was like I was watching my body move on its own, like I was being… being pushed.”

  “So you never harbored any anti-alien resentment?”

  Adam laughed, and leaned back in his chair.

  “Of course I did. I’ve never been a fan of the Vengeance aliens. I mean, you brought your war down upon us. Lots of us died. But as much as I might vote for the anti-alien candidate, maybe even participate in a protest or two, I’ve never been violent about it.”

  “You were pushed to say things you didn’t mean?”

  “No, that’s not it at all. I meant what I said. It was my feelings, but not my actions. I don’t know what else I can tell you.”

  He sank his head to the table and seemed deflated.

  I stood up and nodded to the guard to indicate I was ready to leave. “That’s all for today, Adam. Thanks again.”

  To clear my head, and maybe clear the air, I headed toward Dottie’s place.

  I hadn’t been there since the fight, knowing she needed the space. Others had taken temporary guard duty, and I knew she was safe.

  At least physically.

  But I didn’t know how things stood between us, and I needed her, like the air in my lungs. Maybe more so.

  Every step taunted me. Will she want me? Will she, won’t she, will she.

  For the first time, my knock was tentative. Maybe it would have been better to give her more time, maybe …

  Then the door opened, and Dottie stood there in the doorway, all soft loveliness. For a time we stared at each other, and I feared it was anger that shone in her eyes.

  Then she wrapped her arms around me and we held each other for a bit.

  It was hardly a lover’s passionate kiss, but having her near me was all I needed.

  “Come in,” she said softly, weaving her tiny fingers through mine.

  We sat on the sofa holding cups of tea we had no interest in drinking.

  “Listen, I, ah,” I tried to start. “I’m not angry at Adam any more. I don’t think he was responsible for his actions.”

  She smiled up at me and took one of my hands in both of her own. “I know.”

  “What? You do?”

  “I haven’t been just moping around for the past four days, you know. I’ve been speaking a lot with the Puppet Master. At the exact moment of Adam’s berserker rage, the Puppet Master sensed a sort of signature he hadn’t felt in a millennia. He also felt it when Dyrn attacked me. Adam wasn’t in his right mind, not one bit.”

  Sitting there holding her hand, I felt a surge of emotion. After all we’d been through I didn’t want there to be any murkiness between us.

  “Dottie, listen, I, that is, I wanted to say that...” Srell. Why couldn’t this be as easy as combat? How would she even react to the word ‘mate’ after what her brother threw in her face?” “I really--I really like being with you.”

  Her face lit up and she squeezed my hands. “Really? What makes you say that?”

  “Well, I guess you make me feel like maybe I can belong here, even if it’s not the Skotan homeworld. Maybe it can still be my home.”

  She smiled, and kissed the back of my hand.

  “I like being with you, as well. Even though you can act like a violent thug, I feel perfectly safe around you. You have a good heart, Jalok. I’d love for us to prove that human alien relationships can work.”

  “I can think of one way to prove it,” I murmured, pulling her towards me.

  She giggled and put down her teacup on the coffee table. “And what would that be,” she smiled. “Speaking as a scientist.”

  I kissed the soft curve of her neck, savoring the taste of her skin. “We’ll have to make up experiments as we go along.”

  She melted into me and I couldn't take it anymore, couldn't keep up the laughing and joking persona.

  I needed her. Needed her now. Needed her forever.

  “Dottie,” I ground out and thankfully she knew everything I meant in that one word.

  Perfect mate.

  “Yes,” she breathed, winding her arms around my neck. “Yes.”

  I scooped her into my arms and brought her back to the bedroom. �
��First thing tomorrow I'm getting you a new couch,” I growled.

  Then I placed her on the bed like the most precious thing in the world.

  Because she was.

  Unlike her usual pants and tank tops, she wore a lovely floaty dress.

  “I don't remember this,” I commented idly.

  She blushed prettily. “It's, it's new. I was hoping you'd come by.”

  “I like anything you wear,” I sat on the bed next to her. “But this does have some advantages.”

  Kneeling between her legs I ran my hands up her thighs, under her skirt until I found her panties.

  Pulling them off I brushed my fingertip against her slit. She was wet, ready for me.

  She was going to have to wait.

  “I have to know how you taste,” I forced out before I dove upon her and she cried out, her first orgasm almost immediately knocking her out of control.

  When finally I had taken my fill she was limp, relaxed upon the bed.

  Glowing and beautiful.

  “We’ll have to do that more often,” I teased as I quickly undressed.

  “I'm not going to stop you,” she said weakly. “I'm not sure I could.”

  “You could do anything you want with me,” I answered as I gently lifted her, drawing the dress off over her head and laying her back down.

  She was like a feast before me that I knew I should take my time with, savoring every bite.

  But when she wound her arms around my neck again and pulled me close to her, the last few threads that held my restraint frayed.

  “Your mine,” she whispered softly, her breath hot against my ear as I settled between her legs, the head of my cock pressing against her opening, not yet breaching to the hot, sweet, cave within.

  And then she bit my earlobe. And I bucked, sheathing myself inside her in one savage move.

  “Now, my mate,” she murmured. “Take me now.”

  And I did.

  Epilogue: Dottie

  I walked into the Silver Whale to find Adam was already there. When he saw me, he smiled and waved. I crossed the dining room and sat down at what had become our table in the back corner.

  “You don’t look happy,” he commented.

  “I’ve been dealing with a lot,” I gave him a pointed look.

  “I don’t know what’s been going on with me. I swear.” He gave me a pleading look. “You believe me, right?”

  “You’re my brother, Adam. I’m on your side no matter what.” I reached across the table to squeeze his hand.

  “Thanks, Dottie. I needed to hear that.”

  We sat in silence until a server came by to take our orders.

  “Was there anything else you wanted to talk about?” Adam prompted.

  “Yes, actually.”

  “And here I thought you just wanted to check in on your brother,” he teased.

  “I wanted to tell you before you found out from someone else,” I began.

  “Oh, boy.” Adam leaned back in his seat. “How bad is it?”

  “Jalok and I are together now.”

  Adam sat forward once more. “That’s great, Dottie. You two are well suited for each other.”

  “Do you mean that?” A smile spread across my face but stopped when Adam started to frown.

  “It’s what I want to feel,” he said after a moment of consideration. “I want to feel happy that you’ve found someone more than anything. You’ve been through a lot. You deserve some uncomplicated happiness.”

  “But?”

  “But something inside me is repulsed that you’re with him. I hate it.”

  “I appreciate your honesty.” I fought to get the words out. “It’s good that you’re talking about your feelings.”

  “They aren’t my feelings,” Adam groaned. “They’re feelings that I have that I don’t want. These feelings don’t even feel like mine.”

  “What do you mean?”

  The conversation abruptly stopped when the server arrived with our food.

  “Who do you think caught this?” Adam asked.

  “Hudd, of course. He brings in the best. The restaurants fight over him every week.” I grinned down at the perfect filet of fish on my plate.

  “I really missed fish,” Adam laughed. “Once trade routes were shut down, Duvest didn’t get any fish.”

  “Dig in.”

  I gave Adam a few moments to savor his meal before returning to the hard questions.

  “Do your feelings not feel like yours?” I prompted.

  “No,” Adam said in a low voice. “When the Xathi invaded, I hated them with every fiber of my being. The hatred that’s inside me now feels nothing like that. It’s not mine.”

  “How is that possible?” I pressed.

  “I don’t know. I don’t even know if I’m right. Something just feels off.”

  “We don’t have to talk about it anymore,” I assured him. “Enjoy your lunch.”

  “That I can do.”

  I made sure to keep the rest of the conversation light. When we finished lunch, Adam was in high spirits.

  “I’ll see you soon, right?” He asked as we walked out of the Silver Whale.

  “Of course! Tomorrow, probably.”

  “Great.”

  I hugged him extra tightly before we parted ways. I was grateful he didn’t ask me where I was going. He wouldn’t have liked it.

  From the Silver Whale, I walked to Strike Team Three’s base camp. Sk’lar arranged for my favorite Valorni pilot to fly me out to the crater at the Vengeance crash site.

  I didn’t bring any equipment with me this time. It wasn’t a work visit but rather a personal one.

  “I won’t be long,” I told my pilot when we landed. “Are you okay with waiting?”

  “Sure. A friend of mine is stationed out here. I’ll go catch up with him.”

  “Thanks. I’ll come find you.”

  As I walked across the crater to the tunnel, I noticed the ground moving beneath me. I smiled. On a whim, I touched a random plant growing through the crater floor.

  “Can you feel me through this?” I asked.

  “Indeed,” the Puppet Master replied.

  “Interesting. I should’ve brought my field notes. That would’ve made an interesting addition.”

  “You’ll remember. I will agree to let you experiment on that further.”

  “I’ll schedule it.”

  “You did not bring your tools for collecting data,” the Puppet Master observed. “This leads me to believe you have other motives for coming to see me.”

  “Can’t I just visit a friend?” I chuckled.

  “Of course, but I sense unease within you. Would you care to talk about it?”

  “It’s my brother. I’m worried about him. I think he’s worried too.” I traced patterns in the dirt walls with the tip of my finger.

  “That tickles,” the Puppet Master said.

  “You’re ticklish?”

  “So it would seem.”

  “Fascinating!”

  “Your concerns for your brother are not unfounded,” the Puppet Master pressed on. “I’ve been keeping watch on him as well.”

  “What have you noticed?” A lump of dread formed in the pit of my stomach.

  “There are parts of him that do not belong to him,” the Puppet Master explained. “I apologize for not being clearer. That’s the only way I know how to describe it. He’s quite literally at war with himself.”

  “You mean there’s something inside him making him act the way he’s been acting?”

  “In a sense, yes. It’s difficult to describe accurately.”

  “Will he be all right?” I asked.

  “Time will tell.”

  “I regret introducing you to philosophy,” I groaned.

  “That’s not philosophy. That is a simple fact,” the Puppet Master corrected. “I can’t predict the future any better than you can.”

  “But you can make an educated guess based on patterns,” I contradicted. �
�Have you seen this before? Is there some kind of pattern to follow?”

  “I will look for patterns,” the Puppet Master promised. “While I do that, I request that you take extra precautions in your self-care.”

  “Why?”

  “You appear to be unaware of what’s happening to your body. As your friend, it’s my duty to warn you.”

  “Warn me about what?” Fear tightened in my chest. Was whatever it was inside Adam inside me as well? I couldn’t bear it if I started to hate Jalok.

  “You must cultivate the life inside of you with care,” the Puppet Master advised.

  “What?” I blinked in surprise. “Is that your way of telling me to do yoga or meditate?”

  “It’s my way of telling you that you’re growing new life within you.”

  The world tipped on its axis as the meaning of the Puppet Master’s words settled over me. The Puppet Master’s tendrils snaked around my waist and grabbed my arms as I stumbled to the side.

  “Are you saying I’m…” I couldn’t say it. I didn’t want to say it out loud yet. I wanted Jalok to be there the first time I said it out loud.

  “Yes. If you need to leave now, I understand.”

  “Thank you.” I wrapped my arms around the thicket’s tendril and hugged it. I couldn’t be sure, but I thought I heard the Puppet Master laugh.

  I ran across the crater to find my Valorni pilot. He flew me back to Kaster as quickly as possible.

  Jalok was already in my apartment when I arrived, walking across the living room with a thick sandwich in hand.

  “I was just going to lie down,” he said quickly.

  “I don’t believe you,” I smirked. The fight with Adam hadn’t done much good for his recovering system from the acid attack, but he’d been terrible about following Dr. Parr’s bedrest orders.

  Her orders weren’t unreasonable. Jalok was simply a terrible patient.

  “You look happy.” His eyes narrowed in suspicion.

  “I am,” I beamed.

  “Did you have a breakthrough in the lab?”

  “Nope.”

  “Did you make a good deal at the market.”

  “Nope.”

  “Are you going to keep me guessing?”

  “As fun as that would be, nope. I went to see the Puppet Master.”