Wrapped Up In Christmas

by Janice Lynn

  Bodie glanced toward his friend questioningly.

  “You zoned out on me. Sorry, man. I didn’t mean to bring up bad memories.”

  That’s when it hit him that he’d thought of what had happened and he’d been okay. The darkness hadn’t clawed at him. Sure, the memory still gutted him, but he could remember it without despair threatening to take over.

  Which made him feel stronger than he’d felt in a long time.

  His body was healing. His mind was healing. He was on the brink of starting a new career, one that would eventually put him back in the action and allow him to help his best friend.

  He met Lukas’s concerned gaze. “I’m good.”

  Lukas studied him a moment, then nodded. “For the first time in months, I believe you are. I don’t know what happened in Kentucky, but something must have.”

  Sarah’s sweet face flashed through Bodie’s mind. Her smile. Her laughter. Her kind heart. The way she loved the Butterflies and they loved her. The way she’d looked at him after their kiss beneath the mistletoe after a snowy sleigh ride.

  He flexed his jaw, shrugged, then said, “Nothing happened in Kentucky.”

  “Yeah, right.” Lukas laughed. “You forget who you’re talking to, but whatever. Come on and meet my daughter.”

  Lukas knocked on the door, then they entered the hospital room. Kelly, looking lovely as ever, lay in the bed, a blanket tucked up around her waist, and a wrapped-up bundle in her arms.

  Lukas crossed the room, kissed his wife, then grinned down at the baby she held. “Isn’t she the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen?”

  Bodie stared at his friend in amazement. Was this really the same tough, take-no-prisoners man he’d rather have had at his side during battle than any other? Lukas had loved the adrenaline rush every bit as much as Bodie had. Yet in this quiet, domestic moment, his friend looked completely happy.

  Good for him.

  Now that Bodie was returning to work, he’d be happy, too.

  Well, if not happy, he’d be content to be back to doing what he loved, to be able to feel whole again.

  What he wouldn’t do is look at his friend and wonder if he could have ever been happy with that type of life—with a wife, a child, a home he could return to at the end of every day. If things had been different then maybe it could have been him with Sarah welcoming a child.

  But things weren’t different. This was the life he had.

  Every muscle in his body tightened, making taking his next breath difficult.

  “Get over here and see your goddaughter,” Kelly ordered when Bodie lingered near the door. “And thank you for doing this so Lukas can be here with us.”

  Shoving his wayward thoughts aside, Bodie smiled at the woman who he’d grown to genuinely like during the time he’d lived with them, and who obviously made his friend a happy man. “No problem. I appreciate you forcing his hand into letting me get back to work sooner rather than later.”

  “You’re ready?” she asked, concern visible in her eyes.

  He understood why she asked. She’d seen the darkness in him, had heard him cry out with the nightmares.

  For those same reasons, he understood why his friend had wanted him to take those few extra weeks that the V.A. doctors had thought he needed.

  They’d been right. Although he had been physically ready for any job handed to him, his mind hadn’t been in the right place.

  He hadn’t been in the right place.

  Being around Sarah, soaking in her goodness, had soothed his tortured soul, made him want to be better than what he was. For that, and so much more, he’d be eternally grateful.

  Knowing he told the truth, he nodded. “I’m ready.”

  “Everything’s ready for tomorrow?”

  Snuggling beneath the quilt her mother had made her father, Sarah took a sip of hot tea and nodded. “I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t.”

  Her father laughed. “There is that.”

  Although she’d started the day early, doing one last walkthrough to make sure everything was perfect for the open house, Sarah had spent most of the day with her father. They’d gone to Maybelle’s for a late Christmas Eve lunch, then they’d met up with the Butterflies and others from church to go caroling, then they’d attended a Christmas Eve service.

  She’d had a busy day. A good day. And yet…

  “I was at Lou’s yesterday,” her father continued. “Everyone I talked to is excited about the Open House tomorrow.”

  “Me, too.” Mostly. Because no matter how much she tried she couldn’t quite get past the wish that Bodie would be there.

  He wouldn’t be.

  “Your Aunt Jean would be very proud of what you’ve done with Hamilton House, Sarah.”

  Sarah’s gaze lifted to her father’s and she fought tears. “You think so?”

  He nodded. “The only thing she loved more than that old house was you. That you are there, breathing life into those walls again, would have meant the world to her. I know she’s cheering you on from heaven, and that Roy and your mom are right there with her.”

  Putting her hot tea down on a side table, she got up, crossed to his recliner and gave him a hug. “Thank you for always knowing what to say to make me feel better.”

  “Not always,” he admitted. “I didn’t know what to say when that idiot Richard left.”

  Settling back onto the sofa and pulling her mother’s quilt back up around her, Sarah shrugged. “Richard did me a favor by leaving. If he’d stayed, I might have settled.”

  Her father grimaced. “You should never settle, Sarah. What about that last one, Bodie?”

  “Bodie was my handyman, not my boyfriend.”

  “I’m a preacher, Sarah, not a blind man.”

  “Meaning?”

  “Meaning I saw how you looked at him,” he said.

  “Not sure what you think you saw, but I never thought there would be anything permanent between Bodie and I.”

  “Then you were the only one.”

  “The Butterflies don’t count. They’re perpetual matchmakers. I’m surprised they haven’t driven you crazy over the years with trying to remarry you.”

  Sadness flashed in his eyes. “Your mother was my soul mate. I never met anyone else who came close. It wouldn’t have been fair to marry when my heart would always belong to her.”

  “You, Aunt Jean, Maybelle,” Sarah sighed. “I’m surrounded by people who loved and lost.”

  He shook his head. “I loved, Sarah. There is no lost. Some never experience what I shared with your mother. I’ve no regrets.” He studied her a moment. “But I get the feeling your comment had more to do with a certain handyman than it did me, Maybelle, or your aunt.”

  “I don’t love him,” she denied, then took a sip of her tea. “I mean, had I not known he was leaving from the beginning, I might’ve fallen in love with him. But I did know—so I refused to get attached.”

  Much.

  Her father looked empathetic. “If that’s what you need to believe, I won’t correct you.”

  “It is what I believe,” she defended, annoyed that he’d implied otherwise. She did not love Bodie.

  She missed him, longed for him to be at Hamilton House, because he’d been great company. She missed their conversations, his smile, the fluttery feeling she got when he laughed, his intelligence, and thoughtfulness. She missed Harry, too.

  But that didn’t mean she loved Bodie. She didn’t.

  I’m falling for you. His words echoed through her mind. If only, he really had fallen. If only he hadn’t left. If only…

  She glanced at her father, saw that he was smiling.

  “You ever consider going after him?”

  “What? That’s the most ludicrous thing I’ve ever heard you say.” She couldn’t believe her father even asked such
a silly thing. Of course she hadn’t considered going after Bodie. Her life was in Pine Hill. Who knew where in the world he was?

  His friend Lukas would know. She had his number from when Bodie gave it as a reference.

  For that matter, she had Bodie’s cell number.

  But she wouldn’t use it. He’d left. Even if she called, it would change nothing.

  “Did you tell him what you told me, that if he’d stayed in Pine Hill that you could have fallen for him?”

  “What would be the point in telling him that? He was always leaving.”

  “I want to see you happy, Sarah. If he makes you happy, then you need to be with him.”

  Had her father not been paying attention? Bodie had never meant to stay. He’d come to say thank you, had stayed to help her, and then he was gone.

  “I am happy,” she assured her father. She was. She had her father and the Butterflies, her friends and church, and Hamilton House. “I don’t need Bodie to be happy or for anything else.”

  She didn’t. Hamilton House would open tomorrow, on Christmas Day, and she’d begin a new adventure.

  Just as Bodie had begun a new adventure.

  But friends did wish each other Merry Christmas and later that night as she lay in her childhood bed, she sent a text.

  She really did hope Bodie had a Merry Christmas.

  “I shouldn’t be here. Not on Christmas Eve,” Bodie complained to his best friend as they chilled in Lukas’s living room. Kelly had gone to the nursery to feed Lucy and put her down to bed just a few minutes after Bodie had arrived.

  He’d come straight from the airport and was exhausted.

  “You really think Kelly would let you go to a hotel room after your flight came in this evening?”

  “You didn’t have to tell her when I’d be back.”

  “Because she didn’t know when I was scheduled to return?” Lukas challenged, then gestured to the dog lying across Bodie’s lap. “Besides, somebody missed you. Never seen him just sit and stare at the door the way he has the past two weeks.”

  Harry had practically tackled him when he’d walked into Lukas’s place. No one had ever missed him the way the dog apparently had.

  Bodie stroked his hand along Harry’s spine. Harry lifted his head, gave Bodie’s cheek one appreciative lick, then settled back down.

  “Thanks for watching him while I was away.” Closing his eyes, Bodie leaned his head back against the recliner.

  He had missed Harry. Missed a lot of things.

  But the mission had been good.

  An extraction of a well-connected Middle Eastern family who’d gotten trapped behind enemy lines as political winds had shifted. Bodie and his team had gone in, gotten the family out, and moved them to a safe location.

  They’d run into resistance, which had tested Body’s readiness, but he’d had no difficulties doing what needed to be done.

  Afterwards, flushed with success, he had felt alive, whole.

  And yet, he’d also felt as if something were missing.

  Someone.

  “You planning to stick around until the new year?”

  Opening his eyes, he met his friend’s gaze and shook his head. “Figured I’d head out in the morning for Texas.” That way Lukas and Kelly could spend Christmas morning together without his intrusion.

  “You’re welcome to stay until January when you go to D.C.”

  “For my glorified babysitting job?”

  Lukas laughed. “Sorry. Most of our jobs aren’t like the one you just pulled off.”

  Bodie’s phone vibrated and, shifting Harry around until he could reach his pocket, he pulled the phone out.

  Merry Christmas.

  The same fluttery feeling he got anytime he thought of Sarah filled him. He hadn’t expected to hear from her, to have any contact with her ever again. That she’d reached out to tell him “Merry Christmas” fit, though. Sarah wanted everyone to have a good Christmas. It was just who she was.

  “Everything okay?” Lukas asked when Bodie remained quiet, staring at his phone.

  He glanced up at his friend and nodded. “Fine.”

  “You’re a terrible liar,” Lukas pointed out. “That from Kentucky?”

  Bodie glanced at his friend. “Since when did being my boss give you rights to my private life?”

  “Since when did you have a private life?”

  Since he’d gone to thank an elderly lady for his quilt and met a young, beautiful woman who lived to serve others. A woman who smiled and lit up a room. A woman who smiled and lit up him.

  Wondering what had happened to the exhaustion he’d felt moments before, Bodie stared at the message, started to type back a message, then hesitated.

  He shouldn’t text her, shouldn’t encourage her to remember him.

  The sooner they both forgot what they’d shared, the better.

  Only, he didn’t want Sarah to forget him. Not ever.

  Chapter Seventeen

  “Not that I expected otherwise, but it looks like today is going to be a big success.”

  Sarah clasped her hands together and smiled at Maybelle. “It does, doesn’t it? Let’s just hope people actually come by.”

  She’d been so nervous all morning. She’d stayed the night at her father’s but left early to get everything just so prior to time for guests to arrive.

  Maybelle had shown an hour early to help with last minute items needing attention, saying the other Butterflies would be there soon to do their part in helping with the Open House.

  “Whether locals come to your Open House or not, Hamilton House will be a success.” Maybelle wiped her finger over a piece of furniture, inspecting to make sure there was no dust. “You going to leave that out?”

  Sarah followed Maybelle’s line of vision and nodded. She’d considered packing the quilt away, keeping her secret safe a while longer. Instead, she’d left it right where it was. Right where it had been since the day Bodie had left.

  “Everyone in our quilting group is going to recognize it as the one you donated to Quilts of Valor after Jean died.”

  “Doesn’t matter.”

  “That’s why he came here, to find you,” Maybelle mused, then walked over to the quilt, picked up one corner from where it draped over a rocking chair. “Why do you think he left it?”

  Sarah knew why.

  “He didn’t need, or want, it anymore. He told me once that when he received it, it made him remember why he did what he did. In the end, I think it reminded him of things he’d rather forget, including me.”

  Maybelle’s gaze cut to her. Sarah waited, expecting the woman to offer some tidbit of wisdom or some dry remark meant to make Sarah feel better. She did neither.

  “I’m sorry he left.”

  Sarah was sorry about a lot of things. Like how foolish she’d been the night before when she’d texted him. He hadn’t texted back. Not even a simple “Thanks” or “Merry Christmas back.” Would it have hurt him to have shown that courtesy?

  Or maybe he wanted to make sure she got the message loud and clear that he’d left, and that he didn’t want reminders of her.

  “It doesn’t matter.” Sarah waved off Maybelle’s concern. She wouldn’t cry over things she had no control over. Today was Christmas. The best day of the year. She wouldn’t let thoughts of Bodie dampen her joy. Today was a good day. A great day.

  “I may have forgotten to mention,” Maybelle said slyly, “but I invited a friend to come up to interview you.”

  “Interview me?”

  “Really, he’s more the son of a friend,” she clarified. “But same difference.”

  Sarah grimaced. “You’re not matchmaking, are you? Because I don’t need that today.”

  Or any other day. She planned to spend the foreseeable future focusing on Hamilton House and
her work with the church. It was a good life.

  “Matchmaking wouldn’t do a bit of good right now with you hung up on Bodie. So, no, I’m not matchmaking. Just doing my part to get the word out about Hamilton House.”

  “Where does he work?”

  Maybelle named a travel magazine Sarah had contacted months ago. She’d been disappointed but unsurprised that she hadn’t heard back from them. That they’d respond had been a long shot.

  “You’re kidding,” she gasped, staring at Maybelle in disbelief.

  “I don’t kid,” Maybelle reminded drily and with an expression so regal she must have royalty somewhere in her bloodline.

  “There is that. Wow, Maybelle. Thank you. Thank you.” She hugged the woman, then took a deep breath as she heard the front door open.

  “We’re here!” Rosie called as several people entered the house.

  The Butterflies must have ridden over together.

  Sarah went into the foyer, then stopped short. Ruby, Charlie, Claudia, Claudia’s husband, Rosie, and Sarah’s father were just inside the door. As was a trunk with a big red bow stuck on it, two lamps with green ribbon tied around them, some brocaded pillows, and several more items that looked wonderfully familiar.

  “Surprise!” Ruby said.

  “Merry Christmas, Sarah!” Rosie and Claudia said at the same time.

  “We would have wrapped everything but didn’t want you to have paper and packages everywhere for your Open House,” Maybelle said from beside her.

  “You want us to carry all of this upstairs?” Charlie asked.

  “I…” Sarah looked at the items again. “These were Aunt Jean’s.” She stared at her friends, wide-eyed. “In Aunt Jean’s ledger, you’re ‘B’!”

  “B is for butterfly,” Rosie reminded her.

  “You bought these things from Aunt Jean.”

  “Stubborn woman had too much pride to accept our help, started selling off her things to an antique shop in Louisville. Rosie commented how much she’d like to buy one of the wardrobes upstairs. Jean offered to give it to her, but finally agreed to sell it.” Maybelle’s blue eyes sparkled. “Next thing you know, we were all in the antique buying business.”