The Conduit

by Stacey Rourke

CHAPTER 8

  I had a plan. I was fairly certain it was an asinine plan, but it was all I could come up with it, so I was gonna own it. Since my head versus rock incident, Alec had called, texted, and stopped by repeatedly to check on me. In his latest text, he asked me out for dinner. I couldn’t deny that I wanted to see him again, plus I needed to try out my empathe ability in the big, wide world. (Well, not the big world—more the Podunk, isolated world—but still.) The worst that could happen was me being unable to hold back the emotions that invaded me, then having myself a fun little freak out in front of the cute boy. Heck, I might even lose control of a few bodily functions in front of him. That’d be swell. If things went that route, my plan was to claim food poisoning and run like that rumored panther was chasing me. See? I had a plan.

  I inhaled a shaky breath to calm my nerves and exhaled through pursed, freshly glossed lips. I had scoured my closet for the right ensemble for tonight. I wanted an outfit that said, “I like you, but I don’t know how much yet. So, I want to entice you without leading you on.” Nothing in my closet fit that description. There was no choice but to call in Kendall’s keen fashion sense. She dressed me in a pair of blue jean capris and a loosely fitted canary yellow tank top with lace trim at the neckline. Then she came at me baring her tackle box full of hair pins, combs, and other frilly paraphernalia. I repelled her by holding up her only known weakness—a scrunchie I fully intended to use to pull my hair back. She hissed and retreated to her perfectly quaffed shadows. I checked out my reflection in the mirror. Nice and casual. No way could Alec get the wrong idea.

  “Celeste! Your boyfriend’s here!” Gabe bellowed from the bottom of the stairs.

  Gabe Garrett, you are a monumental pain in my…

  I did my best to ignore his flare up of foot-in-mouth disease and focused instead on bracing myself for whatever the night would hold. I flung the bedroom door open with as much courage as I could muster and headed downstairs. An unforeseen problem developed as soon as my feet touched the polished wood stairs. I began envisioning all sorts of terrible scenarios. What if I read Alec’s emotions and found out he didn’t like me? Or that he’s only after “one thing”? What if half way through the night he decides I’m a total goober and I just so happen to be plugged into his emotions at the moment he makes that discovery? Worse yet, what if he’s only using me to get closer to Kendall? It wouldn’t be the first time that happened. I hadn’t even thought about the consequences of knowing exactly what he was feeling! Why did I think I could pull this off?!

  By the time I reached the bottom of the stairs, I had worked myself up into a state of sweaty, frazzled panic. Worse yet, I couldn’t will myself to round the corner into the foyer. I was stuck at the bottom of the stairwell with my legs sending a message loud and clear: this is going to be unpleasant. Therefore we have decided against going. Thank you very much for the offer, but no.

  Idle conversation from the other side of the wall. “What are you…lifting twenty-four/seven? You’re really bulking up. I almost didn’t recognize you.”

  “No, I haven’t been hitting the weights any more than usual. Must just be from working out with the team.”

  Listen to them, chattering away while I’m stuck mid-panic attack. I knew I was being ridiculous. If my stubborn, lead feet wouldn’t budge, I was just going to move them manually. I grabbed the corner of the wall in a white-knuckled grip and hoisted myself around into the foyer in one big swoop. Alec and Gabe stopped and stared.

  “Everything okay?” Alec asked, his eyes wide and alarmed.

  I didn’t know yet…was it? It might take a second before it hits. I wasn’t feeling anything. Nothing rushed over me. The rule must apply to other people too! The emotions would only come to me if I reached out for them. Relief flooded me—immediately followed by embarrassment.

  I still had a grip on the wall like I was bracing myself for some sort of natural disaster. With the hold I had, it was impressive I didn’t crack the plaster. I quickly let go, adjusted my posture, and crammed my hands into my pockets.

  “Sorry. I…thought I left my flat iron on upstairs,” I stammered. I’m an awful liar.

  “And it caused the second story to explode? What is with you lately?” Gabe’s dark brows pulled together as he frowned.

  I tittered a weak laugh to make light of it. “Yeah, funny, huh? Hi, Alec.”

  The unanswered questions that played across his face made me glad I didn’t have to feel his emotions right then. The expression he settled on was equal parts amusement and confusion. “Hi. Nice entrance.”

  “Like that? Wait till you see my dinner show.”

  Gabe turned to Alec and clasped a hand on his shoulder with enough force to cause Alec to wince. “You know, no one will think badly of you if you decide not to go through with this. We know how she is and would totally understand.”

  I glared daggers at him.

  “I’ll take my chances.” Alec winked at me with a crooked grin.

  “Whatever, man. Your funeral.” As Gabe passed me, he noticed my evil eye and answered it with a toothy grin. My rebuttal was an elbow to his ribs, which hurt like I rammed my funny bone into a brick wall. I grabbed my elbow and grimaced in pain. Gabe laughed.

  With my brother gone, Alec moved in closer. He put a hand on each side of my head and did a mock examination, turning my head this way and that. He then turned his attention to my left arm, gently lifting it up, flipping it over, inspecting it, and then dropping it back to my side. He repeated the pattern with my right arm and paused to dot a kiss to the elbow that was smarting from hitting Gabe.

  “What are you doing?” I asked.

  “Making sure you’re still structurally sound after your head trauma.” He held my hand in both of his for a moment before reluctantly releasing it. “You seem good.”

  “I’m feeling better. But thank you for the clean bill of health.”

  He looked into my eyes intently. “You’re good? Really?”

  I could feel myself blushing under his intense stare. I broke our gaze and looked away as I pushed a loose lock of hair behind my ear. “Yes, I’m really okay. How’ve you been?”

  Alec filled me in on his activities over the last few days. I’ll be honest. I completely tuned out. Despite my earlier fears, curiosity got the best of me. I opened myself up to whatever his psyche would tell me.

  It came so subtly I almost missed it. My palms dampened, my heartbeat sped up a bit, and a fresh blush colored my face. He liked me, and I was feeling just how much. Guilt plagued me because I didn’t know if my feelings matched his. Truth be told, I’d only ever had one boyfriend. His name was Owen. We met in art class and I fell for his soulful brown eyes and easy smile. Right about the time in our relationship when we were thinking of exploring “second base,” my Dad died. Owen tried to comfort me and be there for me, but I completely shut him out. When I found taking care of my family left no time for anything else, I broke up with him. Since then, I hadn’t dated at all. I didn’t know if I was ready for another relationship or not. I definitely didn’t want to hurt Alec like I had Owen.

  Yet as I stood there, deeply immersed in these borrowed emotions, I couldn’t help but revel in how nice it felt. This level of enamored infatuation made me feel alive again, even if it wasn’t my emotion to hold onto. As I looked at Alec, the feelings of adoration accentuated all his finest attributes. His crystal blue eyes twinkled like that of a mischievous little boy. The afternoon light filtering in through the window emphasized the red in his hair. If I kept plugged into him like this, I was going to have no choice but to stretch up on my tiptoes and gently press my lips to his.

  But I didn’t.

  Instead, I closed the valve on the emotional spigot that flowed from him and went back to my own infuriatingly indecisive feelings.

  “…it came out blue, which was weird. But I think I can live with it.” Wrong moment to tune back in. I had no clue what he was talking about.

  “Blue’s not bad.” I in
terjected, hoping the answer would fit somehow.

  “Absolutely. Blue is totally workable.” His eyes crinkled as he grinned. I gave an internal phew and vowed not let my mind wander like that again. “So, are you hungry?”

  “Famished. Let’s eat.”