Other Echoes

by Noe Dearden

Emi spent her Sunday catching up on homework. She went to the public library to study, because the mood at home was so tense it made concentrating impossible. Mom and Charlotte had been snapping at each other all weekend. Charlotte kept asking to talk with Mr. Kerrigan, but mom wouldn’t let her on the phone with him. He was staying with some friends in town, because everyone agreed it was a good idea for him to keep his distance from the family for the time being.

  On Sunday morning, mom got a long phone call from the school. When she hung up, she looked upset.

  “One of the parents is petitioning for Will to be let go,” mom said. “Apparently, word has gotten out that he’s had an inappropriate relationship with a student. The PFA is up in arms.”

  “I thought you said they haven’t proven anything yet,” Emi said.

  “That doesn’t stop people from talking, I’m afraid.”

  When Charlotte found out the news, she grew even quieter and holed herself into her room. That’s when Emi decided it was time to get out of the house. Charlotte’s presence was like a vortex of dark feelings.

  Between her boatload of homework and the drama at home, Emi conveniently forgot all about Josh until Monday morning rolled around, and she realized she would have to face him in person during French class. She didn’t know why that made her so nervous. So what if he had harbored a crush on her forever? That didn’t mean she was under any obligation to like him back. Not that she didn’t like him as a friend. But they had nothing in common. And now she had Kainoa back, so all of this was irrelevant.

  When she arrived on campus, instead of going straight to her first class, as she had been doing for the past two weeks, Emi went to the big monkeypod tree in the quad. A lot of sophomores hung out around those picnic tables. Sure enough, they were there. Kainoa, Ethan, Marina and Tori. Conspicuously absent was Natalie.

  Feeling somewhat timid, Emi walked over and inserted herself between Ethan and Kainoa. She was pleased to see them move to make space for her. The small gesture was enough to signify that she was back among their ranks.

  “Ugh, who cares,” Marina was saying. “She’s nice in small doses, but in concentrated amounts, it’s like, ‘go away already.’”

  “Who are you talking about?” Emi asked.

  Everybody looked at her. Their eyes went straight to the hand Kainoa had placed on her knee. They were decoding his body language, sniffing out the new developments.

  “Natalie,” Marina said.

  “I thought you liked her, Rina. You were the one always laughing at her jokes,” Tori said.

  “Yeah, they were funny because they were so incredibly not funny. You know what I mean?”

  “She’s like goat milk. Refreshing and gross at the same time,” Ethan said.

  Marina flipped her hair back and examined the tips critically. “That’s, like, the perfect analogy.”

  “Don’t be mean, you guys,” Kainoa said. “She wasn’t that bad. She just wasn’t the right girl for me.”

  “Exactly. Goat milk is an acquired taste,” Ethan said. “Personally, I think we’re all glad you’ve come back to the cow.”

  Everybody looked at Emi and snickered.

  “Are you calling me a cow?” she asked, ready to volley a few insults of her own.

  “No, I’m saying you’re more like cow’s milk. Creamy, sweet and delicious.”

  “Hmm,” she said suspiciously.

  Tori jumped in and changed the subject. “Hey Em. I heard your cousin did the nasty with Mr. Kerrigan. Is it true?”

  “Who told you that?”

  “My mom’s on the PFA. She said they had a big fight at the luau.”

  “What?” Kainoa said. “You never told me, Em!”

  “Yeah, seriously, what’s this about?” Ethan asked. “I didn’t even know you had a cousin.”

  Emi stared daggers at Tori. “There’s nothing to tell. Charlotte says he never did anything to her.”

  “That’s not what my mom says,” Tori went on, unfazed. “I heard Mr. K got the axe. They already have a long-term sub taking over his classes.”

  “There is so much drama going on this year,” Marina remarked. “And I thought it was bad when Nat’s dad ran off with his secretary. This is so much crazier.”

  “Excuse me. Natalie’s dad did what?” Emi exclaimed. Her mind was still processing the information that Mr. Kerrigan had been fired. This new development had her blindsided.

  “Didn’t you know? His dad left with a woman half his age. They’re moving to New Zealand and having a baby together.” Marina seemed to enjoy sharing this juicy gossip

  Tori cut in, “Can you imagine? That fat, bald guy having another kid? At his age!”

  “Are you guys serious?” Emi asked. “This is real?”

  Kainoa nodded. “Yeah. That’s why Nat was such a mess, weeping all over the place. We all felt bad for her at first, but it’s been months. She has to suck it up and move on. She was such a downer.”

  The others went on jabbering away. Emi grew quiet. It was not surprising that Kainoa and the others treated the issue so insensitively, but the degree of their indifference was still unsettling. Emi felt she was surrounded by strangers.

  She had expected to feel vindicated about regaining status as Kainoa’s girl. She had focused so single-mindedly on one-upping Natalie. But there was no satisfaction to be had here. Instead, she felt ashamed and deflated. This was not the person she wanted to become. She did not want to be a girl who cut others down for sport. Who was capable of nothing but scorn. Who valued her social status above her friends and defined herself by her relationship status. How had she let this happen? How had she fallen so far from herself?

  Kainoa was laughing at something Ethan had said. He had his hand on Emi’s thigh, stroking it lightly with his thumb. There was something possessive about the way he held her there.

  She stood abruptly and his hand dropped away.

  “Where you going?” he asked. “There’s still twenty minutes till class.”

  She looked at all of them, Marina, Tori, Ethan, Kainoa, studying their faces. They were human. They had feelings and insecurities and problems of their own. Who knows why they acted the way they did? All Emi knew was that she needed to get away from them for a while. She needed to get her head on straight. Or was it heart that had fallen out of alignment?

  “I forgot. I promised my math teacher I’d talk to him before class,” she lied.

  She went to her math room and slumped down against the wall outside. Taking a deep breath, she pulled out her notebook and retrieved the ballpoint pen from its spine, then flipped past her math equations to the back page.