Crushed (Collided Book 2)
Page 12
“You’re right. I’ll see if I can do something part-time maybe,” I say with a forced smile before cupping his face in my hand and kissing him on the lips. “It’s a good idea.” I assure his skeptical expression with a warm smile.
I sure as hell hope this is a good idea.
“You’re going to work for him?!” Parker says almost in a screech at lunch, after I explain everything that happened.
“Yeah,” I say, embarrassed, before sipping down my mimosa.
“Jesus Mads that’s lot isn’t it?” she says, letting her concern show full throttle. My stomach flips and I let out a deep breath.
“I know! I just couldn’t think of a good reason not to. Well, one that I could tell Alex as to why I wouldn’t want to work there! If what happened hadn’t I’d have jumped at the chance. Also, Alex wants me to keep an eye on Alyssa. I think she might have a crush on Jackson and—”
“You don’t care, do you?” she asks appraisingly, an eyebrow shooting up in a way that reminds me of Melissa.
“No. I mean, not for why you’d think, but I just want to make sure nothing else happens that could cause a family catastrophe, I guess,” I tell her with a shrug.
“You don’t honestly think that she’d really go there with him?” she says.
“No. I mean, I don’t know…hopefully she’ll meet someone at the office that takes her attention,” I say as I finish off the salmon salad.
“Do you think he’d go there with her?” she asks with a knowing look.
“No, I’ve seen them together more now. He loves Alex and wouldn’t do anything to hurt him,” I tell her somberly and she gives me a soft smile.
“What about your dad?” she asks carefully. I only gave her a quick rundown of what happened the day after and I was a total mess about it still.
“I highly doubt that relationship will take off after how I acted. Besides, I did what I wanted—I confronted him,” I reason even though I still think about him every day. She nods in understanding.
“And what about the girl you work with…your sister?” she says awkwardly. I roll my eyes at the thought.
“Haven’t heard from her and hopefully it stays that way. I didn’t even know she wasn’t in New York. Hopefully she’s moved back there so I don’t have to deal with my family history spreading around our circle.”
“You think she would, I mean it has to be pretty embarrassing for her too.”
I frown and Parker sighs.
“You know what I mean,” she adds quickly and I nod.
“Enough about me, update me on all things wedding!” This results in her beaming and the rest of the lunch I get lost in the talk about her wedding. When I leave the lunch with Parker I get a call from Alyssa.
“Hey, what’s up?” I ask as I make my way to the subway.
“Have you checked your email?” she asks almost giddily.
“No I just left lunch with my friend…” I say cautiously.
“Jackson’s HR emailed me and asked me to come to the office Monday for orientation! You probably have an email too!” she squeals and my stomach sinks. I didn’t really think all of this would happen so soon. I feel a little dizzy as I dodge people who I’m not moving fast enough for.
“Aren’t you excited? I have to get something to wear. Do you want to go shopping?” she asks and I try to muster my most upbeat tone so I don’t kill her mood. I know this is a big deal for her and I don’t want to ruin it.
“I’m not feeling really good, I think I ate some bad salmon. But I can’t wait to see what you get,” I tell her.
As soon as I hang up, I rack my brain for an excuse not to start.
I thought I’d be okay with this, but I am not prepared! I don’t want to be around Jackson any more than I have to be. Sure, he probably isn’t at the office much. I know he travels a lot but this is too much. I knew that before but it’s smacking me in the face now. I’ll just tell Alex that I got a slew of clients last minute and I can’t do it, but the sting of lying to him about something else is literally painful to think about. I’ll tell him the truth that I’m not comfortable working for his father and I’d rather pick up a job somewhere else.
He’ll understand.
I step in a safe place, other than the middle of the walkway to the subway tunnel, and pull up my email. Sure enough, it’s the offer letter from his company. I open it figuring I’ll reply to the email, politely declining, until my eye lands on the salary figure.
Holy shit!
The salary that is listed is more than what I’d make in a year working full-time at the rate I do now.
Even I can admit it would be insane to turn down an offer like this. I throw my head back and let out a frustrated laugh at how crazy life is. I call Alyssa back and let her know that I will meet her to get a few things. I haven’t worked in the corporate world for over two years but seeing the offer letter officially and reading over the rest of the email about how image and conveying professionalism is held in the upmost importance, I realize I’m diving back in headfirst and I might as well look the part.
The day goes by quickly after I meet up with Alyssa. We end up getting the majority of our buys from New York and Company. I was planning on getting button-ups and colorful blouses and some cute black ballet wedges but Alyssa balks at the things I pick up.
“Madison, I’ve been to Jackson’s office before. This isn’t a quirky little startup or mom and pop. Jackson’s company is legit and the people there, let’s just say, are dressed to impress. This is New York City—it’s a fashion show,” she tells me and I notice that she’s picked out slim-fitting pencil skirts, form-fitting blouses, and tall pumps. I gulp and then think of how Parker typically looks when we meet up for her long lunches. I realize she’s right. I sigh, putting my items back.
When we get home Alex is still at work and I’m exhausted. We order a pizza and Alyssa continues to chat about how excited she is and how glad she is I’m starting with her. I continue to try to mimic her excitement. I pull out a bottle of wine and use it to nurse my anxiety, and within an hour I’m asleep. I don’t wake up until I’m in Alex’s arms and he’s carrying me to our bedroom.
“Hey babe,” I say through a yawn.
“Long day?” he asks after kissing me on the forehead. I grin like a Cheshire cat. I love when he kisses me like this.
“I went shopping with your sister,” I tell him and he laughs.
“Very long day then.” He places me gently on the bed.
“What about you?” I ask as he begins undressing.
“No complaints,” he replies as I admire his sculpted physique.
“How tired are you?” he asks with a sexy smirk and a mischievous glint in his eye. I push myself off the bed and jump on his waist. He laughs before a sensual grin finds his lips.
“I’m never too tired for that,” I tell him before taking his lips in mine, and we both fall into bed. The last thing on my mind is sleep.
I spent the rest of the weekend trying not to think about Monday and my first day in the office, but since the day is now here, my anxiety is dialed up to eleven. It’s been a long time since I’ve had to go into an office and I groan inwardly as my alarm clock screams at 6 am. We don’t start until 9 but I need time to shower as well as do my hair and makeup, since appearances are everything at Jackson’s firm apparently. I manage to curl my hair, put on some makeup, and slip my pearl earrings onto my ears, all by 7:45. When I come out of the bathroom, Alex is sitting up in bed; he whistles at me and I blush.
“Look at you. Think I can convince you to come back to bed for a little while?”
“You could, easily,” I tell him, slipping on a pair of high-heeled black pumps. “So I wouldn’t tempt me.”
“But I love tempting you,” he says, looking like a Calvin Klein model in his underwear, sans shirt.
“I haven’t had my coffee yet, so I wouldn’t test the limits of my resolve. Alyssa and I need to leave soon anyway,” I tell him with a sigh.
&n
bsp; “Nothing like bringing up family members to make my morning wood go away,” Alex grumbles, sliding back under the sheets. “I guess I’ll have to convince you to come to bed later.”
I go to sit next to him on the bed, letting my gaze drift over his naked torso for a minute before glancing back up at his face. “You really are sexy, you know that?”
“Yep!” he says cheerfully. “But it’s all for you now.”
“I love every bit of it.” I lean forward to kiss him, my hand pressed against his smooth, muscled chest, and I’m aching to get undressed and take advantage of that morning arousal he mentioned.
“I’ll see you tonight,” he whispers. “Good luck, babe.”
Alyssa is waiting for me when I come out of the bedroom, and I’m honestly shocked at her appearance. She’s wearing a navy blue pencil skirt, cream-colored peplum blouse and matching blue blazer, with heels and her hair carefully brushed, curled, and tucked behind her ears. She’s wearing light makeup and mascara, her nails are trimmed, and she has on the same black studs in her ears from the other night.
Alyssa is stunning, her and her brother have beautiful genes.
“Wow!” I tell her and she playfully rolls her eyes.
“You look just as good,” she giggles.
“Come on, I need coffee sooo bad,” I tell her
She’s in agreement, and we both head out. There’s a coffee shop a few buildings down from our apartment, and we stop in there quickly—I grab a cinnamon latte and a bagel with cream cheese that I can eat on the go, and Alyssa gets some sweet iced coffee and a chocolate croissant. I enviously watch her down it, remembering the days when I, could eat anything I wanted without a second thought or a trip to the gym.
We’re mostly quiet on the subway ride to the financial district. Alyssa is tapping her heels as we get closer, clearly nervous, and I’m starting to feel actual nerves too, that have nothing to do with Jackson. It’s been a long time since I’ve worked in a brick and mortar office, and I’m sure that Jackson’s business will be much larger and more upscale than where I was in the past.
That turns out to be an understatement.
From the moment I walk in, I have a fresh understanding of exactly how wealthy Jackson is. The offices are a joint collaboration between his marketing agency and his real estate business, and everything about it screams money—but tastefully. The building is all glass and steel, with magnificent views of the city, and when we walk in we’re immediately greeted by a polished blonde woman at the mahogany and black lacquered reception desk.
We introduce ourselves quickly and she gives us badges, directing us up to the floor where we’ll be working. I don’t expect to see Jackson, but to my surprise he comes out of a conference room almost as soon as we appear out of the elevator. He’s wearing a crisp blue button-down shirt, paired with a light blue tie, his thick hair neatly styled. He looks incredibly amazing and as the waft of his cologne finds my nostrils it takes me back to another time.
“Hi Jackson. I mean, Mr. Scully,” she says, correcting herself as she shakes his hand. He gives her a charming smile and then turns to me. I can’t help but notice as his eyes do a quick rove over me.
“Hello Mr. Scully,” I tell him gluing my eyes on the window past him.
“Glad you’re here Madison,” he says, his voice deep but tight.
“I just wanted to welcome you both myself,” he says and I’m grateful as his attention is turned to Alyssa. Soon a beautiful brown-skinned black woman has appeared by his side. She’s tall with big curly hair done in a bun. She’s wearing a mustard yellow tight-fitted pencil dress paired with sky high red heels. I’m so glad I listened to Alyssa about my wardrobe choice. I would have been oddly out of place in my demure little quirky outfit. “Ladies this is Tamera Henderson, head of HR. I’ll leave you to her,” he says and they exchange warm smiles before he disappears.
“Hello ladies, welcome to Scully Enterprises.” She greets us and we do the same.
“If you’ll follow me we’ll just go over your paperwork and a few policies and we should be done in time for you both to attend the morning meeting.” We follow her to her office and she finalizes our paperwork, also letting us know who our supervisor is. She then gives us a quick tour of the office, which only becomes more impressive as it goes on, and then drops us off at a large conference room for the meeting. Me and Alyssa both get settled in and before long the office is filled with chic women all impeccably dressed and men in expensive suits with groomed hair and pricey watches.
Even more than that, as they come in I can feel numerous eyes on us, sizing us up, but Alyssa and I remain cool, calm, and friendly. When Jackson comes in his eyes briefly land on me as he’s approached by several different people who pull him into quick conversations. Soon after he sits, I feel his eyes on me as people begin to speak about quarter reports and upcoming events. Our gazes meet a few through the entirety of the meeting—that is, until Tamera introduces Alyssa and I to the team, and he keeps his eyes strictly on Alyssa. He then stands and closes out the meeting with some key points. He’s charismatic and authoritative. The women watch him mesmerized, including Alyssa, who is looking up at him with wide, eager eyes as he talks. She’s eating up every word he says, and none of it is that interesting, but Jackson has that effect. After the meeting closes Tamera introduces me and Alyssa to our supervisor, Jane, a petite redhead with a warm smile but big presence.
“Welcome ladies, we’re so glad to have you here. I’ve heard great things,” she says, her eyes landing on me. My skin flushes. We follow her to our cubicles, which aren’t the ordinary cubed grey ones I last worked in. They are circular and have clear glass with large iMacs in the center.
“This is where you ladies will be stationed. Alyssa, if you’ll come down with me so I can introduce you to the head of admin and Madison, Mr. Scully would like to go over a few things with you.”
My stomach sinks. Of course the day wouldn’t be easy. Why does he want to see me? Oh, I can think of a few reasons. But I hope that we are just going to continue to ignore them.
“His office is at the corner,” she tells me before her and Alyssa head in the other direction. I head to the office, my chest feeling tighter with each step. When I go in he stands and asks me to close the door behind me. When I do I take a few seconds to gather myself before turning to face him. He stands from his desk and an eternity seems to pass before either of us say anything.
“I’m glad you’re here,” he says softly. I swallow hard, my heart starting to pound.
“I’m just here because it’s a good job.” My voice is stiff, every line in my body tense. He’s walking towards me now and I find myself stepping backwards until my back hits the door. I don’t want him to come closer—I don’t want to have to think about what it means that I still feel a flutter in my stomach when he’s nearby, or to think about the dream I had. He stops and nods, acknowledging my unsaid request for space, yet steps closer to me anyway.
“I know that the circumstances aren’t ideal.” His tone is more somber than I expected.
“’Aren’t ideal’ is an understatement, Jackson,” I say, staring at the floor.
“You could have declined the offer,” he says, his voice slightly raised.
I scowl at him. “You could have not offered or said you were fully staffed. You’re the reason I’m here, it’s not the other way around.” I scoff at him and a hint of a smile passes on his face. He always liked when I get riled up. I try to grab hold of my composure.
“My career is important to me, and I think this can help it. Alex thinks so too.” I thrust his name out like a shield, reminding Jackson who I’m with. I see the slightest flinch as he hears his name and I see it now…he’s not as easy about this as he’s pretended to be.
“I take it you’ve decided not to tell him,” he says cautiously. I nod so slightly I’m not sure if he picks up on it.
“Thank you,” he says, sounding like the most relieved man on the planet.
“I love my son, Madison. We’ve had some tough times, some miscommunications, but things are better now. My family is coming back together. And that means a lot to me.” I only slightly nod waiting to be dismissed.
“I know you hate me now.” He pauses, as if waiting for me to correct him.
I don’t hate him but he makes me hate myself so I don’t correct him.
He takes a step closer to me, and I can smell his expensive cologne, and the starch in his suit. There was a time when I wouldn’t have been able to resist him, when I would have let him have me here in this conference room, and loved every second of it.
But that was before I knew he was married.
Before I fell in love with a much better man.
From the look on his face he knows what would happen if this was a different time. His expression is full of pain, his eyes full of lust, and the air full of tension. I feel those old, familiar flutters in my stomach, and I fight not to show it, not to close my eyes or show any weakness.
“I just have to know. If things were different…”
I frown. Because it doesn’t matter if a really stupid part of me still wants him, even a little bit. Or if I have memories of all the ways the handsome man in front of me made me feel, every way he touched me.That’s over. My body may be weak for him, the memory of how he did things to me with his lips, fingers, and other parts I won’t think about…but my heart is firmly with Alex.
“If you weren’t married, if I wasn’t in love with your son, if you weren’t who you are, if things could have been different, then who the hell knows, Jackson. But none of that matters now. What matters is that we’ve agreed that this will never, ever get out,” I tell him, breaking the spell that is attempting to wrap around us.
He still looks pained, but he concedes and walks back and sits behind his large desk.
“Does anyone else know?” he asks. I swallow hard. All of a sudden his face breaks into a disbelieving, angry sneer.