“And as soon as Pernella got sick, did you call me? No, it was Callum.”
“He’s the closest thing Millie has to a dad. Of course I’d call him.”
“But he isn’t, is he? And if he has his way, no one else will ever be.”
“Not at this rate. I think it’s time for you to leave.”
“So, you’ve made a fool out of me, and now you’re kicking me out. Nice.”
Emmeline went to the door and held it open as Joel stormed though. As soon as he was on the other side, she slammed it shut.
Jerk.
The phone rang again. She picked it up without thinking.
“Are you okay?” asked a very concerned Callum.
“Yes!” she shouted. “Arggg. I don’t know, I think Joel and I just broke up. Do you have any idea how jealous he is of you?”
“Me?”
“Yes. It’s crazy. He just lost his mind when you called, completely unreasonable.”
“Is he upset about the bakery?”
“Yes, well, no.” Emmeline started to explain the trip and what happened over the past few days.
“You did the right thing. Any guy who would react like that isn’t worth it. You wouldn’t want to be away and then have jerk decide he didn’t like something and leave you stranded.”
“I don’t think he’d do that. I’m hoping he’s just disappointed. Doesn’t excuse him for accusing me of cheating on him with you.”
“Want me to come over? We could fool around a bit and put his fears to rest once and for all.”
“You are not helping. This is probably the reason why Joel is so jealous.”
Callum chuckled on the other end.
“Callum,” Emmeline began. She waited a moment, and then said, “When you say those things, are you actually serious?”
There was no answer on the other end.
Chapter 41
The silence on the other end of the phone was killing her. “Well, Callum? I feel like an idiot, but I seriously need to know.” She shifted her weight uncomfortably back and forth as she waited for a response.
“Emmeline, you know me, probably better than anyone else, and I didn’t think there was anything in this world that I wouldn’t do for you until now. But while you’re mad about some other guy, still hung up on him, I’m not going to answer that question.”
Emmeline’s mouth flopped open. She knew it was true; her heart thought it was going to stop. She slowly slid her back down the wall behind her until she sat in a slump on the floor. “Callum, I…I just thought, I mean, after all this time, I never actually thought…”
“Listen, we can talk about this some other time, maybe when you’ve calmed down and Joel is out of your system. I’ve made a lot of mistakes over the years, but I am not going to make this one.”
“You are too good to us.”
“No, no I’m not. Listen, I’m no saint. And maybe I should have said whatever it is I should have said a long time ago, but I didn’t. Let’s just for the moment leave it as: we have fun together, and I am there for the two of you. I would really like to change the subject now. Please. I promise, we’ll have this conversation—one day.”
Emmeline bit her lip. She was just going to have to accept that as her answer—for now. It didn’t matter, though. She knew the truth; it was clear for the first time. Callum’s flirting, his need to be there. Joel had been right, Callum wanted her. Didn’t excuse Joel from being a jerk, but perhaps his jealousy might be well-founded.
She breathed slowly, taking it all in. The past twenty-four hours had practically given her whiplash. Joel, agreeing to go on that amazing trip, then realizing that she couldn’t. Millie’s news, Callum. Her body felt electric, her mind buzzing frantically from one thing to another with no control. Did she feel for Callum what he felt for her? She couldn’t tell. She was so messed up right now she couldn’t tell her left from her right, up from down, love from lust—or even from friendship. Callum was right, she needed to get her bearings. There would be plenty of time after she moved to her new home to figure things out.
She didn’t want to mess everything up any more than she already had. For now, all she needed to do was focus on the direction her life was pulling her: east. Back to her hometown, home to her parents, where perhaps they could patch up years of damage. Home to where her friends were, home to finally deal with Nicholas’s family, a nightmare she had been avoiding for years. She never asked again how they were doing. If they were even still there? How was Erik? Emmeline had left Port Hope and never looked back, never imagining that she would ever return.
Emmeline hung up the phone, emotionally exhausted. She crawled up the stairs and under her covers, stopping only to peek in on Millie, who had slept straight through the drama. At least she had shielded Millie from most of it.
Emmeline pulled the covers over her head. It felt like only a second had passed when she felt Millie’s cold toes under them beside her.
“Pancakes, please,” said the bright-eyed little girl an inch from Emmeline’s face.
Emmeline groaned. “How about cereal?”
“It’s Saturday. Saturdays are pancake days, not cereal days, silly.”
“Do you think that we could make an exception today?”
“Mo-om!” Millie said, drawing the word out. Emmeline knew she was beat. Pancakes it was—again.
Defeated, she threw on a housecoat, the one she wore when she was feeling like crap. It was soft and warm, with small little flowers on it. She slowly walked down the stairs.
“Mom, did I tell you I have to be at the theater this morning at ten?”
Emmeline peeked at the clock. “Okay,” she said, grateful there was still a couple of hours before then. She absentmindedly started to make the recipe that she had done a million times since Millie first discovered her undying adoration for pancakes.
“Millie, what would you say if we had a chance to open up our very own bakery?” Perhaps while she was feeling like this, it wasn’t a good idea to ask. Yet she couldn’t help it; things needed to be dealt with.
“Mommy! That would be amazing!” Millie hopped and skipped around the kitchen.
“What if we needed to move so that we could do it?”
“Move where?”
“Anywhere.” Emmeline wanted to test the waters first.
“But what about Grammy Pernella?”
“Grammy Pernella isn’t moving back in here. She’s staying where she is. We’ve gone over this.”
“This is where her room is. This is her house. She is coming back.” Millie’s skipping had stopped, and she put her hands on her tiny hips.
“Sweetie. Life changes. That means Pernella’s does too.”
Millie grunted in disgust.
“Listen, we all have to try new things. So tell me, what do you think of us going on a new adventure?”
“Maybe…”
“Nothing is settled at the moment. I would just like to hear what you think. Moving wouldn’t be so bad, would it?”
“Maybe…”
“I was thinking about the building that we inherited back in Port Hope. It’s right downtown. It would be perfect for a bakery. We could live there too.”
“I have never lived in Port Hope.”
“Yes, you have, but when you were a baby.”
“I think I like it here.”
“But it’s time for us to start thinking about what is best for us. I think moving to Port Hope would be really good for us.”
Millie scowled, and Emmeline changed the subject. That was good enough for now. They ate their breakfast together, and then Emmeline reluctantly got dressed. She checked her phone on and off to see if Joel had called. She had no idea what she’d say if he even did, and she wasn’t sure what was worse, him calling, or the cold silence.
She dropped Millie off and promised to take her to see Pernella after class. Instead of waiting around, Emmeline drove back home in a daze. She walked into the dining room and sat on one of the blue an
d white upholstered chairs. The pictures she had done were still scattered on the table. She picked each one up and examined them. Was this truly what she wanted?
She knew in her gut it was. It didn’t make her feel any better. This whole thing was scary. What if she failed? She could put their entire future in jeopardy.
***
She picked Millie up a few hours later, and drove over to the nursing home. They found Pernella in her fourth-floor room, dressed in black tights and a sparkly sweatshirt that hung off her shoulder.
“Who broke you guys?” Pernella asked immediately.
“What are you talking about?” Emmeline asked, trying to cover up what she was feeling inside.
“Oh Grammy! Mommy says you’re really not coming home,” cried Millie.
“Millie! What is it that you are bubbling about? I am home!”
“No, you’re not,” Millie said defiantly.
“Millie, this is my home. I am happy here. Aren’t you happy for me?”
Millie little lip jutted forward, and Pernella patted her knee, signaling her to come over and sit on it. Millie did, and Pernella wrapped her arms around her waist and then kissed her on the head. “What else is going on?”
“Mommy told me that we might be moving too.”
“I know, sweetie pie. You and your mommy have a great chance to do something wonderful. I am so happy for you.”
Emmeline had talked this through with Pernella a few times over the past few days.
“But it’s in some town that I haven’t been to since I was a baby.” Millie was losing her bravado, starting to sound upset. “I don’t want to go.”
“Your mom told me her plan a little while ago,” Pernella replied, sitting up straighter. “It’s back in your old world. I don’t think it will be a problem. You’ll get to know your grandparents better, you’ll get to see where your mommy lived when she was a little girl. You know strife brings out your truth.”
Emmeline stiffened. These were the words that she needed to hear too, and yet didn’t want to. Millie looked at Pernella like she was from Mars.
“Now, Emmeline, your turn. Confess. What is going on with you?”
“Perhaps it’s been too much strife these days. Joel and I broke up last night. He wasn’t exactly excited about the bakery.”
“If he wasn’t excited about your dreams then he was a complete idiot, love.”
“I don’t know. Perhaps I’m getting in over my head. Pernella, are you sure you don’t want to move home?” Suddenly that felt like the best thing. Things could just stay the same. The idea was warm and comforting.
Pernella looked at the two of them in amazement. “Did you guys expect me to prop you up and make you feel better just because things are changing?”
“Grammy, we can’t leave you!” whined Millie.
“And that is your excuse for not moving on with your life?” Pernella gave them both the stink eye.
Emmeline glanced at Millie, who wore the same sheepish expression.
“Well…” Emmeline began.
“I think you should go. I am nobody’s crutch,” said Pernella. “Have I not taught you anything?”
“You have, but…” Emmeline started again.
“Nope. Out you go, and come back when you’re not feeling sorry for yourself.”
Emmeline knew Pernella was right. She was about to embark on her dream, and all she could do was be miserable.
“Millie,” Emmeline said, picking up her daughter’s hand. “I am nervous too. Do you think that perhaps we could try and be brave?”
Millie forced a nod.
“Millie, why don’t you tell Grammy all about the play?”
That took up an entire hour, as she gave her all the details about the play and her ideas on how to make it better. She beamed as she told Pernella that she was getting to direct an entire scene, and the theater school had never let a seven-year-old do that before. She was the first.
“You’re a trailblazer, girl,” Pernella praised her.
When they left that afternoon, Emmeline decided she needed to get out of her funk. She spent the rest of the day working on bakery details, the boring ones that made her head hurt—finances, move-in dates, insurance policies—and sent it all on to Ginny to double check.
She brought up her courage and called Joel that night. She wanted him to be happy on his trip. She wanted him to live it to the fullest, and if he wanted to, when he came back, they could see what could happen from there. Joel was still mad.
“You’re just trying to get rid of me!” he accused her. “No. wait, I’m being a jerk. I really wanted you to come. I really am going to miss you. I really want you to come.”
“I can’t, it isn’t the time for me to pick up and leave. You need to understand this. I don’t want to leave everything so miserable. What we had was pretty good.”
“Had. That’s a horrible word.”
“It just has to be like this.” Tears burned the corners of her eyes. She forced them back; no more crying. Time to woman up.
“No changing your mind?”
“No changing my mind. I’ve relied on other people my whole life; it’s time for that to change.”
“I love you.”
“I love you too. I need to go. I just didn’t want you to go with us still in a fight.”
Joel was quiet for a moment, and then said, “Goodbye, Emmeline Hope.”
“Goodbye, Joel.”
Emmeline buried herself for the next few hours in laundry and dishes. She and Millie watched a movie, and before she went to bed she called Callum. He made her laugh, and she felt better than she ever imagined she’d feel at that moment.
Chapter 42
The next month passed in a blur of meetings with the bank and lawyers and a million calls back and forth with Ginny, who helped guide her through the process. Emmeline snuck down to Port Hope while Millie was in school to sign official papers with the law firm her grandmother had dealt with, and was given a set of keys. Ginny and Callum were by her side as she gazed on the vacant building that she now officially owned. The outside brick had been painted blue, probably eighty years ago, and it was attached on either side to similarly styled buildings. A large picture window still had the historical society’s logo on the front; that most definitely would have to come down soon. Emmeline had no idea how to do that, but Callum was already giving her advice. Not on style, but on how to take the sign down, how to fix the wooden door, and how to reframe the window for better impact.
Emmeline pulled out the key the lawyer’s office had just given her. She jiggled the key into the lock and pulled open the door. A large, open room with dingy white floors greeted her. The walls were a pale gray, and in some places screws that probably hung pictures were still present. A plastic chair that had been left behind lay on its side.
“It needs a little work to make it look like the pictures you showed me, but there’s a lot of space,” said Ginny optimistically.
Emmeline let her breath out. It wasn’t half bad. There would be plenty of room for tables and chairs along with a counter and a prime spot to showcase her pastries. She had scanned the street before coming in, and didn’t see anything else like what she wanted to open here. At the back, there were two doors leading into what looked like offices that shared a wall.
Anxiously, Emmeline turned to Callum. “Do you think we could knock down the wall in between the offices to make one big kitchen?”
He looked around and examined the walls. He was familiar with buildings like these. His shop wasn’t all too different.
“As long as you don’t knock this main wall here down, it would be fine.”
A happy glow spread through Emmeline’s stomach. This would work.
Other than the two offices and a tiny bathroom, which was really good news—something Emmeline wouldn’t have to pay to put in—one last door stood open. She peeked through and found a staircase leading upstairs. “Let’s go see what’s up there,” Emmeline said, feeling
adventurous.
According to what the lawyer had explained earlier, there was an apartment up there that hadn’t been rented out for years. Emmeline clenched her jaw as she reached the top stair and the overwhelming blandness of the apartment became apparent. It wasn’t exactly glamorous, and it looked like no one had even tried to update the decor since 1972. Ginny made some very loud gagging sounds.
“It could be worse,” Callum said, opening and closing the cabinets that looked as though they were in decent shape.
“Paint, maybe that would help,” Emmeline said, running her hand along the countertops; at least they were clean. She knew it would be a long time before they could do any sort of renovations up here. Every little bit she was hoping to get as a loan from the bank would have to go to renovating the downstairs to transform it into her business. She needed to put in a whole new kitchen from scratch, and there was no way that was going to be cheap.
Besides the kitchen in the apartment, there were two bedrooms, a full bathroom, and a living room. ”I have to admit, it isn’t pretty, especially not compared to Pernella’s house, but it will fit us perfectly. There’s that at least.” She paused, worry like a cloud floated through her brain. “I hope Millie will like it. She’s still not happy about the whole thing. I promised that we won’t move until the summer.”
“She’ll come around,” Callum soothed her.
“I hope so. She’s mad that she fought so hard to get Director Anthony to take her seriously and let her direct, and now she’s leaving. I don’t blame her. If this wasn’t such a perfect opportunity, I wouldn’t leave Oakville.”
“You know, there’s a theater just around the corner. She could walk there. They put on plays with the kids all the time,” Ginny said.
“Is that still there?” Emmeline asked. At least that would be something she could use to convince Millie that this move would be a good one.
“Trust me, everything is exactly as it was. Everything!”
“Ginny, it’s not that bad,” Callum said, faking insult.
Crush: A YA Romance Collection Page 68