Crush: A YA Romance Collection

by Lavinia Leigh

  “Right.”

  “But we probably know each other better than every couple at school combined.”

  He smiles. “I know.”

  Does that mean he’s decided he doesn’t want to be in a relationship with me?

  “Yet you keep surprising me.”

  “How?” I’m not exactly daring or spontaneous.

  “Because no matter what, you are who you are.”

  “I don’t follow.” I wish he’d just spit it out already because I’m not sure my heart can take this.

  “As soon as I asked Meredith out, she changed. She turned into…” I can tell he’s searching for a polite word for slut. “She offered to sleep with me on the first date.”

  “Oh my God! Did you?” I can’t help asking. I don’t want him to be the kind of guy who would do that.

  “No, and that made her try harder.” He raises my chin so I’m looking in his eyes. “It’s hard to want something if it’s thrown in your face.”

  I smile and then lower my lips to his.

  An hour later, he walks me downstairs. It was the perfect day of listening to music, dancing, and kissing. Just kissing. Which is enough. For now.

  “You want to study tonight?”

  “No, better skip it. Tori is going to want to fill me in on every detail of her date. You might want to let Ryder know that I’m going to hear how good a kisser he is and other things that he probably doesn’t want me to know.”

  “I think I’ll spare him that humiliation.” He pulls the front door open and leans down to kiss me again.

  I pull away from the kiss to see Meredith standing on the front porch.

  “Oh my God!” she shrieks.

  Chapter 16

  My heart stops. Just stops. Meredith is staring at us like she’s seen a ghost. Maybe she has because I sure feel like I died.

  “You? How?” Her hand is on her chest like she’s having trouble breathing. I can relate.

  “Um, this isn’t what it looks like.” I look at Toby for help, but he opens the door wider and motions for Meredith to come in.

  “No. I don’t want to step into whatever this is.” She motions between us. Toby reaches for her and pulls her inside. I step out of the way, wanting to sink right into the floor.

  Toby shuts the door, closing us all inside. “Meredith, this is the girl I was telling you about. See? I’m not making her up.”

  “But it’s Becca! Becca Daniels!” She gestures to me as if Toby isn’t sure who I am. “I mean, how could you?”

  It’s the Barbie lunchbox all over again, but this is so much worse.

  Toby steps toward me. “Why not? Becca’s amazing.”

  “She’s—” Meredith turns away and presses her hands to the sides of her head. “I don’t even know what to make of this.”

  “Meredith, please.” I can’t believe I’m about to beg her, of all people, but that’s exactly what’s going to happen. “You can’t mention this to Tori. She doesn’t know.” I’m still pissed at Tori, but that doesn’t mean I want to lose her as a friend.

  She lowers her hands and turns back to us. “No, she doesn’t, does she?” She looks back and forth between us. “Is that why Ryder took her out today? To help you two sneak around?”

  “No!” My God. Why does she think so little of me? “Ryder likes Tori.”

  “Sure. It’s like I stepped into bizarro world. Ryder and Tori, you and Toby. It’s insane. You get that, don’t you? You must or you wouldn’t be sneaking around.” She steps toward Toby. “Why? Why would you leave me for her?”

  He backs away from her. “I didn’t leave you. We were never together.”

  “Oh, so I guess we weren’t sleeping together? I must have imagined that.” She looks at me, making sure I know what happened between them. I cringe. Hearing it from her is too much to take. “You got me to sleep with you and then you tossed me to the curb. You’re no better than―”

  “That’s not what happened and you know it. We hung out for a while, but it didn’t work out. That’s it. I’m sorry if you got hurt, but I don’t know what you want me to say.” Toby’s voice is small, like he realizes for the first time just how much he hurt Meredith. Maybe he’ll see his “no relationship” thing isn’t working for anyone but him.

  “You could say you didn’t give us a fair chance. You always had other girls hanging around. You never committed to just me. Not even after we…” Meredith’s eyes are full of tears, and I can’t help feeling sorry for her.

  “I was honest with you from the start. I’m not sure what else I could’ve done. I don’t feel the same way. I’m sorry, but it’s true.” Toby takes a step toward me. “I like Becca. I have for a year.”

  “For a year?” Meredith practically screams. Oh, Toby, that was so not the right thing to say. “So you were with me and wishing I was her?” She jabs her finger in my direction. At least I can understand her hating me after that revelation.

  “Maybe we should all sit down.” I’m not sure how that will help, but I can’t think of anything else to do.

  “You sit down.” It’s a weak insult for Meredith, but she’s not exactly herself right now, so I throw her a bone and pretend the comment stings.

  “Um, okay.” I sit down in the armchair next to me.

  Meredith moves toward Toby, and at first I think she’s going to shove him or slap him across the face. But she places her hands on his chest. He couldn’t look more uncomfortable. “Why? Why can’t you see that I’m the perfect girl for you? Everyone else does.” She turns her head and looks at me. “What does she have that I don’t?”

  Morals? But then again, I’m sneaking around with my best friend’s brother. My morals aren’t exactly model worthy right now.

  “I don’t want to hurt you any more than I already have. I’m really sorry, but I can’t change how I feel, and I don’t see how telling you why I like Becca is going to make you feel any better.”

  “You want me to feel better?” She leans toward him, so close their faces are almost touching. I grip the armrest of the chair and wonder why Toby isn’t pushing her away. “Go out with me tonight. Give me a chance to show you what a big mistake you made.”

  “Why, so you can throw yourself at him again?” Before I can realize what I’m doing, I’m on my feet and tugging her away from Toby. “That worked so well for you last time.”

  She lunges for me, but Toby grabs my waist and pulls me away.

  “This isn’t happening,” he says, positioning himself between us. “Meredith, I’m not dating you. It’s over. I’m with Becca. You’re just going to have to accept that.”

  She’s breathing so heavily her entire body is heaving. “You think so?” Oh, this isn’t going to be good. “Tori has no idea what you two have been doing. But that can change.”

  Toby lets go of me, and we exchange a worried look.

  Meredith scoffs. “That’s what I thought. So let me tell you what’s going to happen.”

  “Meredith—”

  “Shut up, Becca. I’m talking. I’ll keep my mouth shut about what I saw here today on one condition.”

  “One really big condition, right?” Toby asks.

  “See, you do know me well.”

  “Just spit it out already.” She’s only prolonging the torture. Just drop the bomb already.

  “Toby and I are getting back together. This”—she points between Toby and me—”is over.”

  Toby crosses his arms. “Forget it. You’re not telling me who I can date.”

  “Fine. Then I’ll have a little talk with my old friend Tori.”

  As much as Tori hates Meredith, I can’t risk Tori believing her. Especially because it’s true. I won’t be able to deny a flat-out accusation from my best friend. It’s going to kill me, but I have to go along with this.

  “Toby, you have to do it,” I say, shocking both him and Meredith.

  Meredith laughs. “Funny, but I never thought you’d be the sensible one, Becca.”

  Toby turn
s to me. “What are you saying? You want to end this?”

  “No, but if she tells Tori, it’s over anyway.” Looking into his baby blue eyes is painful. This isn’t what I want at all.

  “I’m not giving you up that easily. I’ve waited too long to finally be with you.”

  I want to kiss him so badly, but I know better than to piss off Meredith any more than she already is.

  Toby turns to Meredith. “One date. That’s it. And then you’ll see we aren’t right for each other and it’s over.”

  “Not good enough.” Meredith crosses her arms. “One date isn’t going to cut it, and I’m not going out with you just so you can dump me again.”

  “I’m not kissing you or doing anything else with you. So if that’s what you’re looking for, you can forget it.” I’ve never seen Toby look this agitated. He’s always so together. It breaks my heart more because I can see whatever this is between us means just as much to him as it does to me.

  “Fine, but you will hold my hand and make it look like we’re the perfect, happy couple.”

  “Why would you do that?” I ask. It seems worse than not having Toby at all.

  “Have you seen what my life has become since he decided I wasn’t good enough for him?” Her face is red with rage.

  “That’s not what happened,” Toby says.

  “Just shut up. I don’t want to hear it. I want my old life back. I want my old friends back. But everyone is too busy looking at me like I’m Toby’s latest castoff. They either look down on me or pity me. I can’t stand it. I’m going to rise to the top again, and you’re going to help me do it.”

  “So this is about your reputation at school?” Why am I not surprised? I was stupid to think that she really loved Toby. Of course she doesn’t. All she cares about is her social status.

  “Word of caution, Becca.” Meredith lowers her arms and steps right in front of me. “Toby doesn’t exactly live up to the hype.” She looks him up and down and laughs. “Which is why after a few weeks, once my reputation is fully restored, I’ll be dumping you—rather publicly.” She smiles. “Then you can see what it feels like to plummet down the social ladder. I’m sure Becca will be waiting for you at the bottom.”

  “Get out,” Toby says. “I’m not going along with this, so just leave.”

  “Fine.” Meredith starts for the door. “So, Ryder and Tori went to the movies, right? I’m sure I’ll be able to find them.”

  “Wait!” I rush toward her and grab her arm. She eyes my fingers and shrugs them off. I turn back to Toby. “Please, just do what she wants. It’s only for appearance’s sake.” I look to Meredith for confirmation. “Right? That’s all this is?”

  She nods. “He’ll have to kiss me in public. For appearance’s sake, of course.”

  God, I want to smack her so hard! “Give us a minute.” I take Toby’s hand and lead him into the dining room.

  “You can’t be serious about this, Bec.”

  “I don’t know what else to do.” I squeeze his hand, not wanting to ever let go. I just got him. I can’t lose him already. “Are you ready for Tori to find out about us? Because I’m not. I don’t want to lose her. Or you.”

  “You don’t think the longer we hang out behind her back the worse it will be?”

  “I can’t imagine spending time with you could ever be a bad thing.”

  He smiles and brushes my cheek with his thumb. “You know that’s not what I meant.”

  The only way I could see Tori accepting me and Toby was if we were in love, but it’s way too soon for that. I’m in “great like,” but that won’t be enough for Tori. She’ll assume I’m just like every other girl who falls all over herself for Toby.

  “This could buy us some time to figure things out.”

  “And you’re okay with me pretending to be Meredith’s boyfriend?” The word boyfriend is like a curse coming off his lips.

  “No, but I’ll deal with it.”

  He lets out a long breath. “I don’t know if I can deal with it.”

  “I know it sucks, but it’s only for a few weeks.”

  “That’s longer than most of my relationships.” He forces a laugh.

  “You don’t get in relationships, remember?” It’s stupid to push him at a time like this, but I can’t help it. I need to know all this is worth it.

  “I was hoping to change that.” His face reddens a little. I’ve never seen him look so nervous.

  The pain in my gut is overwhelming, but I force a smile and say, “Good. That should make it easier to get through the next few weeks then.”

  “If you say so, but you’re not the one pretending to date Meredith.”

  I laugh. “I would have if she asked.”

  He cracks a smile. “You’d pretend to be a lesbian just to avoid telling my sister we’re dating?”

  I shrug. “What can I say? I’m desperate.”

  “We both must be.” He pulls me in for a hug. “This is all so crazy. Why does my sister have to be a possessive control freak?”

  “That’s your twin and my best friend you’re talking about.”

  “Okay, why does my twin and your best friend have to be a possessive control freak?”

  He knows that’s not what I meant, but I laugh anyway. We’re both screwed and we know it. We have to take whatever little humor there is in the situation and milk it for all it’s worth.

  “So I guess we’ll have to stick to our tutoring sessions and not plan any other get-togethers until this is over, huh?”

  “Looks like it.” He lets go of me. “One last kiss before I go make a deal with the devil?”

  I reach up on my toes, and he meets me halfway. The kiss is soft at first, but neither of us can control ourselves for long, and we soon end up a tangle of limbs. We don’t pull apart until we hear the front door slam shut.

  “Do you think she left?” I ask, licking my lips and tasting Toby’s minty gum.

  “I don’t know. Only one way to find out.”

  But before we can even leave the dining room, we hear Tori’s voice. “What the hell are you doing in my house?”

  Oh God! Why is she home? She’s supposed to be on her date with Ryder.

  “What do we do?” I ask Toby.

  He shrugs.

  “We can’t stay here. Meredith might rat us out.” I wave him on and head to the living room. “Hey, Tor.” I try to act normally, but my insides are on fire. Ryder is with her. “Cutting the date short?”

  She looks back and forth between me, Meredith, and Toby, who’s standing behind me. “What the hell is going on? You three are the last people I’d expect to find in my house together.”

  Meredith turns toward Toby and me and smiles. “Toby, care to tell your sister what’s going on here?”

  Chapter 17

  I swallow hard and wait for Toby to explain, but he looks between Meredith and me like he’s trying to decide what to do. He can’t possibly be thinking about telling Tori the truth. Not now. Not with Meredith and Ryder here. Tori will flip out and they’ll be witnesses.

  “What’s up, man? You lose your voice or something?” Ryder walks over and claps Toby on the back.

  Toby shakes his head and clears his throat. “No, I’m fine.” He meets Tori’s eyes. “Becca and I were studying, and then Meredith came over.”

  “Why?” Tori narrows her eyes at him.

  “Yeah, Toby.” Meredith gives him a great big smile. “Tell her why I’m here.” Her voice is sickeningly sweet.

  Toby takes a deep breath. “I asked Meredith to come over because I realized I made a mistake breaking up with her. She agreed to give me another chance.”

  Tori pushes Toby into the dining room for privacy, but she’s practically screaming, so it’s pointless. “What the hell? Meredith is a mega bitch! Why would you get back together with her? My God, you have the worst taste in girls!” She storms out of the dining room, not even giving him a chance to explain, and takes Ryder’s hand, pulling him upstairs.


  “That went well,” Meredith says.

  “Get out.” I’ve had enough. I’m having a hard enough time dealing with my feelings for Toby and what that will mean for my friendship with Tori. I don’t need Meredith’s crap right now.

  Toby steps out of the dining room and shrugs at me.

  “I don’t think so, Becca. Toby and I have a date tonight. Isn’t that right, Toby?”

  He shakes his head. “I’ll keep up appearances at school, but I’m not hanging out with you on weekends.”

  “And how would that look? Weekends are for dating. So. Let’s. Go.” She says the words slowly, making sure Toby hears them loud and clear.

  I look at Toby. I get that he wants to take a stand against Meredith, but I can’t lose him like this—even if it’s going to tear me apart inside to watch him pretend to be Meredith’s boyfriend. “Go to a movie. You won’t even have to talk to her.”

  “What about—?”

  I hold my hand up to stop him. Our date today is already ruined. “The sooner you start dating her again, the sooner this can all end.” I grab my jacket and walk to the door because my heart can’t handle any more today.

  “Becca,” Toby calls after me.

  I open the door and turn back to him, which is a huge mistake because the look in his eyes makes my insides ache.

  “I know this is all Hollywood movie cliché, but will you wait for me?”

  I manage a small smile and nod. I’ve waited for him for three years. What’s a few more weeks?

  ***

  I don’t get out of bed for the rest of the weekend. Mom asks if I’m sick again. Yeah, sick of lying, sick of sneaking around, sick of not being able to tell the world that I like Toby Michaels. I’m not looking forward to school on Monday and the big reunion between Toby and Meredith. Even though I know it’s not real, it’s still going to be painful to watch. With how popular they are, it will be all anyone is talking about. It’s not fair that a bitch like Meredith is getting exactly what she wants.

  Monday morning my alarm goes off for the third time and Mom walks in.

  “What’s going on? You never hit the snooze button.” She sits down on my bed and puts her hand on my forehead. “You don’t feel warm.”