“Does this mean we’re okay?” he asks.
“Yeah, but we have to do something. This can’t go on.”
“I agree.” He removes his hands from my waist and turns away.
“What’s wrong?”
“I can’t think straight when I’m touching you.”
I smile, loving that I have that effect on him.
“I’ll have to talk to Meredith. Tell her it’s over.”
“What’s over?” Meredith pulls the curtain aside and joins us backstage.
Toby whirls around to face her, and I take a step toward him. It’s not that I’m afraid of Meredith. I’m not. It’s just that Toby and I haven’t figured this out yet, and there’s no way she’s going to help us.
“What are you doing here?” he asks.
“Well, I was looking for you, and Jeff said he saw you heading toward the stage.” She looks at me. “Who knew I’d find both of you?”
“I never said I was going to stop seeing Becca.” Toby’s voice is strong, confident. I wish I felt the same way.
“And what would you have done if someone else walked in on you two doing…?” She looks between us.
“That’s not your concern,” Toby says.
“Oh I think it is, boyfriend.”
“Yeah, about that.” Toby steps toward her. “You have until the party on Saturday to break up with me.” He looks over his shoulder at me. “Because I’m taking Becca.”
“You are not! I say when this is over, Toby. Not you!”
He faces her again, not the least bit intimidated. “Not anymore. I’m telling Tori the truth. I’m only telling you first to be nice.”
I’ve never wanted to kiss him more.
“To be nice? Don’t do me any favors.” Meredith practically spits the words out.
“Okay, fine. We can tell everyone now. Becca and I will walk out of here holding hands, and it will all be over.”
“Like hell you will!” She looks at me. “Talk some sense into him before he ruins this for both of us.”
“Meredith, we’re being more than reasonable here. Just break up with Toby. He’s still willing to let you be the one to end it. Your reputation will remain intact.” She has to let this go.
“For like two seconds. You can’t show up at the party together. You two can’t start dating right after we break up. What will people think?”
Toby stands up straight and looks right at Meredith. “That’s not my problem. Or Becca’s.”
“Look,” I say. “If you don’t want it to look like Toby and I got together the second you broke up with him—”
“You mean dumped his ass.” She crosses her arms in front of her.
“Whatever. If you don’t want it to look that way, then do it soon. It’s Monday. That gives you five days until the party.”
“That’s still not enough time.”
Toby grabs my hand, lacing his fingers through mine. “Yeah, well it’s the most you’re going to get.”
Meredith shakes her head. “This is unbelievable. How am I going to explain this?” She holds up her necklace. “I just paraded this necklace around, talking about what a great boyfriend you are. What reason could I possibly give for dumping you right after you bought me an expensive gift?”
“I guess you shouldn’t have lied and said Toby gave it to you,” I say.
She scoffs. “Like you’re one to talk. You’ve been lying to your best friend for who knows how long. You’re no better than me, so don’t think for a second that you are. I’m the type of person who gets what she wants. You”—she looks down at me—”you’re nothing special.”
I never realized her hatred for me was this deep, but she clearly resents having me in her life. My house is bigger than hers. My parents have better jobs than hers. I never even thought about that, but clearly she has, and she’s been trying to make up for it ever since the Barbie lunchbox incident.
“You can’t talk to her like that,” Toby says. “And in case you haven’t noticed, you’re the only one who thinks you’re better than everyone else.”
She glares at him, and by the way her nostrils are flaring I can tell she’s barely holding it together. “I’ll find a way to make you out to be the bad guy, so be prepared. But I better not see the two of you together before I end this. Or I swear I’ll make you both regret it.” She storms out.
I squeeze Toby’s hand. “What do you think she’ll do?”
“No idea. But she’s pissed, so I’m sure it will be quite a show.”
I rack my brain, trying to think of something Meredith can use against him. And then it hits me—the ultimate payback for a desperate girl seeking revenge. The very thing Meredith brought up when she caught Toby and me together at his house. She thought Toby just used her for sex—made her sleep with him and then dumped her. Knowing Meredith, she’s willing to go to any lengths to keep her reputation. She won’t care that Toby will be destroyed in the process. “Oh God!”
“What?”
I don’t know how to tell him this, but I have to. He has to be ready. “She’s going to tell everyone you forced her to sleep with you.”
“What? I did not! She threw herself at me, and that was months ago.”
Months ago? “You haven’t…in months?”
“It happened once. Once. That’s all. And it wasn’t my idea.”
“So you didn’t break up with her right after you…?” I can’t bring myself to say it.
“No!”
I relax a little, happy that Toby isn’t that guy at all. I should’ve known better. “I’m sorry I ever thought—”
“Don’t be. But you’re right. She’s going to make the whole school think I pressured her into sex.”
I don’t know how to get him out of this. He could deny it, but Meredith is a girl. A girl who can turn on tears like a faucet. And now she’s back at the top of the popular scale. Toby doesn’t stand a chance.
Chapter 19
“I think our best bet is to stay away from each other and let Meredith handle this her own way,” Toby says.
“But she could spread this rumor throughout half the school by the end of the day.” He’s nowhere near as worried about this as he should be.
He takes my hands in his. “You don’t believe I did that, and that’s all that matters to me.”
“Toby, that’s sweet, but believe me, you’re going to care if the entire school looks at you like you’re a…” I shake my head.
“We’ll deal with that if and when it happens.”
I don’t want to let it go. This is too huge to just hope it blows over. I want to come up with a plan, but the bell rings and we have to get to class.
“Relax. We’ll figure something out.”
“Remember when our biggest problem was not letting Tori find out about us?”
He smiles. “We’ll deal with that too.” He kisses me and disappears through the curtains.
All day I wait for Meredith to drop the bomb. It’s torture. I’m more worried about Toby than anything else. He’s such a good guy. He made a mistake. One he regrets, and Meredith is going to make him pay for it, all so she can stay popular. It’s so wrong it makes me sick. Toby doesn’t deserve this, and I want to help him but I’m not sure how. No one is going to take my word over Meredith’s.
“Did you hear?” Amber Sherman says, leaning forward to whisper to the girl sitting next to me, Rachel Something-or-other.
“What?” Rachel asks.
“Meredith told me that Toby bought her that necklace to try to make up with her.”
“For what?”
My stomach clenches as I slouch down, trying to listen to every word they say, and hoping it has nothing to do with Meredith’s threat.
“She said he forgot to invite her to his birthday party. He said he assumed she’d go since she’s his girlfriend, but she reminded him that girls like to be invited places.”
“It’s like he doesn’t even know her,” Rachel says. “He’s lucky to have Mer
edith. She’s so supportive of his basketball.”
I roll my eyes. Meredith is a cheerleader. It’s her job to support the basketball team. Man, she has these girls buying every word she says. And that’s really bad news for Toby. Still, I’m relieved she hasn’t mentioned anything about sex. Yet.
“Great job on the quiz, Miss Daniels,” Mr. Rollar says, placing my paper on the desk. “Like I said, you and Mr. Michaels make quite the pair.”
Amber and Rachel lean toward me at the same time. “What was that about you and Toby?”
They look like they’re ready to claw my eyes out on Meredith’s behalf. “Um, he’s my tutor.”
Rachel smirks, and Amber sits back in her seat, stifling a laugh. “Poor Toby,” Rachel mumbles.
I really hate those girls.
After class I pack up my things and head to my locker, but I almost can’t get there thanks to the crowd in the hall. Oh God! This is it. Tori comes up behind me with Ryder in tow. “Hey. I heard Meredith was ripping my brother a new one.”
I can’t respond. I’m too busy trying to hear Meredith, which isn’t too hard, considering she’s practically yelling.
“You thought some stupid necklace could patch things up? Well, think again, Toby. We’re over. Finished. You’re not worth the ground I walk on. You take me for granted. You’d rather study trig with that geek, Becca Daniels, than party with your friends. And you’re lousy in bed.”
Ouch. Cackles and cheers ring through the hall as the crowd parts and lets Meredith through. She smiles triumphantly, and when she reaches me, she raises an eyebrow. As much as I hate her, I have an overwhelming urge to hug her. She didn’t accuse Toby of anything really bad. She kept the breakup to petty crap that didn’t really mean a thing. I’m grateful for that.
“Well, there goes Toby’s street cred.” Tori laughs.
“He’s your brother.” I open my locker and stuff my books inside. “You could be a little more sensitive.”
“What was that thing about Toby tutoring you anyway?” Ryder asks.
“I was sort of bombing trig, so Tori asked Toby to tutor me.”
“Oh.” He nods. “The way Meredith made it sound, I thought maybe you and Toby—”
“What? God no!” Tori shakes her head. “That’s just ridiculous.”
Great. One problem down and one to go. All around us, people are yelling things at Toby. Awful things. Somehow Meredith has become their queen, and they’re all taking her side. He walks over to us and sighs.
“Good job, bro.” Tori pats his shoulder. “You may be lame in the sack, but Meredith’s a bitch. You’re better off without her.”
“Thanks.” He rolls his eyes before meeting my gaze.
I give him a small smile. “So, I got an A on my last trig quiz, but this next unit is pretty tough. You think you have time to tutor me this week?”
“I think his schedule is pretty wide open now.” Ryder pats Toby on the back and laughs.
“Gee thanks, man. You’re a real friend.”
“Just busting on you. Don’t be so sensitive.” Ryder drapes his arm around Tori and they walk out. Toby and I fall in step behind them. His hand brushes mine, which is as close to holding hands as we can get right now. Even though Meredith didn’t attack Toby with the sex card, she still might if we go public before Saturday. Five days. Then Toby and I can be together. I just hope it doesn’t mean the end of my friendship with Tori.
***
“So, that wasn’t too bad,” I say, sitting down on Toby’s bed.
He locks the bedroom door behind him. “Oh no. I’m just lame in bed. Not bad at all.” He drops some crickets in Elvis’s cage.
“Okay, I know that’s so not cool, but it could’ve been a lot worse.”
His ego is majorly bruised, and unfortunately, I can’t help him with it because I’m in no position to dispute what Meredith said.
“What are you studying in trig?” He sits down next to me.
“Already got it. It’s totally easy.”
“Oh.” He perks up a little. “So, this study session is…”
“Strictly a make-out session. If that’s okay with you.” I smile.
“Oh, that’s more than okay with me.” He leans into me, cupping my face in his hand. “I do believe that’s the first time you’ve asked for my permission.”
“I think you’re right.” I tilt my head and kiss him. It feels amazing to know I’m the only girl pressing my lips to his. No more Meredith. Our path is clear. Of course it leads to Tori, but I’m choosing not to think about that until Saturday. I have five days to enjoy this. To bask in Toby’s lips.
He deepens the kiss and tips me back on the bed. He’s leaning over me, his weight pressing down on my body. His fingers tickle my stomach and I laugh.
“That wasn’t the reaction I was going for.”
“Sorry, but you tickled me. What did you expect?”
“To give you chills. To drive you crazy. Not for you to laugh.”
I pull his lips back to mine. His kiss is hungry and I can barely breathe. I turn my head, gasping for air. He buries his head in my neck. A moan escapes my lips, and he takes that as encouragement. I feel his fingers unbutton my jeans. This can’t happen yet. Not until everything is out in the open. I push my hands against his chest. “Toby.”
He lifts his head and looks at me. “What’s wrong?”
“I’m not ready. We just got back together, and we haven’t even told Tori yet.”
He sits up and runs his hands through his hair. Is he mad at me? He can’t be. No way could he expect me to jump into bed with him this soon.
“I’m sorry,” he finally says. “I didn’t mean to…I just got caught up in the moment.”
I sit up so we’re shoulder to shoulder. “It’s okay. I missed you too this past week, but you know I’ve never…” We talk in a lot of unfinished sentences these days.
“I know. And I’m more than willing to wait. It’s just been a crazy day. I wasn’t thinking.” The disappointment on his face isn’t lost on me.
“Do you want me to go?”
He turns his head toward me. “No. Not even a little bit.”
“Okay, good.”
He stands up and gets his guitar. I’m expecting him to get his iPod, but instead he just sits down and plays. It’s not a song I’ve heard before, but it’s beautiful. I close my eyes, listening to the melody. And then he starts singing. The words are beautiful too, especially in Toby’s deep voice. I’m swaying to the music until I hear my name. Oh my God. He wrote a song for me. My eyes open and I see him staring at me. He’s singing to me, pouring his heart out. I recognize the words because they describe me and my life. And that’s when I realize Toby’s crush on me might actually be bigger than my crush on him. He’s been watching me. He knows me. Really knows me. A tear trickles down my cheek as he plays the last chord.
“That was…I don’t even know what to say.”
“I was going to wait to play it for you, but now felt right.”
“I loved it.” What I want to say is “I love you,” but it’s still too soon. Isn’t it? Or does knowing each other for seventeen years actually make it perfectly normal to feel this way?
He puts the guitar down and walks over to me, pulling me to my feet. He reaches for my jeans again, but this time he buttons them. I’d forgotten about them. “Bec, I hope you know I never considered Meredith my girlfriend.”
I nod. “I know.”
“But I do consider you my girlfriend. I mean, if you’re willing to be.”
“Are you asking me to be your girlfriend?” My heart flutters. He’s willing to change the way he feels about relationships and titles for me.
“That’s sort of what the song was about.”
I replay the lyrics in my head. “Will you be my girl?”
He smiles. “Well, I can’t do the girl part, but change it to guy and my answer’s yes.”
I sigh, a content, couldn’t-be-happier sigh. “You’re incredible,
you know that?”
“I know you are.”
I cup his face and kiss him. “And my answer is yes too.”
He wraps his arms around me and lifts me up. “Would it be really cliché if I spin you around?”
“Yes, but do it anyway.”
He does, and we both laugh and topple onto the bed. He doesn’t push any boundaries. We just make-out for two hours. Two really amazing hours.
“Tori is going to come looking for me if I don’t get out of here.”
“Five more minutes?” He kisses my neck.
“No.” I gently push him away.
He holds up four fingers. “Four more?”
“No.”
He lowers one finger.
I kiss him again, quickly, and scoot off the bed before he can get his hands on me.
“No fair.”
“See you tomorrow.”
He lies back on his bed. “I’ll see you in about”—he looks at his watch—”thirty minutes or so when I fall asleep.”
“Careful there. You’re starting to sound like you’re—”
“Falling hard?”
My heart skips. I wasn’t expecting him to say that. He sits up, swinging his legs onto the floor. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”
“No. It’s okay. I’m just surprised. But not in a bad way. Not at all.”
“I’m going to say goodnight before I ruin the evening.”
“You didn’t ruin it.” He made it better. I don’t think either one of us is ready to say the L-word yet, though. “Sweet dreams.”
“That’s my line.” He smiles.
“Goodnight, Toby.”
“Night.”
I have to force myself to leave his room, and I don’t do it a minute too soon. Tori is right outside his door.
“I was just coming to see what was taking you guys so long.” She points to my hands. “No books?”
“Oh.” Damn it. “Toby found this great website with practice problems. We already did all the ones in this unit, and I needed some extra practice.”
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