Small Doses
Page 14
KEEP TIME, STAY SHARP
If you can’t make the juggle work, then you need to change how you’re juggling. Part of being a multihyphenate is finding the actualized way to implement all that you desire to do. Key parts of that are time management and discipline. Sure, you’re a free spirit and you move outside the confines of normalcy and blueprints. That’s all the more reason why you have to have some sort of method for managing what others consider to be your madness. When I was writing this book I had to literally add hours to my day by getting up at 5 every morning in order to make sure I would have time to write on top of continuing to juggle everything else poppin’ off in my multihyphenate universe. Make to-do lists. Keep your calendar up to speed. Assess and reassess your priorities as they come. Hold yourself accountable. All of these can be helpful tools. That said, it is not juggling if you’re always dropping the ball. Know your limits.
NO BLUEPRINT
I find the biggest frustration for most when it comes to being a multihyphenate is the fact that there is no blueprint. This is not only frustrating for the multihyphenate themself but for the folks who care about the multihyphenate. Even though there has been no shortage of folks who are multihyphenates, it hasn’t worked its way into the mainstream as a common career choice. So it is no wonder that it can feel like you’re that feather at the end of Forrest Gump while trying to nail down your path. Change your perspective and up your courage. The world was expanded (and, in many cases, destroyed) by folks who had the backing and the courage to venture out beyond what had already been charted. If you’re a multihyphenate you, too, gotta gain the gumption to chart your own course and know that there will be wrong turns along the way (and if that wrong turn lands you in someone else’s space don’t just claim it for yourself. Learn from them and then keep going). If you’re in the lane of the folks who care about the multihyphenate, support them. Sure, it may cause you worry. It may be unorthodox. You may be West Indian, or from the Continent and culturally it feels almost physically impossible to support someone in a career choice with no conclusive direction. However, do it. We must support those willing to explore new lanes of expression and establish new boundaries of human ability. Without them, we are stagnant.
WHAT IS PASSION?
Passion keeps you moving when you’re exhausted.
Passion knows no bounds and always pulls you further along your path.
Passion excites you.
Passion inspires you.
Passion makes you feel full when you take part in it.
Passion feels right even when you’re wrong.
Passion feels like winning even when you fail.
People spend their entire lives looking for their one passion. You may have more than one. Or your passion may be the work of doing multiple things. Whatever it is, it may take time, and it will definitely take self-exploration, but if you’re trying to discover your passion, ask yourself if what you think it is/they are line(s) up with most or hopefully all of the above.
“YOU HAVE TO PICK ONE.”
People will tell you this lie all day long. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO PICK ONE THING TO MASTER. It helps, however, to find one thing that allows you to do everything.
Phrases like the above are common comments when you’re a multihyphenate, and sometimes you find yourself stuck on how to reply. No worries, here’s some clap backs to give ’em back! You’re welcome!
• It’s like you do so much you do nothing.
That’s a common sentiment from those who find it unfathomable that one can be multitalented, because they are not.
• So what do you do?
I utilize my many gifts, to the best of my abilities, across a number of commercial fields.
• You have to choose one thing.
It would be irresponsible of me to limit my gifts to one box. Instead, I think outside of it, where there’s plenty of room for me to be all of me.
• How do you make money?
As long as I’m not asking you for any, it’s none of ya damn bidness!
GEM DROPPIN’
Multihyphenate vs. Dabbler
SOME MIGHT SAY WE LIVE IN AN ADD WORLD. So many things are constantly pulling at our attention. If I’m not on Instagram, I’m on Twitter. If I’m not on Twitter, I’m texting. If I’m not texting, I’m FaceTiming. If I’m not FaceTiming, I’m daydreaming about a boy I currently like and wondering if he’s daydreaming about me. If I’m not daydreaming, I’m bingeing a show. If I’m not bingeing a show, I’m shooting a show. It’s sensory overload! I believe this has been a gift and a curse for a lot of folks. It’s like having a lot of clothes. Super fun and makes you feel like Barbie, but also, a bit overwhelming when you’re hella tired and hella hungry and all these colors are coming at you and for some reason everything you put on either looks foolish or hoeish and you. Just. Need. To find. Something. ANYTHING. To wear. With the advancement of game changers like the interwebs, gender equality, and an increase in black college graduates, ceilings are being broken, doors kicked in, and thus there is more access than ever for individuals to explore various career interests. Fields like coding, finance, sports, etc. are no longer considered “just for men.” Areas like marine biology, psychology, and fashion are seeing a more diverse pool of interest in terms of culture/ethnicity. That said, with endless possibilities can come a lack of direction. We’ve all heard the adage, “Jack of all trades, master of none.” In determining your direction you must first determine whether you are a true multihyphenate or a dabbler.
A true multihyphenate is someone who has dedicated significant time to mastering a number of skills that work together synergistically. That’s not just to say you’re good at a number of things. It’s that you are professionally adept at a number of things. For instance, I am rather athletic and can knock down threes from the top of the key, have a mean backhand on the tennis court, and at the time of writing this, can still do a backflip. However, I would never claim to be a basketball player or a tennis player because I have never given dedicated focus to mastering either and consider them both hobbies. Gymnastics, on the other hand, was my life for five years, with daily practices and competitions, and had a lifelong effect on the person I would become. Therefore, when asked about my athletic interests I simply say, “I play tennis. I play basketball. But once a gymnast, always a gymnast!”
In order to become a multihyphenate, the first thing you must master is time management. The second is knowledge of self. These two things are integral because once they are synergized you must be able to effectively juggle the different strains of your trajectory or, just like a plant whose roots aren’t thoroughly watered, they will dry up. Knowledge of self comes into play because you need to be truly honest with yourself about the frame and inner workings of each of your hyphens to know how much and what type of attention needs to be paid to them respectively. For instance, working on the illustrations involved in this book has forced me to up my focus on my visual art. That’s a skill set that has been a tad neglected due to the time I’ve put into my writing and performing as of late. You must nurture each of your hyphens like they are your children. Though they are a part of a cohesive picture formed from you, they each have their own identities and uses and require unique attentiveness that you can only determine from being conscious of them. I will speak more to the concept of synergizing your hyphens in a bit, but for now, just know that as a multihyphenate, even though folks may not understand the multiple layers of your professional profile, the work is to refine your varied skill set into tributaries that all serve the mainstream of your cashflow.
A dabbler is not a bad thing, it’s just not a multihyphenate. A dabbler is someone who has a number of interests that exist as hobbies. They may be good at them. They may even be great at them, but they have never committed time and effort to any of their interests enough to have mastered them. When people pursue different avenues of interest but cannot claim them professionally or on a mastery level, they are a dabbler. They enjoy p
artaking in the practice of play versus profession and are driven more by the variety of things life has to offer, versus having a multitude of serious passions in various areas. Dabblers are often people who have dedicated a significant amount of their life to one specific thing and have hobbies that serve as a useful tool of balance. However, the hobbies that they have interest in, no matter how dedicated they may be to them, do not have a bearing on their professional trajectory. Again, to call someone “a dabbler” is not a diss, but it feels like a diss when it is mistakenly thrust at someone who truly finds life’s purpose in a myriad of things, versus just one. Furthermore, you may enjoy partaking in many types of art, but if you have never attempted to sell or display your art, be it as an actor, writer, director, painter, sculptor, graphic artist, poet, musician, DJ, songwriter, etc., I consider it a diss to those who have. Be thoughtful in claiming titles. For example, though by linguistic standards if you paint, you are a painter, by artistic standards there is far more nuance involved. It takes incredible nerve, courage, and discipline to lay before this unrelenting world a creation that has come from turning passion into purpose. Sure, dabblers can attempt to sell their work, but when you are coming from a place of simply using the craft as a tool to pass the time versus as a conduit of channeled focus, it is a pastime, not a priority. To dabble is to try, to be a multihyphenate is to commit.
As a multihyphenate myself, this topic is very near and dear to me. For so many years, I was told that my being able to do many things well was a detriment. I was told it was a sign of lack of focus. What I learned, however, was that it wasn’t that I lacked focus—in fact, it was that my blur of interests, passions, and endeavors made it difficult for the world to know how to focus on me. I’m speaking from the point of view of an entertainer, but this applies to any multihyphenate looking to make money. Unless you’re independently wealthy or Wakanda’s Prince T’Challa with vibranium on swole, you’re going to have to present yourself to outside parties to gain access to economic growth. In which case you have to look at yourself as a brand being sold to the marketplace. Basic marketing will tell you that if a product’s identity and purpose is not clear, consumers will not purchase it. Now, I know some of you are reading this and are talking to the page, saying, “But Amanda! I am not a product! I am not a brand! I am a person!” Sounds good, and yes, in real life that may be true. You, boo, are a whole human being with a life and a past and a present, but if you want a future—in ANY field—you have to understand that you are a part of a business model that looks at you not as a person, but as a resource. The question isn’t to be or not to be, it is what type of resource will you be? That is where your autonomy comes in. Though it can feel very sobering to know you’re not in control of said marketplace and its diminishing of individuals down to dollaz, what you are in control of is how you enter that marketplace and how you want to be defined versus sitting back and letting it define you. As a multihyphenate this can be the absolute most difficult, frustrating, overwhelming task. Yes, you are passionate and skilled in a number of areas, but what is your passion, what’s your “thing”!? People will ask you this all day because your passion is how they label you. No, most people don’t like to be labeled, but the world as we know it craves assigning labels to people. That’s why there is a genus species name created for every animal, insect, and plant. The human race likes to know how to identify things so that it knows what to do with them, how they work, and how they can be utilized. Unfortunately, plants and animals don’t have agency in deciding that, but you do. People will also tell you that you have to choose one thing. Oh, they say this shit all the time. “You have to focus on one thing. Put all your energy to that then let it open the doors to allow you to do other things.” There is a level of truth to that but not in the context they imply. They say that with an underlying notion that not only is it not a good idea to pursue varied interests but that it’s not truly possible. A lot of people are only good at one thing. Which is phenomenal, but it is limiting when they place their constraints upon you. My experience, in contrast, is that the “one thing” is not necessarily one skill or interest but one overarching concept that brings all that you do together in a cohesive fashion that clearly defines your brand and its purpose. I call it “The Skeleton Key” because it is able to unlock all the doors of your interests and let them thrive together under one roof. In order to find that key I suggest not looking at the breadth of your skills but instead considering the outcome you seek. Once you’ve identified that outcome, look for the different pathways that lead there, consider others who have successfully achieved the outcome that attracts you, and research the path they took to get there. What parts of their path align with yours? Where do they diverge? The answers to drawing up your own blueprint are there.
Being a multihyphenate can feel overwhelming and empty at the same damn time. On one hand, you have seemingly endless energy that you must channel through various means that can often feel like you’re being pulled in opposing directions. On the other hand, because of all these opposing directions, you can feel like you’re going in no direction at all and are simply turning in circles or building at an interminably slow pace. You’re not. Your process is just different. It requires hella patience, stamina, and discipline. It also requires freedom, flow, and fun. If this world were comprised more of people doing what they truly love than what they have to do, it would be a better place. Give yourself a shot at the former, by being real with yourself about what you really are. As for the dabblers, let your myriad of interests continue to color your life and punctuate your landscape with oases of fun and fascination that bring you joy.
Comedy Key
THAT ONE TIME
In October 2013 I got an email from a young woman asking if I’d like to be a part of the all-black women stand-up showcase she and a friend were putting together. It changed my life. Saturday Night Live was in search of a negress to add to their cast, as they’d been conspicuously lacking one for quite some time. One of their cast members even went so far as to say the reason for the lack of black women was because none had stepped up to the plate. Imma just leave that there, because it’s so preposterous a notion it is undeserving of rebuttal. Instead, the rebuttal was a slew of black women comedian showcases popping up all over town with lineups of funny sistas tryna get their shot. I had never done stand-up before but there I was, in my apartment looking down at my phone, wondering, “Do I do it?”
“What do you do?” had become a treacherous question that I dodged and ducked when hurled my way. It is seemingly innocuous but to a multihyphenate without a clear direction it was like a Hattori HanzM sword in my eye every time. The inquiry was an immediate reminder of what I deemed my own personal failure. Sure, I’d been an artist all my life and had committed hours upon hours to mastering the various skills in my tool belt. Yet I floated above the surface from one gig to the next, wearing more hats than you’d see at a Sunday Church service in Atlanta. I wanted to be grounded. I wanted to be able to clearly tell people what I do in a concise fashion. Even better, I wanted them to know what I am without some long, convoluted explanation that twisted and turned like a map of the Underground Railroad. But as of late that seemed like a notion out of reach. I mean, even I didn’t know how to describe myself in the creative space. I was LEGIT a DJ, a comedic actress, a host, a writer, a singer, a rapper, and a painter. I had more than dabbled in each and attained a level of professional prowess that, though impressive, made my business card look like I had multiple personalities. Speaking of personalities, the word personality, too vague and disconnected to encompass the true breadth of my depth, was the latest summation I had come up with for my branding after trying and discarding everything from “humorist” to “content creator” to “renaissance woman.”
I remember once going to a meeting at an agency that a friend had referred me to. (By the way, having someone who is already making them money let them know that you, too, could make them money is the best way to get o
n an agent’s radar.) I walked into their NYC offices, somewhere in the low twenties, off Broadway, and sat down with a large, white, red-faced man behind a cluttered desk who proceeded to tell me that if I only “had a twin sister and owned a cupcake shop,” he could do something with me. My head fell to the side, perplexed. He went on to say, “Looking at your resume and materials, you’re just a smart, funny, black girl who knows a lot about hip-hop and there’s nothing I can do with that.” I took it in. He was dead serious, and I couldn’t even counter. I rose, told him it was only 9:12 a.m., and therefore too early in the day to stomach that kind of rejection, thanked him for his time, and headed out. It was the latest frustration in a constant stream of “no”s, “not interested”s, and “We just don’t know what you do”s. I had spent my twenties diving head-first into a bevy of artistic realms that had given me a tool belt of skills that was matched by few, but also an overwhelming sense that I would never find my niche. That feeling of no direction is the number one nightmare of being a multihyphenate. All at once you feel full of promise, and yet devoid of purpose. You envy those who have a singular clear directive and wish that you too could have a bottom line to come back to. I was no different. My talents felt in the way.
I began to tackle the unsolved mystery from a more logical angle by looking over the landscape of my work for a through line that could help shape it. What I found was comedy. Regardless of the medium, I always sought to infuse humor into my work, and after a couple seasons of Best Week Ever, two YouTube series, and a humor-based show on AOL called The Spark, it had become clear that I was funny. Once I peeped this, I began to obsess over Carol Burnett. Her sketches and ability to be consistently funny across TV, stage, and movie screens was incredible to me. It was dope to see someone who was a true multihyphenate shine. Watching Carol drove me to look at other entertainers who had managed to do the same. Names like Wayne Brady, Chelsea Handler, Maya Rudolph, Ellen DeGeneres, Queen Latifah, and Chris Rock came to mind. They were all multihyphenates who had managed to successfully crossover into different lines of entertainment work. I pride myself on my logic and skills of deduction, and they came to use when I looked at the differences between these great talents. Side by side they all share similarities in their pursuits, but in fully dissecting their blueprints I figured out the main thing that some had and some didn’t: their own voice. Sure, Queen, Wayne, and Maya are super dope and woke and steeped in goodness, but their work was not rooted in their point of view in the same way Ellen’s, Chelsea’s, and Chris’s was. They all had their own points of view but unlike the former three, the latter had built their entire brands on not just their performance style in the comedy space but on their identities as comedic personalities. As outspoken as I was, this was a doozy of a realization. I was looking at three of the most poppington entertainers of our time and comparing their path to mine and realizing that just like them, I could host. I could write. I could act. I had a strong point of view. I had a big personality. As far as repertoire went there was only one thing they shared that was missing from mine: stand-up comedy.