Cruise Millions: A Humorous Cruise Ship Cozy Mystery (Cruise Ship Cozy Mysteries Book 6)

by A. R. Winters

  When I got back to my cabin, I paused outside the door. There was something on the floor.

  I remembered that I’d felt something brush against my leg as I’d rushed out the door to chase the fake housekeeper. He had left it there for me.

  I crouched down and picked it up. It was a laminated information card that explained the proper use of the ship’s lifeboats.

  At the top of the card, a few words were scrawled in Sharpie.

  Con Deck

  Boat 1A

  Whoever the mystery man was, he was trying to help.

  Or if not help, it suited his purposes to have Alejandro’s body found.

  Clutching the card to my chest, I entered my room. Sam had returned while I was out, and she was snoring away on her top bunk.

  I nearly woke her, but I was exhausted. All I wanted to do was crawl into bed and sleep. But I had to work on the report first.

  After putting my laptop on the desk, I sat down and pecked away at the keyboard, my head woozy with exhaustion and the aftereffects of the adrenaline. My legs and feet ached and I couldn’t help but think how I didn’t envy Ethan. He would be busy most of the night.

  After half an hour of typing, I couldn’t keep my eyes open anymore. Afraid of falling asleep with my head on the keyboard, I decided to call it a night.

  I set my phone’s alarm for six in the morning. I’d get up early and finish the report with plenty of time for Ethan to submit it to HQ when he informed them of another passenger’s murder.

  After pushing the lid of the computer closed, I crawled into bed, hoping tomorrow would be a better day.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  I finished typing up my report first thing the next morning, starting well before the sun had risen.

  Sam was still fast asleep in the bunk above mine while I tapped at the keyboard. I kept seeing Alejandro’s face in front of me, dimly lit by the yellow-green glow of the fluorescent stick.

  If Alejandro had killed Lesley, I now had to solve the mystery of who killed Alejandro. But it was unlikely there would be two killers aboard the ship. That meant that Lesley and Alejandro were probably killed by the same person. But who could it be?

  I had to figure out how the fake housekeeper fit into everything. He had deliberately left the lifeboat information card outside my room for me to find, and when I interrupted him, he led me right to the body.

  He clearly knew more than I did, but it didn’t seem likely that he was the killer. Not unless he was a dumb one. Since neither Ethan nor I had managed to catch the guy yet, I didn’t think he was all that careless. He couldn’t be.

  The mystery man seemed likely to be my best source of information, so it was a matter of flushing him out. But how to do that? I could only think of one way. I needed to get that ring, the one we believed he’d been searching for on a previous cruise.

  The only problem with that was that Ethan had forbidden me from wearing the ring as bait. But that was before we found Alejandro’s body. Before we knew there was more going on. There seemed to be more at stake now, and I figured it was worth taking the risk.

  And anyway, it wasn’t Ethan’s place to tell me not to take risks, was it? I was a grown woman, and if I wanted to take a chance to solve two murders and clear my friend’s name, then I was darn well going to.

  I just needed to get the ring.

  When I finished typing up my report, leaving out any of my opinions or ideas about who may have carried out Alejandro’s murder, I saved the file and sent it to print in the ship’s business center. Swan didn’t provide us with printers in our cabins. Not even social media managers. I guess I was supposed to be all digital anyway, not printing things out—apart from murder reports.

  It was still dark outside when I got to the business center. I used my staff ID card to let me into the room. The business center was available twenty-four hours for passengers who liked to bring their work with them on vacation, but I was the only person there so early in the day.

  I found my report in the output tray of one of the printers. It covered one whole page, and half of another. Considering how long it had taken me to type all that out, it didn’t look very impressive.

  I got to Ethan’s office at around nine o’clock. The orderly was outside as usual, but he frowned when he saw me.

  “You just missed him.”

  “Missed him?” I said.

  “Yeah. He was working all night. Something happened, and he’s been in there on the computer ‘til just now. I think he’s trying to get half an hour of sleep before his meetings begin at ten.”

  “Oh, I see. I’m just going to pop this on his desk.” I waved the paper at the orderly.

  I was careful not to ask for permission to enter the office.

  If I did that, he would no doubt question if I was actually allowed to go into the first officer’s private office when he wasn’t there. But by telling him what I was doing and acting as if I had all the authority in the world to do it, I didn’t give him time to think.

  “Yes, ma’am.” There was a brief pause, as if he was considering something. Then he spoke again. “Hey, could you do me a favor?”

  “What is it?” When he’d begun to speak again after the hesitation, I’d been worried that he was going to forbid me from entering or question me further. But that didn’t seem to be the case.

  “I’m out of coffee,” he said, holding up a mug.

  I stared at him. It was not my job to fetch coffee for junior security team members. No way, Jose. Just as I was about to tell him, he blushed as he realized the source of my confusion.

  “I mean, I’ll be back in a minute. I’m getting the coffee myself. Could you hold down the fort and not let anyone else in? Usually Ethan brings me a refill, but he’s not here.”

  My annoyance turned to amusement, and I laughed at him. “Sure thing. The ship runs on coffee, right?”

  “You know it. Thanks again.”

  While the orderly went to get his caffeine fix, I walked into Ethan’s office.

  The lights were off and the curtains were closed, so it was dark inside. I flicked the switch near the door, and the fluorescent lights came on. The office felt so empty without Ethan in it. I’d only ever been in here alone once before. That was when I’d first found the ring.

  I walked over to the large desk and then around it to the far side where Ethan’s chair was located. I sat down and put my report onto his desk.

  Now, on to the real business. Where was the ring?

  There were six drawers in the desk, three on the left, three on the right. On the left, in the first drawer, I found Swan logoed writing paper, and business cards. In the second drawer, I found a mess of stationery items: pens, pencils, rulers, erasers, paperclips, elastic bands, and goodness knows what else. The third drawer down, which was much larger, contained, to my great surprise, a large bottle of whiskey and a pair of rock glasses underneath.

  I didn’t think Ethan drank much. I poked at the bottle with my index finger. It was virtually full. I guess I was right; he didn’t drink much. After the few days we’d had, it would be half empty if he was a real drinker.

  Next, I checked the right-hand side of the desk.

  The first drawer contained a nice fountain pen and a letter opener, and the second drawer was loaded with bite-size food packages—bags of peanuts, protein bars, muesli bars, dried fruit, and even a couple of small bags of dark chocolate. I had found my favorite drawer at least.

  They say that you always find things in the last place you look. Well, it didn’t work for me, because the last place I looked was in the final drawer in the desk. And it was completely empty. Wherever the ring was, it didn’t look like I was going to find it.

  I sat back in the chair and realized that, actually, I was relieved.

  Even though it was an excellent plan if I do say so myself, it would have meant I was lying to Ethan. And I didn’t want to do that. I couldn’t.

  It was the kind of plan that I really needed Etha
n to be on board with.

  While I was thinking about it, there was a sharp rapping at the door.

  I felt my cheeks flushing. I shouldn’t have been sitting in the big first officer’s chair. At least I knew it wasn’t Ethan himself; he wouldn’t be knocking on his own office door. All I had to do was wait for them to go away.

  So, I waited.

  But the person at the door didn’t go away. Instead, they tried the door handle, and, finding it unlocked, pushed it down all the way and swung the door open.

  I stared, unable to move, as the intruder entered.

  At first, he didn’t see me, despite the fact that I was sitting right behind the desk. Sometimes, people are like that. They only see what they expect to see.

  “Hello!” I almost shouted to the man.

  He jumped back.

  It was the captain, and he was shocked to see me sitting behind the first officer’s desk. I was almost as shocked to find the captain letting himself into this private office when he knew Ethan wasn’t here.

  “What are you doing?” he asked me, glaring.

  “I had to drop off a report.” I picked up the two sheets of paper from the desk and waved them in the air. “What are you doing?”

  Usually, someone as low on the totem pole as me doesn’t go around questioning the captain of the ship. But it was a reflexive response. If he was there when he shouldn’t be, I wanted to know why, even if he was the captain. I think he was so surprised that he didn’t realize he was answering the question before it was too late.

  “I was just here to… drop something off.” The captain frowned, and realization came over him. He had no reason to explain himself to me. “You shouldn’t be in here!”

  “We’re dating.” It sounded pretty lame when I said it. Unfortunately, he seemed to think so too.

  “It doesn’t matter whether you’re dating or not. That doesn’t give you the authority to be in this office alone.”

  “Sorry,” I whispered.

  Before the captain could question me further, another visitor arrived. It seemed Ethan’s office was quite the hub today, even though he wasn’t in it.

  This time, the knock came almost simultaneously with the door being opened. The knocker wasn’t a patient person.

  I confirmed that when I saw who it was.

  “Cece?” I said, staring at her. “What are you doing here?”

  Her eyes flicked over to the captain and then to me, and she put her hands on her hips. “What are you doing? Did you get a promotion?”

  I covered my mouth so the captain wouldn’t see my smile, and I shook my head no. “What’s going on?”

  “I need to speak to Ethan. I need to tell him something.”

  The captain suddenly looked interested. “What do you need to tell him?”

  “Err… Umm…”

  Whatever it was, I’d prefer it if she told Ethan or me private—not the captain. But this was the captain’s ship, and he was determined to find out. “Tell me.”

  Cece swallowed. “It’s… one of the other passengers in our millionaire cruise. He said his Hawaiian shirt has gone missing. It’s a genuine one, an expensive one, and it had a lot of sentimental value.”

  I wanted to sigh in relief as I heard her answer. I was assuming it was something she just made up to distract the captain. In terms of a distraction, it certainly seemed to work.

  “Really? Where was it taken from? What does it look like?”

  I frowned. Something was up. Why was the captain so interested in a missing shirt?

  “The guy—Dan Diamond—he lost it at Hemingway’s. He took it off for a dip in the pool, and he left it on the back of the barstool. But when he came out of the water it was gone. It was a Hawaiian shirt, with large purple flowers on it on a white background.

  “Can our guests not leave their shirts alone for a moment?” The captain frowned as if in thought. “There should be security cameras around there, right?”

  I nodded at the captain.

  There were cameras pretty much everywhere in the public areas. What I couldn’t understand was why he was taking such an interest in a minor crime. It seemed below his station.

  “I’m going to see what I can find out.” He stood up, a serious look on his face.

  He hadn’t even been this interested in the murder. I stared after the captain as he hurried out the room. Something weird was happening.

  “I’ll come with you!” I called after the captain.

  I figured this may be the work of the fake housekeeper again. The first time I’d seen him, he was wearing a stolen housekeeper’s uniform, and another time he stole a tuxedo from a passenger. If anyone was stealing clothes on the ship, my money was on him.

  Cece shook her head at me with a wink. I stopped, letting the captain go ahead. He clearly didn’t want to wait for me anyway, as he neither slowed down nor acknowledged my words.

  “What is it?” I asked my friend once we were alone again.

  “The shirt isn’t important. I just needed to give the captain some reason for being here. Actually, I was hoping both you and Ethan would be here…”

  “So there’s no missing shirt?”

  “No, the shirt is missing. But I wasn’t rushing over to Ethan to tell him that.”

  “What is it? Have you found something useful?”

  Cece came over to the big desk, which I was still sitting behind, and hopped up onto it. She sat cross-legged on the desk’s surface, facing me.

  “You know I work in housekeeping?”

  “Yes, but you’re on vacation…”

  “That’s right. I am on vacation. But I still know a few people, right?” Cece nodded to herself, not waiting for my answer. “I told them to keep a lookout—just to see if there was anything interesting in any of the other contestants’ rooms after Lesley’s death.”

  That was a great idea. Why hadn’t I thought of it?

  “And?”

  “A bottle of champagne was found inside one of the contestants’ rooms. One of the bottles taken from the Claim Your Million event.”

  “Oh? Whose room?” As far as I knew, Cece didn’t know about the death of Alejandro yet, nor the fact that he had been hit over the head with a blunt instrument, which may well have been another champagne bottle. This news seemed almost too good to be true.

  “It was in that rich lady’s room. The awful one.”

  I was sure I already knew who she meant. “Rich lady?”

  Cece hopped off the end of the desk. “Helen Johannsen, wasn’t it?”

  That was interesting. Very interesting indeed.

  “Thanks, Cece. You’re a star.”

  “Ice cream?” she asked me with a grin.

  “I need to fill you in on what else has been going on first. Then you’ll understand why what you just told me is so important.”

  And so I told Cece about Alejandro.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Ethan needed to know this new information right away. I felt a little bad since he was trying to sleep, but as I now knew from what happened to Alejandro, time is really of the essence for some stuff.

  While Cece stayed sitting on the desk, I pulled out my phone and dialed Ethan.

  “Ethan?” I said as soon as he picked up the phone. “Are you sleeping?”

  “I’m not now. What’s up?” His voice was slightly raspy and heavy with fatigue, but he didn’t sound annoyed. Probably because it’s me calling, I thought.

  I explained that some of the missing champagne from the Claim Your Million event was in Helen Johannsen’s room and that someone from housekeeping had noticed it.

  “And how do you know that?” asked Ethan with surprise.

  My silence was all the answer he needed to figure it out.

  “Oh. Cece. Right?” He took my extended silence as a confirmation. I didn’t want to get my friend in even more trouble, but I couldn’t lie to Ethan either. “Meet me outside Helen’s room. But don’t knock on the door yet. I won’t be lon
g.”

  “Sure thing.” I hung up the phone and stood up from behind Ethan’s desk. I elbowed Cece and she swung her legs off the desk.

  “Come on. Let’s go to Helen’s cabin. Ethan’s going to meet us there.”

  “We’ll need his keycard if she’s not in there.” Cece sounded sad as she said it.

  She was obviously still disappointed that her own card had been taken away from her. I was glad I hadn’t told her the head office wanted her locked in the brig.

  I figured she had enough to worry about without adding that on top.

  When we arrived at Helen’s cabin, Ethan was already there, standing outside the room. He was dressed in his full uniform, though if I wasn’t mistaken it was the same one from yesterday. The shirt was wrinkled and showed vague signs of grime from more than twenty-four hours of constant work.

  “Thanks for letting me know about the champagne bottles,” Ethan said to Cece when we arrived. “Of course the housekeeping staff should have called me or my staff instead of you—but at least you did the right thing.”

  “You know me. I always do the right thing.”

  That got laughs out of both Ethan and me. While Cece did do her best to do the right thing, her way of looking at the world was different than most people’s, and what she thought was the right thing wasn’t necessarily what anyone else did.

  Cece and I watched while Ethan rang the doorbell a few times. Helen had a nice room, one of the balcony suites. Although they were lovely, they weren’t the best that Swan offered. Maybe she had thought getting one of the massive VIP suites would be a little too extravagant for her, since she was traveling alone.

  After two attempts and no answers, Ethan unlocked the door. As soon as the electronic lock went green, he opened the door and just as he had in Alejandro’s room, he called inside to see if there was any response.

  There was nothing. For a moment, I felt like we were going to find another body. I held my breath, listening intently and peering into the room for any sign of life.