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Later Poems Selected and New

Page 19

by Adrienne Rich


  explosive gifts into meadows of fog and crickets

  there is the cuckoo and the tiny snake

  there is the table set at every meal

  for freedom whose chair stays vacant

  the young men in their newfound passions

  (Love along with them the ones they love)

  Obscurity, code, the invisible existence

  of a thrush in the reeds, the poet watching

  as the blood washes off the revolver in the bucket

  Redbreast, your song shakes loose a ruin of memories

  A horrible day . . . Perhaps he knew, at that final instant?

  The village had to be spared at any price . . .

  How can you hear me? I speak from so far . . .

  The flowering broom hid us in a blazing yellow mist . . .

  2

  This war will prolong itself beyond any platonic armistice. The implanting of political concepts will go on amid upheavals and under cover of self-confident hypocrisy. Don’t smile. Thrust aside both skepticism and resignation and prepare your soul to face an intramural confrontation with demons as cold-blooded as microbes.

  The poet in wartime, the Surréalistes’ younger brother

  turned realist (the village had to be spared at any price)

  all eyes on him in the woods crammed with maquisards ex-

  pecting him to signal to fire and save their comrade

  shook his head and watched Bernard’s execution

  knowing that the random shooting of a revolver

  may be the simplest surreal act but never

  changes the balance of power and that real acts are not simple

  The poet, prone to exaggerate, thinks clearly under torture

  knowing the end of the war

  would mean no end to the microbes frozen in each soul

  the young freedom fighters

  in love with the Resistance

  fed by a thrill for violence

  familiar as his own jaw under the razor

  3

  Insoluble riverrain conscience echo of the future

  I keep vigil for you here by the reeds of Elkhorn Slough

  and the brown mouth of the Salinas River going green

  where the white egret fishes the fragile margins

  Hermetic guide in resistance I’ve found you and lost you

  several times in my life You were never just

  the poet appalled and transfixed by war you were the maker

  of terrible delicate decisions and that did not smudge

  your sense of limits You saw squirrels crashing

  from the tops of burning pines when the canister exploded

  and worse and worse and you were in charge of every risk

  the incendiary motives of others were in your charge

  and the need for a courage wrapped in absolute tact

  and you decided and lived like that and you

  held poetry at your lips a piece of wild thyme ripped

  from a burning meadow a mimosa twig

  from still unravaged country You kept your senses

  about you like that and like this I keep vigil for you.

  1996

  Modotti

  Your footprints of light on sensitive paper

  that typewriter you made famous

  my footsteps following you up stair-

  wells of scarred oak and shredded newsprint

  these windowpanes smeared with stifled breaths

  corridors of tile and jaundiced plaster

  if this is where I must look for you

  then this is where I’ll find you

  From a streetlamp’s wet lozenge bent

  on a curb plastered with newsprint

  the headlines aiming straight at your eyes

  to a room’s dark breath-smeared light

  these footsteps I’m following you with

  down tiles of a red corridor

  if this is a way to find you

  of course this is how I’ll find you

  Your negatives pegged to dry in a darkroom

  rigged up over a bathtub’s lozenge

  your footprints of light on sensitive paper

  stacked curling under blackened panes

  the always upstairs of your hideout

  the stern exposure of your brows

  —these footsteps I’m following you with

  aren’t to arrest you

  The bristling hairs of your eyeflash

  that typewriter you made famous

  your enormous will to arrest and frame

  what was, what is, still liquid, flowing

  your exposure of manifestos, your

  lightbulb in a scarred ceiling

  well if this is how I find you

  Modotti so I find you

  In the red wash of your darkroom

  from your neighborhood of volcanoes

  to the geranium nailed in a can

  on the wall of your upstairs hideout

  in the rush of breath a window

  of revolution allowed you

  on this jaundiced stair in this huge lashed eye

  these

  footsteps I’m following you with

  1996

  Shattered Head

  A life hauls itself uphill

  through hoar-mist steaming

  the sun’s tongue licking

  leaf upon leaf into stricken liquid

  When? When? cry the soothseekers

  but time is a bloodshot eye

  seeing its last of beauty its own

  foreclosure

  a bloodshot mind

  finding itself unspeakable

  What is the last thought?

  Now I will let you know?

  or, Now I know?

  (porridge of skull-splinters, brain tissue

  mouth and throat membrane, cranial fluid)

  Shattered head on the breast

  of a wooded hill

  laid down there endlessly so

  tendrils soaked into matted compost

  become a root

  torqued over the faint springhead

  groin whence illegible

  matter leaches: worm-borings, spurts of silt

  volumes of sporic changes

  hair long blown into far follicles

  blasted into a chosen place

  Revenge on the head (genitals, breast, untouched)

  revenge on the mouth

  packed with its inarticulate confessions

  revenge on the eyes

  green-gray and restless

  revenge on the big and searching lips

  the tender tongue

  revenge on the sensual, on the nose the

  carrier of history

  revenge on the life devoured

  in another incineration

  You can walk by such a place, the earth is made of them

  where the stretched tissue of a field or woods is humid

  with belovéd matter

  the soothseekers have withdrawn

  you feel no ghost, only a sporic chorus

  when that place utters its worn sigh

  let us have peace

  And the shattered head answers back

  I believed I was loved, I believed I loved,

  who did this to us?

  1996–1997

  Letters to a Young Poet

  1

  Your photograph won’t do you justice

  those wetted anthill mounds won’t let you focus

  that lens on the wetlands

  five swans chanting overhead

  distract your thirst for closure

  and quick escape

  2

  Let me turn you around in your frozen nightgown and say

  one word to you: Ineluctable

  —meaning, you won’t get quit

  of this: the worst of the new news

  history running back and forth

  panic in the labyrinth

  —I will not touc
h you further:

  your choice to freeze or not

  to say, you and I are caught in

  a laboratory without a science

  3

  Would it gladden you to think

  poetry could purely

  take its place beneath lightning sheets

  or fogdrip live its own life

  screamed at, howled down

  by a torn bowel of dripping names

  —composers visit Terezin, film-makers Sarajevo

  Cabrini-Green or Edenwald Houses

  ineluctable

  if a woman as vivid as any artist

  can fling any day herself from the 14th floor

  would it relieve you to decide Poetry

  doesn’t make this happen?

  4

  From the edges of your own distraction turn

  the cloth-weave up, its undersea-fold venous

  with sorrow’s wash and suck, pull and release,

  annihilating rush

  to and fro, fabric of caves, the onset of your fear

  kicking away their lush and slippery flora nurseried

  in liquid glass

  trying to stand fast in rootsuck, in distraction,

  trying to wade this

  undertow of utter repetition

  Look: with all my fear I’m here with you, trying what it

  means, to stand fast; what it means to move

  5

  Beneaped. Rowboat, pirogue, caught between the lowest

  and highest tides of spring. Beneaped. Befallen,

  becalmed, benighted, yes, begotten.

  —Be—infernal prefix of the actionless.

  —Be—as in Sit, Stand, Lie, Obey.

  The dog’s awful desire that takes his brain

  and lays it at the boot-heel.

  You can be like this forever—Be

  as without movement.

  6

  But this is how

  I come, anyway, pushing up from below

  my head wrapped in a chequered scarf a lanterned helmet on this

  head

  pushing up out of the ore

  this sheeted face this lanterned head facing the seep of death

  my lips having swum through silt

  clearly pronouncing

  Hello and farewell

  Who, anyway, wants to know

  this pale mouth, this stick

  of crimson lipsalve Who my

  dragqueen’s vocal chords my bitter beat

  my overshoulder backglance flung

  at the great strophes and antistrophes

  my chant my ululation my sacred parings

  nails, hair my dysentery my hilarious throat

  my penal colony’s birdstarved ledge my face downtown

  in films by Sappho and Artaud?

  Everyone. For a moment.

  7

  It’s not the déjà vu that kills

  it’s the foreseeing

  the head that speaks from the crater

  I wanted to go somewhere

  the brain had not yet gone

  I wanted not to be

  there so alone.

  1997

  Camino Real

  Hot stink of skunk

  crushed at the vineyards’ edge

  hawk-skied, carrion-clean

  clouds ranging themselves

  over enormous autumn

  that scribble edged and skunky

  as the great road winds on

  toward my son’s house seven hours south

  Walls of the underpass

  smudged and blistered eyes gazing from armpits

  THE WANTER WANTED ARMED IN LOVE AND

  DANGEROUS

  WANTED FOR WANTING

  To become the scholar of : :

  : : to list compare contrast events to footnote lesser evils

  calmly to note “bedsprings”

  describe how they were wired

  to which parts of the body

  to make clear-eyed assessments of the burnt-out eye: : investigate

  the mouth-bit and the mouth

  the half-swole slippery flesh the enforced throat

  the whip they played you with the backroad games the beatings by

  the river

  O to list collate commensurate to quantify:

  I was the one, I suffered, I was there

  never

  to trust to memory only

  to go back notebook in hand

  dressed as no one there was dressed

  over and over to quantify

  on a gridded notebook page

  The difficulty of proving

  such things were done for no reason

  that every night

  “in those years”

  people invented reasons for torture

  Asleep now, head in hands

  hands over ears O you

  Who do this work

  every one of you

  every night

  Driving south: santabarbara’s barbarous

  landscaped mind: lest it be forgotten

  in the long sweep downcoast

  let it not be exonerated

  but O the light

  on the raw Pacific silks

  Charles Olson: “Can you afford not to make

  the magical study

  which happiness is?”

  I take him to mean

  that happiness is in itself a magical study

  a glimpse of the unhandicapped life

  as it might be for anyone, somewhere

  a kind of alchemy, a study of transformation

  else it withers, wilts

  —that happiness is not to be

  mistrusted or wasted

  though it ferment in grief

  George Oppen to June Degnan: “I don’t know how

  to measure happiness”

  —Why measure? in itself it’s the measure—

  at the end of a day

  of great happiness if there be such a day

  drawn by love’s unprovable pull

  I write this, sign it

  Adrienne

  1997

  Seven Skins

  1

  Walk along back of the library

  in 1952

  someone’s there to catch your eye

  Vic Greenberg in his wheelchair

  paraplegic GI—

  Bill of Rights Jew

  graduate student going in

  by the only elevator route

  up into the great stacks where

  all knowledge should and is

  and shall be stored like sacred grain

  while the loneliest of lonely

  American decades goes aground

  on the postwar rock

  and some unlikely

  shipmates found ourselves

  stuck amid so many smiles

  Dating Vic Greenberg you date

  crutches and a chair

  a cool wit an outrageous form:

  “—just back from a paraplegics’ conference,

  guess what the biggest meeting was about—

  Sex with a Paraplegic!—for the wives—”

  In and out of cabs his chair

  opening and closing round his

  electrical monologue the air

  furiously calm around him

  as he transfers to the crutches

  But first you go for cocktails

  in his room at Harvard

  he mixes the usual martinis, plays Billie Holiday

  talks about Melville’s vision of evil

  and the question of the postwar moment:

  Is there an American civilization?

  In the bathroom huge

  grips and suction-cupped

  rubber mats long-handled sponges

  the reaching tools a veteran’s benefits

  in plainest sight

  And this is only memory, no more

  so this is how you remember

  Vic Greenberg takes you to
the best restaurant

  which happens to have no stairs

  for talk about movies, professors, food

  Vic orders wine and tastes it

  you have lobster, he Beef Wellington

  the famous dessert is baked alaska

  ice cream singed in a flowerpot

  from the oven, a live tulip inserted there

  Chair to crutches, crutches to cab

  chair in the cab and back to Cambridge

  memory shooting its handheld frames

  Shall I drop you, he says, or shall

  we go back to the room for a drink?

  It’s the usual question

  a man has to ask it

  a woman has to answer

  you don’t even think

  2

  What a girl I was then what a body

  ready for breaking open like a lobster

  what a little provincial village

  what a hermit crab seeking nobler shells

  what a beach of rattling stones what an offshore raincloud

  what a gone-and-come tidepool

  what a look into eternity I took and did not return it

  what a book I made myself

  what a quicksilver study

  bright little bloodstain

  liquid pouches escaping

  What a girl pelican-skimming over fear what a mica lump

  splitting

  into tiny sharp-edged mirrors through which

  the sun’s eclipse could seem normal

  what a sac of eggs what a drifting flask

  eager to sink to be found

  to disembody what a mass of swimmy legs

  3

  Vic into what shoulder could I have pushed your face

  laying hands first on your head

  onto whose thighs pulled down your head

  which fear of mine would have wound itself

  around which of yours could we have taken it nakedness

  without sperm in what insurrectionary

  convulsion would we have done it mouth to mouth

  mouth-tongue to vulva-tongue to anus earlobe to nipple

  what seven skins each have to molt what seven shifts

  what tears boil up through sweat to bathe

  what humiliatoriums what layers of imposture

  What heroic tremor

  released into pure moisture

  might have soaked our shape two-headed avid

  into your heretic

  linen-service

  sheets?

  1997

  Rusted Legacy

  Imagine a city where nothing’s

  forgiven your deed adheres

  to you like a scar, a tattoo but almost everything’s

  forgotten deer flattened leaping a highway for food

  the precise reason for the shaving of the confused girl’s head

 

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