by Amy Clipston
He stared at her as his father’s words echoed in his mind. Was she right? Did he have to bend to her for their relationship to work?
But Ephraim was a farmer. He came from a line of farmers. How could he abandon his heritage for her? And he still thought delaying the wedding was her way of letting him know she wasn’t sure they were right for each other, even if she didn’t realize it. Even if she said she loved him.
“Forget it.” He waved her off and marched out the front door, the muscles in his back aching with growing frustration, his heart breaking again.
Mandy wilted as Ephraim stalked out of the house.
Meow?
Hank stood on his back legs and rested his front paws on her thigh. She wiped away her tears. “He’s incorrigible, Hank. I have to face the fact that it’s over.” She rubbed the cat’s chin, and he responded with a purr.
But was it truly all Ephraim’s fault? She’d been so incensed when he asked her to stick with the original plan that she hadn’t even asked him why he’d been so upset. She hadn’t followed Emma’s or her parents’ suggestions of listening to him and then respecting his opinion. Maybe he wasn’t the only one to blame for their problems.
“Don’t say it’s over.” Katie Ann’s expression was fierce as she stood in the doorway to the kitchen. “I’ll talk to him tonight. I’ll tell him he needs to give your relationship another chance.”
Mandy nodded, but in her heart, she was certain Katie Ann’s efforts would be wasted.
Ephraim walked up his family’s back-porch steps later and saw Katie Ann sitting on the glider. He set his lantern on the railing and then leaned against it. “Isn’t it late for you to be outside in the cold?”
“I’ve been waiting for you ever since Chris brought me home.” She pushed the glider into motion as she looked up at him. “Where have you been?”
“I took a drive. Why?”
“We need to talk.” She pointed at him. “Why are you being such an imbecile?”
“Excuse me?” Irritation colored his words.
“If you keep pushing Mandy away, you’ll eventually lose her forever.” Katie Ann stood and wagged a finger at him. “You’re going to regret it when you realize how stupid you’ve been.”
“I think you need to mind your own business.” He picked up the lantern and moved toward the back door.
“It’s kind of hard to mind my own business when I care about both of you and want you both to be froh. Everyone can see how much you love each other. Why can’t you take a step back and listen to what Mandy has to say?”
He spun to face her. “I have listened, and we want different things. That’s why it can’t work between us.”
Katie Ann threw up her hands. “Why does it matter so much where you live or where you work?”
“Because I’m a Blank!” He pointed to the ground. “I belong here. And mei future kinner belong here. I don’t want to live with Mandy’s parents or become a brickmason.”
“Do you think Uria wanted to give up working construction to become a dairy farmer?” Katie Ann crossed the porch and stood in front of him. “Darlene and Uria are making the best of a tough situation. Why can’t you and Mandy do the same for the sake of your love for each other?”
Ephraim stilled as Katie Ann’s words rolled over him, but he didn’t want to talk anymore. “Gut nacht.”
Yet as he climbed the stairs, he wondered if his sister could be right. Mamm said she and Dat would support whatever he decided. But would he dishonor his grandfather if he abandoned the farm that had sustained and defined his family for generations? He had to think about that too.
CHAPTER 7
Have you talked to Ephraim?” Tena asked as Mandy entered Emma’s kitchen Monday afternoon.
“No. He wouldn’t even look at me at church yesterday, and you know he didn’t come to our garden meeting.” Mandy sat down at the table across from Tena and Emma and set a container in the center. “I can’t believe we’ve been apart for more than a week now. It feels like an eternity.” She sighed. “I came so you could try my cheesecake. I baked all morning, and even Rhoda and Dat are saying they can’t eat it all.”
“Ach, mei liewe.” Emma shook her head. “It’s only been eight days. Don’t give up yet.”
“It’s difficult not to. After our argument on Saturday, I’ve kind of lost hope.” Mandy removed the lid from the cake saver, and the sweet smell of the cake filled the kitchen.
“All the guys are trying to make him realize he’s made a huge mistake by being so prideful.” Tena stood and crossed to the counter, where she took plates from a cabinet and forks from a drawer.
“They’re still trying to get through to him?” Mandy heard the thread of hope in her voice.
“Oh ya.” Tena brought the plates and forks to the table and then returned to the counter. “Even Katie Ann said she’s working on him.”
“I know.” Mandy frowned as her hope deflated like a balloon. “She told me Saturday she was going to talk to him. I was hoping he’d show up at mei haus and ask to talk to me last night. I was imagining us sitting on the back-porch glider despite the cold, working out all our issues. Then he’d propose to me again. But he didn’t come. It’s just a gegisch dream.”
“Don’t give up on that dream.” Tena brought a knife and cake server to the table. “Someone will get through his stubborn head.”
“I hope so.” Mandy stared at the cake. “I’ll run out of baking supplies.”
Emma and Tena laughed, and Mandy felt the corner of her lips turn up into a smile.
“I think that cake is too schee to eat,” Emma said.
“No.” Tena shook her head. “It’s too schee to waste.”
As Tena cut into the cake, Mandy smiled. Despite her overwhelming sadness over losing Ephraim, she was so grateful for her wonderful friends.
Ephraim shivered as he walked out to the pasture fence. His father stood looking up as the sunset soaked the sky with shades of orange and yellow. The horizon was like a brilliant watercolor painting.
“Mamm was looking for you.” Ephraim stood beside him and leaned on the fence. “What are you doing?”
“Enjoying the sunset.” Dat gave him a sideways glance. “Sometimes you have to stop and enjoy the beauty of God’s creation.”
Ephraim set his foot on the bottom rung of the split-rail fence. Then he rested his chin on his palm and his thoughts turned to Mandy for the hundredth time today. Was she watching the sunset too? He slammed his eyes shut. Why did she invade all his thoughts?
“When your mamm and I first married, we argued nearly all the time.”
Ephraim turned toward his father, curious. “Why?”
Dat shrugged. “I think most newlyweds go through a similar phase. You’re trying to get used to living together, and you’re adjusting to each other’s moods. Mei dat used to say love is blind and marriage is the eye-opener.” His loud belly laugh echoed throughout the pasture, and Ephraim couldn’t stop a smile.
“Daadi really said that?”
“All the time.” Dat wiped at his eyes. “Your mamm and I were young, and we had a lot of growing up to do. We didn’t have a haus, and we didn’t have any money. Your bedroom was our bedroom until your mammi and daadi retired and moved into the daadihaus on mei bruder’s land.” He pointed across the pasture toward his younger brother’s farm, nearly twenty acres away from them.
“I didn’t know that.” Ephraim studied his father. “I thought you and mamm moved into this haus after my grandparents retired.”
“Sometimes your plans aren’t what you expect, but love and faith will get you through.” Dat patted Ephraim’s shoulder. “Like your mamm told you last week, it’s okay if you decide to move off this land. You can decide to learn a new kind of work. Your mamm and I will support you no matter what you decide to do, and I know your daadi would have too. He always cared more about family than he cared about this land. Just don’t let your stubborn pride stand in the way of your future with Mandy.
”
Ephraim stilled as his father’s words washed over him. Despite their wisdom, he still had no idea what path he should choose.
He suddenly felt an overwhelming need for God’s love and support through all his crushing confusion. Why hadn’t he sought that more? As he looked toward the sunset, he opened his heart and silently began to pray.
God, please lead me on the path you’ve chosen for me. I love Mandy with all my heart, but I’m confused. Am I supposed to be with her? If so, am I supposed to abandon my dream of running mei dat’s farm and become a brickmason? Please send me a sign.
Mandy leaned her head against the doorframe as the sewing machine hummed while her sister worked. Her eyes moved to the unfinished wedding dress on the table, and renewed regret surged through her.
Rhoda stopped and looked up at her. “How long have you been staring at me?”
“Just a few minutes.” Mandy stepped into the room and sat down on a chair next to her. “What are you making?”
“Just a dress.” Rhoda held up the light-blue frock. “I thought it would be schee for church.”
“It’s lovely.” Mandy touched the material and then looked again at her unfinished wedding dress. “You should make something out of that. I’ll never wear it.”
“Stop.” Rhoda frowned. “You’re giving up too easily.”
Mandy tilted her head as she crossed one leg over the other. Maybe she had given up too easily. Maybe she’d been too prideful.
“I think you’re right,” Mandy whispered.
“Give Ephraim another chance.” Rhoda touched Mandy’s arm. “And always have faith.”
Mandy touched the unfinished dress. Would she ever wear it? Or would it just remain half sewn, sitting patiently on the table, collecting dust? If her sister was right, there was still a chance she and Ephraim could work things out. A tiny seed of hope took root in her chest, but she didn’t know where to begin when Ephraim was so angry with her.
Mandy folded her hands as she sat between Katie Ann and Rhoda at church the following Sunday. She stared down at the lap of her pink dress while the bishop preached from the book of John.
She glanced to the far side of the barn where Ephraim sat between Wayne and Jerry. She took in his handsome face with its strong chiseled jaw and his long, thin nose. He was the most handsome man she knew.
When the bishop announced it was time for the fifteen-minute kneeling prayer, she knelt facing the bench and leaned forward on it. Then she opened her heart.
God, I was blessed when Ephraim asked me to be his girlfriend almost a year ago. I had never been so froh in my life. When he proposed, I felt blessed beyond measure. Please help Ephraim and me find our relationship again. I believe he still loves me, and I know to the depth of my soul that I still love him. Help us find a compromise for our future. Please lead him back to me. Only you can help us mend our broken relationship.
Mandy opened her eyes and felt warmth encircle her like a loving hug. It was as if God were comforting her. She knew then that, somehow, everything was going to be okay. Maybe she could find a way to let Ephraim know she still cared.
“Have you talked to Mandy?” Jerry asked Ephraim as he sat across from him during lunch.
“No.” Ephraim stared at the lunch meat and bread on his plate. Mandy looked beautiful today. He’d tried to keep from staring at her across the barn during the service, but his eyes betrayed him. At one point, their gazes collided, and heat crawled up his neck to his cheeks. Had she felt the same heat when she looked at him?
“Why are you avoiding her?” Wayne asked. “Why are you letting her slip through your fingers?”
“Don’t you want to work it out?” Jerry added.
“Quit ganging up on me. It’s my business.” Ephraim looked up as Mandy approached with a carafe.
He swallowed as that familiar heat began traveling up his neck. She was the most beautiful woman in their district, if not the entire state of Pennsylvania. Her pink dress complemented her rosy complexion, and her gorgeous blue eyes sparkled as she filled a man’s cup and smiled. How he longed to touch her face and tell her how much she meant to him. He still loved her. He was certain of that.
His father’s advice tumbled through his mind. But how could they work out their problems if they didn’t agree on their future together?
Mandy filled his friends’ cups and then turned to him.
“Kaffi?” Her gaze met his as she held up the carafe.
“Ya. Please.” He lifted his cup and she filled it. “Danki.”
“Gern gschehne.” She lingered for a moment, and he was certain the world had stopped turning just for them.
I love you, Mandy.
If only he could say the words aloud. Would she say them back to him?
“Could I have some kaffi?” A man called from nearby, breaking through their trance.
“Excuse me.” Mandy cleared her throat and moved on to the neighboring table.
“You need to talk to her.” Jerry’s voice was close to Ephraim’s ear. “How would you feel if she fell in love with someone else while you were still stuck obsessing about where you want to live? Don’t you think you’d feel like a moron for not seeing where God was trying to lead you?”
“It’s too late now.” Ephraim shook his head. “I think I’ve missed my chance with her. We’ve said some horrible things to each other.”
“You know that’s not true. I saw the way she just looked at you.” Wayne’s expression was serious. “Listen, I said terrible things to Tena when we argued, and she still forgave me. We all say terrible things out of anger. That’s part of being human. We’re all taught to forgive, and Mandy will forgive you if you ask her to.”
Ephraim picked up his cup, wondering if Wayne could be right, wondering if everyone had been right. Wondering if God would send him that sign. Until he had one, he didn’t know what to do.
CHAPTER 8
I can’t believe Thanksgiving is this Thursday,” Clara said as she sat next to Mandy at Emma’s table the following Sunday afternoon. “November has flown by.”
Mandy glanced across the table at Ephraim as he sat slumped in his chair between Katie Ann and Wayne. She felt awkward and uncomfortable not sitting beside him. He seemed to feel uncomfortable just being in her presence.
After the intense stare they’d shared after the church service last week, she’d convinced herself he’d appear on her porch one night and beg her to work out their differences. But another week had gone by, and he’d given her only halfhearted hellos and good-byes when they passed each other at Emma’s house. All her hopes for their future had evaporated. It was officially over between them. Too many obstacles stood in their way.
“It has flown by,” Jerry said. “We took down the roadside stand this morning, and it’s stowed in Emma’s barn. The garden is closed for the season.”
“It’s been a great season,” Katie Ann chimed in. “We’ve raised quite a bit of money for the Bird-in-Hand Shelter in memory of Henry.” She looked at Emma. “We’re so grateful you allowed us to do this.”
“No, thank you all. I’m so honored that you want to keep Henry’s memory alive in such a wunderbaar way that helps our community.” Emma began to clap, and everyone joined in.
Mandy looked over at Ephraim, and he met her gaze. She sucked in a breath as he nodded at her. She returned the nod and then looked down at the table. Would looking into his eyes be painful for the rest of her life? She dreaded the possibility as her chest tightened with grief.
“Should we talk about what we want to plant next year?” Clara asked. “I can get the seeds from mei onkel again.”
“That’s a gut idea.” Katie Ann turned to a fresh page in her notebook. “Let’s talk about lessons learned. What worked and didn’t work this year?”
For the next hour, Mandy tried to focus on her friends’ discussion about the garden’s future, but she kept losing herself in thoughts of Ephraim. She breathed a sigh of relief when Tena declared the meet
ing over and then brought out turkey tetrazzini casserole for supper.
Mandy picked at her food and kept her focus on her plate as everyone ate. The conversations swirled around her, but she responded only when someone said her name. After they had brownies for dessert, she helped the other women clean the kitchen while the men talked in the family room.
“Are you ready to go?” Katie Ann asked Mandy when they were done.
Mandy nodded. “Ya.”
“Was iss letz?” Emma asked as she joined them.
Mandy looked past Katie Ann to where Ephraim now stood in the kitchen, talking to Wayne. When he turned toward her, she looked away. “I’m just tired.”
“I have something for you.” Emma pulled a piece of paper out of her apron pocket and slipped it into Mandy’s hand. “I found it when I was going through mei mamm’s favorite cookbook. I think it might help you.”
“What is it?” Mandy opened the paper and found a recipe for peanut butter pie. She looked up at Emma. “I don’t understand.”
Emma smiled. “The way to a man’s heart—”
“Is through his stomach.” Katie Ann finished the statement with a grin.
“Did you two work up this plan together?” Mandy pointed at each of them, and they nodded.
“It was my idea to find a recipe Ephraim might like.” Katie Ann pointed to the paper. “If you’re not ready to give up, then here’s an idea for a conversation opener. He’s crazy about peanut butter, so I’m sure he’ll love this.”
Mandy glanced over at Ephraim, and she felt new hope sprouting like a cornstalk. Maybe this was just what she needed to loosen the tension between them!
Wrapped in his warmest jacket, Ephraim sat on his parents’ glider and stared out toward the pasture. He shivered as he pushed it back and forth and watched his father’s cows lounge in the pasture.
The back door opened and then clicked closed.