Happier Without You

by Nicole Thorn

  The man looked displeased. “Unfortunately, it makes my job a little harder. All I have is what the three of you said to me.”

  “And that’s not enough?” I asked. “Because that sounds like bullshit to me.”

  He held his hands up, stopping me. “I’m going to try and do everything I can here, but I don’t want you to get your hopes up. You can file harassment charges if you want to.”

  “What will that do?”

  Cathy cut in, leaning toward the officer. “She goes to school with us. That won’t do anything helpful. It’ll piss her off more. Clover’s been ignoring her since she made the first threat, and look what happened.”

  “You assume it’s this girl, but it could be any number of people. It’s my job to find out who that is, and take care of it. So if you don’t mind, I would like to try and do my job.”

  I knew then, sitting there and staring at the tired looking man. Nothing would come of this meeting. The only one harmed here was that rabbit, so why would the man have thought this urgent? A few scared kids did not an emergency make, and an almost broken nose didn’t seem to matter either. We were on our own. Three against one. I should have felt better about the odds.

  “I want to hold my dog,” Cathy grumbled. “We’re wasting our time here. Thank you so much, officer, for showing that you care. When a dead person pops up out of nowhere, I hope you don’t feel guilty. We won’t, since we’ll probably be the ones dead.”

  It shouldn’t have shocked me that we weren’t getting help. We didn’t have any solid proof, and everyone liked to remind us of that. Why wasn’t anyone willing to believe us? Even my parents, but I guess they knew better. I’d been unstable, and they would have thought everything out of my mouth had to be taken with a grain of salt. They didn’t want to help me, and that hurt, despite their reasons. What was I supposed to think of myself, that my own parents didn’t care enough about me to even make a call to the school? They knew someone hurt me, and they did nothing. Nothing at all. They didn’t even follow me to my room when I stormed off.

  The three of us stood up, and the cop remained in his seat. “I’m going to look into this,” he promised. “But I think you all need to calm down, and take a little breather. You got spooked, and these are some pretty harsh charges you have for a girl who might not even have done anything.”

  Ugh, I wanted to get far away from there. I tugged my friends along, only nodding at the officer. We didn’t even sign anything, because it felt like an utter waste. They had dead people to give justice to, and criminals to find. What did a crazy teenager matter?

  “I need to go get Cujo. I don’t trust my house, or Tammy not to break her crazy ass in and make trouble. Can we still have our sleepover?” Cathy asked, frowning as we walked to the car.

  “Of course,” Poe responded. “I wouldn’t miss out on my chance to get cuddled by two people.”

  “What makes you think I cuddle?”

  “Doesn’t matter. Clover does.”

  Cathy smirked at me. “Oh, I see. You got him hooked with all your weird friend naps. Alas, I knew this was how it would end.”

  I felt only marginally better as we got back in the car and headed off to go fetch a dog. We pretended that we didn’t have a storm coming, or plans to make that would keep us protected. It felt like there wasn’t anything to be done, so we let ourselves have a mental break. God knew I needed it. There wasn’t much of my mind left.

  Chapter Twenty-Three: Bitches, Am I Right?

  Cathy seethed, and it hadn’t dimmed over the weekend. I didn’t expect it to, but it had started making Cujo tense. The little dog had sat on her lap, staring at her mama like she wanted it all to stop. Cathy did not stop, and I doubted she planned to. She paced in the parking lot after school, while Poe and I watched her. He had my hand, and a look of concern on his face.

  “We should do something,” he said.

  “Like?”

  Cathy stopped, and her hands balled into fists. “Acting like nothing is wrong. That little bitch. Did you see her smirk at us in gym?”

  I nodded slowly. “I did.”

  “We should break her face. It’s only fair.”

  “I agree,” Poe said. “While it gives me the jollies that the guy that hit you has to sit out of the remainder of the season, I want more punishment.”

  I found it a little fucked up that I thought it was hot, that look of fury on his face. He got all protective over me, and it made my skin tingle happily. The guilt came along with it, reminding me that things like hand holding could have come across as teasing. It was selfish of me, yes, but I didn’t know if I could have functioned without the contact. I hadn’t been aware before, but I needed the affection. I didn’t get it anywhere else, and my world got quiet when Poe had my hand.

  “My face doesn’t even hurt anymore,” I said, trying to comfort him.

  “Good. But I want another pound of flesh, if you wouldn’t mind.”

  Okay, that smirk he had on his face was made to kill. I didn’t want to hold out anymore, and I didn’t want this self-imposed protection. But the problem remained, I wasn’t the only one who needed protection. Poe thought he wouldn’t get bored of me, or tired. Maybe he wouldn’t have left me if that happened, but that only meant he’d stay out of guilt. Not wanting to break me again. He needed better.

  “This will not stand,” Cathy declared. “That bitch can’t think she can go around, making it look like puppies are dead. I have to thrash her, and I’m gonna do it right now. Are you with me?”

  I exchanged a look with Poe, waiting for him to answer. He had his head screwed on tighter than me anyway, and his opinion would have been sounder.

  “What do you have in mind?” Poe asked. “Like, are you going to kill her in front of witnesses?

  “I would never do that. But I would call her out. Stay or don’t!” Cathy called, and then turned, and started heading for the hill.

  I sighed, and rubbed my face, using my hand and the one of Poe’s I held. He laughed at me, that bastard. “We probably have to go keep an eye on that.”

  “You’re right. I would rather not have to bury a human body.”

  Poe decided to pick me up, and cradle me as we went after our friend. Below the hill, the team practiced a half assed game, and the cheerleaders…well, cheered them on. Cathy didn’t get too much farther ahead, and she slowed when she saw us coming. I guess this was supposed to be a team thing.

  The cheerleaders had broken into little groups, some of them stretching, while others sat and talked. Tammy walked to the edge of the bleachers, and searched her backpack for something. She pulled out a water bottle, and then smiled when she saw us.

  “Hey,” Cathy said, matching her smile. “How was your weekend?”

  “Great. Yours?”

  “Terrible. This insane girl came by my friend’s house, and shoved a murdered bunny into my car, hanging it up like fuzzy dice.”

  Tammy gasped, and put her hand over her heart. “Oh my god, that sounds awful. What did you do with the bunny?”

  Cathy’s glare sent shivers down my spine. “Cut the shit. We all saw you there, and we know you did it. So how about you promise to keep all your crazy to yourself, so I don’t have to bash your skull in.”

  The smile on Tammy never faded, and I found that chilling. Worse when she tilted her head at Cathy. “From where I stand, you seem to be the crazy one. I’m not screaming at a stranger. Maybe you should see a professional about that. Talk out some of your anger and paranoia.”

  Cathy stepped to her, and I pulled her back by the arm. “Don’t,” I said. “You hurt her, and there are dozens of witnesses.”

  “Like there was for you?” Cathy asked. “Three hundred people in that room, and none of them saw the one who hit you. That could happen again here.”

  I didn’t let go of her. “No, we’re not risking it.”

  “You should listen to your friend,” Tammy said flatly. “Wouldn’t want you to get in trouble.”

&nbs
p; “I don’t care if I get in trouble,” Cathy hissed. “We. Saw. You. You were watching us outside of the house. Do you follow us a lot? Is that part of it for you?”

  Tammy answered with perfect calm. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I wasn’t at your friend’s house. I don’t even know where either of them live.”

  Really? She wanted to pull that card? She had three witnesses to her being there, and she’d threatened me to my face. A little late for trying to seem innocent.

  “We know it was you,” I said. “Like how you sent someone to hit me.”

  Tammy smirked, and set her water bottle down. “I did no such thing, and I’m annoyed that you would accuse me of doing so. Are you that bored and pathetic that you have to think I’m obsessed with you?” She paused, and then tapped on her chin. “Actually, to me, this seems like you lot are obsessed with me. You fucked up my car, then followed me around a party. Maybe I should talk to the principal about you.”

  Oh, so she wanted to turn this around on me. I might not have been in my right mind, but nothing Tammy said would have made me deviate from the matter at hand. She did it, she knew we knew, and this was nothing more than Tammy wanting to have a little fun. I wasn’t in the mood.

  “I dare you,” I said. “We have three against one.”

  “Really?” Tammy turned to the cluster of girls. “Can you come here for a minute?”

  We watched five cheerleaders skip on over, looking as if they didn’t have a care in the world. Life must have been easy when the town nutter didn’t have a target on your back. Though if she kept on trying to make me a victim, then I would have to try my hand at that very same thing.

  “Girls,” Tammy said. “Can you tell these people here where I was Friday after school?”

  A short girl with tan skin answered. “You were with me and Jenny, practicing for the game. Why?”

  She looked to us. “Because they’re accusing me of something I didn’t do, and I wanted them to know that I have backup.”

  Poe spoke up next, getting closer to the girl. “We never told you this happened on Friday. If you’re going to lie, do it better. I think we deserve as much.”

  Tammy didn’t even blink. “The point being, I wasn’t where you said I was, and I have several people who could back me up on that. I’m not afraid of you, and I think you all need to go now. Thanks girls,” she said to her friends.

  “No problem,” the tan one replied. “If you need us, call.”

  They walked away, and Cathy looked after them. They all paused when the collars of their uniforms tightened. The girls made choking sounds, but Cathy released them. I would have told her to stop if she didn’t…eventually. Too many witnesses.

  When Tammy’s friends left, she smirked at us. “Sorry about the rabbit. I hope they find out who did that to you.”

  Cathy laughed, and the sound scared me. “You think you’re smart. You think you can get away with this because you have people willing to lie for you. Wrap yourself around that for as long as you can, because you’ll slip up. You’ll make a mistake you can’t cover up, and we’ll be there. I would be more than happy to get you thrown in a cell and the key tossed away.”

  Tammy gave a pouty frown. “You seem so stressed out. You should get a massage. They’re wonderful.”

  “You need to keep your goddamn mouth closed,” I threatened. “This isn’t funny. It’s one thing to try and scare me, put a note in a locker, intimidate me. But you took this too far.”

  The girl turned to look at us as she walked away. “No such thing.”

  We stood in a circle, working through the hate before we tried to come up with something to say. She’d pretty much admitted what happened, though it didn’t matter either way. We knew the truth. The problem was, I didn’t know how to stop her from going on. Tammy proved she was willing to harm me, as well as kill. An animal, sure, but still. She stabbed it to death with a pen or pencil, and that seemed like so much more than some petty teenage revenge.

  “How do we do this?” I asked. “How do we stop a sociopath?”

  Poe rubbed his jaw. “I really don’t know. I kind of wanna ignore it until it goes away thing.”

  Which didn’t do him good, since Brent kept coming by. I wasn’t willing to accept an on and off thing with Tammy. This needed to end, and end forever. I didn’t want her coming back into my life, and I refused to believe the end of the school year would have helped the cause. Tammy would have come for me anyway, if she was as crazy as she seemed.

  “That won’t do,” Cathy said. “Maybe we can scare her right back. Do something that would send her running. Surely we can be creeps, right? Just have to come up with something unnerving.”

  That might have worked, if I didn’t look like the least unnerving person in the world. “That could get us in trouble. I would be pretty pissed off if after all of this, us three were the ones to pay the price.”

  “I won’t let that happen,” Poe promised. “She can’t win. There’s no way.”

  I wanted to think that too.

  “Clover!” a girl called out to me. One look had me flinching, seeing Kelly a few yards away and getting closer. She didn’t have a weapon on her, so there was that. I still didn’t want to deal with whatever she had in store for me. A nap and pizza sounded better. “I need to talk to you.”

  “Kill me,” I whispered to Poe.

  He smiled. “I couldn’t do that. Then who would I daydream about in the shower.”

  “To be fair,” Cathy started. “You can still do that if she’s dead.”

  “True.” I nodded. “I’m of no use to you alive, so you might as well slam my head into the bleachers.”

  “Nah,” he still declined. “I have to at least get to second base with you first. It’s only fair.”

  While my skin burned, I pointed something out. “We skipped second base when you grinded your junk against mine.”

  Poe smiled happily. “Ah, memories. We simply must do that again.”

  “Play your cards right,” I said, and then got the hell out of there, heading to meet Kelly in the middle.

  We had a little privacy, in the sense that no one would have been able to hear us easily. They would have had to walk by, and focus to pick up on my quieter tone. I kept it that way, because it would have been easy for me to start screaming at Kelly.

  “Need something?” I asked.

  She inhaled deeply. “Peter can’t stop talking about you, Clover. Like, all the time, and it’s getting weird.”

  “Your boyfriend isn’t my problem, Kelly. He made sure of that. In fact, I’m getting really sick of Peter assuming we need to be in each other’s lives still. Nothing I do is his business, and I don’t care to make his or your life mine.”

  It was like she didn’t hear me at all. “Since he last talked to you, all I hear is your name. Wondering if you’re okay, complaining about you, and hoping that you call. What am I supposed to do with that? I can’t make him feel better, because you seem to be the only thing he wants. I’m his fucking girlfriend, and it’s like he can’t hear me.”

  Kelly must have thought it was up to me to make this all go away. I would have screamed at her if I thought I could have gotten away with it. But it would only give Peter a reason to come talk to me, and then this all started again. Peter thought he could talk to me whenever he wanted, uncaring of the sting in my chest that followed. Unaware that every word out of his mouth now, only caused me pain, and forced memories on me that I wanted nothing to do with. Memories that now, I saw all different than I had before. Only increasing my torment, now I had to wonder how many times Peter had tried to manipulate me. When he wanted to make sure I wouldn’t leave, or want to. He had me in the palm of his hand the entire time we’d been together, so I didn’t know why he thought he had to do that. I would have loved him forever, and done all I could to make him happy. He didn’t need to hurt me.

  I ran my fingers through my hair, stalling for a moment. “I don’t know what you think I
can say or do here. Is it not enough that I’m telling you I don’t want anything to do with Peter?”

  “No, it’s not enough because I don’t believe you. I know you love him, and I wouldn’t be surprised if you had some long plan to get him back.”

  You couldn’t fix stupid, yet, I would try anyway. “If Peter’s really been talking about me as much as you said he is, then you would know about Poe.” I pointed to the boy standing with Cathy, watching us. “That’s him. I like him. I want him. Not Peter. You’re safe. Anything you’re worrying about, it’s in your head.”

  Kelly looked at Poe for a long moment, tension making her body stiff. I didn’t get joy from her worry. I really didn’t. Honestly, I would have been happy if everyone left me the fuck alone. Why did I have to keep hearing about Peter? Couldn’t he stop existing now that I was finished with him? Was that so much to ask?

  “He kept them,” Kelly said quietly.

  “What?”

  She ripped her gaze from Poe, and looked me in the eyes. It made me uncomfortable. “I didn’t know where he got them at first. He keeps them on his shelves, everywhere. I kept myself from asking what they were, because I know you work glass. I didn’t want to get an answer I wasn’t looking for. Then I walked into his room yesterday, and he was holding one. Staring at it, like he thought it would start talking. This little glass figure.”

  Hearing that sent a little jolt through me. Peter didn’t throw away the things I made him. I had been sure those would have been the first to go, wanting to rid me from his personal space. He kept them, and had them in places where anyone could have seen them. I didn’t know what to say.

  “I know this is awful,” Kelly said. “Putting this on you, asking you for help. I can’t imagine what you think of me, but I know it isn’t good.”

  I didn’t deny it. “Then why are you here?”

  “Because I need to be sure you aren’t going to try and take him from me. It’s bad enough that I have to worry he might want you. I have to go through our whole relationship, wondering if he wants to be with you instead. If he’s thinking about you, missing you.”