by Parker, Ali
Damon's throat tightened as tears blurred his vision. He gripped Kendal tighter, hurting for his best friend in the same way he hurt for Matt when their mother died.
There were no words that would offer comfort. She's in a better place? Was she really? Damon had no clue. He didn't even fully comprehend what the better place might be or where it was. It seemed trite and too callous to offer a canned answer to his closest friend, so he didn't.
"Let's get you out of here, okay? I'll take you back to your apartment." Damon cupped the back of Kendal's head and pressed his cheek against his friend's. "I'm not gonna leave you to deal with this alone. You're not alone at all. I'm right here."
Kendal nodded and moved back before wiping his hands down his face. "I'm so numb. Every fear I had about this day is coming true. I kept hoping that I'd be married or have a family of my own before I lost Mandy. I knew the day would come, but it's early. Too early. She was fucking twenty-five, Damon. Just a baby."
Damon nodded and moved to wrap his arm around Kendal's shoulders. "Come on, man. We'll talk in the car and at your place. Let's get out of here, okay?"
"Yeah, just turn right when we walk out. I don't want to see Dana."
"The pretty dark-haired nurse out front?" Damon glanced down at Kendal as he pulled the door open. "Is she the one you casually mentioned the other day?"
"Yeah. Just turn to the right, all right?" he barked and pulled from Damon's grasp.
"All right. No problem." Damon moved up beside him and ignored the sweet sound of the girl’s voice as she called Kendal from behind them. He was in no place to talk to anyone, but fuck if it didn't feel like crap to leave her standing in the hall unanswered.
"I just can't." Kendal ran his fingers through his dark brown hair and got into the elevator, keeping his back to the door.
Damon got in and shook his head as the girl pressed her hands to her face and turned. The soft sound of her crying tore at his heart. Was she in love with Kendal? Now wasn't the time to ask, but there would be some comfort in knowing that someone cared about his best friend besides him. Bethany cared too, but Kendal wasn't going to let her too close to him. Damon had no doubt that Kendal holding Beth at arm’s-length was because of his friendship with Damon.
"My car is over there." Kendal pointed to the far part of the parking lot as they walked out.
"Don't worry about it. Matt and I will come get it later. Let's just get you home." Damon walked toward his car, moving to Kendal's side and opening the door for him. "Man, I'm sorry for not coming sooner. I'm a fucking horrible friend."
"It's all right." Kendal got in the car and leaned back, letting out a long sigh. "Just make it up to me and grab us a six pack before you hit the freeway."
"Of course," Damon mumbled before closing the door and walking to his side. Life was so damn fleeting. Amanda shouldn't have passed away so quickly, but it almost seemed like she'd given up. Being in bed for so many years had a tendency to wear on someone, but Kendal wouldn't let her see it that way. Maybe he should have been there more for her, not that Damon would have ever mentioned it, but his career, his profession had become the biggest roadblock in his life. He wasn't willing to bend on his career in any way whatsoever for anyone. Never. Not even a little.
Why?
"I'm gonna call Beth when we get to your place after you get settled." Damon glanced over at Kendal after he got into the car and buckled up. "She was worried about you."
"I bet." Kendal turned his face toward the window closest to him. "You need to make amends with her. She's a good woman, and you're fucking things up horribly. I've been fighting your fights for you, but it's your turn to man up and fix this shit or let her go."
Damon nodded, not willing to strike back at Kendal's comment. He was right in his assessment, and Damon was moving toward fixing things. It wasn't going to happen overnight, but it needed to happen. She was everything to him. Nothing mattered outside of her and yet he was scared as hell that he didn't have the power to fix it.
"I'm working on it, buddy." He started the car and put it in reverse as he let out a soft sigh. "I was trying to think through what the best way to get her back might be, and thinking back on the beginning when we met; I realize it was about physical attraction."
"That's true." Kendal turned his face toward Damon. "But that time is over. I think the attraction can always be present, but there was something that moved you from lust to love Damon. You proposed to the girl after a few weeks. That's not at all your style. What changed all of that?"
"For her?" Damon pulled out onto the road in front of the hospital and swallowed his pride for a minute. Kendal needed to focus on something besides Amanda, and Damon needed solutions. No matter how uncomfortable talking about everything was, he needed to get it off his chest. "I stood quietly beside her during the shit with Krista and Jake. I went to the apartment with her, the hospital, the jail..." He paused as his heart constricted in his chest. "She accepted my strength and wanted to help me heal from the shit that happened with my mother. I could see the future in her eyes, Kendal. I could feel it. For the first time in my life, I wanted a wife, a pretty house to offer her, and a few little ones running around. She has the power to change me. I can almost see myself being the man I've always wanted to be with someone like her."
"Someone like her?" Kendal winked and turned to look back out the window.
I reached over and patted his chest softly. "No. With her."
"Exactly," he whispered before closing his eyes.
"Thanks, man." Damon started to pull his hand back and decided against it. He patted Kendal's chest until his friend's breathing grew deep. There was no need to grab a six pack. Kendal needed rest and someone to listen and take care of him. Where Damon had no doubt in his mind that this Dana chick would be up for the task, he knew Kendal had already started to pull back from her. He wasn't sure why, but he would work to figure it out and help Kendal move past it.
Where Bethany was the right woman for him, he had no doubt that there was a woman who would heal all of Kendal's wounds and change him forever. Whether it was this Dana chick was yet to be seen, but Damon couldn't help but hope it was. The way the poor girl cried in the hallway as Kendal left spoke volumes.
What had happened between them to leave him pushing her away?
It had to be something related to his career. Where Damon wasn't willing to ask anytime soon, he figured it would soon come out in the wash. The next few days would be about Kendal healing. Nothing else.
Damon got his best friend into the apartment and tucked into bed before calling the office.
"I'm going to be out for the next few days. Reroute everything to my cell phone." Damon dropped down on the couch and closed his eyes as Linda went through the list of things he had scheduled. They worked to clear everything for him.
His next call was the most important he would make that day, but it also scared the hell out of him to do it.
"How is he?" Bethany answered the phone a little bit out of breath.
"He's pretty fucked up." Damon pressed his fingers to the bridge of his nose. "I can't imagine burying Matt."
"When is the funeral?"
"I don't know, but Kendal kept mumbling about Saturday, so I assume that's what he was talking about. He's asleep right now."
"You want me to come over there?" The woman on the other end of the phone was the girl he'd fallen so deeply in love with.
"Yeah, but it would be for selfish reasons. I'll give you a buzz later this week. I'm hoping maybe you'll come to dinner with me on Friday. I need to talk to you, Beth. Kendal needs me for the next few days, but I need to see you. I can't keep doing this shit. I need to clear the air completely between us."
There was an awkward pause, and for a minute, he thought she might have hung up. He held his tongue and waited for her to speak.
"Okay. I have to be in court all day Friday for Krista's hearing, but I can go to dinner later that evening."
"All right. I'll call you in a few days
. Take care, okay?"
"You too. Take care of Kendal, Damon. He's a good man."
"Yeah. He is."
They said their goodbyes, and Damon tossed the phone on the couch next to him. What would it take to have her say the same about him? He wasn't sure, but he wanted to try and be that guy. He'd won her over the first time by standing beside her the moment she needed him to the most.
Friday would be another chance, a chance he wouldn't be missing out on.
Chapter 88
Bethany
Damon being with Kendal for the last three days gave her a lot of time to think through things. If nothing else, she was willing to hear him out that night. She had a lot to say, but it almost seemed like the old Damon was back for a minute. The one who stood beside her at Jake's apartment and made love to her in Jamaica. Maybe all the pressures of getting back to work trying to be everything for everyone changed him. Her being his step-sister and his fiancée had to have weighed heavily on him.
"I'm not a victim," she mumbled before walking into the courtroom. The place was packed with students from the look of things. She didn't know many of them, but something told her that word had gotten around. Everyone loved a good train wreck, no matter who was involved.
Kendal sat near the back of the room, his face blank and eyes haunted. Bethany made her way over to him and sat down in the seat beside him.
"Hey. I'm so sorry about your loss." She slid her arm into his and pressed her cheek to his shoulder, not caring who was watching. It would seem that having to watch Jake and Krista tear each other apart during the court hearing that day wasn't the only pain she'd have to live through. Having Kendal there only made matters worse. He was required to testify, but he was in no shape to be anywhere.
"Thank you." He glanced down at her. "The funeral is tomorrow morning."
"I'll be there." She sat up but kept her arm wrapped around his.
"I will be too." Damon moved in and sat beside her, shocking her a little. He had to have been there with Kendal.
"I thought you were going to the office today," Kendal leaned around her and whispered softly.
"No. I wanted to be here for you and Beth." Damon glanced over at her and damned if her heart didn't skip a beat. Between his dark hair that curled up on the sides to his warm brown eyes, she found herself wanting to drown in him. With so much sadness all around her, he seemed to be the warmth she needed.
Funny how quickly that could change.
"I'm glad you're here." She sat back and turned her attention toward the front as he slid his arm behind her and gripped Kendal's shoulder tightly.
"I'll always be here for you, Beth," he whispered but kept his eyes on the front of the room.
There was truth in his statement.
The judge walked in, and everyone stood but Jake. He hadn't gotten to the point where he could stand or walk without help. Too much nerve damage. The door opened on the far side of the room, and a guard brought Krista out wearing a bright orange jumpsuit. Bethany realized that it had been a few weeks since she'd gone to see her old friend. The girl had lost far too much weight. Her cheeks were sunk in, and the dark circles under her eyes left her looking like death.
"Shit," Kendal murmured and shook his head. "She looks so much like Mandy."
"You wanna get out of here?" Damon leaned around her and glanced up at Kendal. "Just say the word, man."
"No." Kendal turned his gaze toward Damon. "Thank you though."
"You?" Damon glanced down at Beth.
"Yeah, but I don't have a choice. I have to testify today." She let her eyes move around his impossibly handsome face. There were so many things she wanted to tell him. I miss you being the first. It wasn't time to reconcile just yet though. They had to set a few things straight between them as family, then friends and if they could make it to the last round, lovers.
"I'd take it from you if I could." He reached out and brushed his thumb over her bottom lip as his eyes filled with foreign emotions.
"Somehow I believe that." She smiled and pulled his hand from her face. It was too much to have him touch her. It felt too good. Too right.
"Promise me that you guys are going to talk after this." Kendal turned to look down at Bethany and back up to Damon. "You're both driving me crazy. Life is too short for this shit."
"We are." Bethany reached over and patted Kendal's arm. "I promise."
"And you should talk with Dana sometime soon, Kendal." Damon's voice wasn't nearly as soft as Bethany thought it should be. It was obvious that Kendal was still trapped in a dark place due to his sister passing.
"She's going to be my student in a few days, bro. I can't do that. You understand."
"Nope. I don't." Damon sat back. "I think love is far more important than your career."
Bethany held her tongue as a million comebacks burst through her mind. Damon had forced her to put her engagement ring in a box when she came to work so that they wouldn't upset the delicate balance of how everyone at work felt about her. He was far more willing to give up everything for his career than Kendal seemed to be.
"Bullshit." Kendal leaned forward and narrowed his eyes. "You're not the one to be giving me this advice."
"All right, but I'm saying it because I love you like a brother." Damon shrugged. "Take me and Beth for instance. I fucked up big time with her at work. I tried to separate who we were when we were there and when we weren't. It caused her to feel like I was embarrassed that she was mine, right?"
Bethany nodded and turned to look up at him. "I know why you did it, but the reason doesn't matter. It hurt me."
"I know, baby. I'm sorry. I was wrong." He wrapped his arm around her shoulders. "I would take it back if I could. I don't give a shit what anyone thinks anymore. It's nothing but a lie anyway."
"So it's that easy? Just disregard the rules at UT and start dating a student?" Kendal barked a little too loudly. A few people turned around. He lifted his hand and apologized. "Sorry."
"No, man. Either tell her to drop the fucking course or stop teaching that type of accounting. Look at the options and stop pigeonholing yourself. You deserve love more than anyone else I know besides Beth. Fight for it, Kendal. Fight for it like life would stop without it." Damon patted Kendal's back. "We're going to figure this out. I'm not letting you mess this relationship up."
"There is no relationship." He glanced over at Damon with a sour look on his handsome face.
"You guys talk about this later." Bethany put her hand on Damon's thigh and glanced up at him, giving him a stern look. Only he could shut down the conversation. Kendal was too out of it to do anything more than react with whatever punches were thrown his way.
"Okay. You're right." Damon's eyes moved across her face slowly, holding her captive as if he had some sort of power over her. Sadly enough, he did.
The warmth of knowing that maybe not everything was lost between them caused her stomach to tighten. There was no one she wanted beside her, above her, all around her but the handsome asshole watching her so closely.
How did we let things fall apart?
She finally pulled her gaze from his and glanced up toward the front to find Krista turned around, her eyes locked on Bethany. Unsure of what to do, Beth did the only thing that seemed natural to her. She held her friend’s gaze, trying like hell to push as much sympathy into her expression as she could. They'd been friends for far too long for Beth to deny Krista anything. Her breakdown and not taking her medicine was at the core of what happened between her and Jake. Where some of it was her fault, some of it had to be blamed on her illness.
"I'm sorry, Beth," Krista mumbled. No sound came from her mouth, but Bethany could make out the words.
"Me too," she whispered back and blinked back tears.
Had the moment really come to have to get on the stand and testify against her best friend? Even with all the shit Jake had been through, he didn't want to see Krista put away either. There was nothing to do but tell the truth of all the events
that they would be questioned on, but damn if everything they had to say didn't leave Krista painted as a monster.
Hopefully her lawyers would be able to bring into the picture that she was a sick woman and her medication was the only thing that kept her from snapping. That was their only hope of saving her from prison for the rest of her life.
"You okay?" Damon whispered softly against Bethany's hair. The warmth of his breath and the dark scent of his cologne left her feeling far too emotional.
She leaned into him, taking comfort from his closeness even though it was the wrong thing to do. "Yeah. I will be when this is over."
After the opening statements were delivered by the attorneys, various people were called up to the stand. Bethany chewed on the side of her cheek, waiting her turn as the sickness in her stomach grew. Damon continued to hold her as the morning progressed, but with each new testimony, the situation for Krista grew more and more dim.
"The defense would like to call..."
Bethany faded out as fear raced through her veins.
"Beth. They called you up, baby." Damon pressed softly on her back.
"Oh. Okay." She got up and walked to the front, ignoring both Krista and Jake. She tried not to think too much about how badly her knees were shaking. She turned and faced the bailiff as he held out a Bible. "Lift your left hand and repeat after me."
She did as she was told and took her seat afterward. Everyone was looking at her, and for the first time in a long time, she thought she might have a panic attack.
The DA started to pepper her with questions, and for the first few, she stumbled over her words, not able to think clearly due to the intensity of the situation. She turned her attention toward Damon as he smiled warmly at her.
Something about the calm in his face caused her to release the breath she'd been holding.
He mouthed for her to breathe, and she nodded, forcing air slowly into her lungs. Everything calmed inside of her, and she felt her mind clear and her pulse slow a little. Him being there changed everything, which was enough proof for her that their relationship was far from over. He'd come to support Kendal no doubt, but she couldn't deny the way he watched her. It wasn't his normal domineering glare, but something softer. The strong man that demanded life to bow at his feet still very much lay underneath his loving demeanor, but he was holding back.