by Sara Schoen
“It’s going to hopefully get a little easier around here once everyone gets into their new roles. I’m ready for it to calm down a bit so I can relax. This job is hard.” He laughed lightly at his own joke as he leaned into me, warming me slightly. While other couples were open with their relationship now, we still kept ours low-key. It just felt right since we were leading CIRA to keep it second so agents wouldn’t feel ignored, but we were comfortable with it. “I’m not sure how Sharp Shooter handled the job, the loss, new recruits, and everything else. It never stops!”
“It won’t get any easier. You’ll just have more people to delegate to.” I smiled at him and leaned closer as I placed my head on his shoulder. “Life can be hard, and unfortunately that includes moments of loss.”
Images of my family flashed in my mind. Their smiles, family trips and holidays, laughter, and the feeling of unity. They were soon replaced by agents I had lost in my time in CIRA. From Whip Lash, Sharp Shooter and agents I had the pleasure of fighting alongside to Rum. Her death was still bittersweet, but I couldn’t cut ties like she had. I was loyal to the core, even if it hurt me.
“There’s moments of pure desperation,” I continued as memories of slicing my wrists to end the pain of loss and watching the blood spill from the wound stuck with me for a moment. “Moments of change, opportunity, and only passing moments of relaxation. New goals and friends are made constantly.” My sentence trailed off as I thought back over the years and what I went through to get to where I am now. Joining CIRA, cartel after cartel mission, fighting on my own, training to be welcome here and prove myself, making new friends, finding old family members, and now defending my new home with my own recruit. “Life has so much going on in it, and none of it is easy, but it’s so worth it.”
A small chorus of cheers interrupted me. I glanced down at the recruits, who were high-fiving and jumping with excited me, just in time to see Demon hold his hands up to signal the end of training. “That’s all. Congrats recruits. You’re now official CIRA agents.”
“We should go congratulate them and welcome them as official agents to CIRA,” Renegade whispered.
I nodded before I moved away from Renegade and took his hand in mine. He didn’t hesitate as he gripped my hand gently, yet firm, to lead me down the stairs. It’s his way of letting me know, he wasn’t letting me go. We’d be together through whatever came next and come out on top, even if some of our original team was leaving. We now had new teams to welcome into CIRA and many more missions to come. This wasn’t the end, this was just the beginning.
Acknowledgements
I want to dedicate this to everyone who inspired the characters, myself, and the story of this series. Firstly, I’d like to thank my family, as countless families in this series, for love, support, and undying love. I’ve been accepted into many families of friends, but my family is my backbone and what I fight for and support. CIRA and the families in my novels would have been nothing without you guys.
Taylor, you’re the perfect Camo. You’ve stood by me as Camo did for Night Stripe and been with me every step of the way through this series, and for countless other novels. You inspired the character and actions, but you’ve been my editor, my friend, co-write partner, and my support system. There’s a reason Camo will stand up for Night Stripe and for how their friendship progressed, and it’s because of us. I know you stand up for me in ways I may not even know and while our friendship had a bumping start Junior year, just look at where it’s progressed to. I couldn’t have done this without you. Thank you for editing, making the cover, and just being there for me.
Will, Renegade is a name that doesn’t truly fit you except in the series. You’d never abandon anyone who needed you, especially me. You stuck by me during a very difficult time in my life and pushed through my walls just as Renegade did for Night Stripe. Thank you for giving life to a character and, as he did for Night Stripe, a chance for me to open up again. You saved my life, and I can’t thank you enough for that. I’m excited to spend the rest of my life with you.
Avery, Spit Fire has been a great character. I can’t thank you enough for helping me create her and you supporting me in everything I’ve done on this journey. You’ve been the ultimate cheerleader for me in my journey. Thank you for being there and just wanting to hear about this even when I was unknown.
Sharp Shooters, a homage to the place that taught me to shoot an AR-15 and a hand gun. It was one of the best learning experiences to learn from someone who had been in SWAT and all over the world for the Army. Fantastic teachers who support and push you to learn.
Demon, an homage to my inner demons, otherwise known as previous characters, with a dark nature but a fun and caring side rarely seen.
Whip Lash and Renegade, to my teachers who gave a firm but caring hand. It took me a while to see that you did it to encourage me and push me, but I’m glad you saw something in me and did what you could to make me see my full potential.
And finally, Night Stripe, you were everything I wished I could be growing up. You were my idol, hero, and support system. You grew with me, inspired and encouraged me. I have so much to owe you that I didn’t want your story to end. You took me out of a dark time in my life, and have been with me for years. Ending your story is the hardest one I’ve ever had to. I wanted to carry on your legacy, and I hope this ending is what you needed and all you could want. Thank you for everything you’ve given to me. I couldn’t imagine a better companion throughout this journey. Good luck on future missions.