Second Chance with Brother's Best Friend: A Single Mom Secret Baby Romance

by Sofia T Summers

  Jace made a noise of frustration in the back of his throat. “You could’ve messaged me plenty of times in Basic…”

  “Right, before you went completely dark? I was scared, Jace. I’m not saying I did it perfectly, but I was young and I was scared. You’d just broken my heart, what was I supposed to do with that? You’d just left!”

  I realized that I was raising my voice and prayed that Sammy wouldn’t hear and wake up. The last thing that I wanted—the one thing that could make this worse—would be if Sammy found out the truth while Jace and I were still arguing.

  “And that justified you lying to me when I came back?” Jace snapped. His voice was low and terse, though, like he’d also realized the need to keep it quiet. “You let me think—you directly led me to believe that his father was another man.”

  “I didn’t lie,” I pointed out. Not technically, anyway. “I said that his father wasn’t in the picture. That was true. You weren’t in the picture!”

  “That’s playing with semantics and you know it. Christ almighty, Leigh, you could’ve told me the truth any number of times—what, were you going to just fucking keep at it for the rest of our lives? Let me think that he was someone else’s kid, some deadbeat who ran off?”

  “Technically, that’s what you did.” That was mean of me, and I knew it. Jace hadn’t known about Sammy’s existence at the time. I hadn’t even known about Sammy’s existence. Not until after Jace had left.

  “You should have told me immediately.” Jace folded his arms.

  “I shouldn’t have told you anything.” I pointed at him. “You had been gone for years. I had no idea if you were going to stay, or if you were for how long, what sort of life you wanted, or if you wanted to be any part of my life. I couldn’t subject Sammy to rejection. I couldn’t take a chance! If it was just me that would be one thing but to tell you and have you reject him or say okay and change your mind? I couldn’t risk it.”

  “You sure assumed a lot about me. You think I’m the type to abandon family?”

  “You abandoned me quickly enough.” I put my hands on my hips. “You said that you loved me. But you left without a word and never once called or wrote me.”

  “You’re wrong. I thought about you every fucking day.”

  “Then you should’ve told me that.”

  “You were going to art school and I was shipping out!”

  “What, did someone come to your house and put a gun to your head and say, join the military or else? You had a choice, Jace! You chose to join and you chose not to tell me! You still could have written. There’s no reason I couldn’t have gone to art school and been long distance with you.” I wanted to burst into tears, I felt like I was burning all over and not in the sexy, ‘I need you now’ kind of way but in a terrible, aching, sinking kind of way.

  Jace opened his mouth, then closed it. He still looked angry, but he also didn’t look like he had any kind of response. “You still should have told me.”

  “Whatever.” I was angry, and tired, and terrified of losing him but I also wasn’t going to give up my ground. I was like my brother that way, I supposed. I could be stubborn as well.

  Jace’s jaw clenched, and he moved around me, storming down the porch steps. What, no apology? Not even attempting to see things my way, to understand what it was like? Just storming off into the night?

  I watched as he walked to his car, got in, and drove off, all without a word. My heart felt like it was somewhere between my ankles. More tears sprang into my eyes and I didn’t bother wiping them away this time. I had a right to feel this way, and Jace needed to apologize to me. I would apologize to him. He was right. Dawn was right, when she’d said that lying to Jace would mess this whole thing up. She was going to lose her mind when she heard about this.

  But it was fifty-fifty. I’d messed up now, but Jace had messed up six years ago. Could he not see it? Would he not admit it?

  Had I lost him again, for good this time?

  25

  Jace

  I was reeling harder from this than if someone had punched me in the side of the head. It had never even occurred to me that Sammy could be my kid. Maybe it should’ve—thinking about it, fuck, the whole thing made sense.

  The timing, first of all. I’d been pretty fucking hurt, realizing how old Sammy was and doing the math, because it’d meant that Leigh had moved on from me pretty quickly. But that didn’t fit who Leigh was. She wasn’t someone who entered a relationship lightly. Or had a rebound to try and get over someone.

  Which made more damn sense—the idea that Leigh had gone and found some random guy in our small town, a guy who had then dropped off the face of the earth, and had a one night stand with him right after I’d left? Or the idea that I was the father?

  I felt like such an idiot. How had I not seen this? How had I not guessed? Fuck. This was all a huge goddamn mess. And I felt sick to my stomach in a way that not even the military had even given me. There was being sick over violence. There was horror over murder. But it was a different kind of horror—it was betrayal—to realize that such a big and personal secret had been kept from you.

  Even by the time I’d driven back to my house, I was still restless. I tried working out, hitting the punching bag over and over, having a beer, watching some mindless, funny television to distract myself, but nothing worked.

  In the early pre-dawn hours, when the world was soft and gray but the sun hadn’t quite crept up over the horizon, I went for a walk in the woods. Back in the day when I’d had a problem, that had been the only thing to really clear my head and get the last of the jittery, aching feeling out of my bones.

  It was a bit painful. I should’ve thought of that, but I was a fucking idiot and I didn’t until I was out there and I realized that the woods reminded me of Leigh, of our time together.

  Fuck, I had messed things up. My anger was fading by now, replaced with this aching sense of loss. Leigh shouldn’t have lied to me. But I could understand why she’d done it. She was right, I’d just left, and I’d been going into the military. How could she know how I’d take the news about the baby?

  I should’ve told her about the military plans. I should’ve said a proper goodbye. There was nothing I could’ve done about the pregnancy. Okay, sure, we could’ve used condoms, but the pregnancy wasn’t something we could fucking predict and plan for, not really. But going into the military? Yeah. Yeah, it was.

  Leigh was right.

  And fuck, that just made me think about all I’d missed out on. A whole five years. Sammy’s birth, his first word, learning how to walk, his birthdays… I’d lost out on all of that, because I’d been selfish. Because I hadn’t thought about what my leaving would do to Leigh, and so I’d never gotten to know about my son.

  Fuck.

  The sky was lightening around me as the sun rose, birds chirping. It was so peaceful here. Had Leigh come here while she was pregnant, trying to find peace? As shitty as it was for me, to feel like I’d missed out on Sammy’s early life… Leigh’d had to go through with it all on her own.

  Even with her family and Dawn—and I knew Dawn would never have abandoned Leigh, they’d been good as joined at the fucking hip for years—it couldn’t have been easy. Knowing that the father of her kid had just abandoned her without a word. She must’ve been fucking terrified of what my reaction would be, too scared to say anything so she just kept silent.

  Seeing things from her end, I could understand why she hadn’t reached out. And even if she’d tried—shit, once I was in covert ops, any letter she sent would’ve probably bounced back or taken twice as long as usual to get to me as my superiors tried to figure out if it was a secure letter or not.

  I leaned my hand against a tree, staring out at the creek that wound its way through the woods. Fuck. Maybe it wasn’t such a big surprise that she’d hid the truth from me. After so long alone… she must’ve gotten used to it. And I’d run away last time when she’d been going to fucking art college. How could she do
anything except assume that I might do something similar if she dropped the bomb about my kid on me?

  We’d been in love, and then I’d just left.

  I blew out a breath, feeling the morning sun warm me. I wished there was someone I could talk to about this. Leigh had a right to be upset with me but I also felt I had a right to be upset about her lying to me.

  Normally I would’ve talked to Andy about this. But, well. Now I knew why he was so fucking angry with me. I’d knocked up his sister and abandoned her. I was on Leigh’s side about that. Andy shouldn’t have told me. And Christ, I hadn’t known about the kid! But he still had a right to be a bit upset, and whether it was right or wrong, I had a feeling if I tried to talk to him he’d deck me. Especially since Leigh was pissed at him.

  There had to be someone I could discuss this with. I needed a clear head so that I could move forward—for everyone’s sake.

  26

  Leigh

  God, I felt sick to my stomach.

  I’d had a good cry last night and had taken a melatonin pill so that I could sleep last night. God knew if I was up all night upset I wouldn’t be able to have the patience for Sammy today that he deserved. None of this mess was his fault, after all. Poor kid. Caught in the middle and he didn’t even know it.

  Sammy got up and I got him to school without incident, so thank God for that. But now it just left me alone in the house with nothing to distract me from my thoughts or my mistakes. Dawn had been right. Not that she’d say I told you so, she was too gracious for that (at least about big things like this), but… I should’ve told Jace right away. Okay, maybe not right away. But definitely after the first time we had sex.

  I’d let him into our lives, into Sammy’s life, let him interact with Sammy… and the whole time I had lied to him about who Sammy was, and who he was to Sammy. It was unfair. And now Jace probably hated me, and he had a reason to. The hurt he’d dealt me didn’t excuse my lies.

  Jace would’ve made such a wonderful father to Sammy. Sammy already thought he was great. Was it too late now?

  I looked around the house, trying to find something to do to distract myself. I could do some deep cleaning if I wanted to, but the house was already picked up. Dishes were done, no toys were out… I collapsed onto the couch instead, rubbing my temples.

  What was I supposed to do now? How could I possibly fix this?

  There was a knock on the front door and my heart leapt—in hope or anxiety, I didn’t know. I shot up straight and found myself clutching at my hair, as if I was going to somehow miraculously fix whatever mess it was just by grabbing it.

  “Leigh?” It wasn’t Jace—it was Andy. He sounded tentative. “Hey, it’s me. Can I come in?”

  Did I want to see him and let him in? On the one hand, hell no. I’d told him to stay away and I’d meant it. But on the other hand… he was my brother. He’d helped me with Sammy all these years while Jace wasn’t in the picture. He was the closest thing to a dad that Sammy had, even though he’d always made it clear to Sammy that an uncle wasn’t quite the same thing.

  I couldn’t have done it without my brother’s help. His understanding when I needed to take time off from the hardware store to help Sammy, letting Sammy play in the store, all of it. As frustrated as I was… I figured I owed it to him to try and make things right. He sounded contrite enough, through the door anyway.

  With a sigh, I got up from the couch and walked over, opening the front door. Andy had coffee in his hand, which he offered up immediately. “Hey.”

  I took the coffee and opened the door wider, letting him in. “Hey.”

  Andy came in but didn’t sit down, his hands in his pockets. I closed the door behind him and waited. He blew out a breath. “I mean, I don’t know how else to say it besides… I was an asshole, last night. A serious asshole. It was a violation of your trust to tell him that.

  “Not that I’m excusing myself but—I was angry. I really was, and I let that get the best of me. I know that Jace didn’t know about Sammy. It wasn’t like he left you at the altar or after he’d seen the ultrasound. But you’re my sister and you deserve the world, and it’s hurt me all this time to watch you bust your ass to take care of this kid, and then Jace comes in and he’s with Sammy and having fun with him and sleeping with you and no clue about his responsibility. Thinking he could still walk away any time.” Andy shook his head. “It made me feel sick and I saw red. It wasn’t okay.”

  I sipped the coffee. It was delicious, I had to admit.

  “Anyway.” Andy sighed. “You’re an adult. You can make your own choices and that includes sleeping with whoever you want. I should work on trying to forgive Jace for what he did. He was stupid, but he apologized for leaving us, and he didn’t know about Sammy. I can’t be mad at him over something he didn’t know about.”

  Damn right he couldn’t. I was relieved that Andy was apologizing so quickly. I would’ve thought that he’d take a lot longer to come around. That was one problem dealt with, at least. “Thank you. I really to appreciate the apology.”

  Andy shrugged. “Yeah, well. It was overdue. I should probably apologize to Jace, too.”

  I winced, and Andy gave me a look. “Oh, don’t tell me you two haven’t patched things up.”

  “It’s been barely twenty-four hours. He’s angry, Andy, and he’s got a right to be.” I sipped more of my coffee. “I lied to him about Sammy’s father. I let him believe the father was someone else. Dawn tried to warn me, but I didn’t listen.”

  “Jace isn’t the type to hold a grudge. When he and I would fight as kids, he was always the first one to apologize. I was always the stubborn bastard holding out.”

  “I’m not sure. I made a pretty major fuckup.”

  “Don’t be too hard on yourself. Do you want me to… uh…” Andy cleared his throat. “Go over to Jace and try and smooth things over? I gotta apologize anyway, so. Maybe if he talks to me, it’ll help him get his frustration out and I can explain your side of things.”

  That surprised me. I didn’t say anything because I knew it would just embarrass him, but it meant more than I could say to know that Andy would be willing to lay aside his pride for me.

  “Thanks,” I told him. “Really. It means a lot. But I don’t think it’ll help. The fact is… he shouldn’t have had to hear about that from you because I should’ve already told him. I should’ve been honest with him from the start.”

  Andy seemed to consider that. “Maybe. I think you’ve both got reason to be upset. But I think you’re underestimating him. He’s always been a good guy. Just give him some time.”

  I wasn’t so sure about that. I appreciated Andy’s hopefulness and his reassurance, but I just couldn’t get my hopes up. It felt too… dangerous, honestly. What if I got hopeful and then was wrong, and Jace really did still hate me?

  “Give him time,” Andy repeated. “If he could forgive me after all the shit I’d pull on him in high school, I’m sure he’ll understand and forgive this.”

  He patted my shoulder, a little awkwardly, and then left. Normally we would hug—we’d always been affectioned with each other—but he could probably sense that I wasn’t in the mood for a whole lot from him right now. I might’ve accepted his apology but I would still need a little distance so I could properly forgive him.

  And I really didn’t want to keep having a conversation back and forth about Jace. I just… wanted to try and figure out what to do next. How to move forward without him in my life, just when I’d gotten used to having him in it again.

  I sat back down on the couch, coffee still clutched in my hands. What was I going to do now?

  27

  Jace

  Unlike Leigh, who could tell her brother that he could shove it up his ass and she wasn’t going into work that day, I still had to go and get my work done for Rachel. I hadn’t seen her since the whole, ah, incident. I felt bad about that. Not about how I’d handled it or about rejecting her, but just that she’d been so embarrassed.
I had to remind myself that it was, unfortunately, her choice to be so brazen after I’d already told her no, and if she was embarrassed, it was kind of her own fault.

  But I did still feel bad, and I tried to make the house as good as I could as a kind of… almost-apology?

  Normally working got me out of my head. I’d always found something to do on base when I was struggling with something. I’d fix up broken down vehicles, or clean out all the guns, or do the laundry for everyone. Something physical that forced me to concentrate so I could get out of my own damn head. But right now, nothing was working. I kept getting distracted, thinking about Leigh, about how I should be over there right now apologizing to her.

  Would she even want me over there, though? After I’d been selfish? I hadn’t considered what it had been like for her all this time. I could’ve shown my anger at her lie without also stomping all over her feelings and ignoring the way she’d had to raise Sammy all on her own.

  If I was going to apologize to her, it had to be something big…

  I roamed the house, checking up on things, trying to find something to distract me. But Leigh was everywhere. Especially when I got upstairs and remembered how we’d slept on the mattress, the skylight above us. Fuck, Leigh had been so beautiful. She always was, making me lose all damn sense and reason, sleeping in the bed of a client.

  I paused outside of the bedroom where Leigh had been painting the mural for Rachel’s daughter. It was a beautiful forest scene. I paused in the doorway, looking around. Honestly, any kid would be glad to grow up in a room painted like this. I wondered why Leigh hadn’t painted Sammy’s room. I could picture Sammy’s bedroom clear as day in my mind. It was a cheery room, with some pictures on the walls of Leigh’s family and some animals and a couple paintings that I was pretty sure had been done by Leigh. But how much more would Sammy love it if he had a whole forest he was playing in?