Married to Krampus (My Holiday Tails)

by Marina Simcoe

“No. I’m glad I did.” I glanced up at him. “You see, I’m not ashamed of my toes. I’ve had them for over twenty-five years now, and I love them just the way they are. I’ve painted them in pretty colors and proudly displayed them in strappy sandals and flip-flops all my life. I’m not embarrassed by having feet, no matter what you may think about them. The only reason I’ve changed my shoes is because I really couldn’t handle seeing the same look you had back there on the face of every Voranian I’m about to meet tonight.” I heaved a long breath. “Not tonight. It’s already been a very stressful few days.”

  I tried to take my hand away from him again, but he laced my fingers with his then covered my hand with his other hand. There was no way for me to retrieve it now, and I decided I didn’t want to take it away after all, leaving it in his possession. My hand felt rather nice, cradled there in the warmth of his two large, rough palms.

  “I didn’t mean to offend you, Daisy.” His voice was deep, his tone as gruff as always. However, a softer note slipped into it. “It just... It was unexpected.”

  “My scary toes?” I rolled my eyes.

  “You’ve worn closed-toe shoes before tonight, and I’ve never seen bare feet before,” he explained, sounding defensive. “I’ve heard of toes, but... I’m sorry, okay? Can you forget about all of this, please? I want you to enjoy tonight.”

  I thought back to meeting the Voranians for the first time, at the spaceport. Quite a few of their physical attributes had shocked me then, their hooves included. Even my sister had called the Colonel “scary-looking.”

  “I understand. I’m not offended,” I said to him. I never could stay upset with someone for too long, anyway. “I thought your eyes were scary, too, at first.”

  “My eyes?” He blinked. “Scary?”

  “Humans don’t have red eyes. Seeing them was a bit unsettling at first.”

  “At first.” He tilted his head to the side. “But how about now?”

  I looked up, finding his eyes with mine. Sitting this close to him in the confined space of the aircraft, with my hand held in both of his, awareness suddenly rushed me, and I dropped my gaze down, saying nothing.

  “I’ve been told I have fierce eyes.” His voice dipped lower, an unfamiliar velvet note in it reached deep inside my chest with warm resonance. “Do you still find them scary, Daisy?”

  He slid a finger under my chin, lifting my head and forcing me to meet his eyes again—fire red, with coal-black slits for pupils.

  “Definitely fierce,” I said quietly. My head was spinning slightly, as if I were falling somewhere. Maybe under a spell? I swallowed hard. “Intense, but not scary.”

  He leaned closer, brushing his thumb along my lower lip, and I quickly tucked it between my teeth. The aircraft seemed way too small all of a sudden, the vivid colors of the sunset closed in all around us.

  “Are we there yet?” I asked, unable to tear my gaze away from his eyes that appeared to grow brighter and hotter.

  “There?” As if yanked back to the reality, he blinked, his bushy eyebrows moved closer. “Yes. Almost. But there was something else I wanted to do before we arrive.”

  Leaning over my lap, he slid open an aircraft compartment in front of me and took out a flat, orange box.

  “I want you to wear these tonight.”

  He opened the lid of the box and took out a cluster of orange-green balls, each about the size of a marble.

  “What is it?” I squinted at them, wondering what he meant by me wearing this.

  “It’s the jewelry set my father gifted to my mother when he was courting her.”

  The baubles looked more like a child’s dress-up beads than anything a grown woman would wear, but I loved the bright shimmering colors.

  “It’s pretty.”

  Shifting closer, he circled my neck with the necklace, closing the clasp at my nape. The numerous strings of baubles draped over my entire chest, nearly reaching my waist.

  “Did she end up marrying him?” I felt very much like a Christmas tree now, hung with bright, round ornaments.

  “She did.” He took out two spirals strung with the same balls of orange, green, and brown swirls. “This is shalel, an extremely rare mineral mined only on the planet Aldrai. My father paid a fortune for this set, back in the day. And it’s truly priceless, now.” He wrapped one spiral around each of my forearms. “My father gave it to me after the ceremony at the Governor’s Palace last year, right after the announcement of my upcoming marriage was made.”

  I’d been excited to be selected as the first bride to go to Neron. For the Colonel, I understood, this marriage held an even bigger significance. In Voran, our union was a state affair—a really big deal.

  “I am the first son of my father’s to get married,” the Colonel continued. “He wanted you to have this.”

  “Thank you.”

  I took out my fresh-water pearl studs to let him put the long strings of baubles in my ears.

  “How many brothers do you have?” I asked while he was doing it.

  “Four. The fifth one died at birth, along with my mother.”

  “Oh, no,” I gasped. “I’m so sorry, Colonel.”

  He furrowed his brow slightly, moving a shoulder back. “It happened more than thirty-four years ago. Enough time has passed.”

  “Time definitely helps.” I released a sigh. “But do we ever fully heal from a loss? My Grandma passed away when I was sixteen, and I still miss her every day.”

  “How about the rest of your family?” he asked after a pause. “Are they well?”

  “Yes. My parents are alive and well. And I have an older sister, who is married and has two children, a boy and a girl, my niece and nephew.” I smiled, thinking about all of them.

  He stared at me intensely.

  “You miss them.” It wasn’t a question.

  “I do.” I nodded, stifling another sigh.

  “Is that why you want to go back home?”

  “What? No. I’ve made the conscious decision to leave my home and family to come here.”

  “Why did you come to Voran, Daisy?”

  This question he should have asked me a long time ago. Preferably even before he had made the call to bring me here. He should have asked me why I was ready to move planets to come live with him. Or better yet, he should’ve read my damn letter.

  I inhaled deeply then looked straight into those bright red eyes of his. There was no point in lying, it’s not like I needed to worry about what he’d think of me, now.

  “Because I hoped to find my place and my purpose here, Colonel. I was looking forward to making my home here and to raising a family with you.”

  “My family,” he echoed.

  “Right.”

  I had hoped that he, his children, and I might all become one happy family one day, but that seemed like another lifetime, now—the time when I still had silly hopes and before I had the “pleasure” of meeting the Colonel in person.

  I turned away, and we sat in silence for a few moments.

  Never a fan of silence unless I was alone, I broke it first, “Where are your brothers? And your dad?”

  “They all live in Kixel, the small town where I grew up.”

  “Are they coming to visit you any time soon?”

  “No.”

  He promptly lifted another string of balls from the box, leaning in to inspect my ear again.

  “How many holes do you have pierced in your ear?” he asked, obviously changing the subject.

  I shifted in my seat. “Just one in each.”

  “All right then.” He dropped the remaining baubles back into the box then put the whole thing back into the compartment. “These will have to do.”

  HANDS SPLAYED ON THE glass of the aircraft side, I stared at the brilliant cluster of glass domes on top of a wide skyscraper. Lit from within with multi-colored lights, the entire structure stood out against the dying sunset like a humongous precious jewel.

  “The Governor’s Palace,” the Colon
el announced, gesturing at the magnificent contraption of glass, color, and light.

  The aircraft pulled over and landed on a small open platform with a glass walkway connected to it. The edge of the walkway fused with the side of our aircraft, sealing out the winter air. The door of the aircraft slid open, and we both got out.

  The short walkway led us under the first glass dome.

  “Wow!” I spun around, taking in the shimmering lights under the tall arches of bright, luscious flower garlands everywhere.

  Voranians dressed in bright clothing lingered in small groups here. Everyone’s attention shifted to me as soon as I set my foot on the lush grass under the dome. But the main party appeared to be happening under the largest dome of the cluster, straight ahead.

  “Let’s go.” The Colonel offered me his elbow in a gallant gesture.

  A huff of air escaped from my chest. A hefty dose of anxiety mixed in with my excitement and anticipation.

  “Okay.” I gripped his arm, plastering a wide smile on my face. “Let’s do this.”

  As we moved under the main glass dome, the attention of the crowd thickened. Curious stares glided down my body, making my skin prickle with unease and the fine hairs on my arms stand up. My heart raced as I wondered what they all thought about me—the pale, hornless, and tailless redhead from another planet.

  The Voranians themselves presented something amazing to look at. The males’ richly decorated clothes had been obviously created to attract attention. Most men present had their hooves and horns painted with designs that matched their outfits.

  The Colonel steered me to a group of men in the middle of the room. A circle of them parted as we approached, revealing a tall male in a long dress coat in gold, green, and white. His lemon-yellow eyes lit up with excitement when his gaze fell on me.

  “Oh, and there she is! You’ve been keeping her all to yourself for way too long, Kyradus.” He took a few steps to us and grabbed my free hand in both of his. “Madam Colonel.” He smiled, tipping his elaborately painted horns my way.

  “Governor Ashir Kaeya Drustan,” the Colonel introduced the man to me.

  “Oh, Governor...” Having no clue of what the protocol was or even if there was one, I dipped into a curtsy. “I am very honored to meet you.”

  “Isn’t she a delight?” the Governor gushed, glancing over his shoulder to his entourage as if inviting them to join in his admiration. “Polite and lovely. And so exotic.” He yanked down a lock of my hair that had fallen over my shoulder, watching with clear fascination as the curl bounced back when he released it. “Just between you and me,” he leaned closer, as if about to share a secret with me, “I find the rest of your human delegation exceptionally dull and boring.”

  I found nothing to say to that, simply smiling wider and staring at him like a complete idiot.

  “Tell me, Madam Colonel, how do you find life on Neron, so far?” he asked me. His lemon eyes twinkled with curiosity from under his impossibly long eyelashes.

  His lively, out-going manner put me at ease, melting some of the initial apprehension. I didn’t even mind his way of talking about me as if I were an exotic bird at first.

  “Well, I haven’t seen much of Neron yet,” I ventured carefully, hoping it didn’t sound like a complaint.

  “Still,” he insisted, waving his hand at the room and the crowd that now surrounded us. “All of this must be so very different from what you’re used to.”

  “Oh yes, it is.” I kept my gaze on him, trying to ignore the growing number of Voranians congregating around us. The attention of the entire ballroom-full of people was overwhelming. “The differences between our worlds are mind-blowing. But to help me feel at home in Voran, I prefer to focus on similarities for now.”

  His groomed eyebrows shot up to his horns painted with green vines and golden flowers.

  “Do you find there are many similarities?” he sounded incredulous.

  “Quite a few.” I nodded firmly. “Possibly even more than differences.”

  He tilted his head, curiosity shining through his expression.

  “Pray tell.”

  “Well, like humans, Voranians have two eyes, two hands, a nose, and a mouth.” I stopped myself from saying two feet.

  Tossing his head back, the Governor released a loud, hearty laugh.

  “Cannot argue with that!” He shook his head, turning to the crowd around us.

  The men laughed in response, too, clapping their hands.

  “What else?” He gazed back at me, excitement bouncing in his eyes.

  “Like you, we live in houses, build cities, and travel in vehicles.” I thought about the reasons why the Colonel had been rewarded with a marriage and why he’d been insisting on keeping it. “Both our species value courage, loyalty, and friendship. All of us hold honor and gratitude in high regard. That is a good start, I think.”

  “It most certainly is.” The Governor kept smiling, looking both amused and impressed.

  The man at his right lowered his head to his boss’s ear. “I beg your pardon, Governor, but we’re on a tight schedule, tonight.”

  I followed his gaze, glancing back over my shoulder. A line seemed to be gathering behind us. People waited for their turn to greet the Head of the State.

  “Kyradus,” the Governor addressed my husband, who remained by my side. “Make sure you bring her by again before you two leave tonight.” He then turned to me, squeezing my hand in both of his once again. “I’d love to hear what you think about our little event.”

  Chapter 9

  GAPING AT MY SURROUNDINGS, I almost forgot that everyone at the ball was gaping at me. A colorful band of Voranian men played lively music on the stage under the garlands of white and gold flowers. Shiny chrome stands with trays of finger foods and drinks glided through the crowd.

  Feeling like an outsider, I was grateful to the Colonel for sticking by my side. People kept coming up to us to talk to him and to gawk at me.

  “Grevar!” A high voice shrilled though the air suddenly.

  An unusually short Voranian appeared in front of us. A female, I realized, spotting her pink-and-yellow dress that highlighted her bright magenta eyes.

  “I’m so happy to see you.” She grabbed the Colonel by his ears, yanking his head down for a smooch on his lips.

  Apparently, Voranian women were even friendlier than the men, the usual two-handed handshake didn’t cut it for her.

  “You brought your wife?” She turned to me with a delighted smile.

  “Hi—” I started, but she didn’t let me finish. Getting hold of my ears, she placed an energetic kiss on my mouth, too.

  Was that a Voranian women’s thing, then? To kiss strangers as a form of greeting?

  I could taste her sweet lipstick on my lips. From the corner of my eye, I glimpsed the Colonel discreetly wiping his mouth with the fur on the back of his hand. I couldn’t do the same as my ears were still firmly gripped in the dainty fingers of the tiny woman.

  “I’m so proud of Grevar,” she gushed. “He got a wife!”

  “Lucky man.” I wiggled my eyebrows.

  “Luck has nothing to do with it.” She shook her head, the strings of tiny silver bells on the tips of her horns clinked melodiously with the gesture. “He totally earned it. Right, cousin?”

  “Cousin?” I glanced at the Colonel.

  “Lievoa,” he introduced the woman to me. “One of the four children of my father’s brother.”

  “And the only daughter,” Lievoa added with pride, finally letting go of my ears that now felt flaming hot.

  “I’m Daisy.” I dipped my head in a polite bow.

  “I know. Your name was announced as soon as Grevar had selected you.” She leaned a little closer. “It must’ve been a difficult task. I’ve heard there were thousands of applications to choose from.”

  “Exactly,” I said, not hiding the sarcasm in my voice for the benefit of the Colonel who remained in the earshot. “The selection process should’ve t
aken weeks, if not months.”

  “Apparently, it took him less than an hour!” She pressed her clasped hands to her chest. “He must’ve known you were the one the moment he saw your picture. It was destiny.”

  “Destiny,” I muttered under my breath. “Or a bright ‘lucky’ dress.”

  A group of men approached the Colonel, diverting his attention from us.

  “Speaking of dresses.” Lievoa glanced down my body. “You like this one?”

  “This?” I smoothed my hand down the soft, luxurious fabric. “I love it.”

  “Really?” She beamed at me another delighted smile. “Oh, it makes me so happy. It came from my dress shop.”

  “It did?”

  “Surely, you didn’t think that Grevar assembled the entire wardrobe for you all on his own. As soon as your sizes had been confirmed, he called me in panic, begging for help.”

  I slid my hand down my skirt again. Panicking and begging definitely didn’t appear like the Colonel’s style. However, something inside me warmed at the thought that he hadn’t been completely indifferent about my arrival.

  “The wardrobe is exquisite. The dresses, the shoes... I should have known he’d had some help.”

  “Of course he did.” She threw a sympathetic look at the Colonel, who was talking to the group of men and could no longer hear us. “The poor guy has been wearing nothing but army uniforms most of his life. He had no idea where to even begin as far as women’s clothing was concerned. Luckily, I have great taste. Most of the dresses I sell in my shop I design myself.”

  “You do? Is this one your design, as well?”

  “Yes!”

  I touched, the embroidery of my bodice with a new appreciation.

  “This is amazing, Lievoa. You’re very talented.”

  “Thank you.” She smiled wide at me. “There aren’t that many women in Voran who can truly appreciate a well-made garment.”

  “Well, there aren’t that many women in Voran. Period.” I laughed. “You are the first one I’ve met.”

  “Oh no! We need to rectify that. Come.” She tugged me by my hand. “I’ll introduce you to the women here that I know.”