The Doctor Who Has No Ambition (Soulless Book 9)

by Victoria Quinn

  He lifted his gaze and looked at me again, his brown eyes turning steely and focused. That charismatic and playful guy disappeared, and there was a new man sitting in front of me, someone who had become withdrawn and thoughtful, mulling over my words like he could play them in his mind all over again, from start to finish.

  “I know it’s easy to focus on the bad instead of the good sometimes, but you’ve done far more good than bad. Whatever happened…forgive yourself. You’re a superhero without a cape. People need you.”

  He shifted his gaze out the window and stared into the darkness for a while, his jaw suddenly tight, his eyes showing the internal loathing he had to battle. “I appreciate the flattery—”

  “It’s not flattery. It’s fact.”

  He turned quiet again.

  “I’m not going to accept defeat from you, Dex. If I do, people will die.”

  He slowly turned back to me and looked at me once more.

  It wasn’t an exaggeration. I wasn’t being melodramatic. If patients didn’t get access to the best hands in the world, their outcomes would be completely different. They would go to doctors who didn’t care whether they lived or died, just the fancy cars parked at their mansions in upstate New York. “Are you with me?” I couldn’t downplay my passion because it was a vital part of my soul. I’d never been so committed to anything in my life, ever felt a calling that spoke to me on such a deep level.

  He hadn’t blinked since he’d looked at me again. This was a version of Dex I’d never met before, someone who absorbed his surroundings with seriousness, someone who didn’t deflect his experiences with insincere humor. “Yeah…I’m with you.”

  I stepped into the medical office with Tim and tried not to make a big reaction.

  It was on one of the top floors of a prime building in Manhattan, having one hell of a view of the city, the park, and even the ocean.

  “It was remodeled just this last year.” Tim wore a suit and tie because he was one of the biggest real estate agents in the city, handling commercial properties that pulled in quite the pretty penny. “New hardwood floors, new windows, great energy, the flow is perfect for a medical office.” He showed me the space, the waiting room, the main desk where I’d be handling patients at check-in, along with the different exam rooms as well as a couple offices. One of the offices was in the corner with a glorious view of the city—and I imagined that’s where Dex would reside. “So, what do you think?” We returned to the lobby area, and he stood with his hands in his pockets.

  “It’s beautiful, obviously.” I didn’t take any notes because it was unnecessary. There was nothing I would change, and while I thought someone of Dex’s caliber deserved an office like this, I couldn’t imagine how he’d be able to pay for it. “What price point are we talking?”

  “Cleo gave me the budget, and it’s just slightly below that.”

  Now I knew how Dex would pay for this. I pulled out my phone and read the message I’d just received from Dex. I’m in the elevator. Be there soon.

  “Sorry, Dr. Hamilton is running late. He’ll be here in a minute.”

  He nodded. “I’ll meet you in the lobby downstairs so you guys can have some privacy.” He walked to the elevators, and when the doors opened, they greeted each other with pleasantries before Dex joined me in the main waiting area with the big windows.

  He was in jeans and a hoodie, casual like his father always seemed to be. He stood beside me, and his eyes scanned around, taking a look at the space with a hard gaze. He crossed his arms over his chest.

  “What do you think?”

  “I think my parents are ridiculous.” He stepped away and headed into the hallway.

  I followed him and watched him enter the patient rooms, which were currently empty. As if he could visualize his equipment and the furniture, he walked around with his fingers cupping his chin. Then he abruptly left and moved into the other rooms, checking the corner office at the end. “This place reminds me of my old practice.”

  I lingered behind as I clipped my pen to my notebook, watching Dex’s muscular frame remain rigid as he walked to the windows and took a look at the world around him. “Was it here in Manhattan?”

  He was quiet for a long time before he gave a short answer. “Yeah.” He turned back around and walked toward me, having barely looked at me since walking inside. His mind seemed to be filled with a lot of information now that he was getting back into his field. There was no extra space for jokes or pleasant conversation. “The price?”

  “When I asked, he said it was within Cleo’s budget.”

  He released a loud sigh in irritation as his hands moved to his hips. He stared at the wall for nearly a minute, deep in thought. “I guess there’s no other way. I can’t get a loan. I should be able to pay them back within a year.”

  “Why can’t you get a loan?”

  “No collateral.” He left the office and returned to the lobby where the patients would wait to be seen.

  He’d practiced medicine for many years, so I imagined he had quite the nest egg saved up in a savings account. It didn’t make sense that he lived in Brooklyn. I wanted to know why he needed his family’s money at all, but I knew it wasn’t my place to ask. “Let’s do it.”

  My train of thought faded away when I heard the sweet sound of his cooperation. He was finally on board with this, finally committed to making this work. “Great. I’ll let Tim know. Let’s go to our next stop.” I turned to the elevator.

  “I’m taking this place, so what does it matter?”

  I turned back around. “He’s going to show us a place for you to live.”

  He gave me a cold stare, clearly not pleased by that. “I have an apartment.”

  “Your mother said that you need to be closer to work—”

  “My apartment is fine. I can get a new place on my own when I’m ready.” He walked past me and headed to the elevator.

  I knew Cleo wouldn’t be happy about that, but I doubted she would push him. I joined him in the elevator, and we descended to the lobby. When we met Tim, we agreed to take the space and get the paperwork in progress. Then we stepped outside onto the sidewalk.

  “I’ll get started on ordering everything and get it here as quickly as possible. Do you have a list? In terms of medical equipment, I know the basics, but if you need anything more extensive, I’ll need some help.”

  “I’ll email you a list.” With his hands in his pockets, he looked into the street and watched the cars pass, mostly town cars and taxis. The weight of the stress was obviously getting to him because his personality had flipped drastically.

  It made me wonder if I ever really knew Dex in the first place. “I know it’s not my place, but it really does make sense for you to move to Manhattan. You shouldn’t have a forty-five-minute commute when you have so much other stuff to worry about.”

  He turned back to me, his eyes a little cold. “When I’m ready, I will.”

  “Have you left your job at the lab yet?”

  “No.”

  “Well, I contacted Columbia University about a part-time teaching position there in the Columbia Cardiac Surgery Center, and they said they would be honored to have you as part of their faculty.”

  His brown eyes weren’t kind and warm anymore, and now he seemed annoyed all the time.

  “Based on the types of positions you’ve had in the past, I thought you might enjoy taking on different roles. Your office was only open two days a week, and I imagine you would do that again. There’s also a research position at Kline Clinic, where you worked before. When I contacted them and asked if they had any open positions, they said no, but they would reinstate you in a heartbeat because it would be an honor to work with you.” Every time I contacted these places, they were cold and dismissive toward me, but the second I mentioned Dex’s name, it was a complete 180. Every person was enamored of him, would move mountains to get him at their facility.

  Dex’s expression didn’t change at all, his eyes shifting
back and forth slightly, processing my information with no reaction at all.

  “I thought you might like to do something different, so I contacted Doctors Without Borders, and they said they would be happy to include you in a quarterly rotation to bring you to underprivileged communities around the world.” Maybe I was pushing too much on him, but I wanted to give him all his options, to get him excited to return to work.

  His stare lasted a long time.

  I assumed I wouldn’t get a response. “Or if you just want to focus on patient care—”

  “Give me some time to think about it.”

  That was a win to me. “Sure. I’ll get to work on everything else and keep you updated.”

  He nodded then walked off.

  I stood and watched him go, surprised that I didn’t even get a goodbye. As if he had somewhere else to be, he just rushed off. I turned the other way and began the walk to the Trinity Building.

  “Sicily?” His deep voice came from behind me.

  I turned back around and saw him jogging toward me.

  He stopped in front of me and looked down at me because he was still taller even when I wore heels. “Sorry, I’m not trying to be a dick. I’ve just got a lot on my mind right now. I haven’t felt this…unencumbered in a long time. I appreciate all the work you’re doing.”

  The smile spread over my lips, seeing a glimpse of the man I’d met months ago. “I understand, Dex. This is a high-stress position, and I know it’s going to be difficult to get back into the swing of things.”

  “Difficult isn’t the right word. Try impossible.”

  At the end of the day, I walked to the Trinity Building and approached the residence door. After a knock, I was welcomed inside by Cleo with a warm hug while her husband cooked dinner in the kitchen. “How’d it go? Tim told me Dex took the office.”

  “It went pretty well. I’d say it was a successful day.”

  “That’s great.” She smiled then guided me to the dining table. “I want to hear all about it.” We sat down, and she poured two glasses of wine while Deacon set the dining table and placed dinner in front of us.

  I looked at the delicious meal in front of me, chicken marsala with pasta and a side of green beans along with a salad. “Oh, you don’t have to cook for me every time I come over—”

  “It’s the least I can do as a thank-you for putting up with my son.” Deacon gave a slight smile before he pulled out the chair across from me and sat down, wearing a gray t-shirt and black sweatpants.

  “I don’t feel like I’m putting up with him.” There was some resistance and some coldness, but he made up for that.

  Deacon cut into his food with his eyes down. “Yet.”

  Cleo had her laptop and paperwork to the side, but she didn’t open it over dinner. “Tim told me you didn’t look at the apartments I had lined up for Dex?”

  “Dex says he wants to stay at his place.”

  “Well, that’s too bad,” she said simply. “Because we got him a place. When we have the keys, I’ll hand them over to you, and you’ll get together with a designer and start furnishing the space.”

  I stared at her in shock for a few seconds. “Uh, I think that might upset Dex.”

  “Oh, I’m sure it will. He’ll get over it.” She cut into her food and took a bite. “He’s a very proud man, but once his life is back on track and everything is going smoothly, he can buy the place from us. I’d rather get it set up, so when he’s ready, the transition is easy.”

  I grabbed my fork and started to eat, and after I took the first bite, I was glad she’d asked me to come over. If I’d gone to my apartment, I probably would have ordered takeout or something.

  Deacon spoke after he drank his wine. “Dex is very resistant to help because we paid his tuition until graduation, so he doesn’t want to take a penny from us. But we need to get him back on his feet, and once he’s there, he can pay us back if it’s that important to him. I wouldn’t take that away from him.”

  “Yes,” Cleo said in agreement. “I don’t want you to think we’re the kind of parents that control the lives of our children, but with Dex, he really needs the help to get reestablished. He’s been through a lot, and we just want him to do what he’s meant to do. The financial part of it is unimportant. We can deal with that later.”

  My curiosity got the best of me, so I voiced it. “I know it’s none of my business and I’m not trying to pry, but Dex was a world-renowned heart surgeon for many years. Why does he need financial help to do all this?” I had no idea what the salary was for someone of his caliber, but it had to be several million dollars on an annual basis. He should be able to buy that office on his own, and also his new apartment. Did he have a gambling problem or something? He didn’t seem like someone who would.

  Deacon continued to chew his food as he lifted his head and made eye contact with his wife.

  She stared at him for a while as she considered my question, an unspoken conversation happening between them.

  I shouldn’t have pried. “It’s none of my business. I shouldn’t have asked.” If I was going to run his life, I wanted to know everything about him and give him the greatest chance of success.

  Cleo turned back to me. “No, it’s fine. I would not normally share this information with someone, but I think it’s relevant to what you’re trying to do.” She paused again as she considered how she would word her explanation. Her eyes dropped as she absentmindedly reached for her glass of wine. “Dex had a really messy divorce. He didn’t sign a prenup, and since it’s a community property state, he basically lost everything.” She brought the glass to her lips and took a drink like she needed the alcohol immediately, not just to calm her nerves but to clear away the bile that rushed into her mouth.

  I was shocked, and I was certain that it showed on my face. All I could do was stare at her as I thought of Dex in a whole new light. His strange comment at the gala months ago completely made sense now. That meant he’d only been divorced for a year…no wonder why he said he was fucked up. “Oh…I’m so sorry to hear that.” I had no idea what happened in their relationship, but I immediately put the blame on her. I couldn’t imagine Dex being unfaithful or dishonest, so she was the idiot who let a good man go—and took everything he’d worked so hard for.

  “Don’t mention it to him.” Deacon continued to eat. “He doesn’t like to talk about it—ever.”

  “I wouldn’t.” If he wanted me to know about it, he would have mentioned it by now, especially when I told him about my affair with a married man. That was his opening, but he didn’t take it. “I arranged for him to return to his position at Kline Clinic, and I contacted Columbia, and the second I dropped his name, they offered to give him a position there. I also contacted Doctors Without Borders to get him on a quarterly rotation.”

  The look Cleo gave suggested she was impressed. “That’s great. What did he say?”

  “Said he needed to think about it.”

  “That’s better than a flat no,” Deacon said in between bites.

  “I think letting him start with those things is a great idea,” Cleo said. “Getting him in the operating room…that might take a while.”

  “Mr. Torres doesn’t have a while,” Deacon said quietly. “The guy only has a few months—at the most.”

  Now I felt like I had the weight of this man’s life in my hands. I had to get Dex ready for this undertaking, had to encourage him to overcome his fears, and had to do it within a short time frame. “I’ll get him there…somehow.”

  20

  Dex

  When I submitted my two weeks to the lab, they immediately replaced me with somebody else, so I was out of a job for a while. I spent the week kicking back in my apartment and watching TV. I hit the gym more religiously than I used to, even though I was already so fit that a couple extra hours here and there wouldn’t make much of a difference.

  I put off my exam as long as I could, but I knew I couldn’t drag it out.

  I applie
d to take it but didn’t bother to study.

  Psh, I didn’t need to study.

  Everything was fresh in my mind like I’d never stopped practicing. Like my father said, being a doctor wasn’t something that you did; it was who you are. Even when I was working on the concierge team, I would read research articles in my field because I was still curious about advancements. I followed up on my colleagues, always interested to see how they were doing.

  I hadn’t heard from Sicily. I imagined she was hustling to get that office ready in record time, and she didn’t text me to ask which positions I would take. It’d already been two weeks, and if I waited any longer, the offers might vanish.

  I had to decide.

  “Take the research position.” Daisy sat across from me in her black dress and heels, her thick hair flowing across her shoulders with a distinct shine. She had thick eyelashes coated in dark mascara, making her look more like a makeup artist at Sephora than a physician. “That’s where your interest has always been. And take the teaching position too. You’re just like Derek, having this knack for explaining things to people.” She grabbed her beer and took a drink.

  I shook my head. “Not the teaching position.”

  “Why?” Derek was beside me, his elbows on the table in a long-sleeved shirt, his black wedding ring on his left hand. He turned his head and looked at me, giving me that same intense expression he’d inherited from Dad.

  I shook my head. “I don’t think I have any right to instruct others.”