We Woof You a Deadly Christmas

by Laura Quinn

  “That made me think maybe it was its value as a vessel, rather than an antique, that was important,” Bob said.

  Claire looked at the photo again. “It looks too small for documents, but the perfect size for a tape recording or flash drive.”

  “That would fit with your blackmail theory,” Bob agreed.

  “I’m going to run over to see if I can find it, but I think it was broken. Can you check with the coroner to see if any brown ceramic shards were found in Donald’s body?” Claire asked. “I’m also going to ask Tallulah point-blank about this alleged payment to Don Jr.” They promised to call each other as soon as they had answers.

  When Zac arrived, Claire ran next door to help Lula search for the owl. Before they started, Claire sat down with her at the evaluation desk.

  “I’m going to ask you this straight, did you offer Donald money to leave your sister?” Claire asked.

  “Why would I do that? I hated the jerk, sure, but Lila loved him.”

  “I’m trying to put pieces together. His son insists you knew about the fake marriage and that you paid him to leave before Lila learned the truth.”

  “I was as shocked as you were when that barbarian showed up that night. How could I know he was Donald’s son?”

  “You’re sure?” Claire asked. “I’m not judging; I have to know the truth if you want me to help your sister.”

  “Cross my heart,” Lula said, tracing the letter x on her chest.

  “I didn’t think you did, but I had to ask.”

  “Oh, sugar,” Lula reached over and hugged Claire. “Now, what exactly do we need to look for?”

  They began at the register, where Claire retrieved the broken piece of pottery, still in the envelope she put it in for protection. “I’m going to give this to Officer Conner; I think it’s part of the broken owl.”

  “Why is that important? Isn’t it just another tacky entry?” Lula asked.

  “This might be completely off-base, but I think it’s why Donald was killed.” Claire proceeded to explain her theory of Ruth’s blackmail scheme, likely discovered by Donald when he examined the piece.

  “That sounds like Donald,” Lula said. “How can I help?”

  “We need to look for the owl, if it still exists, or some type of computer disk or flash drive. Where is Donald’s computer?”

  Lula laughed. “He never used one, thought they were more trouble than they were worth. All the business’s records are hand-written, if Lila did them, or typewritten, the few times he did them.” She took Claire into the office to show her the beige IBM Selectric.

  Claire grinned. “This is like a recording of everything he typed, for the last several days at least. There could be valuable evidence on it,” Claire said as she opened the lid and retrieved the cartridge. “Mom used to have one and I played on it when I was a kid.”

  Claire slid the cartridge into her purse to examine later. Of course, she would turn it in to the police, but she told herself it couldn’t hurt to look through it first.

  They proceeded to the safe, which Lula was able to open with the combination from her sister’s notes. Black powder on the inside was evidence that the police had already searched it. Only a few insignificant certificates lay inside, alongside a red velvet box. Claire opened it to find a gold pocket watch, engraved with Donald’s and Delilah’s wedding date and a miniature photo of the couple inside.

  “Funny he would have kept that,” Tallulah said. “He was hardly the sentimental type.”

  “No, he wasn’t,” Claire said, her face brightening. “Do you think Delilah would mind if I tried to open this?”

  Tallulah answered the question by smashing it with a brass paperweight. Among the bits of broken glass, springs and cogs, was an antique key. “This will unlock what Donald really treasured, now we just need to find what it opens.”

  They looked around the office for some type of secret safe. By the size of the key, Claire guessed it was a small box. Tallulah looked through the desk while Claire searched the bookshelves behind it.

  “What if we tapped on the walls and floor? There might be a secret compartment,” Tallulah suggested.

  “You’re a genius,” Claire said and began knocking on the floorboards.

  “I learned it from Scooby Doo. My kids loved that show.”

  “I knew I liked you,” Claire said. They thumped their way around the office without success. Lula left to continue the exploration in the storeroom and Claire was about to follow her, when she looked closely at the desk.

  “Wait a minute,” Claire called. “I think I’ve seen this type of desk on Antique Roadshow. If I’m right, there are secret compartments hidden inside.”

  The pair pulled out drawers, which led to more drawers and false bottoms. Claire reached back through the nearly empty desk and found a lever that revealed a locked box. Her hand trembled slightly as she fit the iron key into the keyhole and turned until she heard the ancient mechanism click. Inside lay a very modern device.

  “What is that?”

  “I believe this is Ruth Fischer’s external hard drive, which should house all her secrets.”

  “Should we call the police?”

  “If we do, they’ll ask how we found this, and…”

  “And we’ll be arrested,” Lula guessed.

  “Since the police already checked the safe, it stands to reason that they weren’t interested in this evidence,” Claire rationalized. “If it takes us a little while to figure out exactly what it is first, then we can hardly be blamed, especially if it helps catch the real killer.”

  “Darn tootin’. How do we fire up this baby?”

  “I’ll try it on my computer. Do you want to come next door with me?”

  The grandfather clock in the corner chimed. “Is that the time? Oh heck, I better get home to sis. You’ll let me know what you find, won’t you?”

  Claire agreed and ran back to find the evidence she’d been waiting to find. She was excited to find an unprotected spreadsheet, but it was a table of codes that appeared to be nothing more than gibberish. She tried opening the other files, but they were zipped and password-protected.

  “Dang it, why do people have to be so paranoid?” Claire said aloud, realizing she would need Keckers’ help. While Emma and Harry were on break, she showed the drive to Zac who also failed to open the files.

  “This is a pretty serious encryption program. Keckers can probably crack it, but it will take a while. His parents’ yacht has terrible Wi-Fi service, since they want him to have a tech-free vacation,” Zac said. “You can try sending it, though.”

  “Thanks,” Claire said, then remembered the police warning. “We never had this conversation, though.”

  Zac winked his understanding and worked on restocking the empty spots on the shelves during the lull. Claire baked several batches of treats while she thought about how to decode the list. Baron nudged her to remind her it was time to go home; she had hardly noticed when the teens closed the shop, nearly three hours earlier.

  At home, Claire ate a cup of yogurt while the cats feasted on their late dinner. Although Baron ate at the shop, he scored a portion of their double-serving-size can of chicken pot pie. When he finished licking the plate, he yawned and stretched.

  “I’m tired too; let’s call it a night.” Claire cleaned up the plates and programmed the coffee maker for an early brew. Baron ran up the stairs with Claire trailing behind. She was almost to the staircase, when she stepped on something. “You cats!” she shouted, seeing the something was the contents of her purse, strewn across the floor. They looked at her without a trace of regret.

  “It’s my fault, I know,” she capitulated. “I shouldn’t have left it on the counter; you can’t resist the fringe tassel.” She picked up her keys, lip balm, wallet, and miscellany, and then groaned. Looped around the breakfast bar stools like a cat’s cradle was a shiny black ribbon, connected by the stretched, orange ends to the plastic cartridge.

  “If I get ar
rested for tampering with evidence, you only have yourselves to blame.” Hercule sat licking his paws, Penny walked away, bored.

  Claire brought the mess upstairs to bed and began the delicate process of twisting the orange knob to rewind the ribbon into the cartridge. Baron looked at the ribbon snake strangely, sniffed it, then jumped down to his bed. Although she was tired, Claire couldn’t resist reading the typed imprints on the loops. Several addresses and invoice amounts meant Claire would have to take her time to look through carefully in the morning. Now, it was time for bed. She carefully gathered the mass of ribbon, but dropped it when she saw a telling segment.

  “Oh no,” she gasped.

  Chapter 19

  Tuesday, December 19th

  The coiled ribbon on her bedside table proved the discovery hadn’t been a nightmare. She picked up and re-read the ribbon’s imprinted text. “$10,000 Received from Tallulah Banks December 11th, as partial payment of contracted services. Balance due of $40,000, payable upon conclusion of the agreement.”

  Hoping she was wrong, Claire checked the local weather database for that date. She took a screenshot of the precipitation details, then wrote down other curious entries from the cartridge. The last recording was a typed receipt for the transport of a Diceros bicornis, certified as an artistic rendering by Prescott and Co Fine Antiques, from South Africa to a man in Minneapolis. Claire googled the scientific name to learn it was a black rhino, on the endangered list.

  “I’ll be this is what Don Jr. was smuggling in,” Claire said as she dialed Marti. “This is just what Officer Conners needs.”

  “A new precinct?” her friend answered.

  Claire filled in the details of what she found and her plan to call Lula to confront her with the evidence. Marti wished her luck before two hungry cats jumped up demanding breakfast. Pet duties fulfilled, she texted Barbara to say she would be in a bit late, then dialed Lula’s phone number.

  Delilah’s sister answered in a cheerful drawl. “Hi honey, did you find something to catch the real killer?”

  “You tell me,” Claire began. “I found something on that cartridge and frankly, I don’t know what to believe. You swore you didn’t know that Donald was married to someone else.”

  “I didn’t.”

  Claire read the transcript verbatim. At first, Lula tried to deny it. Then, after a few moments of silence, she broke down.

  “I can’t believe that weasel typed up our deal,” she said, then confessed to hiring a private detective to dig up information on her brother-in-law. “After investing nearly a half-million dollars to start the business, Lila was spending tens of thousands of dollars per month to keep it afloat. I smelled a rat, though I had no idea how stinky it was. The P.I. found all sorts of damning information, including a wife and son. I figured it was the silver bullet to get rid of Donald once and for all.”

  “Lula, this proves Don Jr.’s story, validating motive for your sister to kill Donald,” Claire said. “And, it’s dated the day he was killed.”

  “That doesn’t prove anything. First, Lila didn’t know; I kept it all from her. Second, he might have typed that note at any time after we talked.”

  Claire pulled up the weather record and read it to Lula. “Hail is a rare occurrence here, but it happened last weekend. Your car is hail-damaged, meaning you were in town the day he was killed, not the next day as you claimed.”

  The tough lady took a defiant breath, then crumpled. “It’s true; I flew in on the tenth to meet with the P.I. to get the proof. I met Donald and made the offer sometime after midnight; leave it to him to be so precise on the time.”

  “And I presume you withdrew the ten thousand dollars from your bank, leaving indisputable proof.”

  “I hardly knew he was going to get himself killed, did I?” Lula took a deep breath. “I knew he would agree with a little incentive. He said he would leave as soon as he received a response from some potentially profitable inquiries. I figured it would be just as well for Delilah to enjoy the holidays before finding out her husband left her.”

  “Did Donald say who he contacted? Those are probably Ruth’s blackmail victims, and one of them is quite possibly the murderer.”

  “No, he made it sound as it was a big business deal. To tell you the truth, I didn’t want to know.” She paused before continuing, “I’m sorry I lied to you. It wasn’t just to save myself, you see, but it would implicate Lila.”

  “I understand, but it would have been helpful to know the truth from the start. I’m going to focus on finding blackmail victims and hope that may be enough to save both your skins.”

  Claire called Marti with the updates on the way to the shop, which was already busy with customers. She whispered an apology to Barbara for being late and got to work; the investigation would have to wait.

  Peggy arrived at noon and began helping customers. During a break, she explained to Claire that she couldn’t stand being at home any longer. “I figured I may as well come back to work. My mother is always so negative; she drives me crazy. Life is too short; you’ve got to enjoy it while you’ve got it.”

  Claire couldn’t help but smile at the irony as she welcomed her brave employee back to work. Peggy enjoyed the limelight as she reenacted the scene on the firetruck for regular and new customers. The trio was kept busy, as frantic crowds shopped for last-minute gifts. When the postman reminded the shop owner that the deadline for express mail service was the next day, an hour of shopping frenzy followed. Word seemed to spread, as the online orders were coming in faster too.

  Kirstin Patel came in with Georgie, who posed for photos in his red satin jacket, bedazzled in black crystals that spelled “Naughty, but Nice” on the back.

  “I’m so glad you encouraged us to come to the gala,” Kirstin said when she got through to the counter. “I never realized Georgie would like to associate with other dogs, but he loved it. Sorry it’s taken so long to get back here.”

  “You look radiant,” Claire said, noticing the fresh tan beneath the white parka.

  “We just got back from Aspen, before it got crazy. JayJay loves to ski, so I spent a week learning on the bunny hills.”

  “That’s commendable,” Claire said as she began wrapping up the baskets of items for the miniature Yorkie.

  “Just between us, the instructors are gorg. I mean snow-melting hot. Plus, we get to cruise the South Pacific for the holidays as compensation. We’re leaving tomorrow, so I’ve got to get all of Georgie’s things finalized and packed.”

  “I hope you’re not planning to be anywhere near Palmyra Island. It’s haunted,” Peggy said. “Seriously, the curse has killed several people.”

  Kirstin’s eyes widened and she pulled up her itinerary and a map. “No, it doesn’t look like we’ll be near there. We’re starting in Singapore and ending in Auckland.”

  “That sounds lovely,” Claire said, directing Peggy to take a break. “Traci showed me the most stunning photos of her honeymoon in Bali.”

  Kirstin sighed. “We’ve been traveling so much lately, I wish we could just stay home and enjoy an old-fashioned Christmas. Can you believe I’m saying that? This married life is making me feel domestic.”

  Claire was about to total the order, but Kirstin decided she needed a few more things. While she debated between a black-sequin tuxedo and a white-satin dinner jacket with rhinestone snowflakes, Kirstin took the opportunity to ask about the cider server from the gala.

  “Even though that guy was hot, he doesn’t have a chance,” she said. “JayJay claimed he was making eyes at you all night, but I told him he’s no Nick. There’s true love there, I can tell.”

  Claire bit her tongue. She should be used to the constant public interest in her love life, but it still stung. Baron jumped up on the counter and sniffed the white jacket.

  “That settles it, I’ll respect Baron’s taste and take that one. Then, I’ve got to go. We’re already late for our mani-pedi’s, aren’t we Georgie Porgie?”

  Claire
added the final items to the bill and wished the pair bon voyage. A few hours later, Emma and Jesi began their shifts. Before Peggy left, Claire took Baron on a long walk and stopped to pick up her order of sandwiches, snacks and drinks at the back of Carrie’s shop. The barista took the opportunity to smoke a clove cigarette.

  “I’m seriously thinking of just offering black coffee or plain tea until after the holidays. It’s been nonstop gingerbread lattes, Meli Kalikimaka frappes, peppermint twist teas and holiday chai au lait all day,” Carrie said. “I’m grateful for the business, but it’s getting exhausting. The more people shop, the more caffeine they need.”

  “And they’re shopping up a storm,” Claire said. “Our new postman spread panic this afternoon with his helpful tip about last-minute shipping deadlines. Even when I close tonight, I’ll be filling online orders until the wee hours.”

  “At least you were smart enough to close for two weeks after the madness. I don’t know why I didn’t; it’s dead until mid-January.”

  Claire shivered and glanced at the back of the antique store.

  “Sorry, I shouldn’t have used that word,” Carrie said, taking one last puff before grinding the glowing remnants in a large pot. “We’ve had enough of that, though I daresay at least part of our huge increase this year is due to the morbidly curious.”

  Baron spotted Emma by the dumpster and barked, cueing Claire to get back to work. She held the lid open as Emma swung in a bag filled with urine-soaked paper towels.

  “Mrs. Potters just left. I swear her dogs fill their bladders for their visits here,” the teen said. “And she never offers to help clean up the huge puddles.”

  Claire thanked her and handed her the cup marked with an E. “Why don’t you take a break and recover? I’ve got your hot cider here and some slices of pumpkin-ginger bread. When you’re done, Jesi can take her break.”

  As soon as both girls were back to work, Claire returned to the kitchen with Baron. With Peggy gone, she pulled out her murder board so she could concentrate on motives and suspects while she baked. Then, she unwrapped a sandwich for herself and prepared dinner for Baron. While they ate, she planned her baking strategy. If all went well, they could still be home before midnight. “Midnight Madness, I almost forgot,” Claire said aloud. She gathered the catering order for the solstice party and dashed out the door with Baron.