He chuckled then lowered his head to place a kiss on her forehead. With one hand holding the baby securely to her breasts, she reached up with her free hand to touch the side of his face.
“Thank you, Chandler, for...being here with me. For—” Tears choked her throat and she struggled to swallow away the aching lump. “For caring about me...and the baby.”
His blue eyes gentle, he stroked a tangled strand of hair back from her face. “You don’t have to thank me, Ros. This is where I wanted to be. We just didn’t know this was going to happen on our date night, did we?”
“No. It’s a date I’ll never forget.” For plenty of reasons, she thought. Even before the baby had decided to suddenly make her appearance into the world, Roslyn had felt Chandler drawing closer to her. Now, going through five hours of exhausting labor with him holding her hand, wiping her brow and giving her soft words of encouragement, she knew for certain that she felt more than close to him. She loved him. Plain and simple.
But where was that love going to land her? Smack in the middle of a heartache?
No. She wasn’t going to try to answer that now. At this moment she was the happiest woman alive. Her child was safely born and snuggled in her arms. And whether Chandler would ever love her or not, he cared enough to be at her side at the most important time in her life. For now, she couldn’t ask for more.
* * *
Before the night was over, Chandler ended up grabbing a couple of hours of sleep on a couch in the waiting room. When he woke up just before daylight, he quickly slapped water on his face and hurried to the gift shop on the bottom floor of the hospital. After purchasing the biggest bouquet of flowers he could find, he took the elevator up to Roslyn’s private room, which was located in the maternity ward of the hospital.
At the door he knocked lightly, then stepped inside to see Roslyn sitting up in bed with the baby in her arms. And from the way she’d positioned the thin blanket, he had to assume she was breast-feeding her new daughter.
“Hello,” he said. “Is it okay if I come in?”
She’d brushed her light brown hair and pulled it into a ponytail, and a bit of color had been dabbed on her lips. After the hard labor she’d gone through, he didn’t know where she’d found the energy to do either. But this morning she looked amazingly beautiful and refreshed.
“It’s very okay. Are those for me?” she asked, her gaze going to the vase of flowers he was carrying.
“They are. Congratulations, new mother.” He deposited the vase in an out-of-the-way spot on the nightstand.
“Thank you,” she said. “I’ve never seen daisies and roses mixed together. They’re very beautiful.”
“So are you.” He lifted off his hat, then dropped a kiss on top of Roslyn’s head. “How are you feeling?”
Her smile was like a beam of sunshine and Chandler realized that seeing her happy made his spirits soar.
“After all the pain and pushing and straining, I should feel awful, I suppose. But I actually feel wonderful. I want to sing and shout.”
“And so you should,” Chandler said gently. “You’ve been blessed with a beautiful daughter. How does that feel?”
She glanced down at the baby and Chandler couldn’t miss the love and pride swimming in her eyes.
“I never thought it would be like this, Chandler. I didn’t know I could love this much, or feel so fiercely protective.” Her eyes glistened as they met his. “But to be honest, I’m a little scared, too. I’m responsible for someone other than myself now.”
He reached over and squeezed her shoulder. “You’re going to be everything this little girl needs.”
Now that the baby was actually here, Chandler’s protective feelings for Roslyn and her child had grown to enormous proportions. And in spite of being exhausted, he’d had trouble staying asleep for more than fifteen minutes at a time. And the problem hadn’t been the hard couch or the freezing temperature of the waiting room. No, his mind had been whirling with thoughts of Roslyn, the baby and how much he wanted them to remain in his life.
At this moment, with her soft brown eyes delving into his, the idea of telling her exactly how he felt was pushing and prodding at him. Yet he held back. Too much had happened in the past twenty-four hours and far more needed to happen before they could talk about a future together.
Clearing his throat, he rolled up the brim of his hat with both hands and squeezed the expensive felt. “Have you decided on a name yet?”
“I have. That is, if you agree to it.”
Confused, he shook his head. “Me? What I think shouldn’t matter.”
She reached beneath the blanket and straightened her clothing, then slipped it away from the newborn’s face. Chandler’s heart instantly squeezed with love as he stared at the baby. What little hair she possessed had dried to the same light brown color as her mother’s. Most of the redness had left her face and now that her features were relaxed in sleep, he decided she resembled Roslyn.
“But it does,” she said. “I’d like to name her Evelyn Kay.”
His gaze flew up to meet Roslyn’s. “Evelyn is mother’s first name. You want to name her after Mom?”
Nodding, she said, “I hope she or none of the family will mind.”
He suddenly smiled. “Mind? Mom will be thrilled. If you haven’t already guessed, she loves you like a daughter. But how did you know that was her name? She’s always gone by Maureen.”
“I was in the kitchen one day helping Reeva and we were discussing names. She told me. Kay was my mother’s middle name. So she’s going to be named after two special women.”
“Well, I think Evelyn Kay is perfect.” It would be even more perfect if the name was followed by Hollister, but that was a different matter. One that would require a commitment he wasn’t sure either of them was ready to make.
He made a point of glancing at his watch. “I better go. The girls have already opened the clinic. I need to get over there,” he told her.
Nodding that she understood, she smiled. “You can announce Evelyn’s arrival to everyone. And in case you don’t remember the nurse telling us in the delivery room, she weighed six pounds and ten ounces and she’s nineteen inches long.”
“And she’s very beautiful, like her mother,” he added with a playful wink. “I’ll be sure and spread the word.”
He started to leave, but before he could turn away from the bed, she quickly caught him by the hand.
Arching a brow at her, he asked, “Was there something you needed before I go?”
“No. I, uh, I just wanted to tell you that...well, that you made Evelyn’s birth very special for me. I’ll never forget that, Chandler.”
Was this the beginning of a goodbye? No. Somehow, someway, he couldn’t let that happen.
Bending, he placed a kiss on her lips.”
* * *
More than two weeks later, Chandler knocked on the door of his mother’s office and without waiting for an answer, stepped inside.
She was sitting at the desk with the landline phone jammed to her ear. As soon as she spotted Chandler, she motioned for him to stay and he took a seat, while she finished the phone conversation.
“I know. Yes. I’m doing the best that I can,” she said. “It’s not something—”
She paused and Chandler noticed a mixture of sadness and frustration on her face.
“Okay. I’m going to try not to ponder on it too much. No. Don’t do that. I’ll call you. Tomorrow evening.” She hung up the receiver back on its hook. “Sorry about that, son. Were you wanting to talk with me?”
He couldn’t tamp down his curiosity. It was nearing midnight. Who could she be talking to at this hour? “Was that Vivian or Camille?”
Instead of looking at him, she studied the ink blotter on the desktop. “No. Just someone I’m thinking of doing cattle business with. Nothing important.�
�
She glanced up, and though Chandler hated to think it, she wasn’t being truthful. Which made no sense at all. His mother wasn’t a person who lied about anything. Unless she believed the lie would save someone a heartache.
Deciding not to press her on the issue for now, Chandler said, “I see. Someone on West Coast time. Well, do you have a minute to talk?”
“Always,” she said. “Is anything wrong?”
Chandler didn’t waste time coming to the point. “Yes. Something is very wrong. I just left Roslyn’s room and she tells me she’s rented an apartment in town. She’s going to be moving in by midweek.”
Maureen leaned back and folded her hands together in her lap. “I already know about that.”
“Surely you don’t approve! She needs to stay here on the ranch, where Reeva and Jazelle and Kat can all help her with the baby.”
“And you told her all of this?” Maureen asked.
“I told her that and a lot more. She has no earthly reason to get an apartment. Not when she’s more than welcome to stay right here.”
“I’ve already made that argument with her, Chandler. I’m afraid she has her mind made up. And to tell you the truth, now that I’ve had time to think on it, I believe she’s doing the right thing for herself and the baby.”
Chandler jumped straight up and began to pace around the shadowy room. “How could you say that, Mom? I can see how close you’ve already grown to baby Evelyn. And I know how you feel about Roslyn. You can’t want them to leave!” he argued.
She frowned. “I didn’t say anything about wanting them to leave. I said it was probably the best thing for them.”
“Hell, what’s the difference? Either way, they’ll be out of the house,” he muttered.
“And that bothers you.”
Maureen hadn’t bothered to put her words into question form. She already knew how he felt.
Shaking his head, he crossed the room and sank into the chair he’d vacated moments ago. “Damn right it bothers me. She doesn’t need to be alone.”
“Lots of single mothers care for their babies alone. And Roslyn isn’t a helpless person. In fact, I’m very proud of her. She’s taken to motherhood like a real pro. Like she’s already had three or four babies before this one. I have no doubt the two of them will be fine on their own. And even if she does need some help, all she has to do is pick up the phone and one of us will be there for her. It’s not like she’s moving to another state.”
But this is the first step to making that big move, Chandler thought. The very one he didn’t want her to make.
“I don’t like it.”
Maureen’s smile was placating. “No. I don’t expect that you do. All of us can see that you’ve—grown very fond of Roslyn. It’s understandable that you want to keep her here—close to you.”
He darted a sheepish look at her. “Are my feelings for Roslyn that transparent?”
Her smile deepened. “They aren’t on your sleeve yet, but they’re pretty darn close.”
Chandler groaned. These past couple of weeks since she’d come home with the baby he’d purposely made time away from the clinic to be with her and Evelyn. With each day that had passed, he’d fallen more and more in love with them.
“I might as well admit it, Mom. I’m crazy about her and Evelyn. But I don’t know what to do about it.”
She shook her head. “A good start would be telling her how you feel. Have you done that?”
He pushed fingers into his hair and raked them backward. “Not exactly. I wanted to give her time—to adjust to being a mother. And to being away from her father and home in Fort Worth. Besides, I’m not keen on being rejected.”
Maureen’s chuckle was full of disbelief. “I can’t see that happening. Roslyn thinks you’re the grandest thing since the discovery of fire. But I do think she has her doubts about you.”
Stunned, Chandler stared at his mother. “What are you talking about? I’ve always tried to be a responsible man.”
“Depends on how you define responsible.” She stacked several papers together, then slipped them into the bottom drawer of the desk. “Yes, you’re accountable to your family, the ranch and your work. But what about Roslyn and baby Evelyn?”
He groaned. “Hell, Mom? I’m giving them all the time I can.”
“Right now, you are. But Roslyn doesn’t know if that will last. She’s already had one man upend her life. Understandably, she’s going to be cautious. You need to respect her wishes to be on her own and give her time to figure everything out for herself.”
Chandler was about to retort that there was no need for Roslyn to be independent. That he’d be only too happy to take care of her. But it suddenly dawned on him that he was being an idiot. Roslyn had just run away from a controlling man. He didn’t want to give her reason to run again.
“You’re right, Mom. But I worry...”
Maureen walked around the desk to stand in front of him.
“You worry about what?” she urged.
Frustration put a curse word on his tongue, but he bit it back. “This deal with her father. Roslyn still hasn’t talked to him. You’d think she’d at least want to tell him that the baby had arrived safely and he was now the grandfather to a daughter. But she’s stubborn about it.”
Surprised, Maureen asked, “You brought all of that up with Roslyn?”
Chandler blew out a weary breath. “Once. Not that it did any good. She quickly shut me down.”
Maureen laid a hand on his shoulder. “Chandler, not everyone’s dad is as loving and supportive as the one you had. Remember that and try to respect Roslyn’s wishes.”
He shook his head. “Mom, you always taught us kids that bitterness was the same as poison. To carry it around made a person sick. Don’t you still believe that?”
She slowly eased into the chair next to his and rubbed her eyes with both hands. The disenchanted gesture made Chandler want to put his arm around her shoulders and remind her that he and the rest of her children hadn’t forgotten the loss she’d endured.
“Dear Lord, Chandler, sometimes it amazes me how much like Joel you are.” She dropped her hands and gave him a battle-weary smile. “Ever since your dad died I’ve tried very hard not to be bitter. But sometimes when I forget to hold my guard up, the resentful feelings creep up on me. When that happens I’m not good and...well, perhaps you’re right about Roslyn. Maybe it would be best if she confronted her father and cleared the air. I can’t say. But I am sure of one thing. You’ll regret it if you let her get away.”
On that count, Chandler couldn’t argue with his mother. Roslyn and baby Evelyn had become everything to him. And somehow, someway, he had to convince her that she needed him in her life as much as he needed the two of them.
Chapter Eleven
Leaving Three Rivers had been the hardest thing Roslyn had ever done in her entire life. When she’d driven away with Evelyn and all their personal belongings, she’d felt as though a part of her heart was being torn away. The Hollisters had become her family and Chandler... Just thinking about him put a lump of emotion in her throat and filled her heart with a longing that refused to go away.
Now, after more than two weeks of being gone from the ranch and living in her own apartment, she was still questioning her decision to leave a place where she and the baby had been totally surrounded by people who cared about her.
But from the very beginning, Roslyn had made an agreement with Maureen that she would only stay until she’d had the baby and was recuperated enough to move on. That time had come and she’d been determined not to stay longer and take advantage of the generous family, even though Chandler had put up an argument for her to stay.
But it hadn’t been the kind of argument Roslyn had hoped or wished to hear from him. He’d never once mentioned the word love. He’d never once told her that he didn’
t want to live without her and Evelyn. That’s all it would’ve taken to keep her there on the ranch with him. But he’d never spoken anything that could have been construed as a vow of love. He’d not hinted anything about wanting to make a future with her. Instead, he’d kept harping on the fact that she needed to stay on the ranch, where she’d have plenty of help with the baby.
Sighing, she glanced down at Evelyn to see she’d finished nursing and had fallen asleep. Roslyn eased her nipple away from the baby’s slack mouth and readjusted her clothing before she rose from the wooden rocker and placed her in a white bassinet.
At the rate her daughter was growing, it wouldn’t be long before the bassinet would be too small to accommodate her. But for now, Roslyn preferred to have the baby sleeping in the same bedroom with her, instead of across the hall in the nursery.
The apartment Roslyn had rented was in an older building complex located fairly close to the school where Katherine worked as a secretary. From a window at the back of her living room, she could see a portion of a small city park equipped with gym sets and bumpy slides. At the front of the ground-floor apartment, there was a cluster of Joshua trees and a small flower bed filled with native rocks and a variety of succulents.
It was a pretty place in a quiet neighborhood and Roslyn liked the way the rooms were coming together. Since she’d moved in, she’d been gradually collecting pieces of furniture and rugs and wall decorations to make the place feel more like home. And the nursery was turning out to be bright and cheery with all white furniture and bright yellow curtains.
Yes, she and Evelyn were in their own little home now, she thought, as she walked out to the living room. This was what she’d planned from the very beginning. And no, Wickenburg was still a far distance from Redding. But that would come later.
How much later, Roslyn? When Evelyn gets to be three or four months old? Or will it take a year for you to find the courage to move on from the Hollisters—mainly one Hollister? The gentle veterinarian with black hair and sky-blue eyes and a smile that melts your bones. You need to forget Chandler. Sure, he likes your company. But he’s never going to be serious. He’s never going to love you.
His Texas Runaway (Men 0f The West Book 41) Page 15