Hazed

by Brittany Butler

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  I do a final mirror check. I opted for less makeup tonight, strictly powder and mascara. I pinch my cheeks, making natural color flow to them. Knowing Hayze, my face will be red all night, I think he enjoys embarrassing me. My beige sweater is tight and low cut, without being immodest. I chose a pair of maroon skinnies and brown combat boots. Now that I’m checking every angle in the mirror, I’m having second doubts. I wanted to be myself, not over the top, but maybe I should try for another outfit. It’s basically our first date.

  My nerves get the best of me and I chew anxiously on my bottom lip. He hasn’t told me where he’s taking me and that worries me a little. I don’t have enough time to panic, a knock on the door draws me out. I stand, smooth my clothes and my unruly hair and answer it. Hayze stands in front of me, simply dressed in jeans and a tee. His black leather jacket covers his tattoos, there’s something about the combination of his classic car and leather jacket that makes me want to call off the date and pull him in my bed. But I shake that image from my head. I breathe a sigh of relief that he’s not dressed up, but now that I think of it, when has he ever been?

  “Ready?” He asks, kissing my cheek.

  “You tell me. I don’t even know where we’re going,” I say, gesturing to my outfit.

  “You look fine, Babe.” I close my door, locking it behind me. “More than fine,” he whispers, coming up to my backside. With a stroke of his hand, he sweeps my hair back and places a kiss behind my ear.

  “Stop it,” I giggle and slap him away. Or we won’t make it out.

  When we get to the restaurant my stomach is in knots. It’s the same place Corey took me on that…unforgettable date. The smell of Italian knocks into my senses when I open the car door. People spill from the front doors, waiting for their names to be called.

  “We have a reservation,” Hayze tells me, seeing my reluctance. I smile at him, thankful; I’m surprised that he thought ahead. When we get to the lobby, I freeze. Chandler and Kassi are seated on a bench. There’s no way to avoid them. They were really nice, but I haven’t talked to any of the group since the night at the cabin. Kassi is the first to see us. She stands and walks unbelievably fast in heels that have to be over five inches. Her soft blonde hair is braided and hanging off her shoulder. Her smile is genuine, making me feel worse about my reaction.

  “Taylor, it’s so good to see you again,” she says, smiling. Chandler walks over and slings his arm over her shoulder, splashing his beer in the process.

  “Clarke,” he says, tilting his head to Hayze. “Was wondering when I’d see you again.”

  Hayze laughs once, but it’s missing humor. “You just saw me last week.”

  “Yeah, last time I saw you, you were taken off in cuffs. Good to see you’re out, what happened?” My body goes rigid, I do a quick scan, hoping no one heard him. Chandler’s smiling and I can tell Hayze is trying to play it off as a joke.

  “They let us go…It was just a misunderstanding.”

  Chandler snorts, “Joel seems to have a lot of those. Goddamn idiot, he was just arrested for shit at your cabin. He won’t ever learn.”

  I look at Hayze, confused. “What happened?”

  Kassi laughs nervously as she places her hands on Chandler’s chest. “They probably need to get a table, hon, it was good to see you guys.” She waves and practically tows him away from us.

  Hayze walks to the front podium tells the hostess his name. Her cheeks heat as she gathers menus. She looks right through me, flirting and batting her eyelashes at him. I find myself, not for the first time, wondering how many girls he’s actually been with. He ignores her, but that just makes her try harder. My head has been foggy since Chandler dropped the bombshell on me. Kassi and Hayze couldn’t separate us fast enough, and that makes me suspicious. We’re seated in a booth in the back, but it’s still surrounded by people. This restaurant is always packed.

  Hayze settles in across from me, he grabs his menu and starts looking it over. His eyes are glued intently to the menu, and I can’t help but wonder if he’s doing it on purpose.

  “What was Chandler talking about?”

  He starts coughing, abruptly, his eyes snap up and I see that he’s laughing. I scowl at him and he pulls it together. “I had a bet going on with myself…I thought you would wait until after the food got here.”

  “Cute,” I deadpan.

  “You never cease to amaze me,” He says with a smirk.

  “Stop, what happened?” I grab the menu from him, forcing him in the open.

  He groans and rolls his eyes at me. “That night of the wreck he got arrested. And I didn’t tell you because it’s not our business. What the fuck do we care about that guy anyway?”

  A gangly redhead walks to our table, pausing our conversation. “Hey guys, I’m Rance, I’ll be your waiter tonight. What can I get you to drink?” He asks passing out drink napkins. His eyes fall on me and he smiles.

  “Water is fine,” I say, smiling back at him.

  “Miller tap,” Hayze says, his tone is cut dry as he glares at the waiter.

  “Can I see…your…never mind,” He says, backing off from Hayze’s hard glare. I smile apologetically as he scrambles from the table with our drink order.

  “He was fucking flirting with you right in front of me,” he says, defending himself before I can say anything.

  “Yeah? But did you see me glaring at the hostess for flirting with you?”

  His nose crinkles as he stares at me, clueless. “What are you talking about?”

  “Nothing, forget I said anything. So, Joel, why was he arrested?” Another waiter drops our drinks off at the table and leaves garlic bread in front of us. The aroma fills my senses and it takes all restraint I have to stay away from the bread until we finish talking.

  He sighs, “He had something on him that he shouldn’t have had.”

  And then it hits me. He was adamant about not calling the cops that night. He said we would get arrested. I had to fight to get him to call an ambulance for Jenny and then he rushed us out before they could get there.

  “So, that’s why you wanted to leave? You didn’t want us to get arrested?”

  He takes a bite of bread, watching me as if I just said the most stupid thing he’s ever heard. “Yeah…That’s exactly why I left…I don’t want my girlfriend getting arrested, why would that be a problem?”

  “You could’ve stayed and helped them clean up, or do anything you could for them. You don’t just leave your friend to get arrested!” My voice is low, but I still look around, hoping no one hears our constant bickering.

  “He’s not my friend.”

  “Really, Hayze? Really?”

  He drops the breadstick, rubs his hands on the napkin, and tosses it in front of him. The way he looks at me makes me want to back down—pull all of the words hanging in the air back in my mouth, and have a quiet dinner like everyone else in the restaurant. “If I remember correctly, and I do because I was the only fucking sober one there, I beat the shit out of him for being a dick to you. I got you out of there as fast as I could so you wouldn’t get arrested, and I didn’t say a damn word about it. Any sane person would be thanking me, but you,” He laughs without humor, attempting to calm himself down.

  “You, just want to pick a fight with me. Why the hell does it matter that some dumb fuck was arrested for having coke after we already left?”

  “Coke?” I scrunch my nose and he nods his head. “How much of it did you actually do for me, Hayze? You’re telling me Joel didn’t piss you off about something else, or maybe you didn’t want to get arrested?”

  “Look, this can go two ways, we stop fighting…or not.” He shrugs, nonchalant. “Either way, I’m not leaving you alone. I’m not going to give up on this because we can’t get our shit together. You can make me the happiest man in the world or nag me until I throw this fucking bread basket through the window, but I’m not going anywhere, because you do both of those t
hings better than anyone I’ve ever known. And for some reason un-fucking-known to me, you love me, I’ll take you either way, any day of the week.”

  “You’re right, sorry,” I say.

  “You’re what? I couldn’t hear you,’ he says, laughing.

  I shake my head at him. “That was a one-time apology.”

  He slides over on my side of the booth and kisses me. It’s not a long kiss, it’s one reserved for public places, and yet, it still leaves me breathless.

  “I need you to trust me, Taylor, I’ll tell you anything you need to know,” he says. His eyes are wide, the way they look into mine, willing me to trust him, almost makes me break down into tears again.

  “I trust you,” I lie.

  His mouth quirks into a smile and he presses his lips to mine. A simple white lie erased all doubt from his mind. I trust him as much as I can, but I’m incapable of fully trusting anyone. I hope more than anything that when I let go of everything, the first person I trust is Hayze. But my overactive mind won’t allow it right now, especially when I hear things like my roommate got arrested for coke casually flow from his mouth as if it’s the most natural thing that’s ever happened.

  “Do you need more time to look over the menu?” Rance asks, looking at Hayze.

  “You know what you want?” Hayze asks me as he glances over the menu one more time.

  “Yeah, I wanted to try this pasta last time I was here,” I say, pointing to his menu. “But we left before we ordered.” This piques his interest and I mentally kick myself for bringing that up.

  “When did you come here?” He asks, his eyes boring into mine.

  “I can come back if I need to?” Rance asks. Hayze shakes his head and tells him our orders. Without another word Rance walks off, leaving me alone to an interrogation. Much to my surprise, Hayze doesn’t bring up the date. I don’t forget about it though; I feel more anxious as time passes. He’s putting off the inevitable.

  “Do you have your schedule for next semester?” He asks, smirking like he already knows the answer. A food runner sets our food in front of us and wishes us a great dinner.

  “Of course. I met with my advisor the first day of early registration, and I…When you and Lea were gone, I ordered my books and found the buildings.”

  He looks at me apologetically and nods. “Sorry,” he murmurs, surprising me. That is a huge step for him.

  “What about you? Everything set for your last semester?” I ask and his eyes light. I still can’t believe he’s graduating next semester and I had to find out at a family dinner. But everything is need to know basis, or a surprise with Hayze. He could’ve showed up at my dorm on his way to graduation and told me, and he would think that’s fine.

  “Yup.”

  “I can’t believe I didn’t know.”

  He laughs, “Why would I tell anyone? It’s not a big deal…”

  “That’s a huge deal! Were you just going to tell me that day or what? Oh, surprise I’m graduating and moving away,” I say, sarcastically.

  He looks at me with his brows raised. “I’m graduating and immediately coming back in the fall…I still have three more years of being here…”

  “I see your point…It’s stupid but I see it,” I laugh. I take the first bite of my food, moaning in approval.

  “It’s good, right?” Hayze asks and I nod. And that’s how dinner goes. No more fighting. No more surprises.

  We leave the restaurant, looking for something to do. As we leave the parking lot and pull out to the main road, I look to my right, seeing police cars parked outside of a bar. “What’s going on over there?” I ask.

  He stops at the red light directly in front of the bar and looks. “The building right there,” he says, pointing to the building in front of the bar. “Is a police station. Cops are always outside. They just sit there and wait for it to close and arrest people.”

  I laugh, “Who puts a bar by a police station?”

  “The same person that would open a dance hall…In any location,” he deadpans. The light turns green and I catch the sign as we pass by.

  “Lea talks about that place all the time! She wants to take me there,” I say, laughing at him. He clearly doesn’t like the place, but I don’t think Hayze likes anything country.

  “Of course she does,” he mumbles. He jerks to the left last minute, sending me flying to the middle console. “Shit, sorry, I don’t wanna go that way. The brick fucks with the car’s alignment.”

  “Oh, we can’t have that. Please slam me around the car to protect your baby,” I say, patting the dashboard.

  He laughs, “I appreciate your cooperation, but I was going to do it anyway.”

  “Are we going back?” I ask, noticing that we’re approaching the campus.

  “We’ll do whatever you want,” he says, shrugging.

  “I never do anything,” I frown. “I don’t even know what there is to do here…All I do is go to work and class, and sometimes Lea drags me to a bar.”

  “Well, let me show you around.” He looks at me for approval and I nod.

  He drives through the narrow, main road, telling me about the town. He seems to have a story about every building and street we pass. The further away from campus we get, I perk up.

  “Oh my god, there’s a miniature golf and bowling alley here?”

  “Yeah…”

  “Is the bowling alley open? Do you wanna go bowling?” I ask, bouncing in my seat.

  His face twists into disbelief as he watches me. “Bowling?”

  “My nana used to take Scott and me bowling all of the time. I haven’t been in forever!” He sighs and pulls into the parking lot.

  “What about Sean?” He asks, smirking. We get out of the car and walk toward the building. The parking lot is almost empty, so we’ll get a lane immediately.

  I laugh, remembering my childhood with her. “She didn’t get along with him. She stopped asking after he told on her to my dad. She liked to drink, but according to her it was for medical purposes,” I say through laughter. “Sean wasn’t having it.”

  “I need to meet this lady. She’s probably the only one in the family that would like me,” he says, holding the door open for me.

  “She passed away.” I look down as I walk through the door. It doesn’t matter how long it’s been or how many times I say it; it still hurts just as bad as the day it happened.

  He cringes. “Shit, I’m sorry, I didn’t know.”

  I rub his arm, hoping to take the tension from the air. “You didn’t know. And by the way my mom likes you and so does Scott.”

  “Half way there,” he says.

  “I break the tie.”

  “Great, so half of the family hates me most of the time,” he laughs and I nudge him. We walk to the tall counter and Hayze tells the man our shoe sizes. The man acts like he knows Hayze, calling him by his first name. Given his appearance, it makes me uneasy. I grab the purple, seven-pound ball and find our lane. I bypass the name selection and start our game just as he walks up.

  “Why’d you leave our names as one and two? I had the perfect names picked out,” He chuckles, knowing why I did it.

  “I thought you were trying to be nice to me,” I say with narrow eyes.

  He shrugs, “I am. This is as nice as I get. Besides, you don’t know what I was going to name you. I would have to tweak it a little but something like your tits are…” I run over to him and clamp my hand over his mouth and he bursts into laughter. I look around, seeing no one is within earshot, I feel better.

  “Hayze,” I say, hushed and daring him to continue. I pull my hand back and point a finger at him as I walk away. I can still hear him laughing as I pick up the ball and try unsuccessfully to hit a pin. Hayze tries to look sincere, but I’m not fooled. To my dismay he gets a strike on his first bowl.

  “Seriously? You didn’t even want to bowl,” I say, throwing my arms out. I’m smiling and playing it off as a joke,
but I really hate losing.

  He walks back, grinning and cocky as ever. He wraps his arms around my middle and I swat at him, giggling. “I’m good at everything,” he whispers, then walks off.

  I watch him skeptically. “Name one thing I’m not good at,” He says, his smile is devious. I roll my eyes, suddenly embarrassed and grab my ball. “That’s what I thought,” I hear him say as I roll the ball.

  “Ha! I’m warming up,” I say, clapping as the ball makes contact with at least one pin.

  He sits up in the seat with his eyes on the screen. “Wow, three pins. That brings your grand total to three.”

  “I still have one more!”

  I toss the ball down the lane and it goes straight into the gutter. I curse under my breath and turn around to walk back. My eyes are avoiding Hayze, because I know he’ll have a comment.

  “I really didn’t see that one coming,” he says as I get back. I collapse into the chair and fold my arms across my chest.

  “Obviously competitive dates are going to be a problem for us,” I say, shooting a glare in his direction.

  “If you don’t like losing, yeah, they will,” he says, amused. He walks over and sits next to me. Without permission, he pulls me into his chest, it’s vibrating with bouts of laughter. “I won’t say anything else, promise. You can stop pouting.”

  “I’m not pouting! It’s your turn, so I just sat down over here,” I say, defending myself.

  “Whatever you say,” he says. He grabs the bowling ball, turning to see that I’m watching him and I roll my eyes. He rolls the ball down the gutter and looks back at me, shrugging.

  “Hayze! Don’t lose on purpose,” I say, complaining.

  He looks at me and laughs. “I already have ten points; it would be impossible to lose.” I glare at him and he holds his hands up feigning innocence. “Let me help you.”

  We spend at least ten minutes going over my wrong form until he’s satisfied. After my first strike I have to endure a round of ‘I told you so.’ Even though we have another game, we leave after our first. I pull the grimy bowling shoes off and hand them to Hayze to take to the front desk. I put our bowling balls up and grab my purse. Realizing he’s been gone for a while, I look around for him and find him at the desk. The man points to me and Hayze jogs over.

  “Ready to go?” He asks, reaching for my hand.

  I nod and walk beside him. “Who was that guy?”

  “That guy,” he says, pointing behind him. “Oh…He use to work at the bar.”

  He holds the door open for me and I walk through. I have a hard time believing he worked at the bar. Only college students work at Mystic. But I refuse to say anything, we’ve both made promises to each other. Other men have lied and let me down before, but that doesn’t mean that Hayze will. I have to remind myself that before my accusations ruin us.

  On the drive back to the dorms I notice he seems nervous. He holds my hand, kissing it at every stoplight. “Why are you being so nice?” I tease him.

  He shrugs as he parks his car in front of the dorm. “I don’t want tonight to end. We’re actually getting along,” he says.

  I smile, thinking I feel the same way. Tonight was perfect. It started out rocky, and after the fight at the restaurant I was unsure how the rest of the date would play out. But I’m ending the evening pleasantly surprised, maybe we fight more than other couples, but this proves we can work through it. We’re the two most mentally fucked up people I know, but that doesn’t mean we can’t have a happy ending together. I press my lips to his. He’s surprise at first, but he melts into it, without holding back.

  “I love you,” he says, brushing his lips across mine.

  “I love you, too. Thanks for the perfect evening.” I grab my purse and place my hand on the door handle, considering inviting him inside. Lea’s home, but we don’t have to do anything. I just don’t want tonight to end.

  “What are you doing tomorrow?” He asks.

  I look up, thinking. “Lea mentioned doing something, why?”

  He cocks an eyebrow, leaning across the counsel, he looks me in the eye. “It’s New Year’s Eve, you’re not going out with my sister.”

  “Don’t tell me what do, Hayze,” I warn him.

  He falls back in his seat, groaning. He pinches the bridge of his nose, before responding. I know it takes every drop of restraint that he has to not yell or fight with me, and I appreciate him trying, but he still can’t tell me what to do.

  “If you respect the last ounce of sanity I have, you’ll go out with me tomorrow,” he says. I laugh at him and he looks at me, confused. I swipe my eyes and try to stop laughing long enough to speak.

  “Do you hear yourself when you talk? You can go out with us,” I say.

  He shakes his head, sighing, “I’ll go. The last thing I wanna do is piss you off after the night we had. But, Taylor, I’m always lookin’ out for you, I’m not letting you and Lea go off together on New Year’s Eve night. You probably haven’t thought about a DD or the idiots that go out.”

  “C’mon, do we ever plan ahead?” I look at him in disbelief.

  “My point exactly, what time do you wanna meet up tomorrow?” He starts the engine in his car. Apparently he’s done with the conversation.

  “I’ll have to talk to Lea,” I say.

  “Or you could just stay over tonight. You wouldn’t have to worry about…”

  “Hayze!”

  “No?” he asks, amused. I know he’s kidding, but my face still heats. There’s an unsaid promise between us to take things slow until we figure this out. But tonight…Tonight changed things. I bite my bottom lip and shake my head as I climb from his car.

  “Goodnight, Babe,” he says as I close his door. I wrap my arms around my middle as the wind picks up. Within the last week the temperature has dropped drastically, sending us into the miserable month of January. I run up the steps, shielding myself from the cold and watch his taillights disappear. My heart drops when he pulls on the main road, I know this is good for us but a part of me wanted him to come back and talk me into staying over. Sighing, I walk inside, maybe tomorrow night.