by Ethan Egorov
“Uh, not really. Why?” he answers.
I shrug, “No reason. Just wondering how things really work in the cult and what not.” I grin. He laughs and shakes his head at me.
“You’re going to have to stop calling it a cult at some point. Since you’re in the club and all.”
“Okay, eventually.” I lie.
“Where were you anyway?” he asks.
“I have a curfew?” I deflect. He gives me one of his looks until I relent.
“I was out with a friend.”
He laughs, “You have friends?”
I reach my leg out to kick his, “Fuck off, I do.”
He flips me off and laughs again. “Who is this friend of yours? As long as it’s not another drug dealer or some shit.” He says more seriously.
I frown at him and he fake apologizes.
“She’s not—” I slip, not meaning to say it was a she.
“Oh, a female friend.” He laughs with one of his ugly snorts.
“Leave me be. It’s not my fault you’re not getting any.”
“I don’t know where you got that false information from Spence.” He chuckles.
“I can deduce,” I snicker. When I don’t really know if I am right or not. Its not like we keep tabs on each other that way but I know him well enough and it doesn’t seem like it.
“I’m going to bed, I’ve had a long night.” I stand.
“I bet you have.” He reaches out and tugs my shirt, like he used to do when we were kids. It yanks my neck and I curse him as I walk off to my room.
I smiled as soon as I saw a text from Jeannine on my phone. It’s sweet how she worried about me. I tell her that I got back safe and already start planning what I’m going to do with her tomorrow. I have no idea where to take her that’s kind of safe. I don’t know where most of the club guys hang out yet. I am running out of places in the woods to bring her.
Either way, I know that I have to see her. I work at the shop tomorrow, so I don’t mind if we end up just hanging out in the back of my truck or something. As long as I am with her, it doesn’t matter.
I strip off and get into bed, thinking of Jeannine as I fall asleep.
“I’m leaving.” Roland barges in my room, way too early and I can already tell.
“Why are you making it sound like you’re dying?” I groan into my pillow, rolling over and shielding my eyes from the sun coming in the window.
“At least don’t forget to lock up whenever you leave. I love this house more than you.” He smirks, looking over me by the door.
“See ya,” I flip him off and he leaves my room with a laugh.
I get up soon after, going to take a piss and brush my teeth. I take my phone with me to the living room and text Jeannine.
Me: Good morning angel.
I wait a few minutes as I make my coffee and find something to eat.
Jeannine: Why are you up so early freak
Me: To talk to you.
I grin to myself and settle on dry oatmeal, before I think of a better idea.
Me: I’m coming to pick you up so we can eat breakfast off each other.
I don’t even check her reply before I get dressed and take off on my bike. I pull up to her house, sort of checking for Tank’s bike, and I don’t see it.
We go to breakfast at a diner before we go to the shop. Unfortunately I couldn’t eat breakfast off her but that’s beside the point. I get to spend all day with her as we head to the shop.
“Tell me more about you. I feel like I don’t know much.” Jeannine tells me. We’re halfway through the day, having folded and stocked merchandise all morning. To be honest, I did most of the work but I didn’t mind it. I don’t really want to talk about this, but the look she is giving me with her eyes all big and brown makes me give in.
“You know about me.” I grin at her.
She sits up on the counter, resting her hands at her sides. My eyes drift down to her breasts like they always do, pressing against the fabric of her shirt. It’s a light pink color that bounces off her tan skin. I stare at her, at how her curly hair fans out around her and the way her jeans hug her ass. Licking my lips, I wish we weren’t talking at all. There are customers coming in and out of the shop, so I can’t really do much.
“I mean, yeah I do. A little. But not stuff about where you grew up and… your favorite color.” She chews at her lip and even though thinking of my childhood takes me to a bad place I grin at her, trying to dodge it. I lean my hip against the counter and look at her.
“My favorite color is green, but not the forest kind. The apple kind.” I say.
She tilts her head at me and gives me one of her prying looks. Her eyes widen as she pouts her lips and then I am pretty much useless.
“Spencer. Why don’t you ever talk about it?” her voice softens. I sigh and run my fingers through my hair.
“I just don’t like to talk about it. It’s not a good story.”
“Well it doesn’t have to be a good story for me to want to hear it.” She runs her hand down my arm and quickly pulls it away, remembering where we are.
I get a tight feeling in my chest, wondering how I can even put this into words. This was the last place I thought I would be doing it. All I have done since coming here is do things when I didn’t think I would have to do them. Like growing up. Getting myself out of bad situations. The club did that, Roland did that for me. Now Jeannine is making me face the last thing I tried to run from.
“We didn’t—Roland and I grew up in a trailer park. Our parents were absolute dead beats. I only remember a little of it. Roland he got the worst of it. So, when we ended up in foster care, he took care of me most of the time cause those people sucked too. I didn’t have a childhood, I…don’t even know what to call it.” I exhale, my mouth going dry and neck tight. I hate talking about stuff like that. There are memories that I don’t bother to recount until they force their way in. Or when Jeannine coaxes them out of me.
“I’m sorry, Spencer. That you went through that.” She softens her voice and gives me a soft look, her eyes relaxing as she looks at me. I smile a bit at her and wish I could hold her close, kiss her, and be anywhere but here right now.
“Thanks. I mean it’s okay now but… sometimes I feel worse for Roland. He had to grow up way too fast. I worry about him, cause he thinks he can do everything. When he can’t sometimes.”
“Like where he is now.” She finishes.
“Yeah. Pretty much.” I answer.
We stay in silence for a while and I just appreciate her company, for all that it’s worth. But I can tell she is not done with her line of questioning. I cross my arms and wait. She looks at me with this softness in her eyes that I haven’t seen before. I am learning about her too, so much every day.
“What were you doing before you joined the club? I was here the last time Rafe left and everyone was talking about him going after his brother or something.”
I chuckle once, it was a few months ago but I remember it.
“Yeah that was the worst shit I got myself into. And I’ve done a lot of things I wasn’t supposed to. Just…” I shake my head and try to figure out how to word this. “I hung out with the wrong crowds. I never did drugs or any of that kind of shit but I sold them. And Roland bailed me out of a lot of bad situations. The last one was so bad… I thought I wasn’t just going to go to jail but get attacked by a gang. And still owe them money.” I laugh once, it’s funny now that I’m not in that situation but it wasn’t so funny then.
“Spencer,” she giggles once and I’m surprised that she did. Then I remember who her dad is and think talking about drugs isn’t that much of a deal breaker.
“Yeah, I know, but you asked. That’s what I was doing.” I sigh, standing up. I lean my hands over the counter and look out at the empty shop before I move closer to her and inhale her scent. It calms me when I feel like part of me is getting messed up inside, recounting all the bad parts of my past.
“Yeah, I asked
. I was just curious. What about ex-girlfriends?” she asks.
I look at her and laugh aloud.
“Well I just meant—not that I’m saying I am your girlfriend now but… shit.” She laughs to herself as her cheeks flush crimson. I laugh at her too and hope she pulls her self together. I stand close enough to her that my hip hits her thigh, and my cock resting in my jeans finds a nice warm place to be.
“I know what you meant. And I don’t do the girlfriend thing, never have before. But I consider you my girlfriend. Should I have played a boombox outside your window and held up a sign? Circle yes or no.” I chuckle.
She grins widely and her blush turns to a flush in her cheeks as her eyes brighten. It feels good to make her this happy, I just hope that I can keep doing it.
“No, this is fine.”
“You have any ex boyfriends I should know about?” I lick my lips, watching her blink rapidly.
“Not really. You forget I’m only twenty.”
“There are sixteen-year olds getting married, it’s valid.” I grin. She shrugs her shoulders and gives me a long look.
“So if you weren’t doing the actual drugs what did you do?” she asks, with her curious tone in place.
“I kept watch. Spied on the other gangs. I move quietly.” I smirk, it was my only talent. Or usefulness at the time.
“Hm. Is that why Rafe thought you would be good in the club? They have guys that do that you know.”
“Yeah I—” I laugh once, “I know. He started pestering me about it.” I lose my grin at the memory. Now I feel kind of bad about saying I didn’t want to be involved in the club. And if I was, maybe I could have been with Roland instead of worrying about him. there’s a fine line.
“Why didn’t you take him up on it?”
“Wow you are full of questions today.” I lean away from her and take a breath.
She sighs and shrugs, not giving up the question.
“I didn’t want to mess up his place at the club if I messed up.” I say. It really was that simple.
“I get that.”
“So if you’re done with your line of questioning, maybe we go take a break?”
18
Jeannine
“Take a break?” I look at Spencer, with his blazing eyes and handsome face, my body reacting already.
I was hesitant about asking him all those questions but I just wanted to get to know him better, I wanted to calm all my wandering thoughts. I never thought he was a bad guy or anything, but knowing he had a past like that was a little worrying. But now I know there was nothing to worry about.
“Yeah angel, a break.” He licks his lips and gives me that hot look of his, setting my body on fire.
I bite down on my bottom lip and cross my legs, trying to quell the pulse there.
“I wish I could. But someone could walk in at any minute. Someone from the club.” I sigh sadly. This guy makes me horny all the time, it’s no good.
“Right… forgot about that.”
“It will pass. And we can… do that later.” I giggle softly. He smiles at my reaction, maybe one day I’ll learn how to be some effortless, sexy vixen but today is not that day.
“Later then.”
The rest of the day passes and we close up, we decide to grab a bite to eat together, before he drops me off back at my car. We have our fun in the back seat, twice, and then I go home without him. That’s why I was surprised when he comes by later.
“What’s wrong?” I ask him, he comes in the back door and I regard him carefully. He looks haggard, and he isn’t wearing his cut.
“Your dad called.”
“Oh my god—” I freak out instantly, he calms me down though. I thought he found out about us or something. We move to the couch and he takes my hand.
“He asked for my help. Him and Roland. At first, I wasn’t going to but I thought… you know I joined the club for my brother. Make up for lost time, I guess. People don’t usually need me for anything, but he does. They do.” He finishes. He seems sure of everything that he says, and that’s what makes me worry less. But when I realize what he is really saying…
“You’re leaving. To go help them.” I say.
He looks me in the eye and nods. “Yeah. But it won’t be for long, I promise.”
“Tank is my dad, Spencer. I know you can’t keep that promise. That’s why my mom left, she couldn’t… she didn’t want to deal with him leaving and not knowing when he was coming back.” I say sadly.
“Are you saying you—”
“No,” I cut him off. “I’m in this with you Spencer. I just… be careful.” I cup his face, rubbing my palm against his stubble. His skin is so warm and comforting. I never thought about what it would take to be involved with an MC guy. Now I am about to find out.
“I love you, Jeannine. I know that—I know it’s quick and we halfway know each other but I just… I love you. I do. And I’ll be careful, so I can come back to you.” He cups my face and kisses me before I can respond. The kiss has all our emotions in it together, our tongues swirling as we taste each other. I can’t get enough of him and I don’t know if that means I love him back.
But he breaks the kiss and leaves before I can figure that out.
Adriana and I meet for lunch, as we do every other day. Spencer left three days ago and I haven’t seen him since, haven’t talked to him either. I know he probably can’t, around the other guys, and he is probably busy. But I wish I could have told him how I felt.
“When are you going to talk to him?” she asks me.
I sip my lemonade and smile sadly.
“I don’t know, when he gets back probably.”
“What if your dad breaks him and makes him talk?” she smiles sadly, trying to get met in better spirits. I told her everything that happened, at saying I love you too in to the darkness after he left. I’m no good at that stuff, I never had to learn how to be.
“Then he may not come back.” I laugh sadly once.
“It will be fine, Jeannine. Don’t worry.”
I look at her sadly. “I will worry. About my dad. My boyfriend. All of it.” It’s the first time I said that out loud, and it feels good. As much as it feels like suffocation.
“Your dad has done this before, they’ll all be okay.” She assures me.
I let her keep me company until she has some other errands to go about. I just go back home and lay on the couch, watching movies. It’s not like Spencer left and is never coming back. It will be like this when I go off to college anyway, but for some reason it hurts all the same.
I love him, so much and so fast. It’s scary but it doesn’t make it any less true. I want to be with him, and I decide I have to tell my dad about us. I’ll tell Spencer what I’m doing first, but I know I have to tell him. I am about to pick another sad movie to watch when my phone buzzes, and it isn’t the ringtone I have for Adriana.
I completely lose my mind when I see it’s Spencer.
Spencer: Come outside.
I frown at my phone, thinking he is sleep deprived or something.
Me: What?
Spencer: Outside angel. Before the neighbors see.
I laugh and get up, swarmed with delight as I go to the back door, our usual place.
I find him leaning against his bike on the side of the garage, under the moonlight his cut is slicked black leather, shining against his frame, his dark jeans making him look like a model.
“What are you doing here?” I run to him, jumping into his arms.
He laughs, wrapping me up tight in his arms as he kisses my cheek, my neck. I turn to kiss him, our lips meeting fully.
“I told you I would be back. I missed you.” He kisses me again, setting me on my feet. I wrap my arms around his neck and smile.
“I love you.” It comes barreling out of me and I can’t stop it. “I should have told you before you left it just took me—I missed you too.” I giggle nervously. He smiles at me as if with awe and I feel myself blushing.
&nbs
p; “I figured. And I still love you, that didn’t change when I left.” He chuckles.
“Oh where is my dad? Is he still gone?” I ask.
“Nah he’s back. Him and my brother are updating the rest of the execs. But I just had to see you.” He cups my face and I swarm with warmth when he kisses my forehead.
“I’m glad you came. I was so worried. What did they make you do anyway?” I ask. It racked my brain the whole time he was gone. Some of the guys are passive, others literally go scare and beat people up. I wondered what he was.
“I kept watch. Got some intel. Turned out to be helpful. You should be proud.” He smirks, gripping my ass.
“I am proud. So you can’t come inside then?” I sigh.
“Probably not but we can meet up tomorrow.”
I nod, reaching up to kiss him. He kisses me back immediately. It is slow and tender until it grows with intensity. I feel him in my core and wish he could come inside, suddenly I want that thrill, but I know better. His tongue swirls against mine and I taste his warmth, sliding against his hard body. God I really love him so much, I don’t even know what to do. So much that I don’t notice bright head lights and the roar of a bike until it all stops.
I jump away from Spencer, squinting into the darkness as I pant. He turns the same time as me.
“What the fuck is going on?”
My heart freezes in my chest, when my dad gets off his bike and roars at the top of his lungs.
“Dad—” I start, but don’t know what to even say.
“You get the hell away from my daughter!” he shouts at Spencer.
“Tank, I can explain.” Spencer walks toward him and I stop him. I have never seen my dad this angry, boiling at the surface.
“No, don’t.” I stop him, grabbing his hand. “Dad, just relax—”
“Relax!” he barely looks at me and keeps coming for Spencer.
“You son of a bitch—”
“Dad please, you don’t understand—” tears stream down my face but it’s no use.