by Ethan Egorov
“I got you flowers.” He pushes them my direction like they’re a hot potato, the worried look on his face makes me smile.
“Thank you.” I take them, a bouquet of lilacs and sunflowers that make me warm from the inside out.
“Come in, I’ll put these in a vase.” I wave him inside and he comes in, standing by the door.
I rush to the kitchen, put them in a vase of water and sniff them with a smile before I walk back to meet him. His hands are stuffed in his pockets, and with his hair combed back like this, he looks absolutely delicious. My body comes alive at just being in his presence.
“You ready?” I beam, slinging my purse over my shoulder.
He nods once, but instead of moving, he just stares down at me. His eyes pin mine for the first time and I’m frozen in his hot gaze.
“What?” I ask, half smiling. His pink lips part before he says anything, his shoulders tense and then fall with a tilt of his head.
“You didn’t tell me you’re a virgin.”
9
Amy
The first thought in my mind is that I’m so bad at trying to be sexy that I look like a fish out of water. But that doesn’t seem plausible. Not with the way Darius is looking at me from head to toe like he wants to eat me. My whole body is on fire, but my brain is frozen in thought.
“What?” I frown, asking with all the confusion that I’m feeling. He drops his chin and steps forward, his heavy boots making a hard noise on the ground, even over the rug. I feel my cheeks heating under his scrutiny. It doesn’t make sense that he would know that. Only Tish and Danielle know that now. Except…
“How do you know that?”
“So, you aren’t denying it?” His lips twitch before his tongue darts out to wet them. I imagine them doing something else and we haven’t even kissed yet. The thought sends another flutter in my stomach. I’m no longer starving for food; I have no appetite with all the somersaults my stomach is doing.
I swallow, “I guess not.” My voice is small but steady. His eyes widen and a flash of darkness hides there, deeper than what was already there before.
“How do you know that anyway?” I ask him again. He shrugs his shoulders and I hear him take a breath.
“Let’s not talk about that.” He turns to the door, but I stop him, rushing to grab his arm. My hand can barely circle around his forearm when I do. He is hot to the touch even through his shirt and jacket.
“Darius, why does it matter?” I ask him. He turns fully and looks down at me, coming closer than he had all night to tower over me. My chest brushes his and I feel my nipples hardening, they’ve never done that to a man before, to the cold maybe.
“It doesn’t. Let’s go, Amy.” He says firmly, so much that I don’t have it in me to even argue with him. I nod once and follow him out into the night air.
I’m glad I wore a dress more freeing at the bottom so it would be easier to get on his bike. I settle my body against him, like normal, and he takes off down the street. My hands are clasped around his chest, right under his sternum. I can feel the pound of his heart under his tight muscles, laying against him is relaxing in every sense of the word. My body is putty, but I tighten my thighs to stay on. What surprises me is once we get to the city, we are at a stop light and he covers my hands with his for a short moment, until the light turns green. I smile so wide I’m sure he can feel it against his back. Once we arrive, I’m almost sad. We pull into a parking garage in the city.
“Where are we going?” I ask him once I get off the bike. I have to give my thighs a little bit of a break, but he already strides off, taking my hand to follow him. His hand is so much bigger than mine and it swallows mine up. I fit into his side like I belong there, even though I know the thought is crazy. But he’s so much bigger than me, than anyone really, it’s a bit of a mind trip.
“To dinner.” He answers simply.
“Yes, I know that but where?” I giggle once.
“Do you have to know everything, Amy?” He looks down his nose at me when we stop at the elevator. He presses the button, brushing closer to me. My eyes drop from his to his lips again. I’ve been thinking about kissing him since we first met years ago and every time after that. The closest I have gotten is his lips on my cheek, but I didn’t get to return that favor.
“No, but—” I start. He gives me a long look that makes me pause. It ends when the elevator opens, and a couple comes walking out. The girl looks obviously at Darius until her boyfriend tugs her away like he’s afraid or something. Maybe the way Darius is holding me around my waist is cause for question, but I don’t mind it. To a bystander it looks like he is dragging me away. It’s just because of how he looks on the outside. If people knew that he wasn’t a massive guy with anger problems they wouldn’t be so judgmental, but it’s not like I can change people.
We ride up to the ground level and exit onto the street. I don’t go downtown often but it’s always milling with people. The last time I went was for a clinical rotation at the hospital here and that wasn’t very fun. But I’ve never been on a date here. He knows where he is going it seems and turns down onto a street with more people and twinkling lights through the restaurants and shops. I spot a cute book store that I had been wanting to check out but never had the chance to, so I’m surprised when he heads that way.
“We’re going to a bookstore?” I ask him. No matter how grumbly he gets at me asking questions or frowns I’m always going to. I’m a curious person. And while I don’t need to know everything, I would like to know a little bit at least.
“Amy.” He deadpans.
“What?” I laugh once. He holds my hand tighter when we cross the street and moves me away from the oncoming traffic when we get back on the sidewalk.
He holds the door open for me when we walk inside. It smells like books and old wood, very much like a bookstore. We pass the tall shelves of books and keep going, like he is taking me to the back ally or something. I briefly wonder if everyone was right about him but shove the thought away, there’s no way.
“Darius, hi.” Someone says from out of nowhere and I jump in my skin, squeezing his hand. He chuckles under his breath and we turn to the voice. An older man with graying hair and kind eyes smiles at us.
“Hey, sorry I’m late.” He lets go of my hand to shake his.
“No worries, I’ve got everything ready for you upstairs.” The man leads us on to an elevator in the very back of the shop, it only has two floors. We cram into the small space. I look up at Darius, still confused as hell but he seems none the wiser to it. His angular nose and sharp jaw still catch my eye, it even looks like he groomed his beard a bit. But I like it either way.
I’m surprised again when the door opens to what looks like a restaurant or bistro of some sort. The space is large, like the book store down stairs, and there is soft music playing over the few tables. We’re led to a table more secluded under the dim lighting. White table clothes and candle table settings to top it off. It’s utterly romantic and doesn’t seem like Darius at all.
“Thanks, Mitch.” Darius shakes his hand and slips a bill in there, too; it looks like a fifty. I wonder where he gets all this money from but don’t want to ask.
“Thank you.” I say to him when he pulls out my chair for me. I get settled and set my purse on the ground by my feet. It’s a little chilly in the room but the heat of my body from anticipation balances it out.
Darius takes his jacket off and lays it over the chair before he sits down. He swallows and looks at me over the table. The small light from the candle makes his eyes blaze and I notice how brown they are for the first time.
“This is really nice.” I say with a small smile.
“Aren’t you glad you didn’t ruin the surprise?” His voice is void of personality, but I know that’s just how he is.
I nod once. I’m not sure how he could have explained this to me without it sounding crazy. The waiter comes, dressed in a suit without the jacket basically, and doesn’t even ta
lk to us. He just delivers water and a starter of bread and oil.
“How did you find this place?” I ask him, and my grumbling stomach comes back into the picture, so I take a piece of the bread and dab it in the oil.
He clears his throat, “I didn’t really have to.”
I give him a funny look as I chew.
“It was my mom’s. A long time ago. Mitch is my uncle.” He explains, adding that he is his mom’s brother. He hadn’t told me she passed away, but I assume as much. Mitch sort of looked like him with the beard and thick hair, but it was very gray.
“It’s really charming, I like it. Do you come here often?” I ask him.
He shakes his head, “Not with people, no.”
“People?” I smirk.
“Women.” His lips form a hard line. I keep eating the bread and he doesn’t seem hungry at all before he takes a piece for himself without the oil.
“Is that why you like to read?” I ask him. My breath falls easier and I’m less nervous around him. I don’t think I ever was though, just a bit anxious about what to do maybe.
“Yeah, my mom loved books. And bread. Which makes sense since we’re Italian.”
My eyes widen, “I didn’t know that.” I laugh once. But looking at him now it makes sense. The soft features and beard, dark hair and eyes with tanned skin. I swallow at that making him even hotter, somehow.
“Well, now you know.”
I giggle once, “Kit and I are just beach blondes.” I smile.
He licks his lips and nods, “I like the color of your hair. It’s bright, smooth.” His voice hardens and bread gets stuck in my throat. I cough it away a little and am glad the waiter comes back, this time with two appetizer plates of salad.
We eat somewhat silently, and I like the comfortable silence between us. It’s easy to be around him, that was never the problem. I just feel like I don’t have enough experience sometimes, especially now that he knows the truth about me. Should I be rubbing his leg under the table? Purring and batting my eyes? I don’t know.
I can only manage to keep quiet about it until halfway through the dinner course of chicken risotto.
“Are you going to tell me how you found out about my… being a virgin and all?” I ask quietly. My voice shakes this time and my fingers prick with nerves. I drop my fork and it clinks on my empty plate. I ate all the food, it was delicious. But Darius is more of a slow eater, it seems, and still has some left. He takes another bite and watches me as he chews, I watch his smooth lips in a trance. It’s like he does this on purpose, leaves me on the edge. He controls the situation at any moment, and I let him, but I feel like I am in control when I do that too.
“I was talking to your brother. It came up.” His voice is hard yet thin, nothing else to be interpreted in his words.
I lick my lips, “How does my sexual history just come up in conversation?” I have half a mind to hand it to Kit the next time I see him but then that might give us away.
He shakes his head. “It wasn’t like that. I was telling him about Olivia thinking of moving away and he brought you up. Said he worries about you cause of how guys treated you in the past and I asked why.”
I roll my eyes at that. Kit has always told me that I’m too nice, that I see too much good in people. I have never been able to have my guard up, though; I always give people a chance even if it ends up hurting me. Which it did. Kit has always been protective of me and it’s sweet until he goes around accidentally telling people that I’m a virgin.
“Oh. So, he told you about…”
“Your shitty exes. Yeah, he told me.”
I swallow and lean back in the chair. The savory taste of the meal keeps my mouth from going dry, but I drink the wine that was paired with our meal anyways.
“I’m sorry that happened to you. Twice.” He adds and I frown at him, but he has the smallest smile on his face and it’s the closest he gets to joking.
I sigh and think this is too much heavy talk for a first date. But we’ve known each other so long it doesn’t feel like a first date.
“Yeah. The second time wasn’t as bad, because I wasn’t surprised about it you know. But the whole having an entire girlfriend thing got to me. I don’t know why men do that. I felt bad for the girl; I still do.” I shiver at remembering the day he confronted me. He didn’t even have the decency to date outside the hospital. It’s why I never went back for my clinical rotation there. I went to the country hospital almost an hour away and lost sleep over it.
Darius shakes his head, “Not all men. Certainly not me.”
I feel bold and lean forward, “So if I said I wasn’t going to have sex with you that would be okay with you?”
He licks his lips, “If it wasn’t you, I’d end things, not cheat. But it’s you we’re talking about, so I wouldn’t even think about breaking up with you. It’s not about that. If I only wanted you for sex, I would have done it ages ago.” He exhales.
I stare into the expanse of his eyes in shock. My throat tightens as my neck cranes to look at him closer.
“So, why’d you ask me like it was a problem?” I question. He twists his lips and then purses them.
“Because I was surprised is all. A woman as sexy as you… it’s unbelievable.”
I swarm inside at being called sexy, it’s not something I ever used in the describe myself category, but he says it so confidently, I don’t argue with him. We get closer to each other, leaned over the table. And my desire for him starts to grow. I’m stirring on the inside, brewing up a storm of need for him. It’s stronger than anything I have ever felt.
“Well, it’s true. Does that scare you?” I blink slowly. He tightens his jaw and the tendons of his neck pulse more.
“Hell, yeah. It scares me. Cause now there is so much more I want to do to you.”
“Holy shit,” I breathe, but then pause because I hadn’t realized I said that out loud.
He smirks, giving me a long look before he leans back in the chair. Our moment is interrupted by the waiter dropping off gelato and I glare at him for interrupting, but he is gone soon after. We stare at each other a bit longer until his half smile is noticeable. I wish he would fully smile sometimes, but he doesn’t. This is the most I can get from him.
“Eat your dessert, Amy.” His lips tighten into a hard line and his eyes darken. I don’t hesitate before reaching for my gelato, it looks like a strawberry or cherry flavor. I taste it and it is very much strawberry. He watches me as I eat, and it doesn’t even feel weird. I try to suck on the spoon a bit longer but it’s really good, I just want to eat it. Eventually he takes a few bites of his but that’s it.
“Are you watching your weight or something?” I giggle.
His shoulders shrug, “Somewhat.”
“Hm. I don’t believe in depriving myself of food. Maybe I’d be thinner if I did.” Even in high school and college when I was more active, and on a sports scholarship, I ate all the dining hall food. Sometimes I look at Tish and wish I had the effortless flat tummy, or Danielle and her toned arms, but it just doesn’t work that way for me.
“Hell no. You shouldn’t be any thinner.” Darius clears his throat, “I guess not unless you want to.”
“Is that why you wanted me to buy groceries?” I giggle.
“I just want you to take care of yourself. You keep doing it for everyone else.” He says. And I know he means my brother. I finish eating, take a deep breath and lean forward. I know it makes my breasts perk up in my dress and he glances at them again.
“I am taking care of myself. Despite what Kit thinks, I’m doing this.” I gesture between us. He nods and pulls in closer. He takes my hand over the table and kisses my wrist and palm. As I thought, his beard tickles but it’s very soft. It’s like laying my hand against a fur pillow.
“Good.” He says.
He settles the bill and then we get ready to leave. I don’t even check the time; it seems to disappear whenever I’m around him. I find a bathroom to freshen up in an
d chew a mint before I walk back out and find Darius. He holds my hand on the way out.
“I want to look around.” I tug the hand Darius is holding and he follows me with a gruff. It feels nice, making him do what I want for a change.
I wave through the shelves. They aren’t labeled, everything is mixed in like you should land wherever you’re meant to. I find a cover that makes me giggle. Darius is looking elsewhere, and I lift the book up to read the description. It’s some romance about an enigmatic manor owner and unsuspecting shop worker falling in love. The cover is very risqué, but it’s the dark-haired muscular man that makes me chuckle.
“Darius, I didn’t know you were a model.” I get his attention. He turns with a funny look.
“What?”
I show him the cover and he stuffs his hands in his pockets with a ‘really’ look.
“It’s nice.” I put the book back and go over to him. I keep walking until he is almost up against the bookshelf and settle my hands on his hips. His skin is hot through his shirt, and I run my fingers across the muscles of his Adonis belt in awe. His breathing stays even but his eyes darken to show he is being affected by this. It gives me courage and I continue. I step up closer to him so my naval is against his hips, and when I press more, I feel his cock.
I gasp when he suddenly turns me and puts me up the shelf instead, with a heavy thump rattling the books. My breath catches and I breathe heavily, staring up into his eyes. His lips are parted as his eyes blaze.
“Careful, Amy.” He nearly growls.
“What do I have to be afraid of? You keep saying that.” I whisper breathlessly. My legs are wobbly, I’m only leaning against the shelf as he holds me up with his hands firmly on my arms.
“Plenty.” He leans in closer, my mind swirls with the scent of him and sweetness of the wine on his breath. I lick my lips and am glad I didn’t put any more lip gloss on because I have a feeling he would have ruined it anyway.