Utopia Project: Everyone Must Die

by Billy Dering

  “Not infuse, but free, humanity. It’s already there within each of them, even if deep inside. It just sounds like this society keeps them so regimented that they don’t really know what it means to be alive.”

  “Not just regimented, but conditioned like Pavlov’s dogs,” she added.

  He sat thinking, engrossed in his thoughts, connecting dots.

  Heidi took the moment to add, “And I used to think the society we knew was too controlled and regimented, and in some ways it was. But compared to this?”

  “You know… it would be their ultimate nightmare,” he continued as he gazed not at her, but through her. “Their people actually becoming human could destroy this ‘perfect’ society they’ve created, and that Sara, Brian, and our families died because of.”

  Trying to find his eyes, she didn’t seem bothered by his lack of eye contact. Her optimism actually seemed to be swelling. “Again history could be altered, but for the better,” she concluded. Putting her hand on his arm and leaning forward as she knelt, she looked deep into Kid’s eyes. “Would that be worth fighting for?”

  He raised one eyebrow and sighed. “Well…” As he turned his head, he lost the air from his lungs. He could swear that for just a split second, he was face-to-face and eye-to-eye with Sara. The flash of her presence, like a lightning strike, stunned him. Turning back to Heidi, and matching the intensity of her gaze, he said with a sense of purpose just one word. “Yes.”

  She shuddered. Taking a deep breath and closing her eyes, she gently squeezed his arm. “Thank you,” she whispered, sounding relieved.

  As the tone and vibe of his own one-word answer rang in his ears, even Kid was chilled to the bone.

  “That will be our mission and purpose. Otherwise, what would we do? Spend our lives hiding, and running…” she concluded.

  “It is all we have left to fight for, even if it costs us our lives,” he added as he thought of Sara.

  Grabbing the razor from next to the tub and soaping up his face, Kid shaved while they continued to talk. For almost 30 minutes they talked about Brian and Sara, and their families, and how hard it was to cope with all the loved ones they’d lost. Jess and Maria had lost their families, but at least they had each other. He began to see a side of Heidi he had never seen before. The more they talked, the more he saw her differently. This was difficult for him, but he imagined it was difficult for her as well. They had hated each other for so long.

  “At some point we definitely need to regroup. We have no plans, supplies, arms,” he noted as he refocused.

  “Probably no hot water either,” she added, seeming a little embarrassed by the present circumstance. “I’ll bet that water isn’t even warm anymore.”

  Kid got a chill as he realized how cold the water was. He hadn’t even been aware of the water temperature.

  Heidi threw him the ripped blanket she was still holding in her hands. “I’ll check on your clothes and see how dry they are. I got the fire really kicking in there when I hung them up.” She walked back in a moment later with a thicker blanket in her hands, but none of Kid’s clothes.

  “Not kicking enough?” he asked sarcastically as he stood wrapped in the ripped blanket.

  “I guess not.” She laughed.

  Her chuckle caught Kid off guard. She usually sneered at his sarcastic one-liners. He didn’t know how to react.

  “Just wrap yourself in this for now,” she said.

  He threw the dry, thicker blanket around his body and pulled the wet, ripped one from underneath and handed it to her. Heidi grabbed the edge of the thicker blanket, and lifted it off of him. For a second, he thought his naked body was going to be exposed, so he instinctively covered himself with his hands.

  “Oh, I’m sorry.” She pulled the thicker, green blanket around him. “I was just trying to wrap you tighter.”

  “Thanks. It’s definitely better.”

  She was rubbing her hand on the blanket, saying, “Good… good,” when both were suddenly taken back by their closeness. Kid shifted his weight from one foot to the other a few times and pulled the blanket even tighter around his body. She cleared her throat. “Let’s go see what Jess and Maria are up to.”

  Stepping into the main room, he asked, “Where’s Jess?”

  “Keeping watch up on the roof,” Maria answered.

  “Still no sign of any soldiers?”

  “Nope. And let’s hope it stays that way.”

  Kid, now shaved and clean, laid down on the bed.

  Heidi was hanging the ripped blanket next to the stove. “You know, I was thinking. What if…”

  Those were the last words he heard before nodding off.

  Chapter 30

  January 1, 2045

  Sunday, Early Evening

  The Pine Barrens of New Jersey

  Six days after the event

  Kid woke up, and laid still. He turned his eyes and spotted Heidi sitting at the heavy wooden table. While asleep, his brain must’ve been crystallizing the essence of the conversation he had with her when he was bathing. The first conscious thought he had upon waking was that Heidi had helped bring him back from a steep and dangerous precipice, one in which more than just his life may have hung in the balance. For that, he could never look at her the same way, and could never repay her. She was the last person he would’ve ever thought could, or would, save him.

  With dusk encroaching, Heidi had lit a candle and placed it in the middle of the table. It was then that Kid realized she had the cabin’s logbook in her hand.

  “Listen to this entry, Maria,” Heidi said and started reading.

  “February 1987: Can’t believe this logbook survived the awful fire over Presidents Day weekend. Cabin was burned to the ground. I reckon the only good thing is that we still have our table and our logbook, both of which we found on the ground outside. This logbook has our whole history in it. The first entry was written in this book, on this table, in 1922. Looking at the logs over the past few months, maybe the arsonists were the kids who found this place and started having parties here. As I sit here and stare at the smoldering embers of our Ironside Gun Club, I can only hope that the people who did this didn’t mean to burn it down, and that they were just stupid and careless.”

  “They are lucky their logbook even survived,” Maria noted.

  Kid heard footsteps on the roof, and a moment later, Jess walked into the main room. “Night is falling, so we can’t see anymore,” he noted.

  “Hey, Jess,” Heidi whispered “Do you realize this book and this table were from the original 1922 cabin? They survived the horrible fire of 1987 when arsonists burned the original cabin down.”

  “It wasn’t arson, it was an accident,” Kid muttered with his face buried in his blanket.

  “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you.”

  “I was already awake. Anyway, the kids that did it admitted to it many years after. They said the fire was an accident.” He yawned. “The flue pipe opening was cracked, so the wall caught fire. They thought they had put it out. They didn’t mean to burn it down.”

  “I was wondering why anyone would to burn this place down,” Heidi noted. “From the entries before that one, Ironside had become the premier party spot.”

  “Maria, could you please hand me those?” Kid sat up and pointed to his now dry clothes hanging next to the wood stove.

  She brought them over and sat next to him on the bed. “Are you alright?” she asked in a moment of sincerity as she put her arm around him.

  “Hanging in there.” He was still not entirely with it.

  “Good.” Maria punched his thigh, but not as hard as usual.

  “See anything outside?” he asked.

  She shook her head. “All is clear. Maybe they’ve given up or they froze to death. We’ve been out here two days now.”

  “With them, somehow I doubt it.” He put his clothes on and sat back on the bed.

  “No, it’s possible that they gave up. Elder-1 is with them,
” Heidi interjected.

  “What difference does that make?”

  “He wouldn’t be that irrational. He lived in the real world before that Utopia Project.”

  “Not irrational?” Jess asked. “They destroyed the entire world.”

  “True,” she conceded. “But I can’t believe he would be so stupid as to freeze to death trying to find us.”

  “Maybe not, but his soldiers, they are a different story,” Jess said as he opened the floorboard. “We’ve seen enough of them. They just don’t give up for anything,”

  “No, but if they weren’t raised in that environment, things might be different. All they know how to do is follow orders and regimens.” Heidi appeared to feel sorry for them.

  “Yeah, and right now their orders are to kill us,” he countered.

  With darkness falling on the Pine Barrens, they lit a few candles and put them on the wooden table inside the cabin. After eating baked beans they made coffee and conversed for a while. Kid tuned in and out, experiencing periods of sudden and painful grief.

  “Let me get this straight. They work less hours, don’t have to pay for anything, eat good food, and have orgies?” Jess summarized after listening to the girls’ description of the Utopia Project society. “Wow. Maybe we should go back.”

  Maria backhanded his shoulder. “Trust me, you wouldn’t want to be there.”

  “And they plan on inhabiting the mainland on Long Beach Island?”

  She nodded.

  Heidi watched intently as Kid tied a broken rubber band to a nail on the end of a long, skinny piece of wood. “What are you doing?”

  “You’ll see. It has always been my outlet.” He tied the rubber band to the other end of the piece of wood. “I need a bridge-piece,” he said aloud and stood up.

  The others watched him, looking curious.

  “Ah..,” He picked up a small roofing nail, hammered it into the piece of wood near an end, and then bent it over. He laid the rubber band over the bent nail and began plucking it. “Sounds like a D note.” He began pressing the rubber band down against the wood with one hand while plucking with the other.

  “Nice guitar. And now, for your listening pleasure…” Maria held her hands up toward him.

  Kid continued to finger pick notes until he knew the layout of his makeshift fretboard. He quickly found the root-notes to a song he had been recently working on.

  Maria’s ears perked up. “Oh, I love that one.” She whispered to Heidi, “I bust his chops, but I have to admit, he’s a pretty damn good songwriter.”

  “What are you playing?” Heidi asked.

  “‘Angels Never Cry,’” Maria said without hesitation, answering for him. “Sing it for her, Kid.”

  “Alright, but just the pre-chorus and chorus, I haven’t found the verse notes yet.” He cleared his throat.

  “I hear an angel crying up above

  denying it’s the end of love

  but to ice has turned the rose and the dove

  crushed in the palm of the world’s iron glove

  and the Angels can’t believe their eyes

  but the tears that fall don’t tell no lies

  they just know that love can never die

  but they also know that Angels never cry

  Angels never cry. Not in Heaven.

  Angels never cry. Not in Heaven.”

  Plucking the root notes on his one-string guitar, Kid started the chorus over again. He was struggling to keep Sara out of his mind, but her presence consumed him.

  The second time he sang the chorus, Heidi joined him. Together they sang the words with great conviction.

  “Angels never cry. Not in Heaven

  Angels never cry. Not in Heaven,

  Angels never cry…”

  Kid omitted the end of the last sentence, but since Maria had heard the song many times, she whispered the words.

  “Unless they’re falling down to earth…”

  Jess and Maria stared in amazement, and seemed surprised and inspired. Jess uttered, “That was… incredible.”

  “I didn’t know you sang so well,” Maria turned to Heidi, and shook her hand. “I’ve never heard you sing before.”

  “I don’t usually sing, at least not publicly. But I couldn’t help myself there. I was really feeling it.”

  After sitting in silence for a few minutes, Jess said to Maria, “I can’t believe what you told me yesterday about that society. They can just say one word and people basically become zombies?”

  “Worse!” she said. “They collapse in a heap. Even zombies can walk. And that would have been us with just a few more days of their brainwashing and doping us up.”

  Kid turned. “What’s the word?”

  “I. O. N.,” Maria spelled out. “I’m afraid to even say it.”

  “Ion? That doesn’t sound very scary to me,” he noted.

  “Don’t underestimate its power.” Heidi shivered. “It instantly incapacitates a person, until it is reversed.”

  “What prevents them from saying it to each other all day? I mean, if one guy gets pissed at another, he could just yell this word and put the guy in a zombie-like trance?” Jess asked.

  “No. They’re all conditioned to not be able to say any word beginning with the long vowel ‘I’, so they could never even begin to utter the word,” Heidi answered.

  “They can’t say, ‘I’?” Kid asked.

  “No. Actually, it is one of their society’s mottos. ‘Here there is no…I,’” she recited and shuddered.

  “They live by this motto, but can’t say it?” Kid seemed perplexed.

  Maria jumped in, “Actually, rather than trying to say ‘I’, they just point to the corner of their eye.” She then abruptly changed the subject. “Hey, are we going to leave here any time soon? I’m feeling kind of cooped up out here. Not to mention, I need to grab my diabetes medicine before I have an episode.”

  “Let’s leave tomorrow morning, alright?” Jess said, turning to Kid.

  “I guess so.” He was reluctant. He knew they had to go, but a part of him felt like he was leaving Sara behind.

  “We can’t just sit out here, and wait for them to come forever.”

  “I know… I know,” Kid replied, feeling conflicted as he got up and walked out the door.

  The others sat in somber silence.

  Kid approached Sara’s grave. In the gray cover of dusk, the outline of the grave marker seemed surreal, like an animation. Thinking he could not possibly have any tears left to cry, having drained every last drop from the well, he fell down on one knee as rivers of tears ran down his face. Several minutes later, he dragged himself back inside the cabin.

  As he walked in, Jess peeked his head outside. He glanced in every direction and then closed the door. He pushed down the heavy wood plank to lock it. “Let’s get some sleep.”

  “I just can’t wait to get back into some normal clothes. I’m sick of this uniform,” Heidi said as she began to pull down her zipper. “Makes me feel like a number,” she continued as she flicked the neatly embroidered 19796 on the front of her gray jumper. As her modesty kicked in, she slipped under the bed covers and finished taking off her gray jumper. She pulled her uniform out from under the blanket and laid it next to the bed.

  Kid picked it up and hung it next to the wood stove. “You’ll thank me tomorrow when it’s nice and warm.”

  “Heidi, I can’t believe, in light of the circumstances, you’re still such a prude. Hey Kid, look the other way.” Maria took off her uniform and hung it next to the fire herself. “Miss Priss over there,” she said as she nonchalantly walked across the room, wearing just a bra and underwear.

  “Hey, I might be the last hope for female decency on this planet,” Heidi countered.

  “Yeah, can’t help you there,” Maria said as she climbed into bed.

  “See what I go through?” Jess said as he walked toward the bed and slid under the blanket.

  Kid and Heidi again bunked together. She w
as lying on her side facing the window, so he put his hand on her shoulder and whispered, “Heidi?”

  “Yeah,” she whispered back, seeming startled by his gentle touch.

  “Thank you.”

  “For what?”

  “Helping me get through today.”

  “It’s tough, believe me, I know.”

  “Also, I’m sorry for treating you badly since the day we met. I’m an idiot. I never let myself see you for who you really were, and are,” he said.

  Heidi smiled. “Alright already, I’m sorry too. Now go to sleep.”

  After a pause, she grabbed his hand from her shoulder, lifted her elbow and was pulling his arm down across her upper torso. Taking the cue, he moved up against her. His forearm felt the comforting warmth of her breasts, and his body felt the heat of her exposed flesh through his clothes.

  “I guess we could start by altering the course of our own history,” she whispered as she stared out the window.

  Facing the same way, Kid gazed upon the stars, the light of many refracted and distorted by the cracks in the window pane. “We should,” he whispered.

  “But also for the better,” she added.

  He absorbed the human tenderness and comfort of the moment. As he drifted off to sleep with his arm around her, Kid felt a warmth their blanket could never provide, and their blanket was doing a damn fine job.

  IV

  REVELATIONS

  Chapter 31

  January 2, 2045

  Monday, Before Dawn

  The Pine Barrens of New Jersey

  Seven days after the event

  In the wee hours of the next morning, Heidi’s dreams came to a sudden end. Wide awake, she listened attentively. All was quiet. No sign of any soldiers. She sat still in bed, absorbing the warmth and comfort of Kid’s embrace. She felt secure and protected. His arm was wrapped around her, as it was when they had fallen asleep. He had slept in his clothes, but his manly body felt warm against her mostly bare skin. She wished she could cover every inch of her body with that feeling.