Will You

by S J Crabb

  He shrugs. “Don’t be. It’s been this way for as long as I can remember. I don’t actually know what a normal family looks like.”

  “They must have been in love once though?”

  He nods. “In the early days, I think they were. I’ve seen the photos and occasionally they reminisce about a good memory and I see a wistful look in my mum’s eyes. However, they didn’t walk the same path and somewhere along the way they split up and now walk parallel to each other. Both in the same direction but very much on their own. Occasionally they meet up with someone else on their respective paths who keep them company for part of the way but ultimately, they keep on walking in sync. I’m not sure why they do but something is keeping them connected and I like to think it’s not just the company.”

  His words make me sad and he laughs softly and pulls me up. “Don’t feel sorry for me. As I said, it’s what I’m used to. I’m just not prepared to follow their blueprint. I doubt there is that perfect life out there, anyway. Who knows, you may prove me wrong because I can’t wait to meet your parents and see what living the dream is really like?”

  I follow him back into the kitchen and think about my parents. They are nothing like Jack’s and their home nothing like this one. I feel ashamed that I’d been embarrassed for him to see where I come from but now, I couldn’t care less. My life is real life, not this fabricated web of lies designed to impress which actually only repels. This house isn’t comfortable. These people aren’t interesting and I can’t wait to leave this magazine spread and get back to where I feel comfortable and real.

  16

  Amanda looks up as we head back into the kitchen and says in a strained voice. “Take a seat, dinner is almost ready. Jack, make sure you fill Nelly’s glass while I call the others.”

  As he heads dutifully to the fridge, I am amazed to see Amanda pick up a silver bell lying on the island unit in the centre of the room and ring it loudly. What the…?

  I daren’t look at Jack and just gulp back the wine quicker than I should to stop myself from laughing.

  It doesn’t take long for the others to join us and I notice that Jack’s father doesn’t make eye contact with Amanda. Ariadne and Godfrey take their seats pouring over Ariadne’s phone, no doubt sorting out her latest Instagram post. I feel bad for Amanda who appears to be doing absolutely everything and say loudly, “Would you like some help, Amanda?”

  She looks at me with surprise and shakes her head. “No thank you, Nelly. It’s kind of you to ask but I’m best left to my own devices. Just sit back and enjoy your meal.”

  She heads over and dishes out plates of spaghetti to each of us and says, “Help yourself to salad and James, make sure everyone has a drink, if it’s not too much trouble.”

  Her voice is hard and laced with steel and I sneak a look at James who just smiles and says lightly, “Ok, what can I get you, Nelly?”

  “I’m fine thanks, Mr Mason.”

  He grins. “Call me James, dear. Mr Mason is so stuffy and boring.”

  I nod and he turns his attention to Godfrey. “How about you Godfrey, do you fancy a beer?”

  I giggle as Godfrey looks horrified. “No thank you, James. I’m happy with a glass of Prosecco if there’s one going.”

  Amanda comes and sits down and the atmosphere is tense. She helps herself to salad and we all eat in silence. After a while, she turns to Jack and says with interest, “How’s the shop going. I’m sorry we couldn’t make the opening.”

  He just shrugs and says lightly, “It’s going as well as can be expected.”

  Ariadne wrinkles up her little nose and says dismissively, “I can’t imagine why you opened it in the first place. Aunt Alice is sure to give you your inheritance, after all, you are her favourite.”

  Jack looks irritated. “Shut up Ariadne. You’re talking rubbish as usual.”

  She sneers. “Is that the best comeback you’ve got? You really are stupid you know, Jack.”

  I feel a little lightheaded as Amanda bangs the table and says angrily, “Stop it, both of you. What must our guests be thinking?”

  Godfrey doesn’t look as if he’s thinking much at all as he continues to study Ariadne’s phone. James just raises his eyes and eats his food as if he’s on some sort of time restriction and Amanda sighs heavily. “Slow down, James. You’ll get indigestion and I’ll pay for it when you can’t sleep tonight.”

  He shrugs. “Then sleep in the guest room like you usually do.”

  The look she gives him would turn the milk sour, and she snaps, “If you were a gentleman you would take the spare room from time to time. I mean, it’s not too much to ask considering you’re the reason I need it.”

  James just throws her a warning look and I feel Jack tense beside me. Watching his family is like watching a storm break. There is so much underlying tension in the room that is simmering under the surface. Ariadne looks bored by it all and just examines her nails and then sighs. “I’m never using that salon again. Look at the state of these nails. They cost me a fortune and I can see the brush strokes from here. Look, Godfrey, they’re appalling.”

  I look across and can’t see anything wrong and she catches my eye and raises a perfectly shaped eyebrow. “Do you have Instagram, Nelly?”

  I shake my head. “No.”

  She looks surprised. “What about Twitter?”

  “No.”

  “Goodness, how surprising. You must be on Facebook though.”

  I nod miserably. “I do have a business page on there for my shop but I don’t post much.”

  Ariadne and Godfrey look at me as if I have two heads and then she holds out her hand and says firmly, “Every business should have all avenues of social media. Hand me your phone and I’ll set it up for you.”

  Jack says shortly, “Leave her alone. Knowing you, you just want to add her as another one of your followers. If Nelly wants to set up social media, she’s smart enough to do it herself.”

  Ariadne huffs. “I’m just trying to help, Jack. You’re so touchy these days. To be honest, if anyone’s got a right to be touchy it’s me. I’m the one about to spend the next few months in Hell at the old folk’s home. I’m the one who has to wear some sort of…” she shivers, “… uniform and I’m the one who will dread going to work every day. All I can say is Aunt Alice had better follow through with her promise because if she does, I’m going to reward my sacrifice with an all-inclusive 5-star trip to the Maldives with Godfrey.”

  Amanda says wearily. “Yes, it’s going to be a tough few months, that’s for sure.”

  Jack says slyly, “So, when’s the first lesson, mum?”

  Amanda visibly shivers and says dully, “Tonight, actually. That’s probably why your father’s home for once. We’re due to start our lessons later and I’m dreading every excruciating minute of it.”

  James nods irritably. “Daft old bat. Fancy dreaming up this ridiculous will. Why she couldn’t just leave it like everyone else does is beyond me. Mind you, she was always conniving and vindictive.”

  I feel shocked as Amanda says tartly, “Have some respect, James. Aunt Alice has always been good to us and if this brings her happiness, then so be it. We will just have to suck it up and do as she says and play along.”

  I feel ill listening to them. This isn’t right. They are monsters all of them. How could they be so cruel? I feel a little sick and the food tastes like dust in my mouth. Then I feel a warm hand in mine and as Jack gently squeezes it I feel bad for him. If this is bad for me, it’s a hundred times worse for him.

  Silence descends on the table and I say tentatively, “I would love to try salsa dancing. You may really enjoy it.”

  James laughs loudly. “You’re funny, Nelly. I think both Amanda and my dancing days are well and truly over, in fact, it’s just an inconvenience that’s getting in the way of more important things that we would rather be doing.”

  Amanda says derisively, “Yes, James. What is it you would rather be doing, exactly?”

 
I try to make myself as small as possible as they share a frosty look and Jack sighs. “Nelly’s right. It may be an enjoyable experience if you give it your best shot.”

  Ariadne laughs shrilly, “Says the guy who's come out the best in all this.”

  Jack frowns. “For your information, mine is the most challenging.”

  I think I hold my breath as he continues. “I must run a business with staff and make it work. I have to work there all day when it’s not what I want to do in life. This is Aunt Alice’s dream and I’m living it. If I had my way, I would be backpacking around the world and far away from the madness that surrounds this family.”

  Ariadne wrinkles her nose again and sneers. “Good god, Jack, where’s the fun in slinging on a backpack and roughing it when you can travel the world in five-star luxury.”

  She laughs shrilly. “Next you’ll be telling us you want to build an orphanage in a war-torn country.”

  Godfrey laughs. “Could you imagine anything worse? Some guys from school did that once. I think it broke them. You should stick to your own environment and what you know best. Leave it to the people who like doing that sort of thing and spend your days enjoying life instead.”

  I think I hate Godfrey.

  I think I hate Ariadne.

  I think I hate Amanda and I have absolutely no time for James.

  The trouble is, I think I love Jack because this has shown me even more why he is so special. Living among these people must be some cross to bear and yet he isn’t like them in the slightest. He is kind, considerate and funny. He hasn’t complained about living Aunt Alice’s dream and has gone about it with the sort of attitude that means he will succeed.

  I can tell he’s uncomfortable, and that makes two of us. Angela was right, you never know what’s going on at home which makes people the way they are and I’m just amazed that Jack turned out as well as he has.

  17

  Dinner is sublime. Despite her obvious flaws, cooking is not one of them and I mean every word when I thank Amanda for such a lovely meal. Following the pasta was a delicious chiffon pie. It was light and melted in my mouth and the base was crunchy and delicious. The wine was obviously of the expensive variety and the surroundings impressive. However, the people that shared it with me were of the worst kind. I feel a new kind of respect for Aunt Alice because it’s obvious why she’s done this. In fact, I’m just amazed she’s leaving them anything at all and not donating it all to charity because if I were in her shoes, this family wouldn’t get a penny, except Jack, of course.

  Amanda and James head off to get ready for salsa lessons and Ariadne and Godfrey head out for drinks with friends. Jack drives me home and I can tell he’s embarrassed.

  “I’m sorry, Nelly, that was difficult.”

  “It’s fine. Not every family is textbook. I’m guessing your family has many redeeming qualities. Maybe they just had an off night.”

  He shakes his head. “No, that was pretty much a normal night at home. Maybe you should invite me to meet your parents and I can see what a proper family talks about at the dinner table.”

  Thinking of my family, I smile to myself. “Yes, that sounds a good idea, I’ll set it up.”

  As we continue to drive back to my flat, I feel a sense of unease. Jack appears to have two challenges whereas the others only one. I wonder why that is?

  Jack interrupts my thoughts saying, “What are you thinking?”

  “Nothing much. One thought did cross my mind though. Why have you got two challenges and the others only have one?”

  For a moment there’s an awkward silence. It almost feels as if he’s playing for time because he doesn’t answer right away. Then he says in a small voice. “I don’t know. Maybe she thinks I need to learn the most. Maybe I’m so far gone she wants to teach me a lesson. Who knows why but it doesn’t matter? All that does is that we all carry out her wishes as requested.”

  Once again, I feel a bitter taste in my mouth as I realise just what we’re doing here. Duping an old lady into thinking her request is real. The silence sits heavy in the air and then I say sadly, “I can’t do this.”

  He says sharply, “What do you mean, you can’t do this?”

  “Fool your aunt. It’s not right and if I help you I’m no better than your family.”

  He says roughly, “What are you saying?”

  I think I hold my breath as I say sadly. “I think you’ll have to find someone else to help you. I’m sorry, I don’t think I’m the one you need.”

  To my surprise, he pulls the car over and turns to look at me with an expression that makes me hold my breath. He looks lost and vulnerable and he reaches out and grasps my hands, saying anxiously, “Please, Nelly, don’t do this. I need you; it can only be you.”

  I whisper, “But why? You could have anyone. Is it because you know I don’t expect anything from you? I’m sure somebody like Emma would be more suitable and you have dated in the past. Who knows, if you give her another chance you may discover you were meant to be together all along.”

  He grabs my hands and says urgently, “Give me one more week to convince you. I want to prove to you that you’re the only one I can do this with. Please, Nelly?”

  Something about the look in his eyes makes me question everything. I’m not sure why but there’s more to this than meets the eye.

  I stare at him for a moment and then shake my head slowly. “OK, one more week. I’m not sure how you can change my mind but I should give you the chance at least.”

  I don’t miss the relief in his eyes as he reaches out and impulsively pulls me close. I think my heart almost stops as he strokes my hair and murmurs, “Thank you.”

  Well, this is odd. I am being clasped tightly to a guy that starred in my dreams on many occasions who is grateful that I didn’t just break up our fake relationship. I’m not going to lie though; it does feel nice having someone hold me close and I suppose that’s why I allow myself to relax into him and get carried away by the moment.

  Maybe I should pull back and high five him or something because this feels awkward. However, I don’t want to and just enjoy the moment and file it away in that memory box inside my head to call on in the future. Then he pulls back and stares in my eyes and says softly, “I don’t want you going anywhere. I want to get to know you and your family and you don’t get away with that so easily.”

  Rolling my eyes, I try to lighten the atmosphere. “You do remember who my parents are, Jack? You won’t be so keen when you’re facing your old headmaster across the dinner table.”

  His eyes soften and he says sweetly, “Actually, I’m looking forward to it.”

  I almost think he’s going to kiss me again but instead, he pulls away and starts up the engine. “Come on, I’ll drop you home. It’s been a long day and you probably can’t wait to get rid of me.”

  Feeling slightly disappointed that he didn’t kiss me, I say a little more loudly than I intended. “Yes, of course. Maybe we should call it a night.”

  Later, when I’m lying in bed reliving the evening, it does cross my mind - why me? Jack looked so worried when I told him I was pulling out. It’s only been a few days, surely he could find someone else.

  What’s so special about me?

  18

  The next few days are spent as I normally would spend them. Working and then heading home to spend the evening alone. I see Jack at odd times during the day, mainly if he brings me a coffee, for appearance’s sake, of course. Ken comes and says ‘hi’ and I’m glad to see a friendly face.

  “Hey honey, how’s trade?”

  I stare at him and try to put a brave face on. “Oh, fine. You know, things are always a little quiet this time of the year. I’m sure things will pick up soon.”

  He looks concerned. “You would tell me if you were struggling, wouldn’t you? I mean, I could always give you an extension on the rent deadline.”

  I smile gratefully, “It’s fine. I think I’ll be ok. I’ve been thinking about a side ven
ture for a while and just need time to set it up.”

  He looks interested. “What is it?”

  “Chocolate parties. You know, provide a chocolate fountain, favours, in fact, everything you need to make your party a little different.”

  He smiles with approval. “That sounds like a plan. It’s always good to have ideas in business. Don’t let the grass grow under your feet and all that. Anyway, I came here for a reason.”

  Something about the look in his eyes stops me in my tracks. He looks excited about something and I say in surprise, “What is it?”

  He grins widely, “I’m getting married.”

  I squeal and fling my arms around him and say happily, “Congratulations, I can’t believe it. When is the happy day?”

  He laughs. “We don’t want to hang around, so buy your best hat for some time next month.

  “What!”

  He grins. “Why wait? I’ve discovered a new lease of life and can’t wait to make Violet my wife.”

  I stare at him in shock. “I’m sorry, what did you say?”

  “I can’t wait to make Violet my wife.”

  “Who’s Violet?

  I stare at him in horror. “Where’s Patty?”

  He looks a little embarrassed and says in a small voice. “We’re not together anymore.”

  I sit down heavily on the seat behind my counter and say in confusion, “I think you should start at the beginning.”

  Before he can fill me in, the door chimes and I look up and see a glamorous woman who can’t be much older than I am. She is dressed fashionably and her make-up is perfect. She has long, dark, hair and is extremely stylish and she walks up to Ken and places her hand on his chest and purrs up at him. “There you are, darling. I thought I’d find you in here.”

  I stare at them in amazement as she presses her lips to his and says flirtatiously, “How’s my big, bad bear, you know, your baby bear is feeling a little hungry today.”

  He throws her a look I would rather not have witnessed and pulls her close and kisses her deeply. I feel really quite ill and cough discreetly.