Whispers from the Past

by Gail Chianese

  Colin hit the Internet icon and typed in “Santa Barbara Zoo,” not that he was interested, just out of curiosity. Roger Williams was slightly bigger in size, but the California zoo had more big cats and a different variety of species on property. As Animal Care Director he wouldn’t be in charge of just a select group either, but of all the residents. PJ had nailed it when he said more money and responsibility. It was exactly what Colin had dreamed of doing. It was also three thousand miles from Shay.

  Shay sat on the front steps of her house listening to the birds chirp and enjoying the sweet scent of lilacs. It was the first day in over a week that she hadn’t felt like a zombie, thanks largely in part to an amazing girls’ night out and some killer margaritas. The lull in today’s schedule helped too. They’d only had the staff’s kids to watch and everyone had been picked up by three, giving her time to come home and take a nap before Colin showed up for their date.

  Between spring break, a trip to the zoo down in New Jersey for him to check on a possible transfer, and a wedding at the inn over the past weekend that ran late into the evening, they hadn’t been able to get their schedules to mesh so they could meet up. They had texted multiples times a day and talked every night. Sharing little bits and pieces of their day was great and all, but she missed the man. She wanted to see his smile, feel his strong arms around her, and taste his warm, soft lips.

  Oh yeah, she had it bad.

  History was repeating itself all over again.

  She just hoped this version had a happier ending.

  The crunch of tires on gravel, followed by the slam of a car door, alerted her to Colin’s arrival. He sauntered up the walkway with the ease and casualness of a man without a care in the world. He looked delicious in jeans and a button-down shirt. Sunlight glinted off his dark hair showcasing coppery highlights that gave away his Scottish ancestry.

  Scots and Irish mixing, no wonder O’Malley had smacked him upside the head.

  A smile broke out as soon as he saw her, sending little whirlwinds through her stomach. She’d been like this on their first date, all giddy, unsure, impatient, and twisted up inside. The man did things to her that she couldn’t explain, but she knew she hadn’t met another that made her feel alive like Colin Mackay.

  “Hello, gorgeous.” He leaned into her space and kissed her once, twice, pulled back then muttered, “What the hell?” and went back for third. “You ready?”

  “I guess.” She laughed. “You never said where or what we’re doing, so I hope I’m dressed appropriately.”

  She stood and let him take in the turquoise halter dress with the high-low hem that showed a lot of leg and had a deep neckline but covered both girls. Based on his slack jaw and wide-eyed stare, she’d take the answer as a yes. “Come on, Romeo. You’re about to catch a fly.”

  Colin slid his hands around her waist and pulled her against his chest, which, since she was a step up from him, put her chest right at his eye level. “We could stay home instead?” he said.

  Home. She liked the sound of that coming from his lips, but no way. Not tonight. As much as she loved her cute cottage, she really needed a change of scenery.

  “Uh-uh. You promised a night out. Besides, naked Twister is more of a second date activity.”

  Colin stopped dead in his tracks, looked at her, then back at the house before scooping her up and heading for the door.

  “Babe, we’re way past date number two.”

  Shay smacked him playfully on the arm and shook her head no. “Doesn’t count. We’re starting with a clean slate. Which mean all past transgressions can’t be held against either of us and it means we’re not jumping in the sack right away. We’re going to take some time to get to know each other. . .at least for tonight.”

  “Fine, slow and easy tonight. Tomorrow, fast and furious like bunnies. Come on.”

  Together they ran, laughing and holding hands to his open-air Jeep. She tied her hair back and sat back to enjoy the ride. In minutes they were zipping through town and heading up the highway toward Providence.

  She didn’t know why she’d thrown on the brakes. Just a couple of days ago she’d been ready to jump the guy’s bones and here she was acting like she didn’t know anything about him.

  Deep down, in her heart and soul where it counted the most, she knew everything she needed to know. She still loved Colin. Had never really stopped.

  What she didn’t know was if he still loved her. Or was it simply lust?

  “I have a few ground rules for tonight,” Colin said over the roar of the engine and the wind whipping through them. “Rule number one: tonight, is about us, not the ghost of Whateverhisnameis O’Malley. Rule number two: You have to let go and have fun. No stressing, just enjoy.”

  She gave him a mock salute and snorted. “Aye, aye, me captain. Any more rules, like do I have to eat me peas before I can have dessert?”

  “Not if you’re a good girl.” He squeezed her hand before kissing her fingers that were intertwined with his.

  And just like that he made her forget one worry, making room for another.

  This is what she had imagined life would be like all those years ago. A job she loved and coming home to the man she loved. Jumping into the car and heading to wherever their hearts led them, trying new adventures, while standing by each other’s sides through all the trials and triumphs of life. It could still happen. She could live the dream.

  But first she’d need to convince Colin to do something he’d be very against.

  Lie.

  To Grammy of all people. She had to get him and his team to tell her they’d found no evidence of paranormal activity, to convince her O’Malley’s spirit had moved on and now it was time for her to live her life.

  Siobhan Doyle O’Malley might be nearing eighty but she had the mind, body and spirit of someone a good twenty years younger. Grammy always credited her excellent health to hearty Irish genes, which was why it pained Shay to see her living her life practically as a recluse. Grammy had returned home the night before filled with stories of all the fun she’d had with Shay’s parents, the people she’d met and how happy Shay’s parents were. Her eyes had sparkled, and the sweet lilt of her childhood home had graced her voice. Then in a heartbeat it had all changed.

  Grammy’s eyes had filled with tears and her voice choked on the words. Clearly, she was lonely and realized what all she’d been missing out on. If Shay could get her to lead a normal life, Gram might even have a chance at finding love again.

  The lady had always said, it was never too late.

  Of course, Gram had been referring to Shay’s love life and not her own, but what was good for one surely fit for the other. And she knew the right person, that good-looking Mr. Ortiz who lived a couple of houses over from her gram. He was single and a perfect match for Gram.

  But first, she’d have to convince Colin to do the one thing he hated…lie.

  “We’re here,” Colin called out as he parked the Jeep in front of a fifteen-foot tall fence and a sign with his name on it.

  “You’re taking me to the zoo?” She looked at him and saw the same hesitant excitement in his eyes when he’d taken his first zoo job.

  He’d just came home from work and told her he’d quit his job as a veterinarian and accepted a position as a zoologist’s assistant. Her jaw had dropped. She’d stuttered her congratulations. She had thought he’d lost his mind. With all those college loans to pay off at a fraction of the salary, would they be able to afford to eat, let alone pay rent? He’d assured her not to worry. She did, but he was so excited and happy, she didn’t care if they lived on boxed mac and cheese.

  “I’d like to show you where I work, what I do, if that’s okay?” he asked, shifting in his seat to face her. “You did say you wanted to get to know me. What better way than to see how I spend my day?”

  She narrowed her eyes, thinking about his words. What else did he have planned? “It’s perfect, but I’m not mucking out pens.”

  “They�
��re enclosures, and they’ve already been mucked out for the day.” He hopped out of the Jeep and ran around to help her down. “Come on, let me introduce you to my best girl.”

  His what? Her mind spun around the possibilities and with Colin the options were limitless. He could be referring to a human female ranging anywhere from seventy to five years old or he could be talking about a baboon.

  Within a few minutes they were through the employees’ entrance. Colin stopped long enough to talk with one of the employees before ushering her away.

  “Please just tell me we’re skipping the reptile house? I’d like to sleep tonight and not have nightmares.” Her whole body shivered with the thought.

  “I know a great way to keep those bad dreams at bay.” His smile told her exactly what his method was. Tempting, but she meant what she said about taking it sort of slow. Plus, they both had work in the morning and she needed to be firing on all cylinders to handle the kids.

  “What’s your area these days?” she asked, looking around at the empty park.

  “Since we’re a small zoo, we all work together, but my main charges are the cheetahs, snow leopards. a panther and the moon bear. We’ll start with the cheetahs, and then I’ll introduce you to my girl, Maliha.” He steered her to the left, where they passed the zebras and wildebeest before coming to cheetah enclosure.

  As they walked, he gave her the full history on the zoo, pointing out different plants. He told her that the zoo had originally opened in 1872 and was the country’s third oldest zoo.

  Colin rambled about the other animals they passed, such as the African elephant, the giraffes, and the red wolf who watched them walk by with pensive consideration. They stopped to watch the harbor seals play before Shay and Colin arrived at Leopard Rock. At the top of a giant boulder, which Colin explained was called a kopje, Shay spotted the white leopard.

  “How many are in there?”

  “Two. A male, Sabu and the female is Maliha.” The big cat lifted its head at Colin’s voice, gave them a look-over, and then went back to sleep. “Come on, let’s take a shortcut.”

  He took her by the hand and led her through a secret door in the side of the rock wall.

  “So cool. You have secret passageways.”

  He laughed and pulled her along as she tried to take in everything they passed. Mostly supplies for cleaning the enclosures. He led her out another door, around a short path that wouldn’t be visible to zoo guests, and in through another door. They stopped in the middle of an office-slash-storage-slash-workroom.

  “Welcome to my home-away-from-home.” Colin held out his hands and let her spin around to look at everything. There was one wall with a half dozen monitors on it, his desk with another computer, shelves full of stuff, brooms, mops, shovels, boots, two refrigerators, possibly a bar, and what looked like a kitchen island.

  “Hold cocktail parties for the cats here, do you?” She raised a questioning brow.

  “Nah, they’re all too young to drink yet. The team uses this area for staging, breaks, meetings, and storage.”

  “There are no windows. How do you stand it?” They’d only been inside a few minutes and she’d already felt the walls closing in.

  “By spending as little time as possible in here. Come one, let’s find out where our girl is hiding.” He flipped on a switch and the monitors came to life. “There. There she is.”

  Before Shay could say a word, Colin had her by the hand and out another door that took them around to the opposite side of the exhibit. “Look up there, in the tree. See her? That’s my girl, Maliha. We thought we were going to lose her last week.”

  Shay looked up to see a gorgeous, snow leopard staring down at them.

  “She’s beautiful.”

  Colin made some kind of weird noise and the cat jumped down, graceful as a housecat, and ambled over to the side fence where they stood. She gazed at Shay and then ignored her, rubbing up against the fence with her full attention on Colin who stuck his fingers through the fence to rub her ears.

  Shay clasped her hand over her mouth to keep from blurting out that he was crazy. Instead of whipping her head around and gnawing off his digits as Shay expected, the cat closed her eyes and made a chuffing sound.

  “Does that mean she’s happy?” Shay asked, still waiting for the live-action horror movie to begin before her.

  Colin laughed, gave one final scratch, and pulled his hand back. “Yes. Maliha was raised from birth with human handlers. While I wouldn’t do that with the others, she’s special. She’s more giant housecat than leopard.”

  “Uh, sweetie, now’s probably a good time to tell you I’m allergic to cats. Please don’t bring her home with you, okay?” Holy smokes. She could see it now. Wake up to see a seventy-pound cat staring you down in the morning? Hello heart attack.

  “Does that mean we can get a dog instead?” Colin pulled her in tight, wrapping his arms around her waist.

  Maliha growled and stalked away.

  “I think your best girl just vetoed your request or else she plans to eat Fido the moment you turn your back.”

  “You can’t possibly believe we’d name our first child Fido.” He took her hand and led her back to the walking path past the moon bear and camel enclosures. “I was thinking more like Duke, or Doofus, or Bobokins. Unless it’s a girl, then it has to be Rocki.”

  Her heart sped up, did a little dance and tumble at the thought of having kids with Colin. She didn’t care if it was a little boy with Colin’s big brown eyes and messy hair or a little girl who was the spitting image or her or vice versa, as long as they were healthy. They could bring them here to the zoo and their daddy could teach them all about the animals. Or she could take them to work with her at the inn. They could build sandcastles and play pirate and . . . Catching her breath, she slowed her thoughts down.

  “Isn’t it a little early to be planning our children’s names, when we haven’t even had sex yet?”

  “Babe, just say the word and I’m ready, willing and able to change the status quo on that fact.”

  She laughed. It was hard not to with Colin’s playful smile and hopeful eyes.

  They rounded a corner and stopped back in front of the cheetah enclosure, but try as she might, she couldn’t spot the feline anywhere.

  “How’s the new job going?” Colin asked out of the blue.

  “Good. Great actually. The kids are fabulous and fun. My boss is wonderful and gracious, as are the other staff members. The inn is beautiful. How many people can say they live in paradise?”

  “Is it everything you want?” He thought for a second. “I mean, what else do you want out of life? I remember at one time you wanted your own preschool. Is that still your goal?”

  Wow, he really had taken her words back at the house to heart. “It’s what I want for now, workwise. I moved to Camden Point to keep an eye on Gram and to keep her company, but the plan was never for me to live with her. I want her to have her own life and not be dependent on me, but to know I’m near if she does need me.”

  Shay wandered down the path, stopping to check out the various plaques, animals and birds. “The inn is great, for now. On most days the Kids Camp is enough for one person with just the staff’s kids, but throw in holidays or events like this past week and I can see the potential for a bigger program. One I’ll head up without the headache of trying to finance my own place and all the cost involved there. But I don’t know what kind of crowd they’ll get in winter.”

  Colin ran his fingers down the back of her arm and kissed the top of her shoulder before wrapping an arm around her middle. “Is that what’s holding you back from starting your own preschool, money?”

  Shay snorted. “Yes, and no. My student loans just got paid off. Not sure if I want to go back into debt already. Plus, I’m thirty.”

  “I’m aware. What does that have to do with achieving your goals?” He kissed the side of her neck.

  “Well.” She swallowed. “I might want to have Bobokins befor
e I’m, you know, too old to chase him down the street, and it wouldn’t be fair to him for me to be gone ten to twelve hours a day while he sits at home, waiting for me to return.”

  “Why not bring Bobokins to work with you?”

  “I’m not sure Tory would allow that. She’s paying me to take care of other people’s kids, not my . . . Bobokins.”

  “Don’t you want more than one?” He nibbled up to her ear.

  More of this? Yes, definitely. Wait, what were they talking about? She hesitated long enough for Colin to lean forward and look at her. Her mixed thoughts must have shown as he gave a soft chuckle and released her to take her hand and continue down the path.

  “You should have more than one. Bobokins will need a playmate.”

  She began to have her doubts that they were on the same page. Before she could form the question, he spun her around in front of another fence and pointed.

  “That’s Uno, a panther. He’s been here for almost two years after being rescued by Massachusetts Fish and Game and then sent to us. He’d been wounded in both the face and hindquarters with a shotgun.”

  Other than a quick glance in their direction, the golden cat ignored the two of them and continued to bat a giant ball around. But the look was long enough for Shay to see something wasn’t right with his eye.

  “What happened? Is he okay?” The panther stopped playing and looked in her direction. One of his eyes was bluish-white and the other socket was red and looked like the eye itself was missing.

  “He’s blind. Somehow, he survived for what we figure had to be about six weeks, probably on road kill, before he was found him. MFG got him to a specialty hospital and then to New England Wildlife Center, where he got the distinction of being their first panther patient.”

  “Ah, hence Uno.”

  “Yep. When he first got here, we kept him in a special enclosure where he could choose to stay inside or go out. At first, he preferred the indoor area, but then we noticed he started venturing outside. He’s done really well transitioning to life with his disability but he’ll never be able to be released.” Colin’s voice was filled with tenderness and sadness and a compassion that brought tears to her eyes.