Forever Claimed

by Shreffler, Betty

  Setting her mug down, she leans forward, a loose strand of gray hair falling in front of her face. With her cerulean blues, she looks deep into mine.

  “You’ve suffered more pain in your short time as Queen than any ruler I know, and yet here you are, still strong, still fighting, still determined to have a triumphant reign. Do not let go of that determination. Let the pain you’ve suffered be your fire.” Her hand squeezes mine. “Show everyone in this world your ferocity will not be broken.”

  Placing my empty mug on the table, I take her other hand in mine.

  “You always know what to say to soothe my heartache.” Showing my appreciation, I caress my fingers over her small, wrinkled hands. “I know the ugly memories of Belore’s abuse will lessen, but I admit, his cruelty has created a vulnerability in me I did not have before.”

  “How so?”

  “I knew being Queen would have its challenges, but I did not fathom the extent of dangers that surround me at all times. I’m constantly battling the actions of men who want to control me. I fear I’ll never be free to make the choices I want.”

  “What choices do you want?” Her brows knit inward, her stare attentive.

  “I want the freedom to reign as I see fit and to love freely without consequence.”

  “Marrying Ryker will surely give you the security in your reign you feel is missing.”

  “Unfortunately, it won’t. I love Ryker, but marrying him will take away my power. As soon as I belong to him, the world will see me as his Queen and his inferior. Anauka and Iowan would become his. Monarchs across the world would initiate business with him and expect all dealings to be done through him. I would lose my reign over both territories. I would become obsolete.” Releasing her hands, I lean back in the chair, my fingertip rubbing across my lip as I stare into the crackling flames in the fireplace. “I would serve no purpose other than to bear his children. That is not what I was raised for.” My gaze returns to her worried one. “I was raised to be the warrior Queen for one of the strongest territories in the world, and that is what I want to be.”

  Sitting back in her chair, she rubs her thumb over the other, revealing her unease.

  “Do you intend to end your engagement? If so, I fear what will become of you and Ryker. That man loves you with an indescribable passion. Losing you will surely hurt him.”

  “I don’t have an answer, Nina. When I believed Matheas was dead, my new future became clear. I understood what I had to do to save my people and my home, and in doing so, I fell in love with Ryker. In my heart, I hold the same passion for him. I do not want to live my life without him in it.” My chest tightens, and my hand goes to it as if it can stop the pain. “The thought alone is agonizing.” Wiping at a stray tear, I look into her troubled gaze. “You are only one of two people I can share this truth with. My heart is torn between Matheas, Ryker, and my duty as Queen.”

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  FIORA

  Standing on the balcony overlooking the stables and fields, I admire the view past them. The sun is rising, peeking out above the mountains, casting yellow into the dark blue and purple sky. A warm mug fills my hand, its steam swaying into the air. With everyone still asleep, I take this moment to be alone, to bask in nature’s beauty and let my mind and heart settle if only for a few minutes.

  Breathing in the fresh morning air, I close my eyes, remembering the last time I was here in this spot, choosing my own path. As fate would have it, I’ve returned to the same location, hopeful for a solution. My soul band vibrates, and I look at my wrist to see a call from Pollo.

  “Good morning, my Queen. I apologize for the early morning call, but I knew you would want the news.”

  “Yes, please.”

  “Matheas is awake, and he is well. All of his wounds have healed, leaving only superficial scars. He does not have any permanent damage from his injuries. He’ll be able to return to his service as your royal guard and advisor, should you choose to have him do so.”

  Sighing a breath of relief, I smile, my stomach fluttering at the knowledge he is safe and healthy.

  “Have Matheas remain in Anauka. I will be traveling home tomorrow. When I return, I have a new position to offer him. Until then, assign him to palace security.”

  “Understood. On another topic, the Global Journal has issued your public statement. Comments are coming in from the Anaukin people. There are mixed responses. Would you like to plan a public address for when you return?”

  “Yes. Plan my public address and the assembly of the Royal Faction for the same day. Before I attend both, I’d like to meet with you and my closest associates privately to discuss future plans.”

  “I’m pleased with the level of trust you instill in me, my Queen. It brings me great honor.”

  “You’re worthy of it, Pollo. You’ve been an invaluable asset to my reign thus far.”

  “Thank you, my Queen. Is there anything else you need?”

  “If you have not done so already, please prepare the Queen’s suite for my arrival. I would like all my mother’s furniture and belongings secured elsewhere so I can sort through them when time allows.”

  “I’m pleased to share we’ve already prepared the King’s and Queen’s suites. Your family’s belongings have been moved to your father’s new estate.”

  “Your constant diligence is appreciated. Is the palace finished being reconstructed?”

  “Yes, the northwest wing is repaired and undergoing interior construction and design.”

  “Excellent. I look forward to seeing you soon.”

  “As do I, my Queen.”

  Disconnecting, I return my attention to the horizon and its bright yellow-orange sky. The sun has risen and shines across the land, beginning a new day. The door behind me slides open, and Ryker enters the balcony, carrying his own mug of tea. Coming to me, he caresses a hand over my hair and down my back before kissing my cheek.

  “I missed you last night.”

  Stepping closer, I move into his opened arm and kiss him.

  “I didn’t want to wake you. I tossed and turned with little sleep last night.”

  “What’s on your mind?”

  “How important it is that I bring stability to Anauka and Iowan.”

  “When do you plan to return?”

  “I’ll travel tomorrow.”

  Becoming quiet, his muscles tense as he takes a slow drink of his tea.

  “That’s much sooner than I expected.”

  “I’m sorry to disappoint you. Unfortunately, I can’t stay longer, not when I’m needed in Anauka. Kellan informed me the Royal Faction is growing bolder in their governing. If I don’t return immediately, I risk losing the loyalty of my council and my people.”

  “I can return with you and give my support.”

  “As much as I’d like having your company, I would have little time to spend with you. I have much to do when I return, and I cannot ask you to ignore your own territory while I stabilize mine.”

  Placing two fingers under my chin, he looks me in the eyes, his gaze penetrating and full of emotion.

  “I don’t want to be separated.” His thumb rubs along my bottom lip, and my body tingles in response. “I just got you back.”

  Placing my hand over his, I turn his hand to kiss his palm.

  “The hardest part of being a ruler is the sacrifices that have to be made. What we want and what we have to do are often conflicting.”

  Exhaling, he briefly looks up at the sky, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallows.

  “Spoken like a wise monarch.”

  “It’s something my mother said to me, and now, I understand what she meant.”

  Putting his arm around me, he rubs along my arm. Together, we look out at the horizon, the weight of our emotions heavy in the air.

  “I will miss you every day we’re away from each other.” Saying the words ignites the feeling as if we’re already apart. Moisture fills my eyes as I look at him. Having to leave him is harder than I ex
pected.

  Kissing my head, his lips linger as he holds me tighter.

  “So will I.”

  A moment passes, then he twists his neck, adjusting it as if it’s sore.

  “I admit, I’m uncomfortable with who will be waiting for you when you return to Anauka.”

  Broaching the subject of Matheas bundles my nerves. Touching the charm on my necklace, I twist it in my fingers. With my silence, he sets his empty mug on the table and continues.

  “I know your love for him has not faded. That expectation is unrealistic of me, but I’m hopeful what you had will remain in the past and not interfere with the love we share.”

  “Ryker…” My face grows warm, my head dizzy. “It’s not that simple.”

  Placing my mug on the table, I walk to the railing, holding back tears.

  “Fiora”—my muscles twitch at his warm caress down my back—“tell me what you’re feeling. I need to know.”

  “You already know.” Looking at him is painful, but he deserves the respect and the truth. “I love both of you.”

  His hand drops to his side, his jaw twitching.

  “You’ll have to choose.” When my tears fall, he takes a step back, staring at me with fear in his eyes. “Have you… already chosen?”

  My head lowers, my eyes pinching closed. “No, I haven’t.”

  Coming to me, he encloses me in his arms, putting his lips to mine. The heat in our kiss passes between us, our mouths moving in unison, desperate to hold on to the familiar passion that detonates each time we kiss. Caressing my cheek, his emotion-filled eyes stare into mine.

  “Choose me, choose us.” His thumb caresses my lips, and they instinctively part for him, longing for the feel of his kiss. “Now that I know what life is like with you in it, I cannot bear to live life without you.”

  “I do choose you. I cannot let you go. I don’t want to let you go, but I cannot tell my heart to stop loving Matheas. What I feel for each of you, I feel equally.”

  Ryker drops his hand. Turning away from me, he rubs the back of his neck, his face growing red.

  “We cannot marry if part of you still wants another man.” Facing the railing, he grips it so hard his knuckles turn white. “You were right when you said Belore caused devastation in your life and now that devastation has bled into mine.”

  Coming forward, I place my hand on his shoulder. When he glances at me, I see the anguish in his eyes, and it rips my tattered heart into two halves I fear will never be whole.

  “What can I say, Fiora? You intend to return home where Matheas is waiting for you while I remain here wondering what will happen to our relationship. I can’t ask you to stay when I know you have a territory to rule, but I want to. I want everything we planned. I want you as my Queen, but I fear that dream is fading as we speak.”

  Unable to look at me, he stares at the horizon, his sorrow evident in his sunken shoulders and broken voice. Caressing my hand down his back, I lean my head against his shoulder, breathing in his intoxicating rich scent, making my words all the more difficult.

  “I don’t know if there is anything I can say to alleviate the ache in your heart because my own is torn and suffering alongside yours.”

  Turning to me, he raises my chin, his thumb wiping at a stray tear. Damp, dark eyes stare into mine with an indescribable sadness that seeps into my soul, threatening to smother me beneath the weight of it.

  “Until you decide where your heart belongs, we cannot continue our engagement. I need to know it’s me you want, at your side and in your bed, just as I want you.”

  Touching his hand, I lean into his touch as more tears spill over my cheeks.

  “Ryker—”

  Warm lips press to mine and are gone too quickly, leaving behind a painful yearning in my chest.

  “Stay with me. Say it’s me you want.”

  Beneath my chest, the painful pressure is stifling my breath. The lump in my throat cuts off any words my mouth tries to say. With my silence, Ryker’s hands lower, falling to his sides, the evidence of his own heartache dampening his eyes.

  “I love you, Fiora, and I always will even if I’m not the man you choose.”

  With sorrow filled eyes and heavy weighted steps, he leaves me on the balcony, watching him walk away, his head bowed. Dropping into the chair, I let the tears flow, their release the only comfort I have in this terrible situation. For several minutes, I let all my emotions out, crying until there are no more to shed. Collecting my composure, I wipe my tears and make the necessary calls.

  Kellan answers in his usual upbeat tone, but it changes the moment he hears mine.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “It’s time we return home. Please have our rover craft and my family prepared for departure.”

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  RYKER

  Kendrick paces back and forth in front of my desk, his chest puffed out, his arms crossed.

  “I can honestly say you are the most capable and accomplished King currently ruling a territory, yet you are an idiot when it comes to women.”

  He stops in front of my desk, staring me down.

  “You let her leave? I saw her for only a few minutes, and I knew in that short time, she’s confused and hurt. When she hugged me, she cried and asked that I take care of you. I think you’re an imbecile for not being willing to share her. If it were me, I would have already planned how to work out the dynamic. He’s there! You’re here! She can go back and forth.”

  Slamming my glass onto my desk, I rise from my chair and walk to the window. Looking out into the rain, I snigger at how the gray rumbling sky matches my mood.

  “What don’t you understand? I don’t want half of her love. I want all of her.” Crossing my arms, I turn to face him. “With Matheas around, I’ll worry her love for him is stronger, and in time, she’ll only want to be with him.”

  Kendrick clicks his tongue.

  “I already know the answer to the question you’re dwelling on. She’s not going to choose Matheas when she returns to Anauka because she wants both of you. He’ll be miserable too if he doesn’t accept she loves you, but knowing Matheas, he won’t fight it, not if it means losing her. Mark my words, your decision to let her leave is going to bite you in the ass.”

  Rolling my eyes, I return to my desk, pretending to begin work I won’t actually do. Not with how miserable I feel.

  “What makes you such an expert on the decisions Fiora will make?”

  “Because we’re alike. What she craves most in this world is freedom. She doesn’t like anyone to make choices for her or force her into making choices. She’s proven that time and again. Every man who has tried to force her hand has failed and will continue to fail. That woman is your perfect match. She’s as strong-willed as you are stubborn. And I’m confident I’m telling you what you already know.”

  Minimizing the digital screen in front of me, I scowl at him.

  “Why do you think I let her leave? I can’t force her to stay here. I can’t force her to choose me.” Coming out from behind the desk, I walk past him to the exit of my planning room.

  “Where are you going?”

  “To the combat training room. You coming?”

  “Of course, I am. I’m not finished convincing you what an idiot you are.”

  Hands wrapped for boxing, I step onto the mats, Kendrick positioning himself opposite of me. Raising my fists, I punch first, and Kendrick blocks.

  “You think I don’t understand her, but you’re wrong. I know she’s like you.” Kendrick throws a hook, and I angle my body, dodging his fist. “I know how much her freedom to choose means to her. I could’ve pushed harder, begged her to stay, made love to her, told her everything in my heart, but it wouldn’t change the truth—half her heart is with another man. Nothing I do will change that. If I continued to push for her to choose one of us, I know who her choice would be.”

  Kendrick tests me with a jab, cross, hook combo. Blocking and sidestepping, I avoid the hits.
>
  “You really believe she’d choose Matheas over you?”

  Belore’s words taunt me, replaying in my mind—She loves Matheas more and will always choose him over you. Releasing my frustration, I throw my fists one after the other. Kendrick backsteps, doing his best to dodge my hits. When I almost clock his jaw, I drop my arms and take a breath.

  “Before we knew Matheas was alive, our plans were suitable for her. We’d marry, she’d live in my palace, we’d rule Anauka and the Free territory together. At the time, the solution fit the problem. With Belore’s death and finding out Matheas is alive, everything changed. I can’t keep her bound to our arrangement. She doesn’t need me anymore, not when everything she wanted is available to her now.”

  “You think you had to let her go?” Brows tightening, Kendrick’s head cocks to the side.

  “Before me, she had a plan. She’d have Matheas at her side, and she’d rule her territory without the influence of a man. Now that she’s finally free to reign and be with Matheas, how can I expect her to choose me, to live here, to compromise her reign? He can protect her without territory obligations interfering. He can give her his love without politically affecting her reign. Why wouldn’t she choose him? He’s the better man for her, and he’s who she’s always wanted.”

  Saying the words twists the violent grip squeezing my heart. Letting Fiora leave is a decision I regret. Watching her rover craft ascend into the sky brought back the same pain as when Belore stole her from me. When I looked at her, I saw a future, a woman I could share it with, and the hope of happiness. Why do I continue to believe in something I can’t have? Every woman I love is ripped away from me before our future can even begin together. Why pretend Fiora would love me as much or more than Matheas? Asking her to only love me, to choose me, was the hope of a foolish man desperately in love.