Falling For Declan (Falling Book 8)

by Tracy Lorraine

  I get a message back almost instantly.

  You needed to sleep. See you soon.

  Well that doesn’t give away any of his true feelings either, and makes me wonder yet again if he actually has any true feelings when it comes to me. Letting out a large sigh, I get myself in the shower to start my day.

  I’ve just wrapped a towel around myself when I hear a knock at the front door. Bailey goes scrambling off to see who it is.

  My heart jumps into my throat when I think about it being Declan. Yes, I missed him, but suddenly I’m nervous to see him after my emotional breakdown last night. He didn’t need to witness that. I’ve kept everything to myself for a reason, but I have to admit I do feel better for having a good cry. I smile to myself as I replay my rendition of Rihanna last night. I actually did it. I got up and sang without crumbling.

  “Not expecting me?” Lilly asks when my smile drops slightly.

  “I wasn’t really expecting anyone. Come in.”

  “Liar,” she mutters behind me. “I brought pastries.”

  “Oh, yum. Let me just go and throw some clothes on and I’ll be with you.”

  “Late night?” she calls out as I climb the stairs.

  “Nothing you’d want me to share.”

  I hear her muttering about how it’s gross and how she doesn’t want any dirty details about her brother while I pull on a pair of shorts and a Dec’s Surf and Shack vest.

  “So things are good then?” she asks when I reappear.

  “I guess.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “Well…” I pause as I try to gather my thoughts so I don’t sound like a crazy person. “Yes, things are good,” I say with a wink while Lilly screws her face up. “But…I don’t know. What is all this? We go from being at each other’s throats all the time and driving each other crazy to…well—”

  “Still driving each other crazy?”

  “Yeah. How do I know this isn’t all one big joke?”

  “You really like him, don’t you?”

  “Yes,” I whisper after a second or two. “He’s going to break my heart, Lilly. I know that’s not what you want to hear because he’s your brother, but this is all going to end up one big disaster.”

  “How do you know that?”

  “Because it’s too good to be true.”

  “When you’ve found the one it usually feels that way. At least, that’s what happened to me, anyway.”

  “You think Dec’s the one?”

  “Don’t you?”

  I drop my head on to my arms. “I’ve no idea what the fuck I’m doing right now,” I admit quietly.

  “I think you’re enjoying yourself and falling in love in the meantime.”

  My head snaps up. “Falling in love?” I ask in shock. Lilly’s eyebrows rise and she just stares at me. “Falling in love,” I repeat as the idea settles in to my head. “Damn it.”

  Lilly just laughs at me as she takes a bite of her cinnamon swirl.

  “You still okay for this weekend?” she asks as she grabs her bag to leave.

  “This weekend?” I’ve no idea what she’s talking about.

  “Molly’s hen, remember? Weekend at the hotel, spa, champagne…” My blank stare must clue her in to the fact that she forgot to invite me. “Crap. Those bloody twins frazzle my brain. Any chance you can get the weekend off?”

  “I’ll see what I can do. I might have to blow the boss or something to get it approved.”

  “Ew. Nic, that’s gross.”

  “I’ll let you know later.”

  * * *

  The second I walk in the office, Dec is on his feet and striding towards me. His hand grabs onto the back of my neck and he pulls my lips to meet his. He kisses me like he hasn’t seen me in months, not hours.

  We’re both breathless when he pulls back. Questions fill my eyes but he doesn’t answer any of them, even though he must be able to read them. Instead he asks, “Are you feeling better?”

  “Yes. I’m sorry about last night.” I try to look away but his hand comes up to my cheek and stops me moving.

  “Don’t be. Thank you for trusting me with it.”

  I open my mouth to say something but no words come out. I guess I did trust him. As he stares into my eyes, I can’t help but feel like something’s changed between us. I already felt like whatever it is we have here is stronger after last night but this…this feels real.

  I clear my throat before telling him that I need to organise the weekend off. He looks kind of stunned that I might have plans, but I guess I shouldn't really be surprised—it’s not like I have some crazy social life here. After telling me it won’t be a problem, I give him a quick kiss before turning and walking out to start work.

  I’m almost at the bar when I hear him. “Nicole?”

  I spin around to find he’s right behind me and I crash into his chest. Both his hands come up to my hair before he dips down to kiss me once again. Everything surrounding us fades away and we may as well be alone in my bedroom instead of standing in the middle of a packed café at lunchtime.

  When he pulls back, he winks at me. “What? You wanted everyone to know. Now they do.” He gives me one last heart melting smile before he walks through the tables full of staring customers and out the front door like nothing happened.

  Once I come back to myself, I find that I’m the focus of attention for almost every person in here—staff and customers alike. I want to run and hide from their gazes but I’m stronger than that, so instead I walk behind the bar and grab a notepad to get to work taking orders.

  “You lucky bitch,” Emily says when I get to her.

  “I told you something was going on there,” Freya chips in. “Is he as good as everyone says he is?”

  It’s on the tip of my tongue to tell them that he is and then some, but at the last minute I remember he’s their boss and I’d only be feeding the gossip around this place.

  “I couldn’t possibly say.”

  “Oh, look at the smile on her face,” Emily points out. “He so is!”

  * * *

  Before I know it, it’s Friday morning and I’m getting ready to drop Bailey off with Dec so I can spend the weekend celebrating Molly’s hen. I can’t remember the last time I did something like this, forgot about the world and just enjoyed myself because I can. I’m so excited right now it’s not even funny. I’ve been up since the crack of dawn with a belly full of butterflies about my girly weekend. I was even up to say goodbye to Dec before he went surfing, which is unusual.

  It seems him sleeping here has become a bit of a habit. It’s kinda like he moved in the day I did, although none of his stuff is here. But to be fair, it’s not like I’ve really moved any stuff in, either. I still only have a bed for furniture. I do now have a fridge, freezer and a TV, but everything else won’t be delivered for a couple of weeks. I don’t really have any issue with us having to hang out on the bed—it’s convenient. However it does make me wonder why we never hang out at Dec’s place. He’s got a huge, fully furnished house sitting there, so why we’re always here is beyond me.

  Grabbing the bag I packed hours ago, I slip my shoes on and lock the door, and Bailey and I head off for our weekend away. It’s the first time anyone else has looked after him for more than a few hours, but I know he’ll be fine with Dec. I’m sure he’ll have a whale of a time spending a few days in the bachelor house with the lads.

  It’s still early when I pull up but he said he’d be here. Finding the front door open, I let myself in. There’s no one around so instead of calling out and waking anyone up, I quietly head up the stairs with Bailey hot on my tail.

  I get about halfway before I hear footsteps coming to meet me. My heart begins to race at the thought of seeing Dec, but when I look up it stops abruptly and falls into my stomach.

  Georgia elegantly descends the stairs in front of me. My disbelief must be written all over my face because she takes great delight in the wicked smile she gives me a
s she gets closer.

  My pulse picks up pace as my shock wears off slightly and my fury takes over. Unfortunately I’m still too dumbfounded to make my mouth work. Using this to her advantage, she leans into me and whispers, “He won’t have the energy for you, hun.”

  I grit my teeth as an anger I don’t think I’ve ever experienced slams into me.

  “Fuck you. He wouldn’t fucking touch you again,” I seethe through gritted teeth.

  “You wanna bet? Go on up, you’ll find him showering my scent off.”

  My hands shake with my need to reach out and slap her but there’s a part of me that’s devastated she’s right, that she’s not the one I need to be angry at right now. My concerns about all this being one big joke to Dec have been niggling away at me but I’ve been too swept away by him to really give the idea legs. But now, standing here in front of the woman he’s potentially still been sleeping with this whole time, I feel so stupid for putting my worries to one side.

  I think back to the night he got me to sing, and his words come back to me when I asked him not to see Georgia again. “Fine by me.” Now I think about his response, I realise it wasn’t all that certain.

  “Enjoy my sloppy seconds,” Georgia sings as she continues her descent.

  I’m desperate to run up the stairs, crash into Dec’s room and discover she’s wrong, but a huge part of me knows that isn’t what I’m going to find. I feel sick as I even consider what Georgia just said to be true. Everything’s been so perfect between us. Why did I think for even a second it was real? This is my life—nothing good happens to me.

  Images of the life I’ve built here for myself over the past few weeks run through my mind as I pull my feet up the stairs. I want to drag it out, put off the inevitable, but all too soon I’ve got my hand on his door handle, ready to find out the truth.

  I fling the door open to find his bedroom empty. The sick feeling in my stomach intensifies with each step I take towards his en suite. Before I get to the door, it opens and out strolls a naked Dec, rubbing his hair with a towel.

  The second he sees me stood there, a smile lights up his face. “Hey, baby.” He drops the towel and continues walking towards me.

  I grit my teeth and my hands clench at my sides in an attempt to stop me reaching out and slapping him.

  Both of his hands come up to cup my cheeks like everything is normal and I blow.

  “Don’t fucking touch me,” I seethe as I slap both his hands away.

  His eyes widen and his mouth drops in surprise. Nice fucking try, dickhead.

  “I fucking believed all your bullshit, arsehole. I fell for it. All of it. I’m so fucking stupid. I knew it was too good to be true. So fucking stupid…” I rub my palms across my face as I continue muttering to myself about the monumental mistake I made in falling for this prick.

  “Nicole, what the fuck are you talking about?”

  “You and her. Couldn’t keep your fucking hands off for a couple of days, could you? Fucking pathetic.”

  “I haven’t fucking done anything,” he pleads.

  “Fuck you, Declan. I didn’t want any of this, so you’ve actually done me a fucking favour.”

  I don’t give him chance to respond. Tugging at Bailey’s lead, I march from his room, slamming the door behind me. I run towards the car in fear that he’s going to chase me. I’m done with this. He will not get a second chance.

  I slam my foot down on the accelerator just as I see him pull the front door open, but I’m gone.

  I get to the end of the street before my anger morphs into great sobbing tears. “Fucking arsehole,” I shout into the car as I slap the steering wheel with my palms. “I fucking knew you didn’t want me.” The knowledge that I saw all this coming but still fell for him anyway takes some of the anger that should be towards him and turn it on myself. How could I have been so stupid? So naïve? He’s spent his entire life trying to piss me off, why would I think it would be any different now? Has this whole thing just been a plan to hurt me more than he already has?

  By the time I pull up outside Lilly’s, I’ve almost got myself under control. She spots me immediately and comes rushing out with her weekend bag in her hands. That is, until she see’s me.

  “What’s wrong?” she asks, dropping her bag halfway towards the car and running towards me. “I thought you were dropping Bailey with Dec.”

  “I was,” I whisper, trying not to allow my emotions to get the better of me again.

  “What happened?” She jumps in the passenger seat and turns to me. Her big blue eyes are full of concern.

  Biting down on my wobbling bottom lip, I try my best to keep it in, but the second Lilly says my name to get me to talk, it all erupts again.

  She reaches over and pulls me into a hug as I drag in some ragged breaths to try to calm down. “What has he done?” she whispers in my ear.

  “He’s still sleeping with her, Lills. He left mine this morning and went home to fuck her.” Lilly’s gasp of surprise doesn’t make me feel any better.

  “Are you sure? Dec’s not a cheater.” I understand he’s her brother and that she’ll do anything to protect him, but I don’t need to hear that kind of thing right now.

  “Yes. I’m sure. She was leaving as I was going to drop off Bailey, looking like she’d been fucked into next week. She told me he was showering and when I got to his room, he’d just got out. I didn’t want to believe her, but she was fucking right.”

  “I’m going to fucking kill him.” Seeing Lilly get wound up makes this almost worth it. In all the years I’ve known her, I can count on one had the number of times she’s been truly angry. She pulls her phone and goes to unlock it.

  “No. Just leave it…please?”

  “But—”

  “No. You don’t need to get involved, and I don’t want it ruining this weekend.”

  “But—”

  “No, Lilly. I know you’re only trying to help, but I can manage.”

  She stares at me, her eyes begging for me to change my mind, but I stand my ground. I don’t need her fighting my battles for me.

  “Grab your stuff. I’ll drop you off at the hotel.”

  “You’re not coming?”

  “I can’t, I’ve got Bailey.”

  Lilly looks over her shoulder at my panting puppy sat on the back seat, and then back to me. The look on her face matches my mood. I was so looking forward to this, but he’s ruined it for me.

  “Lucas will have him,” she suddenly announces. “He’s already got the twins; surely it won’t make that much difference.”

  “No, I can’t do that to him. Honestly, it’s fine. You’ll have more fun without me after all this.”

  “No way. Wait here.”

  I watch as she runs back towards the house like a woman on a mission. Within minutes, she’s back looking much more like her usual self with a wide smile on her face.

  “He’s fine with it. Come on, get him out.”

  Something tells me Lucas did anything but agree to this, but I haven’t got the energy to fight about it. Lilly gets Bailey out of the car while I grab the stuff I packed for him.

  After telling a surprised looking Lucas everything he needs to know about a weekend with my overly excitable cockerpoo, Lilly drags me from the house as she tries to reassure me that it’ll be fine. “He runs a multimillion pound hotel chain, I’m sure he’s more than capable with two seven-month-olds and a puppy.”

  I love her enthusiasm but I can’t say I share her positivity.

  As planned we’re the first to the hotel. Lilly has a brief conversation with the receptionist before she hands over a pile of keys. As well as closing the wellbeing centre to all other guests for the weekend, it seems that Lucas has also booked out the entire top floor of the hotel for us. It’s not what you know, it’s who you know, as they say.

  “Come on, we’ve got stuff to do before they get here,” Lilly says, rushing over to the lifts.

  By the time a giant white limo pulls up o
utside the front of the hotel an hour later, Lilly and I have decorated not only the rooms we’re staying in but also the pool area. There are more inflatable penises floating around than I ever thought I’d see. Thank god Lucas isn’t here to see what we’ve done with the place!

  The excitement as everyone piles out of the limo is infectious, and I soon find myself forgetting about this morning and getting pulled into the merriment. When Molly emerges clutching two bottles of champagne, I understand why they’re quite so happy.

  “Nicole,” she cheers when she sees me. “It’s so good to see you!” Yes, she’s definitely drunk. She wraps her arms around my shoulders, hitting me with both bottles in the process.

  I quickly say hello to everyone I already know, and then Lilly introduces me to a couple of Molly’s friends before turning to Ryan’s two sisters. “This is Abbi and Liv. You’ll be sharing the suite with them and their mum, Karen.” I glance over to see where she’s pointing to find an older lady standing back from all the laughter and merriment. I’ve heard stories about her from Lilly, and I have to say that she’s exactly as I imagined her to be—kinda stuck up. Pushing my thoughts aside, I walk over and make an effort to include her in the group. She must feel a little left out seeing as Susan is the only other older lady, and she’s right in the thick of it, having known almost everyone here since they were born.

  We eventually make our way up to the rooms and agree to meet down at the pool in an hour. Other than dinner and spa treatments booked in all day tomorrow, we have nothing planned, and if I weren’t distracted by my heartache, I’d say it’s the perfect way to spend a weekend. As it is, all I really want to do is curl up on my non-existent sofa and eat ice cream while watching soppy films.

  “Are you okay?” Liv, Ryan’s youngest sister, asks when she finds me lost in my depressing thoughts in the living area of our suite.

  “Yeah. I’m sorry.” I do my best at plastering a genuine smile on my face but her grimace says I do a bad job of it.