The Rogue Agent

by Shiloh White

  “Uhh, yeah, yeah, I'll definitely do that.” I stammered to her, nodding so quickly, the hood of Halsey's jacket fell off my head.

  “You know I'm joking, right?” Halsey asked, placing her hand on my shoulder. Then she laughed, and I couldn't help but smile too. I started to take her hoodie off, but she grabbed the sleeve and stopped me. “Keep it,” she said.” It's a good piece of armor against Depression.”

  I was with her on that one. You couldn't go wrong with long sleeves and a hood.

  “Good piece of armor?” Scott asked. “What in the world are you talking about?” I opened my mouth to explain it to him, but I had no clue where to start. Halsey just shook her head at me.

  “He wouldn't understand anyway,” she assured me.

  “Fine, don't tell me,” Scott answered, mock-offended. “I'll be waiting over by the machine when you're ready.” Then he walked off toward one of the pods.

  “I really appreciate it,” I said, giving her another small hug. “Don't mention it. You can repay me by making sure you keep your sister safe,” Halsey said, stepping back to join Dart at the table.

  “Now that I can promise.” I said, giving her a wave. Then I went to join Scott by the TransPort pods.

  ✽✽✽

  I met Scott at one of the TransPort 2.0s, and he poked the side of it. The section he touched sunk in and turned green.

  On closer inspection of the white pod, I could see that there were a few buttons outlined right about where Scott touched it.

  All of a sudden, the front of the machine made a light rumbling sound and slid down, revealing the inside of the egg-shaped pod. I figured the button he pushed must have been 'open'.

  I looked up at Scott and he gestured for me to step inside. I walked in and saw a waist-high barstool jutting out from the ground, right in the middle of the pod. “Have a seat,” Scott suggested. I sat on the barstool and examined the inside a little closer.

  “It's roomy,” I concluded. It probably could have held both me and Chloe comfortably if there was another stool. After a moment of no response, I spoke up again, saying,

  “Thanks for—”

  “Oh, wait, I almost forgot something!” Scott said, cutting me off. He reached into his back pocket and pulled out a small yellow stick that I recognized as my paintbrush. “After Damian knocked me out; when I came to, I was holding it in my hand.” he explained. Then he put his hand on the back of his neck, and gave an awkward smile. “I don't know what happened to the others, though. Sorry about that”

  “No, no, it's fine,” I assured him. “The paintbrushes going missing were not your fault. Thank you for this,” I said, taking the paintbrush. “And for all of your help in saving Chloe.”

  “No big deal. It's what we do.” he said matter-of-factly. Then he took a step back until he was standing in the doorway. My eyes bounced around the white pod while I waited for him to say something. Although, I really didn't want him to bring up that infirmary incident, so part of me hoped he had nothing else to say.

  “You know, Dart might not have expressed it well, but he has a good point.” Scott said.

  “What do you mean?” I asked.

  “Well, you've seen that Chloe is safe, and you know now that Damian came after you and both of your siblings. So he definitely wants something with you.” I didn't admit it out loud, but Scott made a very good—and scary—point. Damian did come after all of us. And where I stood now, I didn't understand why. It could have stemmed from Disorder or just been Damian's craziness...

  Either way, I didn't want to get caught up in it again.

  “It could be a benefit to keep you here and train you,” he continued. “And we could help you conquer your last Zone after all.” Scott was being way more convincing than Dart had been. Despite his argument, being this close to home was at the forefront of my mind. After all, I had a new goal now...

  “It sounds good,” I told him, “but I need to be there for Chloe. I don't want to end up causing her problems like Lucas did for me. She's been through enough.”

  Scott nodded in understanding, but said nothing. I put my hand on his shoulder and said, “But you can bet I'll be taking on my Depression from that side. And besides,” I added, “it's not like you're going to stop keeping an eye out for me.”

  “Huh?” Scott asked, clueless. “What do you mean?”

  “You know,” I gestured at him with my hand, “your whole 'vow to protect people like your friend' thing. I'm related to your friend.” Scott tapped his face with his hand, and said, “Oh, right, of course. I'll keep an eye out for you. And your sister, of course.”

  “Real smooth, Scott,” Dart's voice echoed inside the TransPort.

  “He can hear us?” I asked Scott.

  “Yep,” Dart answered, “and we're waiting on you.” I looked down where his voice came from and saw a bunch of little holes grated into the ground. A speaker. Probably two-way.

  “Well if it's me you're waiting on, start it up.” I spoke into the grate with a laugh. Scott gave a chuckle and then stepped out of the doorway, walking back over to the table. Then the front pod started to slide up, slowly cutting off my view of the friends who helped save me more times than I could count. I waved to them just before the pod slid all the way up.

  I took a deep breath and everything was quiet in the white pod for a moment. Then Dart's voice crackled through the speaker on the ground. “Are you ready to go home?” he asked. My heart skipped a beat. “Yes.” I answered firmly. “Then remember,” Dart continued. “Think of your path, and then an entryway to Chloe's hospital room.”

  “I understand.” I said, trying to stay firm and focused. I put my hands on my knees and gripped them hard. “If you understand, then get a move on.” Dart said.

  I took a deep breath. There was a churning feeling in my stomach, just like when I sat in the other TransPort. But I wasn't scared. I was excited and anxious to finally see Chloe safe. I was about to close my eyes when Dart's voice crackled through the speaker again. “Wait,” he said. “There's one more thing.”

  “What is it?” I asked. A moment passed with no answer. Then the speaker crackled again.

  “An apology,” Dart said finally. I hope you'll forgive me for pushing you to enter your third Zone so quickly. After what you've been through, you deserve a break. Good luck back on your side of things.”

  “Thanks, Dart,” I said. Then the Lieutenant's words from the infirmary came to mind, and I chuckled quietly to myself.

  “You probably just need a nap,” I told him, closing my eyes before he had a chance to answer.

  52. I Get The Whole Truth

  As soon as I closed my eyes, I felt like I was floating out in open space.

  The stool felt as if it removed itself from underneath me, but I could kick my legs and move my arms like I was still sitting.

  “Dart?” I called out. The only response I got was my own voice echoing back at me. “Halsey? Scott?”

  No answer from the two of them, either. Was I stuck somewhere they couldn't hear me? I stretched my hand as far to the right as I could, but I couldn't feel the side of the TransPort. I started taking shorter breaths. I didn't want to admit it, but I was beginning to freak out. The next thing I knew, I opened my eyes.

  And the white walls of the pod were gone.

  In every direction I looked, darkness covered my sight. No matter which way I turned, it was black. I couldn't even see my hand in front of my face. My heart began to beat faster.

  No, I thought, there's no reason to lose it. I took a deep breath, trying to remember Dart's instructions. A path...For what it was worth, I closed my eyes again. Then I began to picture something; a sidewalk. Just like the one Chloe and I used to walk home from school on. And there were no Depression Agents to stop me on this walk.

  Suddenly, I felt something under my feet. I jumped, opening my eyes to see it. It was the sidewalk. It appeared—no, materialized, right under my feet, just like Dart said.

  I started
walking, picturing a door to Chloe's hospital room in front of me. Down the sidewalk, some of the darkness started to shimmer and bend until it formed a white door. On the front of the door was a small sign that said “Hale, C.,” just like the one in the hospital.

  With each step closer to the door, I got more excited. Chloe was this close, and she was okay. The hard stuff was over now; no more anxiety attacks that could actually kill me or crazy gang kids with the power to shoot me insane or...Anti-Lucy. And I couldn't help but chuckle at the fact that I'd survived not one, but two car crashes. One of which I caused on purpose. I definitely owed my survival of that crash to Lieutenant Hollister. But everyone helped save my life at least once. Even back in the Zone...

  I remembered Lucas stepping in front of me. How he kept a smile on his face when the knife flew at him. But even more than that, the image of his hurt face stuck out in my mind. How betrayed he looked when I told him I wouldn't go with him...My hand curled into a tight fist.

  That Disorder guy definitely messed Lucas up real bad. And Damian wanted to bring someone like that back? I couldn't let that happen. More than that, I couldn't let him take Chloe from me again—

  I didn't realize it at first, but I'd reached the door. This is it, I thought. My stomach felt like it was climbing into my throat. I slowly put my hand on the handle and started to open the door.

  “Wait.” A voice said behind me. I turned around, but there was nothing to see in the darkness but the sidewalk. The voice was so clear though...like it was right next to me.

  “It was me, by the way.” the voice said. I recognized it that time, and my heart wrenched. “Lucas?” I called out, but no answer came. I shuddered. I was imagining my dead brother? Scott must have been right; I definitely had Depression Zone trauma. I turned back towards the door, ready to get out of here.

  “Wait!” his voice said again. “It's really hard trying to reach you from here. Can you close your eyes?” he asked. I shut them tight, and everything around me was the same. Then I turned around, and standing in front of me was my brother.

  ✽✽✽

  “Lucas?” I gasped. “You're...” I couldn't find the words. Or maybe I just didn't want to. I didn't think I'd like the answer.

  He was just a few steps out of reach, floating on...nothing. I looked down at my feet and the sidewalk was gone. I was floating too! I peeked one eye open and let out a sigh. The sidewalk was still there. But the second I closed my eye, the sidewalk disappeared and Lucas was back. I wanted to go over to him, but I wasn't sure what would happen if I fell off of the sidewalk. I didn't trust myself to try to walk on it without being able to see it. Instead, I stood still with my eyes fixed on him, trying to understand how he was even here.

  “You said 'it was you',” I said. “What did you mean by that?”

  “Chloe.” he answered.

  “So then...” I said slowly, trying to connect the dots in my mind. “You were the one who woke her up?” Lucas nodded.

  “It was a...” he paused for a moment, like he was looking for the right word. “A fail-safe,” he decided. “Just in case, well...this happened.” he gestured to himself. At first, I didn't get what he was saying. His body looked normal to me; he wore the same black cloak with the hood pulled back behind his blond hair; his eyes were full and it seemed like he was all here. In fact, I saw no signs of him being dragged around by Disorder. The only strange thing was his body was outlined with a thin layer of gray fog.

  Then I realized what he meant. A fail-safe.

  “So you're not...” I bit my tongue.

  “Alive?” he finished. I nodded. I didn't want to say it in the Depression Zone, and I didn't want to say it here. But I already knew the answer. “Well, Depression Agents aren't exactly alive by our standards anyway. Besides—...” All of a sudden, his voice trickled off and started to sound like a radio tuned to static. He kept talking, but I couldn't make out a word he said. Then his body began to shimmer; the fog got thicker around his body. I took a step forward, afraid he'd begin to disappear if I didn't do anything. But I started to lose my balance and stopped. “Lucas...”

  “-nyway, I'm fine for now.” Lucas said, his voice coming back to normal. I wasn't sure what else he said, but that part alone was enough to feel like a weight off my shoulders. “But I can't stay for long.”

  “What are you saying?” I asked. I got that he couldn't come back with me; Dad would think we were all crazy. And yet...

  “It would be amazing to go back with you,” he said, as if he could read my mind. “Even just to go and see Chloe. But it would blow my cover.” he explained.

  “Your…what?”

  “It works that Damian thinks I'm dead. He's not gonna stop plotting any time soon, so I'm gonna keep watch from this side. By the way, I'm sorry for everything that happened before; Disorder had a deeper hold on me than I thought.” he said.

  “I—” I stammered. I wanted to say something. To forgive him. But no words would come out. My brother was alive; standing right in front of me. But he was going to leave, and I had no idea when I'd see him again.

  “Don't worry, Lucy. You'll see me again; sooner than you think, in fact. But for now, we both need to hurry. I'm out of time, and you might want to think about getting a move on too.” he said, looking from side to side. I had no clue what he was looking for. And before I could ask what he was talking about, his body began to shimmer and the fog got thicker around him. My heart thumped in my chest as I watched him fade in and out of the darkness around him.

  “Say hi to Chloe for me...” he said with a small wave. Then his image faded away, leaving nothing but the fog.

  “Lucas!” I shouted and ran to where he stood, forgetting all about not being able to see the path. I reached out at the fog, but Lucas was gone. I opened my eyes, and the darkness began to shake around me. Lucas' words echoed in my head: '...you might want to think about getting a move on, too.'

  Down past where Lucas stood, the end of the sidewalk started to crumble. I turned and ran back towards the door, but the pieces started cracking apart and falling quicker until they were right beneath me. With each step, another chunk of the sidewalk fell away. I ran and reached for the door handle, deciding I'd had enough of the Dust for now. I pushed the door open and dove through right as the sidewalk crumbled under my feet.

  53. The Family Reunion I Always Wanted (And The One I Didn’t)

  I woke with a jump, and almost fell out of a chair.

  “What the?” I said. Just a minute ago, I was diving to safety. Now all of a sudden I was sitting?

  “Finally,” said a voice next to me. I looked up where the voice was coming from, and saw Chloe lying awake in her hospital bed. She was propped up, snacking on a cup of yogurt. “Any longer and people would start to think you were the one in the coma.” she said as a smile wriggled its way onto her face. I looked around and realized I was back in her hospital room, sitting across from her.

  “It worked...” I muttered to myself. “You know,” Chloe said, scooping another spoonful of yogurt into her mouth, “I'm not sure whether I missed you or food more. Cause, I mean—whoa!”

  I stopped her mid-sentence and tackled her with a hug.

  “I'm glad you're alright!” I said, squeezing her tight. “I am too, but in a minute I'm gonna start choking on my yogurt if you don't let go.” she said with a cough. “Sorry,” I said. “It's just...really good to see you awake.” I backed off and sat back down in the chair. “Wait a second.” I said, pointing at her spoon. “You can't choke on yogurt!”

  “Sure you can,” Chloe argued. She scooped at the last bits of the yogurt in the cup. “I would know.” she said matter-of-factly. I stifled a laugh. Chloe put the spoon in the yogurt cup and got ready to throw it in the trash can across the room, but she stopped herself.

  “Could you throw this away? I always miss the trash can.” she said, handing me the yogurt cup. I peeked over at the trash can, and saw about four other cups and spoons littering the groun
d.

  “Is that all they give you in here?” I asked, taking the cup out of her hand.

  “Pretty much,” she said. “But they're not bad, so I asked for extra.” I chuckled at her. I got up from my chair and tossed the cup and spoon away. Then I started throwing away the ones on the floor.

  “So what are these supposed to be?” Chloe asked.

  “What are what supposed to be?” I counter-asked, tossing the last of the yogurt cups away and turning to face her. “Oh, those.” I said. She was pointing at her left arm, down at the painting of the orange suns. Or rather, what was left of them.

  “Yeah, these,” Chloe teased, lifting her arm to see from a different angle. “What exactly—”

  “You were shivering the first night,” I said, cutting her off. “They were supposed to be suns, to keep you warm.” Chloe looked at me with a straight face, then down at her arm. When she looked back up at me, a giggle broke through her seriousness.

  “Sorry,” she said, “but what happened to them?” She showed me her arm, and a lump formed in my throat. I could see how the Depression Agent messed with the painting. Instead of three suns, it just looked like a big misshapen orange blob now. But Chloe didn't need to know about the Depression Agent or the Dust or any of that...

  “I probably just painted it all too close together,” I lied, swallowing the lump in my throat. Chloe immediately bent over to look at her arm. “Too close together...” she mumbled as she examined the paint more closely.

  That was Chloe when it came to my paint, though; my biggest fan and my biggest critic.

  As Chloe was bent over, I noticed something white hanging from her hair. A loose strand of string or something? I guessed she probably hadn't showered since she woke up. I reached up to pull it out of her hair, but it didn't come out. “Owowow, that's my hair!” Chloe exclaimed.

  My heart skipped a beat. I stopped tugging and ran my fingers back through the strand of hair, tracing it back to a whole streak of pale white hair. “Okay, you can stop touching my hair now,” Chloe said, pushing me back.