by Pua Ramona
I knew she was short but damn she’s so tiny. It’s starting to get a little too awkward with us both just standing here, so I keep my cool and ask “Are you okay?”
She swallows hard and looks up at me and says, “Yeah, I’m okay, bye.”
I step to the side a little so she can walk past me …. wait, did she just sniff me? I try not making it too obvious that I heard her because I don’t want to embarrass the gorgeous little button. Sure enough I’m right, she was definitely smelling me. I chuckle silently as I watch her walk back to the car with a little girl who was a mini version of her, only the little girl had hazel eyes instead of her mother’s brown ones. I make my way out to my truck and my phone starts ringing. I check the caller I.D and see that it’s Becca. I let it go to voicemail because I don’t want anything to stop the warm feeling I’ve got going on right now.
I’m pretty sure she didn’t recognize me at all. The last time I saw her was at the lake sitting by the water alone lost in her own world, crying. I wanted to stop and make sure she was okay, but then her phone rang so I continued on with my jog thinking she just needed time alone. The next day I met my best friend Reese at the gym, and he mentioned that she had left early that morning. I asked him why but all he told me was that he heard she left because Michael cheated on her with Becca, and the rest is history.
Now that she’s back home I feel like everything just got a lot more interesting. Nothing says drama like your old school crush returning to the same circle as your current girl, who just so happens to be the reason that she left them for. I hope she’s sticking around for a while so I can try and spend some time with her. Looks like shits going to get fucked up because Becca has been my go-to girl for the past few years when I need my dick wet, or someone to keep the other side of my bed warm. Honestly, I feel like a piece of shit for even thinking about Sina when I have Becca waiting for me at my place. But… it's Sina.
I sit here in my car, breathing deeply, whispering her name into the midnight breeze “Sina'' , hoping that she hears my heart crave for her. I lose myself in my thoughts about how different things might have been if I’d have spoken up about how I felt about her that day at the lake instead of walking by. My phone starts buzzing again, and I accept the call. Before I can say hello, all I can hear is Becca “Baby, are you on your way home yet?” Her voice is like a bucket of iced water over my soul and the hard-on that I was sporting just a few seconds ago is long gone. And in that moment, I know I’m fucked.
I wake up the next morning with a tiny hand stroking my already hard dick, which by the way ladies is because I needed to take a piss and nothing fucking else. But I’m pretty sure Becca thinks it’s all for her. I try getting out of bed but I don’t move fast enough, “Come on babe, you didn’t let me come last night, you said you were tired. You know how I get when I’m not fucked properly” Becca purrs from her side of the bed.
I stop her hand mid stroke “I’m not in the mood Becca, I have to take a piss.”
“Well, hurry up then come back so we can have our morning fuck before we head out to work”, she pouts as she writhes around in the sheets.
I ignore her whining and make my way to the bathroom so I can fucking take a piss. I turn to wash my hands and find Becca now sitting on the sink with her legs wide open rubbing on her clit. Trying not to get turned on is a battle I lose fairly quickly. Shit, Becca’s gorgeous and I know most guys around town wished it was their dick between her legs on the daily. But for me she’s just that type of woman you don’t take home to your mama.
“Eli, please fuck me, fuck me hard” she moans. Fuck. I make sure to spread her legs wider before I step between them. She leans in and kisses me as if I’m her last breath and she's fighting to stay alive, moaning when she feels my dick near her wet pussy. “Fuck me now Eli, I can’t wait anymore I need to come” she says through her demanding kisses.
Grabbing her hair with my left hand and holding on to her hip with my right, I look into her eyes and slam my dick right inside of her before she can say anything else. I fuck her the way she likes, thrusting in and out, trying to both fuck her “properly” and get her off fast so she can leave. I feel my balls tightening up and I piston into her harder.
“Oh fuck Baby, I’m going to come” she moans “Harder, Eli, harder.” I slide my hand from her hip and grasp her ass as I pull her off the sink a little, fucking her so hard that she tears into my back with her painted fingernails.
I lean down to her ear and whisper, “You better fucking come right now Becca” as I continue to thrust in and out of her hard. “You need to come ‘cause I’m ‘bout to fucking come all over you if you don’t”. I slam into her a few more times as she screams with her release and my mind conjures images of Sina’s beautiful face and I pull out, coming all over her stomach.
Neither of us move because we were waiting to catch our breaths and just as my heart beat starts to slow I hear her mumble into my shoulder ,“I love you, Eli.”
“Fuck” I say to myself as I pull out and take a couple of steps back. “Becca, I told you that I’m not ready to be in a committed relationship.”
“I know that Eli, I can’t help the way I feel”, she says as she pins me with a glare.
I turn away from her gaze with a sigh, “I need to take a shower and get ready for work, I'm not doing this with you now.”
“If you don’t want me, I know plenty of guys who would love to have me hanging on their arm” she snaps back at me as she stomps out of the bathroom.
See, the problem with Becca is that she knows she’s gorgeous and she knows she can have whoever she wants. But what she seems to not understand is that she isn’t the one I see myself marrying, or having kids with. Shit! My mama can’t stand her but she puts up with Becca because she loves me, and is still respectful when she’s around.
“Whatever Eli, I’m leaving. When you’re ready to make me your official girlfriend you know where to find me” she calls through from the bedroom trying to get a reaction out of me before she leaves. I care for her, but not the way she wants me to. I seriously need to get this shit figured out. The longer I keep Becca around, the more she’s going to think we’re going to be an official couple.
I forget about Becca and my mind is already back on the girl with brown eyes. I don’t know why, but just the thought of her somehow puts me at ease. And for the first time ever, I can feel my heart smile. What the hell am I thinking? I seriously need to get my ass kicked. I’m starting to sound like a damn girl.
I leave the house a few minutes early because I need to grab some coffee before I head to the job site. Reese and I used to volunteer for Hope Afloat when we were younger, so we stuck with it. We even went to college to get our degree in architecture. After we graduated, we decided to move back home and start our own construction business. So now we help where we can with Hope Afloat when they need homes building for families in need. We do pretty good now, it was slow when we first started, but business has been busy after our first job building ‘Pixies’ - a now very successful coffee/book shop that’s owned by Leila Stevens, who is also engaged to Reese (which I never saw coming.) They have been together for almost 6 years now and Reese finally proposed to her last year. I didn’t understand his feelings for Leila at first, but he once told me “You’ll know that she is your person when your heart feels empty every time she leaves, or when she’s not around, you just feel like you can’t breathe.” I hope one day I’ll know how it feels to experience that for myself, but what I do know is that I’m happy that Reese found his person and I’m glad it’s Leila.
We have known Leila since we were eight, we all hung out together growing up. She left for college and came back on a mission to own her own coffee shop and boy did she boss our asses around. She’s smart, funny, and turns into a crazy little thing when she’s pissed off, so her crazy fits Reese’s laid-back personality perfectly. They are meant to be together. I pull into my usual parking spot in front of Pixies and before I get out I get
a text message from Becca.
Becca: Hey babe, sorry about this morning. Just wanted to wish ya an awesome day. Miss ya already ;)
Me: It’s fine. Have a good day yourself.
Becca: xoxo
I close my text message and hear Leila calling out to me. “Are you going to stand out there with that ugly expression on your face, or are you coming in for breakfast, asshole?”
I look at her and give her the middle finger. “It’s too early for your mouth Lei,” I say while putting my phone in my pocket.
Before we walk inside, she steps in for a hug “Morning Eli, I already have your coffee and two muffins ready for you. Oh, and Reese said he’ll meet you at the jobsite. He mentioned something about helping Luka Peterson this morning.”
Holding the door open for her so she can walk in first, I follow behind her. “He’s helping Luka? Since when were Reese and Luka friends?”
Lei looks over her shoulder and says “Eli, are you jealous? ‘Cause you’re sounding more like Reese’s fiancé then I do.” She continues to walk to her office laughing
“Shut the fuck up Lei, I’m just saying that I didn’t know Reese knew the Peterson’s like that is all.” I step inside and sit across from Lei.
“Oh yeah about that, Luka helped Reese with his car and they were having random conversations. I guess Luka mentioned that him and his brothers were working on building a bookcase for their sister who I think is back for their family reunion. Her birthday is coming up and they wanted to do something nice for her since it’s her first time coming back home since she left eight years ago. So Reese offered to help them so that it’ll be ready before her birthday” she says. “If you ask me, I think it’s awesome that they’re doing that for her. I still feel bad that she was the only one who never knew about Becca” Lei says, giving me the evil eye.
I put my hands up to defend myself and said “Woah, that’s their past and it has nothing to do with me. That’s her fault for being so blind and not paying attention to her relationship, not my fault.”
Lei sits back and shakes her head at me.“I didn’t say it was your fault first of all, and why the hell are you getting all upset about it anyways? Are you defending Becca Eli? I will never understand what you see in her and why you’re even with her, but that’s your business not mine. Becca is nothing but trouble Eli, and you know damn well you deserve someone who has more than just her looks to offer you”
I sit there thinking about what Lei just said and run my hands down my face “I don’t know Lei; I care about Becca don’t get me wrong but I want something different you know? Something real. I want something like what you and Reese have but it feels like it's never gonna happen for me. Like the girls I see are gap fillers, the prequel to the real deal, I just have no fucking idea where to find her, or if I already have and I missed my chance.” My mind pictures Sina in Leila’s place and myself in Reese’s and it feels right.
Before Lei can begin to unpick the bullshit I just dropped on her, one of her employees knocks at the door. “Sorry Lei, there’s a woman upfront who’s looking for a book and she can’t find it in the stacks. So I wasn’t sure if I am supposed to have her order the book through us, or send her to another bookstore?”
“Thanks Tammy I’ll be out in a second and help her, just let the customer know that I’ll be with her in a moment” Lei tells Tammy. She looks back to me, “Before we head back out there, I want you to know that there’s someone that is just for you Eli, you just have to be patient and you have to get rid of Becca if you want the right person to see you. Now let’s go see about this customer.”
I follow Lei to the front, and I feel my phone vibrating in my pocket, I go to reach for it when I hear the most beautiful sound ever. “Hi, sorry to be such a bother but I was wondering if there’s a way I could order a book from here? Or would it be easier for me to just go to B&N?” she asked Lei. I forget about my phone and stop completely behind Lei with my heart beating so fast in my chest. I don’t think she sees me because she’s only looking at Lei which is bullshit. How can she not see me when I tower over Lei? Wait, is she ignoring me? I don’t know why but it pisses me the fuck off to think that she is purposely ignoring me. I step to the side of Lei and she still doesn’t acknowledge me, what the fuck? So I stand there listening to their book conversation instead.
“No way, you came to the right place girl” Lei tells her. Her smile, she still has that damn smile that could make a man worship the ground that she walks on. I try moving closer to the counter but Lei gives me this what-the-hell-are-you-doing look so I take a step back again. I hope I don’t look like a creep staring at her like a drooling dog.
I clear my throat and say “Good morning beautiful” and all she does is look at me and nod her fucking head. Is she serious? I hear Lei laughing under her breath, so I give her my shut-the-fuck-up-Lei-not-today look.
“Sina right?” I hear Lei asking. “I’m not sure if you remember me but I’m Leila, Leila Stevens? We went to junior and high school together?”
Sina squints her brown eyes and she smiles the most gorgeous smile and I feel my heart hurting. “Oh my goodness, yes I remember you. It has been a while, how have you been Leila?”
Lei walks around and gives Sina a hug “I’m doing great. How have you been? I haven’t seen you since we graduated high school.” Sina’s smile slowly turns into a little sad smile, and I know she’s remembering her past because her shoulders fell a little as well.
She takes a deep breath and says “Yeah, things didn’t work out here for me, so I left for college and ended up staying in New York.”
I figure Lei notices Sina starting to look uncomfortable so she changes the subject by saying “Well, I’m glad you came back and I see you love books?”
Sina’s face lights up, “Yes, I guess you can say that. I was heading to B&N’s but my brothers suggested I stop here first. Also ‘cause this place makes magical cupcakes and delicious coffee, their words not mine” she laughs. I swear I would give up anything to hear her laugh all day, something about this woman was stirring up feelings that I have never felt before, not even Becca, who by the way just walked into Pixies wearing the shortest dress ever. Fuck my life right now, just fuck my life.
“Hey Baby, I knew I’d find you here” Becca says. I watch Sina close her eyes as her whole body language morphs and shuts down.
Sina opens her eyes and looks at Lei saying,“You know what, it’s okay I’ll just go check out B&N maybe they have it there” , as she turns and heads for the exit.
Lei beats her there before she walks out the door. “Umm hell no. You, my sweet gorgeous customer, are going to come with me to my office so we can order that book for you” She grabs Sina by the hand I watch her lead her to the back office. Lei gives me an irritated look over her shoulder and says, “You can see your way out Eli.”
“Why is Leila such a bitch every time she sees me?” Becca moans next to me. I forgot she was even here.
I look at her and say “Don’t Becca. I told you she has her reasons and you’re not going to talk shit about her either so stop.”
She just rolls her eyes at me. “Anyways, was that Masina Peterson I just saw standing here in sweats and a big ugly sweater?” she spits out.
I stand there with a disappointed look on my face. “Don’t be a bitch Becca. You need to leave her alone. Do you fucking hear me?” I snap at her.
She looks at me as she snarks, “It isn’t my fault that Michael chose me over her boring ass. And it sure isn’t my fault that she fucking left town, so spare me the bullshit Eli.” I can’t believe the shit she’s saying, but I do know I need to end this shit between us pronto.
“I’ll see you later Becca” I call over my shoulder and I walk out to my car with my heart in my throat because I know right now, Sina isn’t going to waste her time with me after seeing Becca with me this morning. Fuck, this shit could not be happening right now I think to myself. I take a deep breath and drive my ass to work. It’s goin
g to be a long ass day.
Chapter Three
Sina
I follow Leila back to her office and I can’t believe how Becca Jones still looks the same, earth shatteringly beautiful on the outside. But she made my skin crawl. It made my insides sick just watching her talk to Eli lovingly, I would be a liar if I said that I wasn’t a little irritated that she was even here right now. I’ll never understand why Michael chose her over me. I mean, we’re the complete opposite. And it dawns on me, that if she’s with Eli right now then I wonder what happened to Michael. I know he tried asking my family about me, but from my understanding my sister and brothers scared his ass off. They never mentioned him after I left home, but I knew they saw him around. I was so lost in my thoughts that I don’t realize Leila is talking to me until I feel a warm hand on my tense shoulder.
I look at her and ask “What was that? I’m so sorry I kind of got lost in my head.”
“It’s alright girl, I was asking you how long are you in town for?” Leila says.
I sit down on one of the chairs and say “I’m, well we’re here for a couple of weeks then we’re heading back home after our family reunion.”
“You came with your boyfriend?” she asked.
I let out a little snort, “No, I haven’t dated since I left here. It’s just me and Emma, my daughter, she just turned eight a couple of months ago.” I don’t know why but I feel like I should have more of a story to tell, something exciting and a little less plain. I look up at Leila and I know instantly that Emma is news to her because her eyes grow wide.
She smiles and says “You don’t owe me or anyone else any kind of explanation Sina, that’s your story to tell. Not mine, and not anyone else’s” as she reaches over and grabs my hand. “I promise I won’t say anything if Emma isn’t common knowledge.”