by E M Courier
“Hey,” he tilts his head trying to meet her gaze that is plastered to the ground. “What is wrong?”
“Nothing,” she forces a smile but it doesn’t fool Alexander. Something is bothering her and not a lot is known to bother Olive. She’s always been a tough girl, rarely cries, it is always anger over sadness with her. Seeing her upset, he knows something isn’t right.
Peering into the kitchen, Liam and Kai aren’t on the phone but whispering to each other. From the looks of it they’re arguing.
“Is everything okay?” He knocks on the wood of the threshold entering the kitchen.
They straighten up and like their sister, force a smile. “Yes, everything is great.”
Alexander narrows his eyes. “You’re lying.”
“No,” Kai shakes his head. “I wanted pineapple on my pizza and Liam refused to order it.”
“That’s because it is disgusting, Kai,” Alexander knows that isn’t what they were arguing about. But decides to let it go, he’ll find out sooner or later. If it’s bad news, he doesn’t know if he wants to hear it so soon after his still on-going recovery.
Liam and Kia shake their heads laughing. Liam puts his hand on Alexander’s back leading him into the living room where they all sit down. “Are you excited to get back to work? Dad tells us you start next week.”
“Yeah,” Alexander shrugs. “I think it’ll be a welcoming distraction.”
Olive looks wary of his response.
“What?” he furrows his eyebrows.
“It’s just...maybe you should change offices. Have a new area for your new and improved self,” Olive offers.
“Is this because you think going back will bring back memories of Scarlett?”
They all stiffen at her name. “What? No.” They collectively say.
Is that why they are all acting so weird? Because of the whole situation with Scarlett. “Listen, I’m not going to seek her out or hire somebody to find her. I think it was the best decision to let her go. Wherever she is, she is probably happier without me.”
“You really think that?” Olive whispers.
“Is there something you guys aren’t telling me?”
“No,” Liam says sternly. “We’re just trying to be respectful of your healing process. We aren’t sure what subjects to bring up. We’re happy you’re moving forward, Alex.”
***
“Are you sure?” Scarlett asks Olive.
Olive is throwing things in boxes, completely emptying out one of her spare rooms. After an appointment with the doctor that told her the sex of the baby, Olive got way so excited she wanted to get started on designing a nursery. She’s thrilled to be an aunt and Scarlett is just happy that this baby will have a family. Even though Alexander isn’t in the picture, she hears things about him. Olive was reluctant to tell her anything, but after some begging, she told her that Alexander is healing nicely and slowly becoming the person he was before the trauma. He’s happier, she tells her.
It’s been a month that Alexander has been home from the grief treatment center and he still doesn’t know that she is still in the city let alone living with his sister. Scarlett has since healed from her own trauma, the nightmares still there but less frequent. Some days she still feels a pull in her heart that makes her long for Alexander. He’s moved on and he’s healing and she is happy for that, there is no way she is going to ruin his life by showing up. She doesn’t want to be his reminder for what he did.
She’s come to terms with raising this baby as a single mother. She isn’t doing this alone, not when Olive has already claimed dibs on being the godmother and the cool aunt. Kai and Liam are excited, too. They haven’t told them the news of the gender, but they’ve been placing bets amongst themselves. Kai bets it’s a boy, Liam thinks it’s a girl.
When Scarlett and Olive found out she was pregnant, Scarlett offered to move out understanding that Olive is young and probably doesn’t want her beautiful penthouses babified and probably will want her sleep and not have a crying newborn keep her up at all hours of the night. Olive was offended that Scarlett would think that, she told her that the past few months they have grown to feel like sisters. Best friends. Olive told her she could stay as long as she wanted and that she would help out taking her to doctors appointments, being her support system, and babysitting.
“Of course I’m sure, I wasn’t using this room anyways,” Olive hauls boxes into the hallway. “Besides, this room is closest to yours and when the baby cries, you won’t have to walk far.”
“Thank you again, for everything,” she pulls Olive into a hug. Her small bump pressing against Olive’s stomach.
Olive places her hand on Scarlett’s bump. She’s nearly squealing with excitement. “I’m so excited. Have you thought of any names. I have a few.”
“We just found out this morning, I haven’t even had time to process that I’m really having a--” a knock on the door interrupts her. “Sorry, I invited Jo over, I hope you don’t mind. I wanted to tell her the gender of this little one.”
“I’m glad you two are getting close again. Besides I like Jo, you should invite her over more often.”
Scarlett smiles, hand resting on her stomach as she walks to the front door. Her happy expression falls when she sees that the guest at their door isn’t Jo. Wide green eyes are staring back at her. Body frozen and jaw dropped. Alexander is standing in front of her, speechless, just as she stands in front of him unmoving and trying to figure out if she is dreaming or not. Is it really him?
Nearly four months have made a world of difference for Alexander. He no longer has haunted, dark eyes, but his eyes are lively shining with motivation and aspirations. When she first met him, he was all suit, dressed to perfection, hair perfectly in place, and a serious expression to match. Now he seems more casual, less serious and more vibrant.
“Scarlett?” He breathes out, eyes roaming down her body.
“Alexander? What are you doing here?”
“I could ask the same thing.”
She opens her mouth to tell him she lives there, but quickly shuts her mouth. “I’ll go get Olive.”
“Wait,” he reaches out and grabs her wrist. They both look down at where he is touching her, he drops her arm and apologizes. “It’s been so long a-and there is something I’ve been wanting to say to you.”
“You don't have to.”
“I’m sorry for the pain I caused you. I really am.”
“Thank you,” she nods her head. There is so much she wants to say to him. Her entire body is screaming for him, it’s like a gravitational pull pulling her toward him. She has to break free of the trance. Closing her eyes, she turns on her heel and rushes into the soon-to-be nursery where Olive is.
“Alexander is here.”
“What!?” She stands up quickly. “Oh my god, Scarlett I’m so sorry, I had no idea that he was coming over.”
Olive rushes into the foyer of the penthouse where Alexander is waiting. Scarlett trails behind hiding in the hallways enough to eavesdrop but not enough to be seen.
“Alexander! What the hell? You can’t call before you come over?”
“What is she doing here?”
“None of your business. Next time you want to just show up, call. Now what is it you want?”
“You left your glasses at my apartment from last night. I figured you would need them to see, sorry.” Alexander lets out a sigh. “Olive, can I please talk to her?”
“That is not up to you, it is up to Scarlett,” Olive says with attitude. Stepping out of the hall, his eyes catch hers and Olive turns around, frowning, “You don’t have to, I can tell him to leave.”
“It’s fine.”
She always knew one day she would see Alexander again. It is hard to keep a baby a secret when almost all of Alexander’s siblings are invested in the baby. Eventually he would get suspicious if his brother’s were babysitting, or their apartments were filled with baby toys. Today isn’t exactly the right moment to tell him,
not while she is emotional and vulnerable and still helplessly and hopelessly in love with him. She thought the feeling would go away, but it didn’t. The only thing that calmed down was the intensity of what she feels for him. Seeing him again brings back so many memories and feelings and the burning desire is a destructive flame. She still loves him. She still wants him.
Olive leaves the room but there is no doubt that she is nearby listening in. Alexander stands there, soaking in the sight of her. Her eyes can’t help but roam over his body either, remembering what it looked like naked and what it felt like against her. “You look good,” Scarlett says speaking first.
“You, too,” he scratches nervously at the back of his neck. “I don’t know how many times I can say I’m sorry. I wasn’t right for a long time and I’m getting better, I’m focusing my mind on more positive things.”
“That’s good,” she shifts from foot to foot. “I’m glad.”
“You look beautiful,” he takes a step back to truly soak her in. She knows his stare is stuck on her stomach debating on whether or not to comment on her growing stomach.
“Thank you. How are things going? Olive tells me you’ve set goals for yourself.”
“I’m focusing on doing what makes me happy. I’m trying to find hobbies that keep me occupied and I’m actually looking for a new job. I’ve learned that I don’t exactly like being CEO of a company,” he chuckles. “What about you?”
“I have a lot to look forward to. Thoughts of the near future keep me busy as I prepare for a new transition,” she tries to be cryptic with her response.
“Good luck, Scarlett. I hope you’re happy and from the looks of it, you do seem happy. I hope whatever it is you’re looking forward to, is everything you expect and more,” he bows his head in a silent goodbye as he walks out of her life once again.
When the door shuts, Scarlett breaks down into tears, Olive rushes from the other room to grab her. “I’m so sorry,” she whispers. “If you never want to see again we can always--”
“It’s not that,” she wipes her eyes with the sleeve of her sweater. “It brought back so many good memories and I...I care for him but he’s moved on. He doesn’t want me back in his life, he wants to start over and focus on himself.”
“I’m confused,” she frowns. “You want Alexander in your life?”
“I thought as time passed I would realize that I never cared for him like I thought, but no one compares to him. I can’t stop picturing him in my dream, can’t stop thinking of him as part of my future, can’t stop hoping that he will be here to help me raise our baby. I think I’m in love with him, but I’m scared because I know I have to let him go.”
***
Olive decided to throw Scarlett a big gender reveal party at her penthouse. They decided not to tell anyone, or rather Olive told Scarlett not to tell anyone. When Jo came over that day she saw Alexander two months ago, Olive roped her into helping plan the party. Alexander’s parents are in attendance, Liam and Kai are anxiously waiting still fighting over who is right about the gender. Then there is Jo and Tris who are already calling themselves aunt and uncle to the baby.
Scarlett isn’t feeling herself today. Lately she’s been upset, sleeping frequently, and skipping meals. Olive worked so hard on this party to try and get Scarlett excited and out of her depression. She didn’t really see a point in having a party, not when she already knows the gender. Olive and Jo tell her it’s for the rest of the family. Seeing them excited will make her excited too, she doubts that but maybe it’ll work.
The inside of the cake is the color of the gender. Blue for a boy, pink for a girl. Olive hands Scarlett a knife to cut the first piece as everyone gathers around. She is shaking as she brings the knife toward the cake, she hasn’t had a migraine in a while, but she could feel one coming on. Liam walks over and grabs her hand and guides in down to the cake, helping her cut. Her breathing goes uneven as she looks up at Liam smiling, he looks like a proud father--uncle. Her heart shatters in half, she wishes Alexander were here to share in the joy.
Pulling her hand out of Liam’s grip and dropping the knife, she runs out of the kitchen crying. Liam runs after her along with Olive. She drops to her knees crying, her head spinning. They fall to her side, rubbing her back and telling her everything is going to be okay, but nothing feels like it is going to be okay. She is keeping her child from its father. He doesn’t even know he is going to be a father. This all feels wrong. She didn’t want to need him, but she needs him. She wants him so bad that she can barely function, can barely have a single thought that isn’t him.
“We’re here for you,” Liam pets her hair. “Tell us what you want us to do.”
***
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Alexander decided to go back to school to be a lawyer. He’s been busy taking care of loose ends at work before he quits for good, and online classes. He enjoys the classes and studying law, it keeps him busy as well as his mind. Not to mention the goal of becoming a lawyer is motivational, giving him purpose to live. Before he just went through the motions of life, now he’s experiencing it and enjoying it.
With nothing to do on a Friday night, he decided to read one of his law books and get a case study paper done. The November weather in New York is cold enough for him to turn on the electric fireplace in his penthouse. Curling up on his couch with a blanket and his book, he feels a sense of peace.
Barely three pages in, his cell phone rings. At first he was going to ignore it, knowing his siblings and parents are all busy today. Taking a quick glance he sees Liam’s name on his caller ID. “Hello?” he answers.
“I need you to come to Olive’s apartment.”
“Why? What’s wrong?” He sets his book down on the coffee table. “Is Olive okay?”
“Olive is fine.”
Alexander pauses for a heartbeat before asking, “Scarlett?”
“She needs you,” the words make his heart swell bringing back old feelings that scare him.
“No, she doesn’t. She has a life without me. Even you said it, she’s better off without me in her life.”
“I was wrong.”
“I can’t,” the words pain him to say. “I’m just starting to feel like myself again. If I go to her...I just can’t, Liam.”
“Yes, you can. You made a mistake. You never hurt Scarlett, the only way you hurt her, was by pushing her away and leaving her.”
“I tortured her father,” he says unamused.
“You weren’t yourself and her father was responsible for Ellie and Scarlett’s mother’s deaths. You never hurt Scarlett, she told us you never forced her to do anything. You never tortured her.”
“I’m afraid that if I go to her it’ll bring back bad memories, bring back the horrible side of me that tried to control her.”
“Did you love her?” Liam asks. His patience running thin.
Alexander doesn’t have to think much before saying, “I think I did.”
“You think?”
“Yes, I did love her.”
“Scarlett needs you.”
“It is common for a captive to fall in love with their captor--”
“Don’t give me that bullshit, Alexander. It’s been nearly six months. She can make up her own mind. She has had time to process everything and yet she still chooses you.”
“Chooses me?”
“Come to Olive’s,” Liam says before hanging up the phone.
Alexander stares at his phone and then at his law book. A decision to go back into the past or a decision to move forward and focus on new things. He is scared to be that man he acted like when he was with Scarlett. Even now just thinking about dominating her gives him a hard-on. He was a man with nothing to lose, he didn’t care, he wanted to feel some control over his life so he abused Scarlett, degrading her and controlling her to his every whim.
Alexander rubs at his face overthinking. Making a split-impulsive decision, he grabs his phone and car keys and drives to Olive’s apartment. He
curses himself the entire drive trying to tell justify his decision to go back to Scarlett. Maybe she just needs closure, he could give her that. The door is unlocked when he arrives, but the most startling thing is that his parents and siblings are all in the living room. Is this an intervention? Looking around some more he sees a cake a pink and blue decorations everywhere.
A party?
Liam stands from the couch and rushes over to him. “I’m so glad you came.”
“What’s going on?”
Liam grabs his arm and drags him down the hallway and into one of Olive’s spare bedrooms. In the room is Scarlett crying on Olive’s shoulder. Scarlett’s red eyes widen, tear filled and sad when she sees him. His heart breaks at the sight of her. Liam and Olive both leave the room to give them privacy. He strides over slowly and carefully, he sits on the edge of bed an arms length away from her.
“What are you doing here?” She sniffles.
“Hello to you, too,” he smiles and then frowns. Finally he acknowledges the white elephant in the room, “You’re pregnant.”
She cries harder. “Yes, I am.”
“This isn’t a good thing?” He tilts his head. “I didn’t know you had a boyfriend.”
Shooting him daggers with her eyes, “I don’t. It’s your baby, Alexander.”
“Mine? But...but you were on birth control when we…”
“I didn’t take them.”
Alexander stands angrily from the bed. “What do you mean you didn’t take them? You should have told me before--” he cuts himself off.
“Before you fucked me?”
He pinches the bridge of his nose. “It’s my baby.”
“Yes.”
Alexander sits back down next to her, this time close enough so their thighs are touching. They sit there in silence for what feels like forever. Being close to her makes him feel at home. He thought he would look at her and see Ellie or see Gavin. But he looks at her and he sees the girl that made him think of something other than revenge. He sees the girl who gave him a piece of her mind, body, and soul. The girl he could see his future with.
“What do you want me to do?” He asks softly.