by T. K. Leigh
“I know it doesn’t look like much, but the drinks are strong and the music is good. I promise.” Pressing his hand to the small of her back, he opened the door and steered her toward a table. She recognized three of the guys from surfing a few weeks earlier.
“Hey, Olivia! How’s your head?” Benny asked as Cam held a chair out for her.
“Better, thanks,” she said, smiling. “Please, call me Libby.”
“This is my girlfriend, Elsie,” Benny said. Olivia smiled across the table at a tall woman in her twenties with raven black hair and bright red lipstick.
“Are you going to play anything tonight?” Elsie asked Olivia cheerily.
“I hadn’t thought about it,” she replied. She was happy to get out of her house and meet some new people. If this was to be her new home, maybe setting down new roots would help her forget about her old ones. But she didn’t know if she could get on that stage and pour her heart out through music. The pain was still too raw.
“Libby used to go to 'Open Mic' night every week up north before she came here,” Cam said.
Olivia shot daggers in his direction.
“She even used to sing in a band.”
“That settles it then,” Chris said excitedly. “You’ve got to get up there.”
“Go put your name on the list,” Jason chimed in.
She looked around the table, noticing how different all the guys looked out of their wetsuits. They all had that typical surfer look…sandy hair, tan skin, and a sparkle in their eyes.
“If you don’t do it, I will,” Cam said. Olivia stared back, ready to kill him. “It will make you feel better, I promise,” he whispered before signaling a server. “What would you like to drink, sweetheart?”
The term of endearment sent shivers up her spine. She was eager to feel something for Cam again. Hell, maybe if she got up there and performed, he would finally cave and give her what she needed.
She smiled at him. “Well, if I’m getting up on that stage, I need something strong. Sapphire and tonic, easy on the tonic.”
“That’s my girl,” he replied as Olivia got out of her chair, walked up to the small table next to the stage, and wrote down her name on the sign-up sheet. There were only about five people in front of her so it wouldn’t be too long before it was her turn. She just hoped she had enough time to down a few drinks. A little liquid courage never hurt anyone.
Olivia returned to the table, thankful that her drink had arrived. “I ordered you a double, just in case,” Cam said, bringing his drink to his mouth. Olivia’s heart rate picked up a bit as she watched him lick his lips after tasting his whiskey.
“Thanks. I’m going to need it.” She looked around the bar, noting that it was starting to fill up. No one had begun to perform yet so she assumed Open Mic didn’t start until nine. She looked at the large stage, lit with just a few key lights casting low ambient light on the various guitars. There was a full-sized keyboard set into the shell of a baby grand piano, as well as a drum kit. As the bar filled up and the atmosphere buzzed with excitement, she actually started to look forward to performing.
After twenty minutes or so, an M.C. jumped onstage, warming up the crowd before announcing the first performer. Butterflies fluttered in Olivia’s stomach. Cam looked over at her, dropped his hand underneath the table and, finding Olivia’s, clutched it. “You’ll do great,” he said quietly, his breath warm on her neck. She held onto his hand, desperately wanting to feel something. Anything. But the spark that was there just a few minutes earlier was gone again.
After a few more performances, the M.C. walked back to the microphone stand. “Looks like we have a new one this week.” Everyone cheered enthusiastically. Olivia assumed the bar got a lot of repeat performances. “Miss Olivia Adler.”
“Good luck, Libby,” Cam whispered in her ear and Olivia felt a sliver of a tingle. Nothing like she felt when Alexander would whisper in her ear, but at least she felt something other than the dull pain. Maybe Cam was right. She needed to get back on stage and perform to help her rid herself of the hold Alexander still had over her. She desperately wanted to be free of him. As she walked up to the stage, she knew exactly what song she needed to sing.
Sitting down at the keyboard, she adjusted the microphone to her level. She played a short little chord, checking the feeling of the keys. “Thanks. This is Gravity by Sara Bareilles. Hope you enjoy it.”
She took a few breaths and began playing the opening lines, the melody slow and haunting. Cam sat on the edge of his seat watching her performance, her sweet voice cutting through the room, unable to mask her obvious pain.
As she sang, Olivia thought about the hold Alexander still possessed over her, causing her heart to ache from the loneliness of life without him. But it was a necessary self-imposed loneliness. It was almost Christmas and she had no one left with whom to celebrate the holidays. She pushed everyone away again, refusing to let anyone in. She hopelessly wished that her entire life was just a bad dream and that she would wake up in bed with Alexander any day. But she knew that wasn’t the case. He found her and begged her to go back to him, and she pushed him away. Again.
Benny elbowed Cam. “She’s good, man. Seems a little sad, but she’s rocking.” Cam simply nodded, staring at Olivia as she sang the first chorus, a hurt expression on her face while she pleaded to be set free. At that moment, Cam knew that something happened to her. Something recent. Maybe something to do with a man named Alexander, the name she murmured over and over again in her sleep that one night. Maybe he was the reason she left Boston and ended up on the little island. Nothing about her said that it was a planned move. Cam knew that she ran from something, but what? He told Olivia time and time again that he wouldn’t pry, but how could he really help her get past it if he didn’t know what it was?
Olivia continued singing as Cam scanned the room. Everyone was immersed in the performance. She definitely knew how to capture an audience. The emotion of the song was raw and real, and Cam was sure everyone in the audience could feel her pain. He could feel her pain. He wanted to take her pain away. He knew that if she begged him, he would crack. He didn’t want to, but the pain was unbearable. He could see it now.
As she sang the bridge, Olivia turned her eyes from the audience, staring out into the distance as if singing to someone far away, and Cam knew that she was. That song wasn’t meant for anyone in the room. The person the song was aimed at was in Boston. The song reached a fevered pitch and she belted out a desperate plea, the audience cheering wildly for the strength of Olivia’s voice ringing through the bar. She moved on to the last chorus, her voice soft once more.
Olivia closed her eyes as she played the final chord, a tear escaping when she thought about the hold that Alexander would probably always have on her. Almost immediately, the crowd erupted in cheers and applause. She opened her eyes and stood up, turning to look at the audience cheering madly for her. She took a slight bow and walked off the stage, heading in the direction of the restroom, needing a moment before returning to the table.
She was standing in front of the bathroom mirror, composing herself, when Elsie walked in.
“Hey. There you are. Cam was getting worried, but I told him you probably just went to the bathroom. You okay?”
Olivia looked down at Elsie. She was absolutely beautiful. There were some girls that made some extra pounds look attractive and she was one of them. She had such a bright personality.
“Yeah. Sorry. I just needed a minute before going back to the table.”
“Tough break-up, huh?” Elsie asked, leaning against the wall.
Olivia eyed her suspiciously. “How could you tell?”
She turned toward Olivia. “I’m a girl. We just know these things.” She angled her head, looking at Olivia as if she was trying to put a puzzle together. “That’s it!” Elsie shouted. “I knew you looked familiar. Duh!”
Olivia stared at her. “What do you mean?” she asked.
“You’re the girl who
used to date that rich guy up in Boston, right? Or who was rumored to be dating him anyway. Sorry. I’m obsessed with all those gossip magazines and shit. Your picture was in there a few times. Well, at least you look like her. I mean, there were only rumors and what not, but damn… Alexander Burnham. What a hottie! He’s the type of guy that you just look at and think, ‘Let me take your shirt off… And your pants’.” Elsie laughed.
Olivia just stood there, shocked, her eyes wide, unable to formulate any response.
“Oh, whatever,” Elsie continued. “Doesn’t matter. But you look like her. That girl he was rumored to date. Never knew her name, though. No one did, but I guess he’s dating someone else now. I was so distraught when I found that out. I was hoping to nab him next.” She winked.
Olivia continued to stare at her reflection in the mirror. What did she mean Alexander was seeing someone else? So soon? It hadn’t even been two weeks since he showed up on her doorstep, pleading with her. Was he already seeing someone back then?
“You must be thinking of someone else,” Olivia said, finally finding her voice, trying to talk past the lump that had begun to form in her throat. “It wasn’t me, whoever that girl was.” She walked out of the bathroom, wanting to be alone.
Making her way past the bar, she stole a quick glance at the table where Cam sat speaking animatedly with his friends, then walked out the front door into the brisk Florida night. She looked up and down the street, trying to figure out where she was. Once she had her bearings, she headed east, deciding to walk the roughly three miles back to her cottage.
“Hey. Where’s Olivia?” Cam asked when Elsie returned to the table several minutes after Olivia had stormed out of the ladies’ room.
“She left the bathroom,” Elsie replied, looking around the bar. “I thought she came back here. I hope she’s okay.”
“What did you say to her?” Cam growled.
“Hey,” Benny interrupted, glaring at his friend. “Back off, man. Elsie isn’t like that.”
Cam took a deep breath. “I know. Sorry. But where’d she go?”
“Well, I mean, we were talking about how stupid men are,” she replied, shooting Benny a glaring look as she feverishly typed something into her cell phone. “And then I saw her face in the light and it totally reminded me of that girl that was rumored to be dating that hot rich guy up in Boston. That Navy SEAL hottie who has, like, a gazillion dollars and his own private security firm.” The guys stared at her as she kept her eyes glued to her phone, looking for something. “Whatever. It’s a girl thing, I guess. He’s like the J.F.K., Jr. of the twenty-first century. He’s one of the most eligible bachelors in the country. He’s all over those gossip websites.”
“Because we read those,” Benny joked.
“Anyway,” she said, rolling her eyes, keeping them locked on her phone. “I told her she looked like that girl, but she didn’t say anything so I said it wasn’t her. Then I told her the hottie was dating someone else. Here.” She handed Cam the cell phone. “It looks like her so I wasn’t totally crazy.”
He looked at the photo. It had apparently been taken at a restaurant with a nautical theme. A fairly well-built man sat at the table, smiling at a beautiful woman, a dozen oysters sitting in front of them. The woman had dark hair and dark eyes. She was smiling a beautiful smile that lit up her entire being. “Damn it, Elsie,” Cam said, shoving the phone back into her hands and standing up from the table. “It didn’t look like her. It is her.”
He left the bar in a panic, running down the street and jumping in his car. He slowly drove down Atlantic Avenue, desperately looking for Olivia. Unless she found a cab, which was hard to do on the island, she would be walking.
After about five minutes, he finally spotted her. He slowed and pulled up beside her, lowering the window. “Olivia. Get in the car. I’ll drive you home.”
She didn’t even glance at him. “No, thank you. I could use a walk. Clear my head and all. I’ll be fine.”
Cam pulled the car along the side of the road. He quickly got out and sprinted toward her. “Hey,” he said, running in front of her, stopping her in her tracks. “Don’t be stupid. Let me give you a ride home. Something could happen to you. It’s not safe to walk at night.”
Olivia glared at him. “Why do you care?”
He sighed. This woman is exasperating, he thought. “Because that’s the kind of person I am, Libby. I care about people, and I want to make sure you get home safe. That’s all. I made you come out tonight, and you clearly did not enjoy yourself. So just let me drive you home.”
Olivia glared at him, not saying a word. Her feet were starting to ache. It wasn’t easy walking three miles in heels. “Fine. But the only reason I’m agreeing is because my feet hurt. I don’t need you to be my ‘white knight’, saving me. Got it?”
“Fine. Fine. You’re coming with me on your own terms. Got it.” Cam winked.
“I really hate you sometimes,” Olivia spat out, throwing open the door to the Lexus. Cam simply grinned at her. Something about her fiery spirit drew him in.
A few minutes later, he pulled up in front of Olivia’s cottage. He walked her to the front door and stood by her side as she unlocked it. She turned to face him, searching his compassionate silver eyes. “I’m sorry I walked out on you,” she said dryly.
He exhaled and looked down. “I know you’re going through some stuff.” He ran his hand through his hair, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. “And, well, I just want to say…” His eyes returned to hers, blazing, as he leaned in, his face inches from hers. “I’ll help you, Libby,” he said, his voice husky. “I’ll do whatever you want me to, as long as I never have to hear the pain in your voice that I heard tonight when you sang.”
A tear fell down her cheek, unable to hold it in anymore. “Will you make it stop hurting, Cam?” she pleaded. “I don’t want to feel anymore.” She stared into his eyes, willing herself to feel anything other than the pain. But nothing came. Just the same dull ache and emptiness that she had grown so accustomed to since Alexander showed up here.
He exhaled. “How do you want me to do that? I need you to tell me exactly what you…”
Olivia crushed her lips to his. He moaned as he walked her into the house and, closing the door, pushed her against it, his mouth never leaving hers. He grabbed her ass and lifted her legs, wrapping them around him, savoring the contact. He moved from her mouth down to her neck, both of their breathing heavy. He had remained strong for so long when, over the past few weeks, all he wanted to do was bury himself inside her to help her feel something again.
“Just take it away, Cam,” she said breathlessly. “Take away the pain.” Her legs found the ground as he grabbed her breasts through her dress and squeezed gently. Olivia threw her head back, moaning in pleasure, thankful to feel something other than emptiness and hurt.
She looked up into Cam's eyes. “Tell me what you want, Libby,” he growled, reminding her so much of Alexander. Except he wasn’t nearly as forceful.
He felt her body from her neck to her chest, her legs to her ass, and everything in between. Olivia panted. “I want to feel anything other than the pain, Cam. I want to feel something.”
“How do you want me to do that?” He crushed his lips to hers, pressing her to his body so she could feel his erection, wanting her to say exactly what she wanted.
Olivia felt as if she was having an out-of-body experience. She felt in total control of what was happening. It was like all those times that she sought comfort from so many other men. With Alexander, she felt as if she had no control. He held it all. But here, Olivia was sure that Cam would do whatever she wanted.
“I want you to fuck me, Cam. Fuck me and take it all away.” His eyes met hers as his hand disappeared underneath her dress, feeling the warmth between her legs.
She closed her eyes, moaning with pleasure as he caressed her through her underwear, thankful that he had finally lowered his guard. He slipped a finger inside her panties, toyi
ng with her clit. “Fuck. You’re so wet, Libby.”
She cried out, finally feeling something if only for a minute. Cam pressed his lips to hers as he continued torturing her with his fingers. He growled and ripped Olivia’s panties from her body, throwing them to the floor.
He reached into his pocket for a foil packet and tore it open as he unzipped his pants, pulling himself out. Olivia stared at him, the blank expression still on her face. She pulled his mouth to hers, not wanting to look at him. He pushed into her in one quick motion as he lifted her up, wrapping her legs around his body again.
“God, you’re so tight,” Cam grunted, thrusting into her. He set a punishing pace. Unlike the previous time they had sex, Cam was rough, pulling and biting on Olivia’s skin. It was almost as if he knew she needed that.
“Do you feel that, Libby?” he growled. “Am I taking the pain away by fucking you?” He hated what was going on. He almost felt as if he was taking advantage of her situation, but the pain in her voice was so real. So raw. And he would do anything to take it away, even for a brief moment. Plus, it wasn’t like he didn’t enjoy the feeling of being buried deep inside of her.
Olivia moaned. “Yes. Take it all away,” she panted breathlessly.
Cam groaned, biting her neck and pushing her even further against the wall. Olivia was immediately reminded of the day Alexander found her and tried to convince her to take him back. She closed her eyes tighter, wanting to forget that moment.
“Harder,” she breathed. Cam pumped into her with even more enthusiasm.
“No. Bite me harder.” The pain of his teeth on her neck distracted her from everything else. She needed the pain now, but it was an entirely different kind of pain. A pain she craved to dull all the other hurt she felt.
He bit down even harder, breathing rapidly against her skin.
Olivia screamed out, a mixture of pain and pleasure coursing through her body.
Cam released his hold on her neck. “You like that, Libby? You like it when I hurt you?” Beads of sweat fell from his forehead.