The Curious Dispatch of Daniel Costello

by Chris McDonald

  The door behind him creaked open and when he turned to the noise, he tried to hide his smirk as Adam emerged from their bedroom, dressed in shorts and a T-shirt, his suit discarded.

  Adam gave his friend a look that told him he didn’t want to hear any I told you so’s.

  ‘You were right,’ he said simply. ‘Now, time to start the case.’

  ‘Do you know who the last person to see Danny alive was?’ Colin asked, rising from his chair.

  ‘I have my suspicions.’

  Adam’s mind drifted to hazy memories of the night before.

  He’d watched from the bar as the argument in the shadows had played out, as Sam’s push floored Danny. He’d watched Danny trudge out, stopping only to whisper in the ear of a girl on the dancefloor. Adam couldn’t remember who.

  Twenty minutes later, Sam had left the room. To Adam’s eyes, it had seemed as if his best man had left a trail of breadcrumbs for him to follow. Sam hadn’t deviated to the dancefloor though, instead marching straight through the heavy doors into the corridor outside.

  ‘We start with Sam.’

  ‘You don’t think he could have killed Danny, do you?’

  Adam looked his friend in the eye.

  ‘Before this morning, I didn’t think any of our friends could be capable of murder. But a dead body says otherwise.’

  Sam was holed up in the bridal suite. When Adam knocked, Emily answered, a Cheshire cat smile plastered on her face, not managing to mask the worry behind it. Since their announcement at the bandstand, she’d changed into more casual attire.

  ‘Sorry that things aren’t going to plan,’ Adam said. ‘It must be a nightmare.’

  ‘Something to tell the grand kids, eh?’ she half laughed as she walked away from the door, back into the safety of the room. Adam didn’t know if this was an invitation to follow her or not, but luckily Sam’s appearance in the doorway meant he didn’t make a fool of himself.

  ‘Fancy a pint?’ Adam asked.

  Sam looked momentarily panicked, as if Adam had asked him to choose a drink with him over his wife-to-be. His alarm was short lived, as Emily reappeared and joked that taking Sam from under her feet would be brilliant, as she still had last minute bits and pieces to prepare for tomorrow.

  He kissed her goodbye on the cheek and the three of them made their way down the stairs towards the bar, engaged in idle chit chat, skirting around the headline.

  The barroom that the party had taken place in last night looked completely different in the cold light of day. The tables had been pushed back into place, covering over the sins committed on the dancefloor. The balloons and banners had all been taken down, returning the room to its original stately grace. A grandfather clock in the corner of the room served as a reminder that it wasn’t quite the afternoon yet.

  Oblivious to its warning, Adam ordered three pints while Colin and Sam chose a table. He watched them converse freely with a feeling of unease spreading in his stomach – were they really going to question their friend in relation to murder?

  With pints dished out, talk naturally turned to Danny. Generalities were explored first, before Adam’s gentle attempts at probing earned a raised eyebrow from the groom.

  ‘Look,’ Adam stated, baldly. ‘We think that, maybe, there’s something more to Danny’s death.’

  ‘Something more, how?’

  ‘Something suspicious.’

  Sam looked sceptical.

  Adam took up the mantle.

  ‘The police said Danny died from drinking too much. For one, he didn’t seem that drunk before he left here, and two, I’ve seen Danny drink enough to put me in a coma and still bag a girl at the end of a night out.’

  ‘So, you’re investigating?’

  Adam’s cheek reddened at the formality, and he saw Colin’s eyes dip to the floor.

  ‘We’re… asking some questions.’

  ‘You can’t think I’ve got anything to do with it,’ Sam scoffed. ‘He was my best friend – my best man.’

  ‘No, of course not,’ said Colin, disarmingly. ‘We just wanted to piece last night together - who had contact with him and things like that.’

  Sam took a sip from his pint and nodded while Adam searched for the best opening question.

  ‘Do you think anyone here would’ve wanted to harm Danny?’

  ‘Yes. You know him, how abrasive he can be. He rubs people up the wrong way constantly and is always having scraps with anyone fool enough to rise to his crap. But, I can’t see anyone killing him. He is…’ Sam faltered. ‘Was… annoying, but not to that extreme.’

  ‘I saw you two have a bit of an argument over there,’ said Adam, pointing to the corner of the room beyond the bar. ‘What was that about?’

  Sam looked as if he was vying for time, swilling the answer through his head before letting it escape his lips.

  ‘He was just being a dick,’ he said, finally. ‘He’d had a few pints in him, and a couple of shots – we all had – and he was just being his usual annoying self. He was slabbering on about the wedding, about how Emily was stealing me and how he’d probably never see me again after the vows. It was pissing me off, so I told him to shut his mouth and gave him a shove. He left in a huff.’

  ‘Did you see him again?’

  ‘Yeah. When he didn’t come back, I went looking for him to apologise. I went to his room and hammered at the door, but he wouldn’t let me in.’

  ‘So, you didn’t see him again?’

  ‘I’m getting to that,’ he replied, testily. ‘When he wouldn’t let me in, I went down to reception and asked for a key to his room. I explained the situation, and the guy gave me it. I went back, unlocked the door and he was lying on the bed, texting someone. I apologised and so did he, and I left again.’

  ‘Do you know who he was texting?’

  Sam shook his head.

  ‘Did he seem drunk to you?’ Colin asked.

  ‘No,’ Sam said, still shaking his head. ‘I mean, a bit. Not so drunk that he would’ve passed out.’

  ‘What did you do after you left?’

  ‘I went back to the party and stayed there until they stopped serving. I don’t remember getting back to my room.’

  ‘And the key?’

  ‘I gave it to Ross. When Danny didn’t come back to the party after our talk, I was going to go and see him again, to convince him to come back. Ross said not to bother, that he would go. I gave him the key and put the whole thing out of my mind.’

  Sam finished his pint and looked at his watch.

  ‘I best be getting back, I think. Emily will have a list of jobs the length of her arm for me. If you need anything else, give me a shout.’

  ‘One last question,’ Adam said, as Sam rose from his seat. ‘Do you know anyone who would want the wedding called off?’

  Sam looked aghast.

  ‘No,’ he said with a tone of finality. ‘We’ve only invited people who mean something to us and who we care for. No one here would wish us harm. At least, I hope they wouldn’t.’

  They watched him walk away, his shoulders slightly slumped.

  ‘It’s time we visit the twin with the key,’ Adam said, draining his glass.

  10

  A KICK IN THE BALEARICS

  Colin sank onto the bed while Adam remained standing, pacing to and fro in front of the window, the glorious sunshine filtering in, turning him into a silhouette.

  ‘What are you thinking?’ Colin asked.

  Adam stopped pacing. He mulled things over for a while, before sitting down on the end of the bed.

  ‘Well, for one, I think the story he told us about why he and Danny argued was nonsense. He was always so tolerant of Danny, always sticking up for him and calming others down when his mouth got him into trouble. For Sam to lose it with him, whatever he was saying to him must’ve been really bad.’

  ‘He looked put on the spot with that one too,’ Colin added, thinking back to the pause he took before answering that particular question.
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  ‘I agree. The rest of the answers flowed straight off his tongue, but this one he had to think about. We need to find out what the real reason was for his reaction to Danny.’

  ‘What about this key business?’

  ‘It checks out, I reckon,’ Adam said, ‘though it would be good to check with whoever was at reception, to confirm.’

  ‘Doesn’t that go against confidentiality? I don’t like the thought of someone snooping through my stuff.’

  ‘He probably only did it because it was the groom. I can’t imagine he’d go handing out keys willy-nilly. More than his job is worth.’

  Before Colin could reply, his attention was snatched by movement outside. He got up from the bed and crossed to the window, sitting on the seat built into the bay. It offered him a perfect view of the lawn.

  Crossing the recently cut grass was a girl. Her blonde hair appeared golden in the sunlight. She was wearing a pair of denim cut-off shorts and a bright, strappy vest top. From behind, it was difficult to make out who it was.

  Plotting her path, it wasn’t difficult to see where she was going. In the shade of the trees at the far end of the gardens was a swing seat, so far away the details of it were nigh on impossible to make out.

  One thing was easy to see, though.

  The lanky frame of the person sitting on it, watching the blonde advance towards him, was none other than Ross McMullan.

  The next person they needed to speak to.

  ‘I think you should lead the next one,’ Adam said, following Colin’s gaze.

  ‘Why?’

  ‘Well, we are a team. I led the first one and now it’s your turn.’

  ‘But, I don’t…’

  ‘Don’t know what you’re doing?’ Adam finished. ‘And I do? We’re leading a murder investigation from things we’ve learned from the television. None of this is normal.’

  ‘But you seem so confident.’

  ‘Confidence is a shroud that allows the bearer to wear many faces.’

  Colin looked impressed.

  ‘Who said that?’

  ‘I did, just then. Made it up. But it sounded impressive and that’s all we can do – say things that sound good and hope that it tricks people into telling us what we want to know.’

  Colin stood up and moved towards the door, ready.

  ‘You sure you don’t want to wear a suit for this?’ Adam joked. His laugh was cut short when he saw Colin’s narrowed eyes.

  They walked across the garden, kicking clumps of cut grass to each other like footballers warming up before a match. Colin realised that he was feeling nervous and tried to think of the main points of questioning that he and Adam had gone over as they’d made their way downstairs from their room.

  He wished he had a notebook to write things down in, but then, what they were doing was ridiculous enough already. The thought of pulling a notebook from his trouser pockets was a step too far.

  Upon seeing them progress towards him, Ross struggled out of the fabric seat and extended a hand which both men shook. Ross stood awkwardly, stuck between retaking his place in the swing seat and seeming childish, or standing like an adult should when a discussion was clearly on the horizon.

  In the end, he stood.

  He reached into the back pocket of his chino shorts and pulled out a packet of cigarettes, taking one out and flicking the box towards Adam and Ross like an invitation. Both declined.

  ‘I forgot you both gave up,’ mumbled Ross, through lips clamped tight against the stick of nicotine. ‘I don’t know how you do it.’

  Colin was appreciative of the slight gusts of wind that were playing with Ross’s lighter, causing it to flicker and extinguish just before fulfilling its purpose. It allowed him time to get his head right and size up his opponent.

  ‘Must be a bit weird, seeing your brother marry a girl you went out with once,’ Colin said, pleased with his opening gambit.

  ‘Not really. It was so long ago and we only went on a few dates,’ Sam countered, turning his attention back to his cigarette struggles.

  ‘It’s mad about Danny, isn’t it?’ Colin pressed on.

  ‘Crazy. I can’t believe it. Rumours are floating round that you two don’t buy what the police have said. I hear you’ve questioned the groom. Is that why you’re here talking to me? Am I under arrest?’

  Before Colin or Adam could answer, Ross laughed at his own joke.

  ‘Ask away. I think it’s a silly way to spend a Saturday and a complete waste of time, but we all like different things.’

  ‘We’d like to hear about the argument that you stopped last night between Danny and Sam. We’ve heard Sam’s version of it, but we’d like to hear yours too.’

  Ross arched an eyebrow.

  ‘Sam told you?’

  ‘Yeah,’ Colin said, surprised at how easily the lie slipped off his tongue.

  ‘Flip,’ Ross said. ‘I thought he was trying to keep that as secret as possible, but I guess you’re his friends. He can trust you.’

  He took one last puff on his cigarette before stubbing it out in the bucket of sand at the side of the swing. He sat down on the grass and motioned for Adam and Colin to follow suit. He cast a conspiratorial glance around the trees, as if they could be enemies eavesdropping in plain sight.

  ‘It’s true. Danny saw him cheat on Emily on his stag do. He’d been lording it over him since, threatening to tell people if Sam didn’t buy him a pint or drive him wherever he needed to go. Stupid little things, really.’

  He sighed deeply and took the packet of cigarettes out again, before reconsidering and throwing them onto the grass beside him instead, before continuing his story.

  ‘I was supposed to be best man, but it got changed to Danny shortly after we all came back from Ibiza. Sam told me the reason; about the girl and how Danny was blackmailing him into making him best man. He apologised and begged me not to make a big deal about it otherwise people would start asking questions and the truth would come out.’

  ‘And that’s what the argument was about?’ Colin asked.

  ‘Yeah,’ he said. ‘Danny was mouthing off again, and it was the straw that broke the camel’s back. Sam snapped and shoved him. Danny gave him a look as he was leaving that worried Sam, so he went after him not long after in a panic. He was worried that Danny was going to blab to anyone who would listen.’

  ‘Do you know what happened when he went to see him?’

  ‘He came back looking much calmer. He said he’d sorted it and that he’d go back later to check again. He put up a bit of fuss when I told him to enjoy his night and that I’d check in later instead.’

  ‘And did you?’

  He looked sheepish.

  ‘I was going to. Sam gave me the spare key to his room. I put it in my jacket pocket and then we all went on the dancefloor – the Macarena, ya know? Hard to resist.’

  They all nodded in agreement. The song seemed to possess some sort of gravitational pull towards the nearest dancefloor.

  ‘Anyway, when we were finished, I put my jacket on and went to Danny’s room. When I checked my pocket, the key wasn’t there.’

  ‘Someone had taken it?’

  He nodded.

  ‘And it’s still missing?’

  Another nod.

  ‘Did Danny let you in?’

  ‘No,’ he said. ‘I banged on the door, but he never answered. I could hear the TV was on, so I assumed he was in there, but I’ve just chatted to Vicky and apparently he paid her a visit last night.’

  ‘Vicky?’ Colin and Adam said in unison.

  Of course, the blonde they had observed walking across the grass earlier. Danny’s ex-girlfriend.

  ‘It might be worth having a chat with her,’ Ross said. ‘Big news there.’

  11

  EX’S AND OH’S

  Having discussed the upcoming football season and listened to Ross’s pessimistic views on Preston’s promotion chances, they left him to it. When they looked back, he’d settled back i
nto his swing seat with a fresh cigarette, sunglasses on and head tilted back. Presumably, once they were out of sight, he’d be texting around, warning people that a couple of amateur sleuths were in town.

  ‘Did you believe him?’ Colin asked.

  Adam nodded.

  ‘I think the fact that he told us the real reason behind the fight shows that we can trust him, even if it was taken by questionable means…’

  Colin glanced over at him, pleased to see that his impressed expression negated his words.

  ‘Very tricksy,’ Adam said. ‘Sadly, the chat raised more questions than answers.’

  ‘How so?’

  ‘Firstly, why did Sam lie about the reason behind the fight? Does he have something to hide? Secondly, Ross looked pretty miffed that he missed out on being his brother’s best man. Might he have had something to do with bumping off his competitor who took the title by means of blackmail? Finally, who has the room key? Whoever has that surely is the person behind the murder.’

  Colin looked jaded at how little they’d achieved so far. It felt like gardening – however many weeds you ripped from the ground, there were always more waiting to spring from the gaps you’d created.

  ‘The method of murder also remains a mystery,’ Adam added, piling more onto Colin’s already full plate. ‘He wasn’t battered to death, which means that it wasn’t a crime of passion – the police would’ve spotted any outward damage. Which means that whoever killed him had planned it, which very much rules Sam and Ross in.’

  ‘Both had means,’ Colin agreed. ‘One was being blackmailed on threat of a secret being exposed and the other was seeing his twin suffer, having had his best man title taken from him.’

  Frustration rose in the air between them.

  ‘The only way is forward,’ Adam said. ‘Let’s go see what Vicky’s breaking news is.’

  Vicky Watson was surprised to see the two men outside her door, but stood aside to let them in anyway, at Adam’s request. Having always had a slight crush on her, Colin kept his gaze low, focusing instead on the rough grain of the floorboards.