The Water-Babies

by Charles Kingsley

  CHAPTER VI

  HERE I come to the very saddest part of all my story. I know some peoplewill only laugh at it, and call it much ado about nothing. But I knowone man who would not; and he was an officer with a pair of graymoustaches as long as your arm, who said once in company that two of themost heartrending sights in the world, which moved him most to tears,which he would do anything to prevent or remedy, were a child over abroken toy and a child stealing sweets.

  The company did not laugh at him; his moustaches were too long and toogray for that: but, after he was gone, they called him sentimental andso forth, all but one dear little old Quaker lady with a soul as whiteas her cap, who was not, of course, generally partial to soldiers; andshe said very quietly, like a Quaker:

  "Friends, it is borne upon my mind that that is a truly brave man."

  Now you may fancy that Tom was quite good, when he had everything thathe could want or wish: but you would be very much mistaken. Being quitecomfortable is a very good thing; but it does not make people good.Indeed, it sometimes makes them naughty, as it made the people in theBible, who waxed fat and kicked, like horses overfed and underworked.And I am very sorry to say that this happened to little Tom. For he grewso fond of the sea-bullseyes and sea-lollipops that his foolish littlehead could think of nothing else: and he was always longing for more,and wondering when the strange lady would come again and give him some,and what she would give him, and how much, and whether she would givehim more than the others. And he thought of nothing but lollipops byday, and dreamt of nothing else by night--and what happened then?

  That he began to watch the lady to see where she kept the sweet things:and began hiding, and sneaking, and following her about, and pretendingto be looking the other way, or going after something else, till hefound out that she kept them in a beautiful mother-of-pearl cabinet awayin a deep crack of the rocks.

  And he longed to go to the cabinet, and yet he was afraid; and then helonged again, and was less afraid; and at last, by continual thinkingabout it, he longed so violently that he was not afraid at all. And onenight, when all the other children were asleep, and he could not sleepfor thinking of lollipops, he crept away among the rocks, and got to thecabinet, and behold! it was open.

  But, when he saw all the nice things inside, instead of being delighted,he was quite frightened, and wished he had never come there. And then hewould only touch them, and he did; and then he would only taste one, andhe did; and then he would only eat one, and he did; and then he wouldonly eat two, and then three, and so on; and then he was terrified lestshe should come and catch him, and began gobbling them down so fast thathe did not taste them, or have any pleasure in them; and then he feltsick, and would have only one more; and then only one more again; and soon till he had eaten them all up.

  And all the while, close behind him, stood Mrs. Bedonebyasyoudid.

  Some people may say, But why did she not keep her cupboard locked? Well,I know.--It may seem a very strange thing, but she never does keep hercupboard locked; every one may go and taste for themselves, and fareaccordingly. It is very odd, but so it is; and I am quite sure that sheknows best. Perhaps she wishes people to keep their fingers out of thefire, by having them burned.

  She took off her spectacles, because she did not like to see too much;and in her pity she arched up her eyebrows into her very hair, and hereyes grew so wide that they would have taken in all the sorrows of theworld, and filled with great big tears, as they too often did.

  But all she said was:

  "Ah, you poor little dear! you are just like all the rest."

  But she said it to herself, and Tom neither heard nor saw her. Now, youmust not fancy that she was sentimental at all. If you do, and thinkthat she is going to let off you, or me, or any human being when we dowrong, because she is too tender-hearted to punish us, then you willfind yourself very much mistaken, as many a man does every year andevery day.

  But what did the strange fairy do when she saw all her lollipops eaten?

  Did she fly at Tom, catch him by the scruff of the neck, hold him, howkhim, hump him, hurry him, hit him, poke him, pull him, pinch him, poundhim, put him in the corner, shake him, slap him, set him on a cold stoneto reconsider himself, and so forth?

  Not a bit. You may watch her at work if you know where to find her. Butyou will never see her do that. For, if she had, she knew quite well Tomwould have fought, and kicked, and bit, and said bad words, and turnedagain that moment into a naughty little heathen chimney-sweep, with hishand, like Ishmael's of old, against every man, and every man's handagainst him.

  Did she question him, hurry him, frighten him, threaten him, to make himconfess? Not a bit. You may see her, as I said, at her work often enoughif you know where to look for her: but you will never see her do that.For, if she had, she would have tempted him to tell lies in his fright;and that would have been worse for him, if possible, than even becominga heathen chimney-sweep again.

  No. She leaves that for anxious parents and teachers (lazy ones, somecall them), who, instead of giving children a fair trial, such as theywould expect and demand for themselves, force them by fright to confesstheir own faults--which is so cruel and unfair that no judge on thebench dare do it to the wickedest thief or murderer, for the goodBritish law forbids it--ay, and even punish them to make them confess,which is so detestable a crime that it is never committed now, save byInquisitors, and Kings of Naples, and a few other wretched people ofwhom the world is weary. And then they say, "We have trained up thechild in the way he should go, and when he grew up he has departed fromit. Why then did Solomon say that he would not depart from it?" Butperhaps the way of beating, and hurrying, and frightening, andquestioning, was not the way that the child should go; for it is noteven the way in which a colt should go if you want to break it in andmake it a quiet serviceable horse.

  Some folks may say, "Ah! but the Fairy does not need to do that if sheknows everything already." True. But, if she did not know, she would notsurely behave worse than a British judge and jury; and no more shouldparents and teachers either.

  So she just said nothing at all about the matter, not even when Tom camenext day with the rest for sweet things. He was horribly afraid ofcoming: but he was still more afraid of staying away, lest any oneshould suspect him. He was dreadfully afraid, too, lest there should beno sweets--as was to be expected, he having eaten them all--and lestthen the fairy should inquire who had taken them. But, behold! shepulled out just as many as ever, which astonished Tom, and frightenedhim still more.

  And, when the fairy looked him full in the face, he shook from head tofoot: however she gave him his share like the rest, and he thoughtwithin himself that she could not have found him out.

  But, when he put the sweets into his mouth, he hated the taste of them;and they made him so sick that he had to get away as fast as he could;and terribly sick he was, and very cross and unhappy, all the weekafter.

  Then, when next week came, he had his share again; and again the fairylooked him full in the face; but more sadly than she had ever looked.And he could not bear the sweets: but took them again in spite ofhimself.

  _Mrs. Bedonebyasyoudid_]

  And when Mrs. Doasyouwouldbedoneby came, he wanted to be cuddled likethe rest; but she said very seriously:

  "I should like to cuddle you; but I cannot, you are so horny andprickly."

  And Tom looked at himself: and he was all over prickles, just like asea-egg.

  Which was quite natural; for you must know and believe that people'ssouls make their bodies just as a snail makes its shell (I am notjoking, my little man; I am in serious, solemn earnest). And therefore,when Tom's soul grew all prickly with naughty tempers, his body couldnot help growing prickly too, so that nobody would cuddle him, or playwith him, or even like to look at him.

  What could Tom do now but go away and hide in a corner and cry? Fornobody would play with him, and he knew full well why.

  And he was so miserable all that week that when the ugly fairy came
andlooked at him once more full in the face, more seriously and sadly thanever, he could stand it no longer, and thrust the sweetmeats away,saying, "No, I don't want any: I can't bear them now," and then burstout crying, poor little man, and told Mrs. Bedonebyasyoudid every wordas it happened.

  He was horribly frightened when he had done so; for he expected her topunish him very severely. But, instead, she only took him up and kissedhim, which was not quite pleasant, for her chin was very bristly indeed;but he was so lonely-hearted, he thought that rough kissing was betterthan none.

  "I will forgive you, little man," she said. "I always forgive every onethe moment they tell me the truth of their own accord."

  "Then you will take away all these nasty prickles?"

  "That is a very different matter. You put them there yourself, and onlyyou can take them away."

  "But how can I do that?" asked Tom, crying afresh.

  "Well, I think it is time for you to go to school; so I shall fetch youa schoolmistress, who will teach you how to get rid of your prickles."And so she went away. Tom was frightened at the notion of aschoolmistress; for he thought she would certainly come with a birch-rodor a cane; but he comforted himself, at last, that she might besomething like the old woman in Vendale--which she was not in theleast; for, when the fairy brought her, she was the most beautifullittle girl that ever was seen, with long curls floating behind her likea golden cloud, and long robes floating all round her like a silver one.

  "There he is," said the fairy; "and you must teach him to be good,whether you like or not."

  "I know," said the little girl; but she did not seem quite to like, forshe put her finger in her mouth, and looked at Tom under her brows; andTom put his finger in his mouth, and looked at her under his brows, forhe was horribly ashamed of himself.

  The little girl seemed hardly to know how to begin; and perhaps shewould never have begun at all if poor Tom had not burst out crying, andbegged her to teach him to be good and help him to cure his prickles;and at that she grew so tender-hearted that she began teaching him asprettily as ever child was taught in the world.

  And what did the little girl teach Tom? She taught him, first, what youhave been taught ever since you said your first prayers at your mother'sknees; but she taught him much more simply. For the lessons in thatworld, my child, have no such hard words in them as the lessons in this,and therefore the water-babies like them better than you like yourlessons, and long to learn them more and more; and grown men cannotpuzzle nor quarrel over their meaning, as they do here on land; forthose lessons all rise clear and pure out of the everlasting ground ofall life and truth.

  So she taught Tom every day in the week; only on Sundays she always wentaway home, and the kind fairy took her place. And before she had taughtTom many Sundays, his prickles had vanished quite away, and his skin wassmooth and clean again.

  "Dear me!" said the little girl; "why, I know you now. You are the verysame little chimney-sweep who came into my bedroom."

  "Dear me!" cried Tom. "And I know you, too, now. You are the very littlewhite lady whom I saw in bed." And he jumped at her, and longed to hugand kiss her; but did not, remembering that she was a lady born; so heonly jumped round and round her till he was quite tired.

  And then they began telling each other all their story--how he had gotinto the water, and she had fallen over the rock; and how he had swumdown to the sea, and how she had flown out of the window; and how this,that, and the other, till it was all talked out: and then they bothbegan over again, and I can't say which of the two talked fastest.

  And then they set to work at their lessons again, and both liked them sowell that they went on well till seven full years were past and gone.

  You may fancy that Tom was quite content and happy all those sevenyears; but the truth is, he was not. He had always one thing on hismind, and that was--where little Ellie went, when she went home onSundays.

  To a very beautiful place, she said.

  But what was the beautiful place like, and where was it?

  Ah! that is just what she could not say. And it is strange, but true,that no one can say; and that those who have been oftenest in it, oreven nearest to it, can say least about it, and make people understandleast what it is like. There are a good many folks about theOther-end-of-Nowhere (where Tom went afterwards), who pretend to know itfrom north to south as well as if they had been penny postmen there;but, as they are safe at the Other-end-of-Nowhere, nine hundred andninety-nine million miles away, what they say cannot concern us.

  But the dear, sweet, loving, wise, good, self-sacrificing people, whoreally go there, can never tell you anything about it, save that it isthe most beautiful place in all the world; and, if you ask them more,they grow modest, and hold their peace, for fear of being laughed at;and quite right they are.

  So all that good little Ellie could say was, that it was worth all therest of the world put together. And of course that only made Tom themore anxious to go likewise.

  "Miss Ellie," he said at last, "I will know why I cannot go with youwhen you go home on Sundays, or I shall have no peace, and give you noneeither."

  "You must ask the fairies that."

  So when the fairy, Mrs. Bedonebyasyoudid, came next, Tom asked her.

  "Little boys who are only fit to play with sea-beasts cannot go there,"she said. "Those who go there must go first where they do not like, anddo what they do not like, and help somebody they do not like."

  "Why, did Ellie do that?"

  "Ask her."

  And Ellie blushed, and said, "Yes, Tom, I did not like coming here atfirst; I was so much happier at home, where it is always Sunday. And Iwas afraid of you, Tom, at first, because--because----"

  "Because I was all over prickles? But I am not prickly now, am I, MissEllie?"

  "No," said Ellie. "I like you very much now; and I like coming here,too."

  "And perhaps," said the fairy, "you will learn to like going where youdon't like, and helping some one that you don't like, as Ellie has."

  But Tom put his finger in his mouth, and hung his head down; for he didnot see that at all.

  So when Mrs. Doasyouwouldbedoneby came, Tom asked her; for he thought inhis little head, She is not so strict as her sister, and perhaps she maylet me off more easily.

  Ah, Tom, Tom, silly fellow! and yet I don't know why I should blame you,while so many grown people have got the very same notion in their heads.

  But, when they try it, they get just the same answer as Tom did. For,when he asked the second fairy, she told him just what the first did,and in the very same words.

  Tom was very unhappy at that. And, when Ellie went home on Sunday, hefretted and cried all day, and did not care to listen to the fairy'sstories about good children, though they were prettier than ever.Indeed, the more he overheard of them, the less he liked to listen,because they were all about children who did what they did not like, andtook trouble for other people, and worked to feed their little brothersand sisters instead of caring only for their play. And, when she beganto tell a story about a holy child in old times, who was martyred by theheathen because it would not worship idols, Tom could bear no more, andran away and hid among the rocks.

  And, when Ellie came back, he was shy with her, because he fancied shelooked down on him, and thought him a coward. And then he grew quitecross with her, because she was superior to him, and did what he couldnot do. And poor Ellie was quite surprised and sad; and at last Tomburst out crying; but he would not tell her what was really in his mind.

  And all the while he was eaten up with curiosity to know where Elliewent to; so that he began not to care for his playmates, or for thesea-palace or anything else. But perhaps that made matters all theeasier for him; for he grew so discontented with everything round himthat he did not care to stay, and did not care where he went.

  "Well," he said, at last, "I am so miserable here, I'll go; if only youwill go with me?"

  "Ah!" said Ellie, "I wish I might; but the worst of it is, that thefair
y says that you must go alone if you go at all. Now don't poke thatpoor crab about, Tom" (for he was feeling very naughty and mischievous),"or the fairy will have to punish you."

  Tom was very nearly saying, "I don't care if she does;" but he stoppedhimself in time.

  "I know what she wants me to do," he said, whining most dolefully. "Shewants me to go after that horrid old Grimes. I don't like him, that'scertain. And if I find him, he will turn me into a chimney-sweep again,I know. That's what I have been afraid of all along."

  "No, he won't--I know as much as that. Nobody can turn water-babies intosweeps, or hurt them at all, as long as they are good."

  "Ah," said naughty Tom, "I see what you want; you are persuading me allalong to go, because you are tired of me, and want to get rid of me."

  Little Ellie opened her eyes very wide at that, and they were allbrimming over with tears.

  "Oh, Tom, Tom!" she said, very mournfully--and then she cried, "Oh, Tom!where are you?"

  And Tom cried, "Oh, Ellie, where are you?"

  For neither of them could see each other--not the least. Little Ellievanished quite away, and Tom heard her voice calling him, and growingsmaller and smaller, and fainter and fainter, till all was silent.

  Who was frightened then but Tom? He swam up and down among the rocks,into all the halls and chambers, faster than ever he swam before, butcould not find her. He shouted after her, but she did not answer; heasked all the other children, but they had not seen her; and at last hewent up to the top of the water and began crying and screaming for Mrs.Bedonebyasyoudid--which perhaps was the best thing to do--for she camein a moment.

  "Oh!" said Tom. "Oh, dear, oh dear! I have been naughty to Ellie, and Ihave killed her--I know I have killed her."

  "Not quite that," said the fairy; "but I have sent her away home, andshe will not come back again for I do not know how long."

  And at that Tom cried so bitterly that the salt sea was swelled with histears, and the tide was 3,954,620,819 of an inch higher than it had beenthe day before: but perhaps that was owing to the waxing of the moon.

  "How cruel of you to send Ellie away!" sobbed Tom. "However, I will findher again, if I go to the world's end to look for her."

  The fairy did not slap Tom, and tell him to hold his tongue: but shetook him on her lap very kindly, just as her sister would have done; andput him in mind how it was not her fault, because she was wound upinside, like watches, and could not help doing things whether she likedor not. And then she told him how he had been in the nursery longenough, and must go out now and see the world, if he intended ever to bea man; and how he must go all alone by himself, as every one else thatever was born has to go, and see with his own eyes, and smell with hisown nose, and make his own bed and lie on it, and burn his own fingersif he put them into the fire. And then she told him how many fine thingsthere were to be seen in the world, and what an odd, curious, pleasant,orderly, respectable, well-managed, and, on the whole, successful (as,indeed, might have been expected) sort of a place it was, if peoplewould only be tolerably brave and honest and good in it; and then shetold him not to be afraid of anything he met, for nothing would harm himif he remembered all his lessons, and did what he knew was right. And atlast she comforted poor little Tom so much that he was quite eager togo, and wanted to set out that minute. "Only," he said, "if I might seeEllie once before I went!"

  "Why do you want that?"

  "Because--because I should be so much happier if I thought she hadforgiven me."

  And in the twinkling of an eye there stood Ellie, smiling, and lookingso happy that Tom longed to kiss her; but was still afraid it would notbe respectful, because she was a lady born.

  "I am going, Ellie!" said Tom. "I am going, if it is to the world's end.But I don't like going at all, and that's the truth."

  "Pooh! pooh! pooh!" said the fairy. "You will like it very well indeed,you little rogue, and you know that at the bottom of your heart. But ifyou don't, I will make you like it. Come here, and see what happens topeople who do only what is pleasant."

  And she took out of one of her cupboards (she had all sorts ofmysterious cupboards in the cracks of the rocks) the most wonderfulwaterproof book, full of such photographs as never were seen. For shehad found out photography (and this is a fact) more than 13,598,000years before anybody was born; and, what is more, her photographs didnot merely represent light and shade, as ours do, but color also, andall colors, as you may see if you look at a blackcock's tail, or abutterfly's wing, or indeed most things that are or can be, so to speak.And therefore her photographs were very curious and famous, and thechildren looked with great delight for the opening of the book.

  And on the title-page was written, "The History of the great and famousnation of the Doasyoulikes, who came away from the country of Hardwork,because they wanted to play on the Jews' harp all day long."

  In the first picture they saw these Doasyoulikes living in the land ofReadymade, at the foot of the Happy-go-lucky Mountains, where flapdoodlegrows wild; and if you want to know what that is, you must read PeterSimple.

  They lived very much such a life as those jolly old Greeks in Sicily,whom you may see painted on the ancient vases, and really there seemedto be great excuses for them, for they had no need to work.

  Instead of houses they lived in the beautiful caves of tufa, and bathedin the warm springs three times a day; and, as for clothes, it was sowarm there that the gentlemen walked about in little beside a cocked hatand a pair of straps, or some light summer tackle of that kind; and theladies all gathered gossamer in autumn (when they were not too lazy) tomake their winter dresses.

  They were very fond of music, but it was too much trouble to learn thepiano or the violin; and as for dancing, that would have been too greatan exertion. So they sat on ant-hills all day long, and played on theJews' harp; and, if the ants bit them, why they just got up and went tothe next ant-hill, till they were bitten there likewise.

  And they sat under the flapdoodle-trees, and let the flapdoodle dropinto their mouths; and under the vines, and squeezed the grape-juicedown their throats; and, if any little pigs ran about ready roasted,crying, "Come and eat me," as was their fashion in that country, theywaited till the pigs ran against their mouths, and then took a bite, andwere content, just as so many oysters would have been.

  They needed no weapons, for no enemies ever came near their land; and notools, for everything was readymade to their hand; and the stern oldfairy Necessity never came near them to hunt them up, and make them usetheir wits, or die.

  And so on, and so on, and so on, till there were never such comfortable,easy-going, happy-go-lucky people in the world.

  "Well, that is a jolly life," said Tom.

  "You think so?" said the fairy. "Do you see that great peaked mountainthere behind," said the fairy, "with smoke coming out of its top?"

  "Yes."

  "And do you see all those ashes, and slag, and cinders lying about?"

  "Yes."

  "Then turn over the next five hundred years, and you will see whathappens next."

  And behold the mountain had blown up like a barrel of gunpowder, andthen boiled over like a kettle; whereby one-third of the Doasyoulikeswere blown into the air, and another third were smothered in ashes; sothat there was only one-third left.

  "You see," said the fairy, "what comes of living on a burning mountain."

  "Oh, why did you not warn them?" said little Ellie.

  "I did warn them all that I could. I let the smoke come out of themountain; and wherever there is smoke there is fire. And I laid theashes and cinders all about; and wherever there are cinders, cinders maybe again. But they did not like to face facts, my dears, as very fewpeople do; and so they invented a cock-and-bull story, which, I am sure,I never told them, that the smoke was the breath of a giant, whom somegods or other had buried under the mountain; and that the cinders werewhat the dwarfs roasted the little pigs whole with; and other nonsenseof that kind. And, when folks are in that humour, I cannot t
each them,save by the good old birch-rod."

  And then she turned over the next five hundred years: and there were theremnant of the Doasyoulikes, doing as they liked, as before. They weretoo lazy to move away from the mountain; so they said, If it has blownup once, that is all the more reason that it should not blow up again.And they were few in number: but they only said, The more the merrier,but the fewer the better fare. However, that was not quite true; for allthe flapdoodle-trees were killed by the volcano, and they had eaten allthe roast pigs, who, of course, could not be expected to have littleones. So they had to live very hard, on nuts and roots which theyscratched out of the ground with sticks. Some of them talked of sowingcorn, as their ancestors used to do, before they came into the land ofReadymade; but they had forgotten how to make ploughs (they hadforgotten even how to make Jews' harps by this time), and had eaten allthe seed-corn which they brought out of the land of Hardwork yearssince; and of course it was too much trouble to go away and find more.So they lived miserably on roots and nuts, and all the weakly littlechildren had great stomachaches, and then died.

  "Why," said Tom, "they are growing no better than savages."

  "And look how ugly they are all getting," said Ellie.

  "Yes; when people live on poor vegetables instead of roast beef andplum-pudding, their jaws grow large, and their lips grow coarse, likethe poor Paddies who eat potatoes."

  And she turned over the next five hundred years. And there they were allliving up in trees, and making nests to keep off the rain. Andunderneath the trees lions were prowling about.

  "Why," said Ellie, "the lions seem to have eaten a good many of them,for there are very few left now."

  "Yes," said the fairy; "you see it was only the strongest and mostactive ones who could climb the trees, and so escape."

  "But what great, hulking, broad-shouldered chaps they are," said Tom;"they are a rough lot as ever I saw."

  "Yes, they are getting very strong now; for the ladies will not marryany but the very strongest and fiercest gentlemen, who can help them upthe trees out of the lions' way."

  And she turned over the next five hundred years. And in that they werefewer still, and stronger, and fiercer; but their feet had changed shapevery oddly, for they laid hold of the branches with their great toes asif they had been thumbs, just as a Hindoo tailor uses his toes to threadhis needle.

  The children were very much surprised, and asked the fairy whether thatwas her doing.

  "Yes, and no," she said, smiling. "It was only those who could use theirfeet as well as their hands who could get a good living: or, indeed, getmarried; so that they got the best of everything, and starved out allthe rest; and those who are left keep up a regular breed oftoe-thumb-men, as a breed of short-horns, or skye-terriers, or fancypigeons is kept up."

  "But there is a hairy one among them," said Ellie.

  "Ah!" said the fairy, "that will be a great man in his time, and chiefof all the tribe."

  And, when she turned over the next five hundred years, it was true.

  For this hairy chief had had hairy children, and they hairier childrenstill; and every one wished to marry hairy husbands, and have hairychildren too; for the climate was growing so damp that none but thehairy ones could live: all the rest coughed and sneezed, and had sorethroats, and went into consumptions, before they could grow up to be menand women.

  Then the fairy turned over the next five hundred years. And they werefewer still.

  "Why, there is one on the ground picking up roots," said Ellie, "and hecannot walk upright."

  No more he could; for in the same way that the shape of their feet hadaltered, the shape of their backs had altered also.

  "Why," cried Tom, "I declare they are all apes."

  "Something fearfully like it, poor foolish creatures," said the fairy."They are grown so stupid now, that they can hardly think: for none ofthem have used their wits for many hundred years. They have almostforgotten, too, how to talk. For each stupid child forgot some of thewords it heard from its stupid parents, and has not wits enough to makefresh words for itself. Besides, they are grown so fierce and suspiciousand brutal that they keep out of each other's way, and mope and sulk inthe dark forests, never hearing each other's voice, till they haveforgotten almost what speech is like. I am afraid they will all be apesvery soon, and all by doing only what they liked."

  And in the next five hundred years they were all dead and gone, by badfood and wild beasts and hunters; all except one tremendous old fellowwith jaws like a jack, who stood full seven feet high; and M. Du Chaillucame up to him, and shot him, as he stood roaring and thumping hisbreast. And he remembered that his ancestors had once been men, andtried to say, "Am I not a man and a brother?" but had forgotten how touse his tongue; and then he had tried to call for a doctor, but he hadforgotten the word for one. So all he said was "Ubboboo!" and died.

  And that was the end of the great and jolly nation of the Doasyoulikes.And, when Tom and Ellie came to the end of the book, they looked verysad and solemn; and they had good reason so to do, for they reallyfancied that the men were apes, and never thought, in their simplicity,of asking whether the creatures had hippopotamus majors in their brainsor not; in which case, as you have been told already, they could notpossibly have been apes, though they were more apish than the apes ofall aperies.

  "But could you not have saved them from becoming apes?" said littleEllie, at last.

  "At first, my dear; if only they would have behaved like men, and set towork to do what they did not like. But the longer they waited, andbehaved like the dumb beasts, who only do what they like, the stupiderand clumsier they grew; till at last they were past all cure, for theyhad thrown their own wits away. It is such things as this that help tomake me so ugly, that I know not when I shall grow fair."

  "And where are they all now?" asked Ellie.

  "Exactly where they ought to be, my dear."

  "Yes!" said the fairy, solemnly, half to herself, as she closed thewonderful book. "Folks say now that I can make beasts into men, bycircumstances, and selection, and competition, and so forth. Well,perhaps they are right; and perhaps, again, they are wrong. That is oneof the seven things which I am forbidden to tell, till the coming of theCocqcigrues; and, at all events, it is no concern of theirs. Whatevertheir ancestors were, men they are; and I advise them to behave as such,and act accordingly. But let them recollect this, that there are twosides to every question, and a downhill as well as an uphill road; and,if I can turn beasts into men, I can, by the same laws of circumstances,and selection, and competition, turn men into beasts. You were very nearbeing turned into a beast once or twice, little Tom. Indeed, if you hadnot made up your mind to go on this journey, and see the world, like anEnglishman, I am not sure but that you would have ended as an eft in apond."

  "Oh, dear me!" said Tom; "sooner than that, and be all over slime, I'llgo this minute, if it is to the world's end."