Embracing The Earl's Dream: A Clean Regency Romance (Resolved In Love Book 4)

by Penny Fairbanks

  “You and Daniel are such an excellent couple and little May is such a joy. Doesn’t your life feel so perfect now?” Juliet asked, her imagination taking her to her future where perhaps her own life would be as perfect as Rosamund’s.

  “Hmm, perfect.” Rosamund pouted, pondering Juliet’s question. “I would not say my life feels perfect now. Not exactly. We have our struggles as husband and wife, as new parents to a girl who seems to share more traits with her mother than just fiery hair. But it does not need to be perfect and I find I love that even more. No matter what happens, I know Daniel and I will find a way through it together. We celebrate joys and overcome struggles and that makes our relationship so much stronger and sweeter. My, when did I become so philosophical?” Rosamund put a finger to her chin, looking off to the side as if in deep thought.

  “You must have spent too much time around Henry,” Juliet laughed. “But I think I understand what you mean. It’s not about being perfect. It’s about being together.”

  “Precisely!” Rosamund cried, her eyes lighting up as if Juliet had finally grasped a challenging concept from her lesson book.

  “I must ask, Juliet, why did that footman give you such a strange look earlier?” Rosamund asked as Juliet refilled her cup. “Based on your recent letters it sounded like the other staff were being kinder to you.”

  Juliet sighed and bit her lip. “They did not think it appropriate or fair that I got to attend the ball. I’d been so happy that we all seemed to finally exist in a pleasant state, if not a friendly one. Now it seems like I’ve been set back, marked as an outsider again.”

  Rosamund took a thoughtful sip of chocolate before shrugging nonchalantly. “None of that will matter soon anyway.”

  “How so?” Juliet asked.

  “Well, you’ll be mistress of this house soon and they will just have to accept that. I know you will manage your home with kindness and skill, so I’m sure they’ll come to appreciate and respect you in no time.”

  A strange uneasiness churned in Juliet’s stomach as she processed her friend’s words. It took her a few hesitant sips of chocolate to realize why.

  She had been so thrilled about her new courtship with Solomon that she hadn’t thought that far ahead. She’d been allowing herself to enjoy the fact that Solomon had not only forgiven her, but wanted her to be in his life as more than a friend.

  For the first time, Juliet understood that if they married—and everything in her heart yearned for it—that she would be a countess instead of a governess. She had long since given up on any path that included her being called Mrs. or even Lady.

  What would happen with Pearl if Juliet became her aunt? What would become of Juliet’s hard-earned principles and her need to enrich others’ lives? Was there any way for her to have everything she wanted?

  “Juliet, are you feeling unwell?” Rosamund asked, snapping Juliet back to reality. She shook her head, both to assure Rosamund she felt fine and to banish those troubling thoughts.

  “Could I have more chocolate, please?” Pearl had scooted forward on the blanket, situating herself closer to Juliet and the tray of chocolate and pastries.

  Juliet was just about to tell Pearl she should not have a third cup of chocolate when she and Rosamund noticed it at the same time—Pearl’s darling little chocolate mustache. Both women burst out into laughter, Rosamund nearly toppling over into Juliet and causing a much bigger mess than the one on Pearl’s face.

  If only Solomon could see this! Juliet silently lamented to herself as she wiped the girl’s face. Surely he would laugh the loudest of them all.

  Juliet truly wanted to share every experience with him, both perfect and imperfect and everything in between. What could really be so bad about giving up the purpose she’d found, if it meant she could share all of life’s moments with Solomon?

  Juliet’s pencil gently scratched against the thick paper of her sketchbook, the sound almost lulling her into a trance. She had just seen Pearl off to bed and had some time to spend by herself in the small sitting room before she too must sleep—though Juliet did not anticipate that she would spend much time sketching after their long, adventurous day.

  Her day had been nearly perfect. Pearl had done very well with her lessons and they’d had a lovely time in the orchard with Rosamund. It would have been perfect—if not for the almost complete lack of Solomon.

  Henry, Daniel, and Rosamund had stayed a few days longer than the rest of the guests who had attended Solomon’s spring ball, but they would be leaving for their own homes soon. Solomon did his part as dutiful host by taking the gentlemen out around the grounds and doing as much together as they could before they went their separate ways once more.

  Even still, Juliet selfishly missed him. She paused in her lonely thoughts to look down at her drawing. Her cheeks reddened when she realized that she’d been unconsciously drawing a very striking pair of eyes.

  A quiet knock at the door startled Juliet. She quickly covered the sketch with her hands. When she looked up she found those very same eyes staring back at her.

  “I’d hoped to find you in here.” Solomon smiled softly as he approached.

  Juliet’s heart felt at complete ease as Solomon sat in the chair next to her. She had been starving for his presence.

  Solomon pulled his chair closer and peered at the sketchbook she still hid. He put one large hand over hers, completely engulfing them, and brushed his thumb against her skin. “May I see?”

  Juliet gave a small nod, allowing Solomon to move her hands away. She had always been decent at sketching and normally did not feel any embarrassment when showing her work, but now she felt quite self-conscious to show Solomon a sketch of his own eyes.

  He looked with a blank expression before asking quietly, “Is this me?”

  “Yes, as a matter of fact.”

  Solomon melted into a sweet, happy smile, as if everything had been put right in his world.

  Juliet’s embarrassment fled. “I’ve never seen such pretty eyes. They could very well be a painting themselves. I’m not as good with paint, but I would like to try someday, though I think it would be a challenge even for the best painters of our time to capture that lovely green.”

  “You must not have seen your own eyes in a mirror then,” Solomon chuckled. He carefully set the sketchbook aside on a nearby table. “How have you been, dear Juliet? I’m sorry I couldn’t spend more time with you today.”

  “You musn’t apologize,” Juliet insisted. “This is part of your duty, after all, and they are your dear friends, so you must spend time with them when you can. Besides, I have my own matters to attend to. To answer your question I have been well. We quite enjoyed our surprise of chocolate in the orchard.”

  “I’m so very glad to hear it,” Solomon whispered, suddenly growing serious. He leaned forward and took both Juliet’s hands in his. “You know, soon your duty might be to help me host guests as well.”

  Juliet felt the breath leave her body. There it was again. Had everyone realized this but her? She’d been able to push her concerns away when Rosamund had brought them up earlier, but to have them thrust upon her again in the same day...Juliet clenched her jaw, trying to keep her thoughts from running wild.

  “Juliet? Is everything alright?” When Juliet refocused her attention on Solomon, she saw nothing but concern and adoration in his eyes—love, even.

  “I-I’m fine. Something inside me just feels a bit uneasy,” she mumbled. If this conversation had happened four years ago, Juliet would never have confessed to even that small truth. But since she and Solomon had truly reconnected, she’d promised herself that she would try to be more open. Failing to do so had gotten them into this situation in the first place.

  “I’m sorry, dear.” Solomon frowned and put a hand to her forehead, searching for the cause of her discomfort. “Have I done something wrong? Please tell me if I have and I will fix it right away.”

  Juliet stared at him for a long, silent moment. What cou
ld she say? That she felt strange talking about a future that contained one of her desires, but not the other? That was no one’s issue but her own. Solomon had done nothing wrong.

  “Of course not, Solomon. I’ve just missed you so.” Another half-truth, but the relief on Solomon’s face was worth it—even if the hollowness in Juliet’s stomach continued to grow.

  “Then would you and Pearl join me on the veranda for tea in the morning?” he asked, eagerly leaning forward in his seat.

  “Yes, of course.” Juliet cupped his jaw in her hand, forcing herself to forget everything but the man before her, who clearly craved her presence just as much as she craved his.

  “Excellent. I hope to give you a glimpse into what your future will be like. Goodnight, Juliet.” Solomon kissed her forehead and left the room, leaving Juliet reeling from both the sweet intimacy of his lips against her skin and the increasing uneasiness bubbling up inside her.

  Juliet no longer felt like sketching, so she packed up her supplies, ready to sleep and set aside these unnecessary worries for a while. She paused outside Pearl’s room, just a few doors down from her own. The door stood slightly ajar. Juliet pressed a hand against it, quietly pushing it open enough for her to put her head through.

  Pearl slept soundly, her tiny form rising and falling beneath her blanket with each breath. Juliet smiled as she spotted a small foot dangling off the side of the bed. She carefully approached the sleeping child and tucked that precious foot back under the warmth and safety of the blanket. Pearl wrinkled her nose and flipped onto her other side without waking.

  A heavy melancholy settled over Juliet as she slipped out of the room. This special bond she’d created, this special purpose she’d found may very well soon come to an end.

  Chapter 10

  Solomon paced up and down the veranda, the cool spring breeze ruffling his hair and the sun beaming down upon his estate. He’d arrived early for his engagement with Juliet and Pearl because he’d been too full of energy. He’d called his valet ahead of schedule and got dressed, seeing no point in pacing in his room if he could pace in the beautiful fresh air.

  At first he’d tried sitting at the elegant tea table overlooking the small rose garden, but his body soon forced him up, needing some release for the anticipation coursing through him. He’d been pacing for several minutes by the time the door to the veranda opened. Solomon whipped around to see Juliet and Pearl stepping outside.

  Juliet was breathtaking as ever, her pale blonde hair gleaming in the sunlight and her lovely pastel blue dress flowing about her. He’d missed seeing Juliet in such a wide variety of pretty colors. They all suited her much better than black and gray. She smiled when she saw Solomon, but the smile did not reach her eyes.

  Solomon bit back a frown. She looked troubled, though she clearly tried to hide it. Guilt gnawed at him. Had he been pushing their newly rekindled relationship too hard and too fast? They had entered into a strange kind of courtship, one that for the most part remained secret aside from their chosen few confidants. There would be no dinner parties full of guests where they would send longing glances to each other across the table. There would be no carriage rides in Hyde Park where they were just one flirting couple among many. There would be no evenings spent at the theater that would inspire hours of thoughtful conversation and occasional debate. But still, Solomon had felt so certain that they would pick up where they had left off, continuing down the path they should have taken years ago.

  “Good morning, my lord,” Juliet greeted him, her light voice surprisingly cheery despite the hesitation Solomon had seen in her face just a moment ago. He would grasp onto this positive moment and not spoil the morning by making her uncomfortable in any way.

  “Good morning, ladies. You both look radiant today.” He beamed, bowing gracefully as they curtsied.

  They all sat down at the tea table, Solomon pulling chairs out for both ladies himself, while instructing the nearest footman to bring a tray of tea and biscuits. He silently observed Juliet and Pearl for a moment, noticing once more Juliet’s careful attentiveness to his niece as she tucked a napkin over her lap and the girl’s obvious adoration of the governess.

  “Pearl, did you sleep well or go anywhere exciting in your dreams last night?” Solomon asked.

  “Oh yes!” Pearl bounced eagerly in her seat, her eyes sparkling. Solomon and Juliet both chuckled as they heard her tale. “I dreamt that I had a lovely white pony and we rode all around the world, over fields and even in the clouds and underwater!”

  “That sounds like quite an adventure!” Solomon’s eyebrows shot up as Pearl finished recalling her dream. “I promise you shall have your dream pony when you get a little older. How does that sound?”

  “Thank you, Uncle Solomon!” Pearl smiled widely, positively buzzing at the thought of having her very own steed to carry her wherever her heart desired.

  As Solomon continued to talk with his niece, he watched Juliet form the corner of his eye. He noticed with a curious and slightly uneasy feeling that she looked at Pearl with a hint of sadness in her eyes.

  Was something going wrong in Pearl’s lessons? Or perhaps she had been struggling with her parents’ loss again. She still had her moments of sadness, but, overall, she was able to recover more quickly and could speak about her mama and papa with ease, happily reflecting upon her memories of them. She even regularly asked Solomon to tell her stories from when she was a baby and stories of her parents from before she’d been born.

  In any case, Solomon knew he should not ask about it just now. That would certainly spoil the morning. As soon as the tea arrived, everyone settled into happy conversation. Solomon asked Pearl how she’d been enjoying her lessons as a subtle way to gauge Juliet’s reaction. The girl showed nothing but excitement about her education and Juliet watched her speak with pride. There seemed to be no issues there.

  “How did you enjoy your fishing excursion yesterday, my lord?” Juliet asked, her voice a strange mixture of soft curiosity and something like hesitation or anxiety.

  “We had quite a wonderful time. Thank you for asking, Miss Richards.” Despite his worries, Solomon couldn’t help smiling as he shared details of his day spent with Henry and Mr. Williams. Juliet listened so intently to everything he said, her eyes never leaving his face even when taking a sip of tea.

  Solomon had forgotten what it was like to have a smart, kind, beautiful woman actually care about what he said. Almost every lady in his life had been more interested in hearing about his money rather than his hobbies. He’d been burned once before by Miss Woolmer because she had been able to fake her interest so well that Solomon had truly believed she cared for him and not his title.

  As he watched Juliet watching him, listening and absorbing every word with real interest in her eyes, Solomon knew that she was genuine. He could feel it in the depths of his heart.

  In truth, he’d known it even back in London when she’d broken their courtship. Juliet had not given any reason for her sudden change, but, through the haze of his aching anger, Solomon had known that it didn’t have anything to do with his wealth or someone coming along with even more of it. At the time, that had made overcoming his pain even harder. He could understand reasons of money and rank; Juliet’s reasons remained as mysterious as the day she’d left him behind.

  Solomon did not know how to broach the topic or even if he should. He feared that one or both of them would be hurt by the recollection of those upsetting events. He just wanted to move forward, leaving all those terrible things in the past as distant memories. It seemed that Juliet wished to do the same, for she had remained silent on the topic since their confessions during the spring ball.

  “Oh goodness, how could I forget?” he continued, falling into the ease of the conversation. “As you know, Miss Richards, Henry has never been a great outdoorsman. Well, he must have been lost in thought when he received an unexpected tug at his fishing pole, for he nearly fell into the pond!”

  Juliet and
Pearl both laughed, the charming sounds mingling with the morning birdsong. They made such an excellent audience that Solomon wished he could regale them with stories for hours on end to keep hearing them giggle or gasp in wonder. Instead, Solomon allowed himself to forget his worries as they enjoyed the rest of their tea, each taking their turn to chat about whatever subject they wished.

  As they each sipped their last bits of tea and wiped away the biscuit crumbs at the corners of their mouths, Solomon decided he wanted to spend a little more time with the ladies. “Pearl, Miss Richards, how would you feel about joining me on a walk before you start on your busy day of lessons?”

  Pearl cheered and Juliet lit up, eagerly nodding her agreement. Confidence restored, Solomon summoned a footman to clear away their tea, offering his right arm to Juliet and his left hand to Pearl.

  They stepped down from the veranda into the small rose garden nearby. A mixture of buds and blooms dotted the neatly groomed bushes, their sweet fragrance wafting all about them on the breeze.

  Ever eager, Pearl’s hand shot out to grab a freshly opened white rose. Before Solomon knew it, Juliet had left his side and rushed over to the girl, carefully pulling her hand away. The rose escaped unscathed.

  “Remember Pearl, we must be very careful with flowers. We can smell them, but we must be gentle if we wish to touch. They are quite fragile, so we musn’t cause them any harm. And these have thorns, so be sure to look before you touch,” Juliet reprimanded, both firm yet kind and understanding.

  Pearl quickly nodded and took a step back. She clasped her hands behind her back, closed her eyes, and leaned forward. She took a long, deep inhale before standing up straight once more and releasing a contented sigh. Solomon and Juliet looked at each other and laughed at the girl’s charming antics. It felt so lovely and right to be laughing together again, his deep voice lifting up her sweet one.