That Long Lost Summer

by Minna Howard

  ‘I’d call that bad.’ Flora laid her hand on his shoulder in sympathy. ‘Well, you must expect us to wait on you, bring you anything you need.’

  He smiled at her. ‘That’s kind, thank you. I feel such a fool. I was using soap, I prefer it to shower gel and I must have dropped it and I slipped. Stupid.’ He sighed.

  ‘Well, I am very sorry. How long have you got to be in plaster?’ Xavier asked.

  ‘Quite a few weeks, but Matt kindly said I can stay here as long as I need to. I can’t drive, of course, and I was going to leave in a couple of days and stop off to visit some friends on the way home.’ He sighed. ‘It’s a bug… a nuisance,’ he hurriedly amended, seeing Laurie’s keen interest.

  ‘We are going to the beach and I’m having an ice cream,’ Laurie said. ‘Do you want to come with us in the car?’

  ‘Not today, thank you, but go and have a lovely time and tell me all about it when you get back.’ Ben gave him a lopsided grin. He had a film of sweat over his face, which he mopped with a large handkerchief.

  Flora wondered if all the others had gone out for the day. If so, Ben would be alone. She felt someone should stay with him as he would probably find it difficult getting about for a day or so. They’d seen Eadie and Serge in the village, so maybe they were planning to stay here once they’d had breakfast. Though she remembered she had the apricots to cook and Laurie was now pulling at his father’s hand, saying they must get ready for the beach as he’d promised.

  Xavier had put their provisions away in the kitchen but had obviously forgotten, if indeed he’d ever taken it in, that she needed to cook the apricots this morning so they would be really cold by supper time.

  She said. ‘You go with Laurie to the beach. I can always join you later, I have a car after all.’

  ‘I forgot that you did,’ Xavier said. ‘OK, well, try and join us.’ He touched her bare arm briefly before succumbing to Laurie’s impatience.

  Ben said. ‘Don’t stay here on my account, Flora. Matt and Susie are around and I can struggle about if I need to.’

  ‘I haven’t made up my mind, yet, what to do, though I must cook the pudding now. It’s fresh apricots which need to get cold. I can always go later.’

  ‘Sorry you had to take my place getting the supper, this is such a bloody nuisance,’ Ben said savagely.

  ‘These things happen.’ She smiled in sympathy. ‘Just take it easy today. It’s no trouble doing the shopping. I enjoyed it, I love foreign markets and with Hugo off on his boat, I wouldn’t want to do it alone.’

  ‘You make me feel better then. So, how’s he’s doing?’

  ‘I… I haven’t heard yet,’ Flora confessed, feeling that Ben might judge her now, ask why she hadn’t contacted Hugo herself. ‘You know what’s it’s like on a boat, so much to do, getting becalmed or struggling to get into the harbour against the wind.’ She was thinking back to her sailing days in Aldeburgh. The boat Edmund had bought was probably one of those modern plastic looking vessels that looked as if they’d been tipped out of a mould. ‘Anyway,’ she laughed, ‘I’d be bound to message them at some crucial time.’

  ‘And he hasn’t had time to contact you?’ Ben said lightly, but she could see the interest in his eyes.

  ‘He might not have a signal,’ she said lamely. ‘Anyway, I’d better get cooking.’

  She washed the apricots and put them in a pan with water, sugar and vanilla pods and brought them slowly to the boil.

  Susie came into the kitchen. ‘Smells wonderful, sweet fruits and vanilla,’ she said, coming over and peering into the pan. ‘Hope that’s for supper.’

  ‘It is. They need to get really cold so I’m cooking them now.’

  ‘Can’t wait to eat them.’ Susie started to unpack the dishwasher and put the clean dishes away.

  ‘Heard anything from Hugo?’ Susie asked in a friendly way.

  ‘No, I haven’t, though I daren’t contact him either. You know what boats are like, all that fiddling about and things not working. Edmund’s only just bought this boat and I don’t know how experienced a sailor he is, Hugo certainly isn’t.’ She hoped she sounded laid back, even amusing, but Susie knew her too well.

  ‘I’m sorry things don’t seem so good between you both.’ Susie bent over a cupboard while she fitted in a clean dish. ‘I expect he’ll come to terms with this empty nest and everything will be all right again.’

  ‘I hope so.’ Flora gently prodded a couple of apricots. They seemed to be cooked so she turned off the gas. ‘Have you got a china or glass serving bowl I can put these in?’

  ‘Yes, in that cupboard, choose whatever you like.’

  ‘Thanks.’ Flora took out a pale blue bowl, thinking how good the deep yellow apricots would look in that and decanted them into it. She covered it with a clean drying-up cloth. Once they were cold, she’d put them in the fridge until supper time and take out the vanilla pods just before serving them.

  Susie had whisked away the saucepan she’d used and put it in the sink. She was filling it with water and a squirt of washing up liquid. She said. ‘Amazing that you and Xavier knew each other when you were both much younger. I thought he’d been just one of the sailing crowd, but I gather that you were quite close. And now you’ve met up again with us.’

  Flora busied herself clearing up the things she had used, the pointed knife to prize out any tiny stalks and the chopping board, and she wiped down the marble worktop where she’d been working even though it was already spotless. ‘Yes, I told you we met at Aldeburgh. Years ago, before I went to uni.’

  ‘You did, but I didn’t realise that you were more than just casual friends.’ Susie leant back against the sink, regarding her intently. ‘Not that I’m at all surprised. He’s very attractive and lovely with it, but it’s obvious you still hold a candle, or even a whole chandelier,’ she joked, ‘for each other and I wonder if that is why Hugo chose to go off on this boat. I think he should have stayed to fight for you.’

  26

  ‘Is it that obvious?’ Flora felt she must face this head on. Susie was not one of those people who thrived on gossip and family dramas.

  ‘Well, to me it is.’ Susie paused, bit her lip and then said tentatively, looking apprehensive as if she might be opening a can of worms. ‘There’s nothing massive is there… like an illness, cancer, lost his business? You know, the kind of thing that knocks everyone for six?’

  ‘Oh no. We are just finding it difficult being thrown back on ourselves without the girls,’ Flora said. ‘We’ll get used to it. Children growing up and leaving home is just a fact of life, isn’t it?’

  Before Susie could answer Eadie came into the kitchen. ‘Oh, my dears, I’m interrupting. I’m so sorry, perhaps I ought to carry a bell, let you know I’m on my way.’

  ‘No, Eadie, stay,’ Flora said, relieved her conversation with Susie had been disturbed. The more Susie asked, the more the feelings she was trying to ignore swelled up in her, demanding to be heard.

  ‘If you’re sure.’ Eadie smiled at them. ‘So sorry for poor Ben. What dreadful luck to break his leg. Serge and I are staying put today, so if you want to go out, we’ll be here to look after him.’

  ‘That’s very kind, Eadie, but I’m staying here too. Matt might go and play golf and Flora, don’t you want to go to the beach?’

  Flora wondered if her question really meant did she want to be with Xavier? And although she had planned to go to the beach, she now decided she would not. The water was lovely in the pool, she had a good book to read and, she told herself firmly, she must message Hugo. She was worried now by Susie’s words. What if he had sensed that she and Xavier had been more than ships passing in the night at Aldeburgh?

  Had Hugo accepted Edmund’s invitation to sail away with him in the hope she’d go off with Xavier because he no longer wanted to be with her now the children had gone?

  ‘I’ll stay here. I feel too lazy to set off for the beach.’ She hoped she sounded cheerful, afraid now of this new though
t. ‘I’ll just go and try to touch base with Hugo, then I’ll put the apricots in the fridge once they’ve cooled a bit.’

  She slipped out of the kitchen and down the passage to their room. Before she could put it off, she WhatsApped Hugo.

  Haven’t heard from you, hope it’s fun. XX.

  She pressed send.

  She tidied her room, put on her bathing suit, took a pile of washing to the laundry room and loaded her clothes into the empty machine before going out into the garden with her book and her mobile.

  Ben was chatting to Serge, so she gave them a wave before settling down by the pool. She checked her mobile but there was no message from Hugo. He probably hadn’t got it yet. Maybe he had left his mobile in the cabin and was busy sailing.

  Susie came towards her. ‘I’ve put your apricots in the fridge, that OK?’

  ‘I was about to do it, thanks.’ She slipped her mobile under her towel, not wanting Susie to ask her if she’d contacted Hugo.

  ‘I’ll be back soon. A friend’s just rung and I’m going to have a drink with them up the road,’ Susie said. ‘But do join the others on the beach if you want. Eadie and Serge will hold the fort here.’

  ‘No, I’m fine by the pool, nice and peaceful. The beach will probably be crowded. It’s so lovely in the garden and I’ve got an exciting book.’

  ‘See you later then.’ Susie touched her shoulder as if she understood Flora’s dilemma. Torn between her spaced-out husband and a long ago lover.

  Eadie came over to join her. ‘I’ll just sit here. I won’t disturb you,’ she said.

  ‘That’s fine, it’s almost too hot to read.’ Flora was glad not to be left alone stressing about why Hugo had not answered her message. Perhaps his mobile had fallen over the side, or he had? She must not imagine dramatic scenarios. She’d sent it barely an hour ago.

  ‘So, how’s your husband doing?’ Eadie asked. ‘It’s so lovely sailing around the coast. Serge gets dreadfully seasick so we have a campervan instead. I had rather hoped to live on a boat, but it wouldn’t be fair on him and anyway it’s not much fun in the winter.’

  ‘I… haven’t heard from him,’ Flora said. ‘I sent him a message this morning, but he hasn’t responded.’

  ‘Well, you know what being on a boat is like, all those ropes, sails, and engines conking out and things,’ Eadie said, with a slight frown. ‘You mean you haven’t heard at all, or just today?’

  ‘Not at all. I don’t even know if they arrived safely at the boat, or what kind it is. I should have contacted him before really.’

  ‘I see, but I’m sure he’s fine,’ Eadie said doubtfully. ‘I mean, did you know he was going on this boat trip before you came?’

  ‘No, and he hardly knows Edmund. We met him somewhere years ago and haven’t seen him since. He can’t be described as a friend.’ She knew she sounded angry. She felt the tension in her body rebound in her voice. ‘I don’t think he should have just upped and gone when we’ve been invited here.’

  Eadie said gently, ‘I’m sure Susie and Matt understand, if it was something exciting that suddenly came up. You are on holiday, after all.’

  ‘But it wasn’t. He’s never been mad about boats, especially on the sea and for that matter, he’s never liked golf yet he went off with Matt. I don’t mean to make too much of that. He probably did it to please Matt who had no one else to play with at the time.’ Flora felt rather foolish now, childish. They’d been married too long to be in each other’s pockets and she despised jealous wives, or husbands for that matter.

  Eadie said bracingly, ‘I’m sure he’ll get in touch with you soon. When is he back?’

  ‘He’s gone for a week so he’ll be back in four or five days. I’m sure if he’s going to be any longer, got becalmed, broken down or something, he’ll let me know,’ she said with more certainty than she felt.

  ‘I’m sure he will, and anyway it’s good to have different interests. He can tell you all about it when he comes back,’ Eadie said, absentmindedly deadheading the geraniums in a pot beside her.

  The day meandered on and the others began drifting back. Xavier and Laurie came back at teatime. Laurie was hot and tired so it was a relief when Alegria turned up and played a game with him on her iPad.

  Xavier sat down beside Flora in the shade. ‘I’m back to cook. When do we have to put the ducks in?’ His voice was soft and seductive.

  She tried to ignore the warmth that swept through her. ‘We might get them ready now, find a dish, cut up the oranges.’

  ‘OK, chef.’ He laughed, taking her hand and pulling her up.

  ‘I’ll come and help you find dishes and things.’ Susie, chatting to Ben, sprang up and came with them.

  ‘Don’t disturb yourself, I’m sure we’ll find them,’ Xavier said, but Susie insisted and even when she’d produced what they needed, she stayed chatting with them in the kitchen.

  The supper was a great success, the duck a l’orange were succulent and tasty and then came her pudding, ice-cold fresh apricots flavoured with vanilla pods with thick cream.

  ‘Worth breaking my leg for,’ Ben said. ‘If the supper had been left to us chaps it would probably just have been ham sandwiches.’

  ‘We could have done better than that, but Flora’s genius has made a feast.’ Xavier smiled at her and she felt the whole table must feel the desire between them.

  Not until she was in bed, alone in their room did Flora take one last look at her mobile. There was still no answer from Hugo at all. She sent another message.

  Are you all right? Please contact me. XX.

  27

  Laurie was over-tired and complaining about the heat, and Xavier was at his wit’s end, not knowing what to do with him. He’d hardly slept during the night and he wanted his mother.

  ‘I want to go to Mum, now,’ he said grumpily while Xavier was trying to cajole him into getting dressed.

  ‘It’s not possible. I told you Grandpa Mike is not well and she’s gone to look after him.’ He tried not to sound impatient, show his annoyance.

  ‘I want her now,’ Laurie insisted, pulling his legs up to his chest and hiding his face in his knees.

  ‘Well, I’m sorry, but you can’t. I’ve explained why. We’ll ring her later. Families are like that sometimes, someone needing extra help.’

  ‘We’re not a real family,’ Laurie muttered from his knees. ‘We don’t all live together.’ He lifted his face, creased with pain and fury. ‘I want a family who all live in the same house.’

  His words pierced Xavier’s heart. How could he explain to a young boy that adult relationships did not always work out? He’d been determined not to say anything unkind – or even reveal the truth about Darcy’s sexual adventures to her son.

  He put his hand on the child’s thin shoulders and felt him flinch. It was like a knife piercing him. He wanted to hug him, hold him close to try to soothe away his pain, but instead, the hurt of his son’s rejection made him angry.

  ‘I’m going to have breakfast. Get yourself dressed and come and join us.’

  In the garden, Susie said. ‘Is Laurie still asleep? I’ve got a special pain au chocolat for him from the village.’

  ‘No, he’s not in a very good mood this morning,’ Xavier said quietly. ’I think he had a bit too much sun yesterday and he’s missing his mother.’

  ‘Poor little boy.’ Susie touched his arm in sympathy. ‘He’s just tired and hot, I expect. Don’t read too much into it.’

  Flora joined them. She looked exhausted and gratefully accepted a cup of coffee from Tony.

  ‘Thanks, just what I needed,’ she said, sitting down beside Martha.

  She did not look towards Xavier and yet he felt her presence. What if the two of them had married? Would they have had a family, been happy together?

  He felt guilty now about leaving Laurie alone. It was his parents who’d mucked up, not him. ‘I’ll go and see how he is,’ he said.

  ‘Wait and I’ll fetch his pain au chocolat.
That might cheer him up,’ Susie said.

  ‘Is Laurie not well?’ Flora asked.

  ‘He wants Darcy. It’s all been rather unsettling, her having to rush off so suddenly like that, and him coming here in the plane on his own.’

  Flora reached out and took his hand, keeping it close to the table so it did not look obvious. ‘Don’t worry children can be so dramatic. He’ll soon snap out of it.’ She let go of his hand. He longed to snatch it back, take her in his arms and hold her close. Looking at her now, he saw the shadows under her eyes and guessed she had not slept well. Was she missing Hugo?

  Back in their room he found Laurie still in his pyjamas on the bed, glaring at him defiantly, his face wet with tears. Xavier sat down beside him and took him in his arms.

  ‘I know it’s hard to understand,’ he said, feeling the child relax a little against him. ‘But Mum has to be with Grandpa, help him get well again. We’ll talk to her later, but look, Susie bought you your favourite, a pain au chocolat. You’ll feel better once you’ve eaten that and we’ll make a nice plan for today. What would you like to do?’

  ‘I don’t know,’ Laurie said, shuddering with unhappiness. He gulped, took a breath and faced him. ‘Can we ring Mum?’

  ‘Of course, but let’s have breakfast first.’

  Laurie took a bite of the pain au chocolat, and then another, before he slowly got up, took off his pyjamas and began to pull on his clothes. The crisis was over for the moment, although Xavier feared it would not be the last.

  Later when Alegria and Laurie were racing each other in the swimming pool, he sat down beside Flora and Ben. Ben looked better this morning though he told them he’d found it difficult to sleep.

  ‘This damn plaster cast makes it impossible to get comfortable,’ he said, trying to sound cheerful.

  Martha seemed to have taken it upon herself to wait on him and while she was talking to him Xavier said quietly to Flora, ‘Have you heard from Hugo yet?’

  ‘No,’ she said and he saw the tightening of her mouth, the fear in her eyes. ‘I sent him a text yesterday and he hasn’t responded, and I sent another last night and still not a word. I’m worried something has happened or…’ she glanced over at Martha and Ben, but they were deep in discussion, ‘or he’s just… gone.’