Professor Wolf

by J. L. Wilder

  God. Could she really be pregnant?

  Everything had happened so fast. It felt as if she had just arrived at Omega University, and already her entire world had shifted. She was mated to one of her professors—imprinted upon—and now, it seemed, she might be pregnant as well.

  How could all this have happened so quickly?

  She remembered her last conversation with her father before she had set off for school. “The world outside our pack is different from what you’ve always known,” he had told her. “You’re going to encounter new ideas and new temptations. I expect you to stick to what you know is right. I expect you to remember who you are and how you were raised. If you can’t do that, you’ll be brought back home, and you’ll wish you had behaved yourself.”

  Cait had promised to comply.

  She had hardly been listening to him then. Her mind had already been full of her plan to sneak away and infiltrate Shifter U. She had already been intoxicated with the hope of winning freedom from her family for the first time in her life. And, of course, she hadn’t known that Bart would be at school with her. She hadn’t known how short-lived her freedom would really be.

  Now she could see that, although her father had been controlling and unsympathetic toward her, he had also had a point.

  The world was full of strange temptations.

  Cait had been taken in by one of them.

  If she were pregnant, would she regret the course of action that had led to it?

  No, she thought. I’ll never regret my mating with Grant. And he’ll help me. He’ll know what we need to do now. We’re going to get through this together.

  Chapter Fifteen

  GRANT

  Cait was one of the first to arrive in Grant’s classroom.

  He kept his eyes on his work as the rest of the class made their way in, but every so often, he allowed himself to glance up at her. She had dressed appropriately today, and that was a relief. She wore long, loose-fitting jeans and a bulky sweater.

  He had to admit, he missed seeing her body.

  But it was better this way. She had learned her lesson. She had gained an understanding of how important it was that they keep their relationship secret. That meant there was hope for them.

  He couldn’t help wondering whether she was sick. She seemed pale and withdrawn. She wasn’t talking to the students who sat around her. She had a notebook open on her desk, and she was staring at the pages as if something captivating were written there.

  The last time he had seen her had been in the tent after the social. She had been fine then.

  Could something have happened since?

  There was no way Bart could have come back on campus. Grant had spoken to the dean at Shifter University, who had promised that he wouldn’t be back.

  It was probably nothing to worry about. Maybe she was worried about one of her other classes, or maybe she’d had a fight with a friend. There were all kinds of things that could be behind her mood.

  But Grant couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong. And he was her alpha. He was attuned to her in a way that no one else was.

  I should trust my instincts about this.

  So he was both relieved and worried when, as the rest of the class was leaving at the end of the lesson, Cait hung back.

  He waited at his desk, knowing that she would come to him, and she did.

  “Go close the door,” he said, not looking up from his papers.

  She retreated to the back of the room, and Grant heard the door shut. Only then, when there was no chance of anyone passing by and seeing them, did he get to his feet and take her in his arms.

  She melted against him, and for a moment, Grant was awed by how much trust she clearly had in him already. She had taken refuge in him. He was amazed that the rebellious girl he’d met on the first day of class could have submitted to him so fully.

  It was a powerful feeling. It made him want to protect her even more.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked her. “I could tell as soon as you walked in that something was on your mind. Tell me.”

  She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I had to see you,” she whispered. “I’ve been thinking about it since last night. Just let me have a moment, okay?”

  He tightened his embrace around her.

  “It can’t be like last time,” he cautioned her. “We can’t do that in the classroom again. That was extremely careless of us.”

  “Yeah, it was,” she agreed, her voice sounding strange and raw.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked her again. “Are you sick? You seem so different.”

  “Do I?” She looked up at him. “How so?”

  “You look pale,” he said. “You seem like you’re not feeling well.” He rested a hand on her cheek, checking for signs of fever, but her skin was cool. “Are you feeling all right?”

  “I’ve felt better,” she admitted.

  “You should go back to your dorm and rest,” he said. “Take the rest of the day off. I can write you a note to give to your other professors if that would be helpful.”

  “You can do that?” she asked. “You’re not worried they’d think you were showing me favoritism?”

  “No,” he said. “It’s not unusual for professors to do that. Omega students often find themselves overwhelmed by the pressures placed on them and need to take a day off.”

  “The pressures placed on them?” Cait shook her head. She looked suddenly irritated. “What pressures have any of them got to deal with? All they have to do is show up to class and do as they’re told.”

  He frowned. “Do you have it so much harder?” he asked.

  “You know the answer to that,” she said. “You know the kinds of things I’ve had to deal with since coming to school here.”

  “Some of those things have been situations you’ve brought upon yourself,” Grant pointed out.

  Cait stepped back out of his arms and stared up at him. “Are you serious?” she asked. “You’re blaming me for the things I’ve been through?”

  “Not all of them,” Grant said hurriedly. “Of course, the events with Bart weren’t your fault.”

  “Damn right,” she murmured.

  “But you have to admit that you could have worked harder to fit in during your first days here,” he said. “You alienated yourself very early.”

  “You have no idea what you’re talking about,” Cait snapped. “I have friends here. That isn’t the problem. I’ve had no trouble finding people to talk to, people I can relate to.”

  “I’ve seen you in class,” he said gently. “You don’t socialize with the girls around you.”

  “Because I’m in class,” she snapped. “Are you giving me a hard time because I don’t interrupt your teaching to gossip with the other girls?”

  “I’m not giving you a hard time, Cait,” he said, perplexed. Why was she so reactive? “I’m just saying that...if you’re lonely during the times we can’t be together, if that’s one of the things that’s adding stress to your life, maybe I can help you.”

  “You couldn’t help me with something like that,” Cait said. “What could you do? Order the other students to spend time with me? You’re being ridiculous.”

  He was beginning to get angry. “Don’t talk to me that way, Cait.”

  “Or you’ll what?” she challenged. “Imprint on me and make it impossible for me to see you so that I feel like I’m losing my mind all the time? And then, when I try to talk to you about how hard it is, you’ll act like it’s my own fault because I haven’t gotten the other girls to like me?”

  “Cait, come on,” he protested. “None of that is what I said.”

  “I’m friends with lots of people,” she said. “That girl Georgette, who I sit by in class? She’s one of my best friends. We eat meals together every day. Is that supposed to be enough to make up for the fact that I have a mate I’m barely allowed to talk to?”

  “No,” he said. “Of course, it isn’t. But you understan
d why it’s hard for us to spend time together, don’t you? You understand why I can’t always make the time to see you.”

  “And I have Sarah,” Cait went on. “She gets what it’s like for me, even if you don’t. She understands why this is hell.”

  “Hang on,” Grant said. He took her firmly by the shoulders and held her at arm’s length. “Sarah who?”

  “Sarah, my roommate.”

  “Your roommate understands what things are like for you?” Grant swallowed hard, unable to believe what he was hearing. “Are you saying...you can’t be saying that you told your roommate? About us?”

  She was silent.

  She looked down at the floor.

  And he knew.

  “Cait,” he said. “How could you do that? How could you tell? I told you what would happen. I told you what it would mean for us if anyone were to find out.”

  “I had to tell somebody!” she burst out. “I had no one, Grant. It’s like you don’t see that. It’s like you don’t even recognize how fucking alone I’ve been in all of this.”

  “And you think that’s just you?” he asked her. “You think you’re the only one who’s struggling? I can’t tell anyone either, Cait. I’ve had to keep the secret just as much as you have. And meanwhile, my job is on the line. My entire life is on the line. I’m the one who stands to lose everything if this gets out.”

  She laughed bitterly. “You really think you’re the only one who’s taking a risk?” she asked him. “Do you know what my family would do to me if they found out?”

  “They’d try to take you home. But I’d never let that happen.”

  “Taking me home would only be the beginning,” she said. “I’d never be allowed out of the house again. I’d be locked up in a room for Bart to do whatever he wants with me for the rest of my life. You’re worried about losing a job? Get a new job! But don’t act like I’ve got nothing on the line here.”

  He sighed and stepped back. “You’re right,” he admitted. “I should have remembered that you were taking a risk too.”

  “Yes, you should.”

  “But I don’t understand how you could have told your roommate about us,” he said. “If anything, knowing what you have on the line should have made you even more cautious.”

  “Well, I needed to talk to somebody,” she said. “And I couldn’t come to you. You’ve made that almost impossible. You control where and when we see each other. There’s almost nothing I can do, other than waiting for class and trying to hang around when it’s over to get your attention.”

  He shook his head. “I don’t know what to do,” he said.

  “What do you mean?” she asked.

  “I thought you understood how important it was to keep it a secret.”

  “I do understand,” she said. “I told you, I just needed to talk to somebody.”

  “It’s only been two days,” Grant said. “It’s been two days since you and I have seen each other. You couldn’t even wait two days? You couldn’t go that long without talking to anyone about us?”

  “Grant, if you had given me any way to contact you, I would have done that instead!” she protested. “I don’t have an email address for you. I don’t have your phone number. What do you want from me?”

  “If this relationship is going to work,” he said, “you need to understand that I’m your alpha. You need to understand that I make the rules. What I say goes. Everything I do is for your own good, Cait, but if we’re going to make this work, you have to listen to me.”

  She took another step back and stared at him.

  “What do you mean, if we’re going to make this work?” she asked.

  “I just mean—”

  “You imprinted on me,” she said, continuing to back away from him. “You told me you did.”

  “I know, I—”

  “Was that a lie?” Her voice rose in pitch. “Did you just say that so I would sleep with you?”

  He was horrified by the accusation. “Cait. Of course, I didn’t. I wouldn’t do that.”

  “Then how can you act like our being together is a question?” she demanded. “I thought we were mates. I thought it was decided. You told me it was your job to take care of me. I didn’t think that meant you could break up with me as soon as you didn’t like the way I acted!”

  “I’m not—”

  “Just forget it,” she said. “I should have known better than to come here today. I should have known better than to believe anything you ever said to me. You alphas are all the same, aren’t you?”

  “Cait, be quiet,” he said firmly.

  She fell silent.

  But the way she was looking at him...it was mutinous.

  Their bond was so new. It was still so fragile. And now Grant could feel it fraying. If he didn’t act quickly, if he didn’t do something to bring her back under his control, she would break away from him, and then he would lose her.

  The thought was unbearable.

  But his trust in her had been damaged too. She had told her roommate about their relationship.

  He had to say something to her, and quickly—but he had no idea what to say.

  For what felt like a long time, they just stood there staring at each other.

  Then Cait whirled around and ran from the room. As she did so, Grant heard a sob escape her, and he knew she had run from him so that he wouldn’t see her cry.

  That thought was excruciating.

  She’s mine. I’m supposed to shield her from any pain. I’m not supposed to be the one who causes it.

  He knew he should go after her, catch her, bring her back and make this right. But what could he do? If he was seen running after her while she was distraught like this, it would only make matters worse.

  Cait was right. They would both be in trouble if anyone learned what had transpired between them. And the trouble she faced would be far worse than the trouble he faced.

  I can’t let that happen to her. Protecting her from that has to be my absolute first priority right now.

  Which meant that even though he knew she was upset, and even though it killed him to leave her in that state, the best thing he could do for the moment was to let her go.

  Heart aching, he went back to his desk.

  Maybe she had been right about some of the things she’d said. Maybe it would be best if she had access to his phone number. They could buy her a disposable phone, one with a number nobody else had. Then she would be able to text him, and no one would be able to connect the messages and figure out that they were in contact. That might be safe.

  One thing he knew for sure was that something was going to have to change.

  If she feels she has to confide in random girls in her dorm, we’re not doing this well enough. I haven’t created a system that makes her feel safe.

  He felt like such a failure. It was the pain he felt every time an omega chose to leave the school, but because this was Cait, it was magnified by a thousand. He should have taken care of her. He should have made everything easy for her. That was an alpha’s responsibility.

  And he hadn’t lived up to it.

  But he could do better now that he had seen his mistake. He could rectify the problem. He would wait for her to come to him again—he was sure she would—and then he would apologize for what he had said to her today. He would ask her what she needed from him instead of making suggestions, and he would listen and do as she asked to the best of his ability.

  And then everything would be all right.

  At least, he would have to hope that it would be. Because he didn’t know how he would live without her.

  Chapter Sixteen

  CAIT

  Cait’s eyes blurred with tears as she ran down the front steps of the building and out onto the campus lawn.

  How could he?

  How could Grant have suggested that their relationship might not be a permanent thing? Could that really be what he had been thinking this whole time?

  Hadn’t he said that
he intended to commit to her?

  She thought over the conversations they’d had and realized she wasn’t sure.

  But he’d certainly suggested it. He’d made comments about never allowing anyone to hurt her again. Comments like that made it sound as if he intended to be around for the long term. She couldn’t be blamed for interpreting things that way.

  And he’d slept with her! Why would he do that if he didn’t intend for their relationship to last?

  Because he’s an alpha, and they can have sex without consequences. Because alphas have no risk of getting pregnant.

  But he would have known about the risk. He would have known the chance she was taking to be with him.

  He just must not have cared about that.

  That was a horrifying idea. From the moment their relationship had begun, Cait had taken for granted the idea that Grant cared about her. Everything she had done over these last few weeks had been based on that assumption.

  But maybe she had been wrong. Maybe he didn’t actually give a damn at all.

  And she hadn’t even gotten the chance to tell him about her pregnancy.

  Well, fuck him. If that was how he was going to treat her, maybe he didn’t deserve to know.

  She reached the dormitory and raced up the stairs, hoping against hope that Sarah would be out, maybe having lunch with their friends or something. She needed to be alone to sort out her thoughts. And she knew that if her roommate saw her crying like this, it would be immediately obvious what had happened when she had talked to Grant.

  She didn’t want Sarah’s pity, and she definitely didn’t want her judgment.

  She made it up the stairs and flung open the door to her room—

  But the room wasn’t empty.

  A figure stood at the window, staring out.

  A male figure.

  He turned slowly to face her. “It’s about time you got home,” he said quietly. “Your class ended fifteen minutes ago.”

  She sucked in a breath. “Bart?”