Ted nodded in shame "You tried to treat me like a boy. I hate what's down there. I only touch the bottom, like it was a clit, right where the liquid comes out.
Daisy nodded "Now it all makes sense. And you WERE making love to me like a lesbian would, weren't you?"
Ted smiled "In adult movies or erotica, that's my favorite part. I like to read about it in Penthouse Letters as well as romance novels and some magazines I bought when I turned 18."
Daisy kissed Ted gently, straddling his leg. "I'm so flattered, and yes, I love having you as my lesbian lover. I don't know what you do to meet your needs, but I love what you do to me."
Ted smiled "Then we should keep doing that. You can still have your well-hung studs, but you have your lesbian lover as a warm up every night if you want."
Daisy was in awe - Ted knew she was seeing other guys, "Well hung studs" as she called them, but worried that Ted would get Jealous or just give up. Now she understood why he wasn't upset. He wasn't even trying to compete with them.
Daisy give him a big warm hug, and Ted started to cry.
"I'm so sorry, I've never told a student this. I was so afraid you would hate me. Thank you for being so understanding."
Daisy patted him on the back and gave him a kiss. "Why don't you go to your room now and get some sleep. I'll see you in the morning."
Alice
The next day, Daisy went to Ted's room and knocked on the door. He was dressed and ready to go. She gave him a big hug. They went to breakfast and sat down at an empty table, so they could talk. Within 10 minutes, the table was swarmed by a dozen other women from the theater and nursing program.
They were flirting with Ted and joking with Daisy. Ted smiled and giggled. The girls were teasing him for his feminine ways, but they were also fond of him. Some of them were in classes with him, and the rest were enjoying having Ted as a friend.
After a few minutes, Ted got up. "Sorry guys, I have to go to my first appointment and I'm already going to be about 3 minutes late." He took his food tray and left.
Daisy was pounced on immediately. "So, what's the deal with him? Are you dating him? Is he straight?"
Daisy was overwhelmed. How could she tell them what they wanted to know without spilling Ted's secret? "Ted is really nice. By the way, that's such a pretty necklace, where did you get it?" Soon the girls were talking about jewelry, hair, clothes, and shopping. By the time the conversation had gotten back to boys, Daisy had gotten up and left.
Alice Russel, saw Daisy walking to the door "Watch my tray, I'll put it away in a minute."
Sherry said, "Don't worry, I'll take care of it for you."
Alice caught up to Daisy in the quad. "Daisy, the other girls fell for your evasion, but I caught it. So, you looked a bit disturbed, and it's so unusual for a girl to NOT want to talk about her guy. What's going on?"
Daisy snapped "There's nothing WRONG, just because I don't want to gossip about a guy, doesn't mean I'm upset."
Alice knew "If you were a lesbian, I'd understand you not wanting to talk about your love life. I'm a bit evasive myself."
Daisy stopped and looked Alice in the eye "You're into girls?"
Alice nodded, "Something's going on with Ted isn't there? I've always had strong intuition, and now I'm a psych major. Hoping to get my CSW when I graduate. What can you tell me? I promise to keep it in confidence. But both of you are giving off red flags."
Daisy turned to Alice, tearing up. "I couldn't even get him to tell me, he had to write it down"
Alice gave her a gentle hug "Oh my God, what is it? It sounds serious!"
Daisy nodded "Ted is a girl trapped in a boy's body. He makes love like a woman, he acts like a woman, he IS a woman, but he's terrified to let anybody know because he's been hurt so badly in the past."
Alice was puzzled "OK, he is effeminate, even feminine! But a girl trapped in a boy's body, that seems crazy, even delusional. Still, I've read a couple things about it in my psych books, I'll look into it and see what I can find out"
Daisy nodded "You can't let ANYONE know what you know. Ted would know I told you and he would probably hate me if word got out."
Alice agreed "I won't tell anyone now, but I may have to talk to my advisor."
That afternoon, Alice started doing some research. She found some articles on "Gender Identity Disorder" and "Gender Identity Psychosis". She realized that Gender Identity Psychosis was an older term used in the 1950s and 1960s, "Gender Identity Disorder" was newer, starting around 1972 or so. Soon she had read about 20 articles on both conditions. This was way beyond her abilities, but she had to tread carefully. Telling the wrong people could destroy Ted's life, maybe even his mind.
Just before dinner, Alice saw Daisy walking across the quad. "Daisy, we need to talk"
Daisy and Alice went down to the student lounge and found a quiet corner where they wouldn't be disturbed. Alice pulled out her notebook and told Daisy to do the same "If they think we are studying, nobody will bother us."
Daisy was puzzled "Why all the cloak and dagger?"
Alice leaned in. "I spent the afternoon doing research. It turned out that when Ted was in elementary school, the treatment for Gender Identity Psychosis was something out of a horror movie. Being shocked with electrodes to the brain. They wake up disoriented, terrified, and unable to remember anything for days or even weeks, except the pain. Then they are strapped into a chair. Electrodes are inserted down there. The patient is then fed drugs to make him nauseous and frightened, then they play a movie of erotica and shock him with excruciating voltages every time he appears to be aroused. Then they are locked in a bright room flooded with loud music so they can't sleep. The next morning, the whole process starts all over - they usually did this for 90 days."
Daisy winced "That's why no one would talk to him. They didn't want him to have to go through that!"
Alice nodded "Who wouldn't talk to him?"
Daisy saddened "His parents, his psychologist, his therapist. Every time he mentioned it, they refused to even talk about it."
Alice looked worried "You might have a problem. You have a GIRLFRIEND who can't transition because they will lock her up and kill her or lobotomize her, but if she doesn't get to be a girl at all, he will probably kill herself within a few years.
Daisy was shocked. "They still do that?"
Alice held Daisy "No. But now, they will give them huge doses of drugs that make them unable to think. Drugs like Haldol and Thorazine. Essentially, it's a chemical straight jacket. Its main purpose is to keep him from hurting himself.
"Hurting himself? How?" Daisy was puzzled.
Alice rocked, she bit her lip. "I need you to do something for me. Find out if he has ever tried to hurt himself? Has he tried to castrate himself or commit suicide, especially during or after puberty? I'd rather ask him myself, but I'm afraid that he would realize that you told me about his girl side. He'd never trust me. He'd never trust you either."
Daisy stared into space "I'll try. This just got very complicated."
That night, Daisy saw Ted walking toward the cafeteria from the quad. She ran to catch up with him "Hey Ted, wait up"
Ted smiled big. "Hi Daisy, I'm glad to see you. I wasn't sure you'd want to after last night!"
Daisy smiled "What, and miss amazing sex with my best girl? No way!"
Ted giggled and tilted his head "Good, I'll be happy to do what you love so much. Got a guy lined up for after yet?"
Daisy winked "Might have! Let you know in a bit."
Ted put her arm around her waist "Just be careful. I don't want you getting hurt."
Daisy grabbed his waist. "You're amazing, you know that?"
Ted squealed "Really! I had no idea!"
The two flirted with each other through dinner. Alice made a point of joining them, but among the other spectators, she didn't stand out much. She watched as the girls teased Ted about being one of the girls, as Ted almost beamed. She watched as Mike made fun of Ted's femininity - watch
ing Ted go cold as ice. Throughout the whole dinner, it was obvious that Ted was on an emotional roller coaster.
Alice decided to emerge from the group. She looked at the guy who had been putting Ted down.
"Well Mike, I think it's not only cute, but kind of sexy. Ted is sweet, nice, gentle, and he's got a cute ass"
The other girls giggled.
Mike took the challenge "Nice ass for a GIRL!"
Alice just smiled and winked at Ted. Had she overplayed it?
Daisy had noticed the roller-coaster too. She'd made a date with Mike for that night. She whispered in his ear "Looks like I will be busy later. Sorry Mike"
Then she turned to Ted "Your room, NOW!"
Ted gave a bashful smile and very politely said "Yes ma'am, as you wish"
The girls watched with awe as Ted obediently got up and took Daisy's hand, watching her almost drag him out of the room. Whatever it was about Ted, Daisy couldn't wait much longer.
Alice turned to Mike "You're a real prick! I bet you think you're a hot stud!"
Just that moment, Sherry waved with her little finger. All the girls started giggling. They all knew that little finger meant "He's so selfish it might as well be as big as my little finger!"
Alice got up and went to her room. Mike continued to flirt with the girls. Maybe one of them would take him to her room for a quickie. Maybe they could get him to buy drinks or even a dinner date on Friday night.
Investigation
When they reached Ted's room, Daisy practically tackled him with a kiss, knocking him onto the bed.
"Love it when you do that!"
"Do what?" Daisy tried to look as innocent as possible
Ted giggled "When you take charge and sweep me off my feet like that."
Daisy gave him an impish little grin "I've got a surprise for you, but you need to shower first"
Ted squealed! "Oh no! You'll see me almost naked!" Then he giggled, grabbed a couple towels and a robe, and headed for the shower.
While Ted was gone, Daisy went through his drawers. It took only a few minutes for her to find the drawer with the girl clothes. There were a few pairs of panties, pantyhose, and two bras. She looked at the other clothes and realized that the jeans Ted regularly wore were girl’s jeans, for a curvy figure, with a flared leg. She quickly looked in his closet and found a girl's blouse that was probably Ted's size. She was surprised that she hadn't found any skirts, then she found one under the pants folded in the drawer. There were also 4 leotards, that were obviously women's, hanging in the closet. She realized that some of the pantyhose in the drawers were probably dance tights, but the sheer tights worn by girls.
Then Daisy got ready for Ted. She took off her skirt and blouse, wearing stockings, garter belt, and bra, with panties over garters. A previous day, in his room, she had seen a magazine next to the bed, open to a page with a girl dressed like this, and Daisy hoped Ted would like it.
When Ted walked back into the room, he froze. Daisy was a size 12, not fat, beautifully curvy. To Ted, she was so beautiful. To see Daisy in this amazing outfit was almost too much!
Daisy handed him a pair of his own panties, which Ted put on immediately.
She then laid down on the bed, and said "Tie me up, NOW!"
Ted tied her wrists to the bed and started to tie her leg. As he reached for the second leg, Daisy giggled "don't you want to take off my panties off first?"
Ted thought for a full minute. "I guess that would make a few things easier."
He slid the panties off her free leg and down her bound leg. Then he tied the free leg.
Daisy smiled "I want you to do anything you want to with me. No restrictions"
Ted leaned over her on the bed, holding his weight off her, and kissed her gently. Daisy closed her eyes and immediately began to see, not Ted, but a beautiful woman, caressing her slowly as Ted was doing, kissing her in all the right places, no rush to any of her actions, kissing gently, then nibbling. Kissing every part of her rather than rushing directly to breasts or crotch. Daisy had seen a few porn movies with Tommy, so she had seen the girl on girl scenes too. She realized how totally feminine Ted was being.
Ted continued to tease Daisy for almost thirty minutes before Daisy wanted more. "PLEASE stop teasing me!"
Ted giggled "You asked for it".
For the next hour, Ted pushed Daisy higher and higher. What was amazing is that Ted seemed to understand how caressing the stockings at just the right moment, in just the right way, made it feel like he was caressing her entire leg. Daisy went into climax after climax, and she wasn't quiet about it. A couple of kids in nearby rooms started giggling. Ted pushed Daisy to new heights and soon she was moaning so loudly that one of the kids knocked on the door. "Are you alright in there? Should I call the police?"
Daisy yelled out "HELL NO, DON'T CALL THE POLICE!".
The girls walked away giggling.
Daisy couldn't believe how excited she was, or how much pleasure she was having. And the whole time, the closest Ted had come to anything remotely like intercourse was when he pressed his thigh between her stocking covered legs. That was amazing. What SHE did with her mouth and hands was even more amazing.
Finally, Daisy couldn't stand it anymore. "If you don't stop that right now, I'm going to ride you the second I get loose."
Teddie giggled and in a sweet voice said, "One more time!" Then she giggled.
Daisy didn't know what hit her. Ted was taking her to a new peak and not letting her down. SHE had found the G-spot and even the P-spot, but Daisy could feel her caressing her cervix with her fingers and it was making her wild. She couldn't STOP coming. Finally, she ground down, and she could feel the fluid coming out of her.
Ted finally backed off. Daisy started to shiver. Ted released the ties and quickly climbed into bed and gave her a big hug as she broke down and cried. They just cuddled for a good hour before Daisy could even speak.
"What the heck was that thing with the squirting?"
Ted giggled "You ejaculated. That's what it's like for a guy, but guys don't get a warm-up"
Daisy groaned "No WONDER guys are so crazy about it!"
Ted smiled and looked her in the eye. "So, you liked it?"
Daisy nodded "I LOVED it. I love you too!"
Ted didn't even hesitate "I love you too."
Dysphoria and Puberty
Daisy snuggled up to him. "You could have lost your virginity tonight, why didn't you at least try?"
Ted was very calm "I don't really want to do that. I'm not terribly fond of what's down there?"
Daisy kissed him "You don't like it?"
Ted nodded "I hate it, especially the balls. I always have"
Daisy remembered Alice's request "Have you ever tried to hurt them?"
Ted looked at the ceiling "Yes, I knew what they would do to me. I was 11 when they showed up, and I didn't want them. I did everything I could to keep them from turning me into a man, a bass, a hairy beast."
Daisy snuggled closer "What did you do?"
"I went to the library to see if I could find a way to castrate myself. I had tried to cut my sac with an X-acto knife, but it hurt too much. I realized I'd bleed to death or pass out before I was done."
Daisy hugged him, "go on"
"I read that Shepherds castrate sheep by putting their testes in rubber bands. I tried using a few, but nothing happened, so I added a bunch more. I even tried tying them with string or heavy thread. I was in pain for a few weeks, but the lust rushes told me it wasn't working."
Daisy poked her head up "Lust rushes?"
"When men see a woman that sexually excites them, they get a testosterone rush. It makes you feel like your whole body is on fire, you want to track, to follow, to pounce. It's exciting for a few seconds, but then I would feel the horrible despair, wishing I could BE the woman I was looking at. I was excited by what she was wearing, how she did her hair, how she did her makeup, her posture, her walk, I even noticed her shoes or boots. Knowing the rus
h meant I was becoming a man made it something to be cursed and hated."
Daisy was stunned "Oh. Is that what happened when you walked in on me in my sexy outfit?"
Ted smiled and nodded "For a minute. But then when you had me put the panties on, I just let the girl take over. All that fire went into pleasing you, but NOT with what was between my legs."
Daisy had hit gold "What else did you do?"
Ted went up into space "Several times I tried to poach them."
Daisy tried to look him in the eye "Poach them?"
"Yes, I would bring boiling water into the bathroom and pour it over the nuts while I was in the tub. I got some blisters, but I still got the rushes. I even tried to crush them"
Daisy winced "I'm afraid to ask!"
Ted still stared into space, "I knew I wouldn't be able to do the job completely unless I got both, and I didn't dare do one at a time. So, I used a two-by-four positioned over both, and hit it with a sledgehammer."
Daisy groaned out in pain "That's terrible!"
Ted nodded "I realized I wouldn't be doing it again. I only did THAT once!"
Daisy winced "And you still got the rushes?"
"Yes. I also tried ice packs, even dry ice. Apparently, they were determined little shits"
Daisy was about to cry "So what happened"
Ted started to break "I got tall, my feet got big, and worst of all, I was a bass"
Daisy nodded "That must have been really hard for you"
Ted nodded "It was. As soon as the Choir teacher told me I was a bass, all I saw was 70 to 90 more years of being miserable, alone, imprisoned in my horrible male body. 70 to 90 years of solitary confinement, with no possibility of parole.” Ted’s voice was filled with despair.
Ted suddenly got very calm, “I started drinking and drugging. I would mix combinations of booze, pot, antihistamines, and Valium to try and overdose. It seems that overdose is nearly impossible for me. I would go into black-outs. I thought I just passed out, but apparently, I was very active. Sometimes, I would castrate a guy verbally, or kiss his girlfriend to start a fight that could have gotten me killed."
Religious Liberty On Trial Page 5