Transitions

by David Connor

  Billy: Really?

  Apparently, he was as surprised by her response as she was.

  Erika: Just send it before I change my mind.

  She closed the door and then turned on the bathroom light, suddenly impatient herself, as the picture seemed to be taking forever to arrive. Perched on the edge of the small counter, she imagined Billy experimenting with a variety of angles, trying for the one that would make it look the biggest. She also imagined Tom Alan pummeling Milo, and then her, right there on the vanity. Finally, the phone dinged. Before looking down, Erika glanced toward the window, into the dark summer night and straight at Milo as he walked from one side of the black and white bedroom to the other in his teal boy shorts. He whipped them off, twirled them over his head on one finger, then flung them toward the all-white bed. His hard-on swayed as he strutted back to Tom Alan, who sat on a chest in front of him in nothing but a T-shirt long enough to cover his lap.

  “What the hell?” Erika never really used that bathroom. “Oh.” The way the house was built, that bedroom jutted out with its own terrace and wrap-around patio doors. If one didn’t draw the drapes, which neither Tom Alan nor Milo had bothered to do, anyone in the half-bath could stare out that window straight in. “You’ve got to be kidding me! I can’t escape it.” The view was crystal clear. When Tom Alan stood and they started to dance, wrapped in each other’s arms, Erika envied the playfulness and romance that returned now that they were home. She had taken to reading gay erotica, a secret vice she kept from Milo and Tom Alan.

  When her phone buzzed again, she finally looked down at the message that had come before the new one. Instead of Billy’s hard dick, there was his handsome mug, eyes closed, lips in a pucker. She swiped it away to see what had followed, not because she wouldn’t like to kiss him, but in that moment she wanted to see Billy’s hard-on—and maybe Tom Alan’s—if she dared glance in that direction again.

  Billy: Hey. Say something.

  Just words.

  Erika: Nice.

  Billy: Disappointed?

  Erika: Pleasantly surprised.

  Billy: It’s not my Coke.

  Billy: Shit!

  Billy: *cock.

  Erika laughed softly.

  Erika: It’s not? :p I like what I got.

  Billy: I’d love the chance to kiss you again.

  Erika felt a tingle between her legs. Was it Billy’s words or what was happening across the backyard?

  Erika: Why all of a sudden?

  Erika glanced outward in time to catch an unobstructed view of Tom Alan pressed to the door by Milo from behind. She swore she would watch just a moment, but she couldn’t look away. Right against the glass, Tom Alan’s huge erection folded upward. His Ani and Otouto T-shirt rose to show his hairy six pack when he reached up toward the ceiling as if under arrest. Tom Alan had lots of hair, albeit light, and sometimes hard to see. She could feel it though, if…when…Billy’s torso was nearly bare, with just a red strip of fur that started at his navel and went wild at the top of his dick. He’d shaved it all off once, because that’s what the Internet said women liked.

  Not Erika. She imagined it wild and bushy again as she pulled the curtains across the small window.

  Erika: Show me more.

  She put her hand to the spot that was tingling under her nightgown and closed her eyes, imagining Billy jerking off back at his apartment. The recollection of Tom Alan naked and hard kept fighting through as well. She combined the two and nearly climaxed.

  Billy: I wish I could cum over.

  Erika: It’s late.

  Her fingers working up inside her, she’d be finished before he could get there.

  Buzz.

  Erika received a picture of Billy’s gut, the red stripe, down to where it first got real plush, with just the smallest glimpse of the waistband of his store-brand underwear.

  Erika: Tease.

  Billy: :) Changing your mind?

  Erika: Show me the big red stick.

  Billy: What do I get in return?

  Erika: I could send a pic of Tom Alan and Milo.

  Erika: I can see them out the window.

  She pulled back the curtain, aimed her phone, as a silly gag, and snapped.

  “Fuck! Frick, I mean.” She hopped down from the sink and peered out between the two widths of curtain. “Dang it!” Milo was looking. He had his hands to his eyes, searching out straight ahead. Tom Alan was behind him at first, hulking enough to see out over Milo’s head, but then he stepped to the side. The T-shirt was off. He was totally naked. Since Erika could see them quite clearly, one could only assume they could probably see her, too. She pressed flat to the wall, as not to give herself away, flicked off the light and peeked from the side. Neither guy even glanced in her direction. They looked upward—both Tom Alan and Milo—toward the heavens. For what, Erika wondered, a UFO? She recalled an e-book about two country farmers and an alien orgy. She was pretty sure she was going to get Milo the paperback for Christmas.

  Whatever they thought they saw, it didn’t matter, as both turned away and walked farther into the room that no doubt reeked of men and sex. Erika was wet, and she fantasized about joining them. She also imagined bringing Billy, when the vibration of the phone, which she seriously considered pressing to herself with only the thickness of silk in between, reminded her she’d left him hanging.

  Billy: See them what? Fucking?

  Then he asked her twice if she was still there.

  Erika: Sorry. Not fucking yet, but getting there. Want proof?

  She inhaled deeply as she found the corner of the vanity. Billy didn’t answer, so she reached out to him again, sending him the grainy image she had snapped along with the tearful laughing emoji.

  Erika: Naked guys are hot. Hint hint.

  Billy: Three at a time?

  She gasped, from her touch and the vision Billy put in her head.

  Erika: Sure.

  Billy: I can’t really see anything.

  Erika: I wish I could smell it.

  Did she send that? Yes. It was there when she checked.

  Erika: And taste you.

  Good save?

  Billy: I offered to cum.

  As frustrating as the push and pull with Billy could be, Erika was glad it was all about sex. In another moment, of course, she’d be wishing for more. Until she figured out how to handle what she felt for Tom Alan, however, something she should have done already—it had been two freaking years—anything more would just make matters worse. Still, she suddenly felt guilty about leading Billy on, and also about spying on the guys. “Milo always claims self-reproach comes after coming, not before,” she whispered to the darkened mirror.

  Buzz.

  Billy: How’s that?

  He’d sent a selfie, naked and full on in a floor-length mirror. His hard cock had a curve she’d always loved.

  Erika: Mmm. :)

  She was going to come for sure now, as she backed up into the squared-off marble edge. It was nice—Billy’s bowed dick—and though two fingers was all she had handy to approximate it, Erika could still recall how it filled her and brought her all the way.

  Billy: Cum to me? No strings? No expectations?

  Erika’s inhale seemed way too loud to her ears. Exes with benefits…nothing more. The text pissed her off. She was the mother of his child. There would always be something more. The hard breath hadn’t only come from aggravation. She’d gotten off on her own, bucking against her hand and where the countertop was now warm and sticky. Burning with intense pleasure and shivering uncontrollably, she found herself humming a long, orgasmic note that somehow became part of a Celine Dion melody. “Shit.” Erika smoothed out her hair, quite the tangled mess once done. Her free hand spent a lot of time in it, something Billy would often do. She was thankful the light was off. Her reflection was not something she really wanted to see.

  Erika: G’night Billy I have to hit the shower.

  Billy: Good night? Are we done?

  Eri
ka: I am. ;) Thank you.

  Billy: You…?

  Erika: Women do it too. Your turn. Tell me tomorrow how it goes.

  Billy: Hey!!!!!!!

  Erika: Or make me a video.

  Erika: Wet dreams.

  Erika: *sweet. :)

  Her heart hurt a little, despite playing it all off as teasing. The constant seesawing of emotions was as dizzying as her fastest scratch spin. Something had to give, and soon.

  Chapter 4

  Billy called first thing the next morning, before six. Erika wondered if he was going to yell at her for leaving him frustrated. All things being equal, it was a lousy thing to do. “Hey, I—”

  “I know it’s early. Booger said you were up.”

  Haya-oki wa sanmon no toku. The early bird gets the worm. Nobuo Tsuchino had bandied that phrase about quite often as well.

  “For quite a while, actually.” Erika had dreamt of her late father just before dawn. It felt like something meaningful. “You talked to Milo already?”

  “I did.”

  “To complain about last night, or is that what this is for?” Erika asked, voice softening. “Because I really could have handled that better.”

  “No. This is serious.”

  “Oh.” She sat on the foot of the bed and braced herself. “You okay? Your parents? Your brothers and—”

  “Yes, Rika. Everyone’s okay. Well, not everyone. I got here first thing this morning—cleaning day.”

  Billy had to be at The Mischen Rink before sunrise a couple days a week. He traded labor for rental fees, so his hockey teams could practice for free. “I got out of my truck and found Jesse sleeping right outside. She’s run away from home.”

  “Dang.”

  “Dang?”

  “I don’t curse anymore.” Erika pulled a yellow tank top over her sports bra. “Is she okay?”

  “She’s not saying much.”

  There was a knock then. “Kiki? You decent?”

  “Yeah. Come in.”

  Tom Alan opened the door. “Didn’t want to catch you in your undies.”

  After what she’d watched just hours ago, Erika was pummeled by shame, as Tom Alan stood before her in his boxers, smelling all musky and manly.

  “Milo gone?”

  “Yup.” Tom Alan frowned.

  Milo was taking a couple of morning classes a week to complete his degree.

  “Billy says Jesse ran away. He found her at the rink.”

  “Crud. I just got another text from Kensuke. Number eight.” Tom Alan still had his phone in his hand. “He’s kind of freaking out ‘cause she won’t answer his calls.”

  “I doubt he’s that upset, considering how he’s glommed onto you.”

  Tom Alan frowned again, but didn’t reply.

  “Jesse claims they split—and it’s all Tom Alan’s fault. That much she did say,” Billy reported.

  “Oh no.”

  “What?” Tom Alan asked.

  “Nothing. Well…something.”

  “What do I do, Rika? I don’t even know how to parent a one-and-a-half-year-old, let alone a teenager.”

  “Because we’re not much older…as I recall you saying.”

  “True. Right now, she’s in the locker room taking a nice, hot shower. We’re gonna hit Dunkin’ Donuts for breakfast, then maybe you can talk to her…ya know, woman to woman…unless that’s sexist.”

  Erika allowed a brief smile.

  “Let her know breaking up with a gay guy isn’t the end of the world.”

  “I’ll give it a shot.” She realized she might have to lie.

  * * * *

  Billy and Jesse were back from Dunkin’ Donuts by the time Tom Alan and Erika arrived for training. Kensuke had sent a million texts in the meantime, including a dick pic, as the devil side had once more taken charge.

  “Whatever you do, don’t scroll down,” Erika had said, taking in a smirk, a bare chest, and a belly button.

  “Don’t plan on it.”

  Tom Alan scolded Kensuke vigorously from the driver’s seat, his fingers moving fast, his nostrils flaring. Kensuke apologized then, but also begged to come by the rink, claiming to be upset by Jesse’s actions. “I told him you and I were too busy practicing.” Tom Alan smiled at Kyoko as she gently danced side to side with Etsuko in her arms in the parking lot. “And that our coach is a tyrant.”

  “I do not usually allow spectators when we have the ice, especially this time of year. The season starts soon. Fifteen minutes!” Her words to her team were no less strict before handing off Etsuko and making her exit. “Your transitions still need a great deal of work. And whatever is going on with the jump, it needs to be fixed.”

  “Yes, Mother.”

  Jesse sipped from her paper cup. “What are transitions?”

  Kyoko explained the nuances of choreography and figure skating as Jesse’s green eyes bore a hole through Tom Alan. “The moves between the jumps and the spins that add to the artistry.”

  “Oh.”

  “Etsuko and Dada gotta get on the road.” Billy reached for her, then turned her toward the door. “Dada? Dada?”

  “She’ll think the door is ‘dada.’” Tom Alan was a wise guy.

  “Go with Dada?” Billy pointed at himself. “Dada?”

  Etsuko said nothing.

  “She’s been a little grouchy…not sleeping well…the teeth.”

  “We’ll deal. We have a big day ahead of us, huh, Sweet-ums? The park, the zoo, my parents’ to see Brianna, Benny and all four mutts. That’ll put you in a good mood.”

  Erika laughed. “That might be a lot for one day.”

  “I love spending time with my baby girl. Thanks for including me in your plans for a change…the trip…so I could.” The jab was intentional and it hurt, just like he’d planned. Then Billy let her have it again. “Now that we’re back, I’ll be sure to stay in my place.” Yeah, that was definitely about the night before.

  “Billy…”

  “I’ll catch up with you later.” He offered a kiss on the cheek. Erika put her hand there. “Sorry. Force of habit.”

  “Wait.” She took his arm. “Just for a second.” Turning to her mother, she asked if it was okay if Jesse spent the day.

  Kyoko looked to her daughter, and then to the upset younger girl with her head down, staring at her phone, which hadn’t made a peep. “If she’d like. You are familiar with the ice?”

  “I, um, play hockey,” Jesse said softly.

  “Maybe we’ll get you in a pair of figure skates. You’re a pretty girl. You’d make a beautiful flower.”

  Jesse pursed her lips. “Pass.”

  “No,” Kyoko said. “You will not pass. You are here on a work day and will do as I say.”

  “Sorry, Mrs. Tukina.” The name was a tough one.

  “You may call me Kyoko.” She held out her hand, and once the two were off to the back room for skates, Erika tried again with Billy, still mouthing “dada” to his daughter.

  “Did you talk to Jesse’s parents?”

  “Grandmother,” Billy said. “Jesse had told her she was spending the night with a friend. And get this, the mother’s in jail and the father is out of the picture. The grandmother sounded nice, but exhausted. She made a point to tell me she was nearly in her seventies, like keeping up with a teenager was something long past her capabilities now, ya know.”

  “Dang!”

  “‘Dang.’” Billy snorted. “I’m not sure I’ll ever get used to that.

  Erika smiled. Billy didn’t return it.

  “Anyway, I wish I woulda known some of this before. I maybe coulda…I don’t know.”

  “Did she open up at all about the walking sack of hormones in a hoodie?”

  “Not much. She put in her ear buds and ignored me most of the time, which was perfectly fine. I’m not as good with women as I thought, I guess.” Billy smiled then—or was it a sneer? “I better get,” he said, all movie western cowboy. “Jesse’s grandmother said she can hang here as long a
s she wants, not in those words, but I got the feeling she could use the break.”

  “That’s sad.” Tom Alan joined them. “Kind of reminds me of how we met.” His hand was on Erika’s elbow. “‘Don’t bother bringing him back,’ remember?”

  Erika took his other hand in hers. The scars were still present—many of them literal. Erika could tell he was back there off and on throughout the whole day. Kyoko snapped a few times, but kept most of her attention on Jesse, who actually came out of her shell a bit, even giggling a couple of times as Kyoko raised and lowered her arms with the grace of a ballerina. Jesse’s style—if she even had any—was more athletic. She tried a couple of jumps once training was over, and laughed hard when she fell, dangling like a puppet from the jumping harness Tom Alan manned. The cables and pulleys tugged at Erika’s heartstrings. The safety device used to assist novice skaters, or seasoned ones when trying something new like a quadruple flip, played a large part in Billy and Erika’s first meeting. Tom Alan and Milo’s, too.

  “Again?” Tom Alan asked.

  Jesse had even forgiven him. She was having a blast—until Kensuke showed up toward dusk.

  “I told you not to come,” Tom Alan snapped.

  “I know, dude, but I had to see you.”

  “You need to cut the crap,” Tom Alan told him. “Not only am I as good as married, I could also go to jail for possessing that picture you sent.”

  “You’re not going to jail,” Kensuke said smugly. “And I know you looked.”

  “You sent him a dick pic?” Jesse was in front of them in a flash. She shoved Kensuke hard, and since he was standing on ice in sneakers, he went down. “Asshole—which would have been the next one, right? I know the order.”

  “Young lady!” Jesse flinched at Kyoko’s raised voice. “We do not tolerate violence in this arena.”

  Jesse stared a moment, up into Kyoko’s stern face. Then she broke down sobbing, and skated toward the back of the rink.

  “This building and what it represents is precious to all of us,” Kyoko said to Kensuke. “I will not put up with your nonsense for a second. Not one. Is that understood?”

  Kensuke nodded, for once short on words. Tom Alan made it even clearer. “Behave or leave.”

  “Alright. I…” Kensuke’s voice may have cracked. “I’ll be good.”