Marshall: Mayfair Model Series

by Castle, Claire

  “No, don’t even suggest it. Funny story here.” I pointed at my drawings. “Ah, how long have you been collecting them?”

  Marshall’s brows creased. “I don’t know. A few years, I guess. You seem quite interested in them. Do you want to collect them too?”

  “Okay, I’ll put you out of your misery, laddie. I am S. Keeley, artiste extraordinaire. Keeley was my favourite dog that had belonged to my neighbour when I was young.” As I stared at his face, it was hard to decipher what he was thinking.

  His brows creased and then he frowned. Then a smile transformed his face. Pushing his hands through his hair, he looked from me to the drawings and back to me. Jess came over, seemingly distressed by his behaviour. He petted Jess absently, then said, “You were already amazing in my eyes, and now you’re telling me that you’re my favourite artist ever? Wow.”

  I jumped up and leaned in to hug him with Jess between us. “Oh, Marshall, that was so romantic.” I made smacking sounds as I plastered big kisses on his face.

  “Oi, get off me.” He folded his arms across his chest and let out a huff. “I am not,” he tried to say convincingly, though I saw one side of his mouth creep up.

  Not able to stop, I continued to cajole him. “Awww, Moody Marshall is really just a big softie.” I pulled my phone out of my back pocket. “Maybe I should send a story tip to the gossip mags.” I pretended to type in a website address.

  He lunged towards me and there was a commotion as Jess jumped off the seat and barked, jumping around us. “Get over here.”

  “Now, now. Don’t go back to Moody Marshall ’til I’ve sent my email.” I slid in my socks into the kitchen, just as he wrapped his arms around me from behind. I felt his breath on my neck and then he kissed me. Turning to face him, I kissed him quickly and smiled.

  “You really are nothing but trouble.” Marshall’s face was close to mine with an intense look in his eyes. “But trouble, I most definitely want to get in.”

  I put my hands on either side of his face and moved in to kiss him. Languidly I pulled him in closer and darted my tongue out. He opened for me as I caressed the stubble on his cheeks.

  As the kiss continued, he was happy to explore and our tongues clashed. The kiss turned more urgent and hotter with each moment that passed. He pushed his hands through my hair and broke away to let out a little sigh. “How is it I can’t resist you?” he said, almost to himself.

  I walked around him and took a few steps away. Then I removed my shirt and swivelled my hips. I started to undo my jeans when a knock came at the door. I immediately did up my jeans while Jess barked and ran around. I glanced at Marshall who appeared to be in an absolute panic. His face was pale and his eyes had shuttered over.

  Without even looking at me, he pushed me into a room and slammed the door shut. No words were spoken. I realized I had no shirt on, so I opened a random drawer and, fuck, nothing there.

  What could I do but try to listen through the door? For sure, it was a woman’s voice. But the sounds were distant and muffled. Then Marshall raised his voice. Shit, I hoped Jess wasn’t scared. Maybe I should have picked her up. Not that I was given a chance.

  God, who would have thought my life would come to me hiding in Marshall Easton’s bedroom. What would happen if I just strutted out there? But no, I couldn’t. I had no idea who Marshall was talking to, and it was obvious that he wasn’t pleased to see them.

  Eventually the raised voices stopped, and I waited. And waited. Then I heard talking, but it was only Marshall’s voice. Maybe they went outside or something. Then his voice got closer and sounded resigned. Despite there being nothing but silence, I wasn’t sure if I should go out or not. I decided to hell with it, partly because I was freezing and partly because I had no idea what was going on with Jess. I hoped she was okay.

  As I opened the door, I listened. Nothing. Not even Jess padding over to me. That was strange. I tiptoed out into the living room, feeling like an intruder. Oh, my god, what if someone kidnapped them. There went my imagination. I should really blame Jamieson. He’d told me some really over-the-top stories about celebrities and musicians that I wasn’t sure I believed.

  Then I saw Marshall cowered in a corner of the kitchen with Jess licking his face. “Marshall?” I bent down next to him. “What happened?” No response.

  He looked over and blinked. “Oh, Stuart. You should go. Just go.” He looked back down and petted Jess some more.

  I started to talk.

  “Go, Stuart. This was a ridiculous idea. Forget me. I’ll make sure the dog walking agency pays you a year’s salary, but you’ll have to get another job.” He gritted his teeth and stared at me. Much as he’d been moody and given me some looks, he had never given me that look. He spat the words out, making him sound evil.

  Although it might be an idiotic idea, I wasn’t giving up that easily. I wasn’t exactly known for backing down. Edging closer, Jess jumped onto my lap. Marshall didn’t seem to have any reaction. When I reached for his arm, he sighed, but didn’t pull away.

  “Who was that?” I asked. I rubbed his arm as I petted Jess’s back. I waited—letting him know I was there. Marshall was hunched over even more now. It was a sure sign he wasn’t really lashing out at me, but I just happened to be in the firing line.

  “The housekeeper was just coming to check on the house and make sure everything was in order. I guess she thought she had time before we got here. I’m sorry for my panic mode at first. It’s a gut reaction or something.”

  I bent down to sit beside him. “Okay, look, I can relate to this one.”

  His head turned and he looked like he didn’t believe me for a second.

  “No, really. Okay, so I was fifteen at the time, but still.” I laughed thinking back to it. “My mum’s kind of a worry-wart, I’m sure I told you, but anyway, back then she wasn’t ... I’m not sure what changed. Okay, so … back then, I was exploring my sexuality or whatever, and I liked checking out the guys discreetly, not any girls, like my friends. So my mum was at work and nae due back for at least six hours. I’d brought home my friend, Nathaniel.” I made air quotes on the word friend. “It’s hard to explain, but we both knew we wanted each other, I think, or whatever version of wanting you experience at that age. So, we’re in the living room and just kissing and touching when I hear the keys rattle in the door. Well, I practically threw poor Nathaniel into my bedroom at the back of the house. I walked back out, trying to pretend as if everything was normal. Mum gave me a look like she knew exactly what I’d been up to. But me being me, I asked her why she was back so early, wondering how I’d get Nathaniel out.”

  “There wasn’t a window? Maybe he could have jumped out?”

  “Well, that room had been converted into my bedroom, and it just had a tiny window that you’d barely get one leg through.”

  Marshall laughed. “Ha, ha! Seems this is our thing. The fire escape incident comes to mind.”

  He made an action as if to fist bump me and I was confused. “Uh?”

  “I made you laugh. So we should do something.”

  “Not that,” I said, shaking my head. “Okay, fine. Okay, but anyway, so while Mum starts cooking the slowest dinner ever, she made me set the table, then do laundry, and on and on. Hours passed. At one point I went back to put away my clothes only to find Nate was enjoying my room, seemingly not bothered at all. He even ate some of my favourite sweets—Bassett’s liquorice allsorts. But anyhow, after forever, my mum says, ‘I’ve called Nathaniel’s mum, he can stay for dinner, and if you’re having sex, be safe—and we better have “the talk” later.’”

  “No way.” He laughed again.

  “Yes, way.” I smiled. “So I stomped over to her and said, ‘You knew?’”

  “Of course, Stu. Mum’s know everything,” she’d replied.

  ‘Wow, so you didn’t get your fun, someone eats your sweets, and your mum tricked you. Bad day.”

  “I know, isnae that true. I’ll never forget it. But I heard you rai
se your voice too. You, ah, didn’t go overboard with her, did you?”

  No, ah, my mum called.” He closed his eyes and rubbed his thumb across his lips. Then he just stared at me as if he needed to say something.

  I had no idea what he was searching for, so instead, I said all I could, “Well, I’m here for you if you need to talk. I’m not going anywhere.”

  In the distance I heard cars driving past, the house creaked as if it were older, and a light snore came from Jess. What seemed like hours later, Marshall finally spoke.

  “It was my mum, as I said. She decided to phone me up and demand to know where I was at. She’s very nosey and thinks she should know everything about my life. Of course, I’m partly to blame because instead of any confrontation, I just let her walk all over me.” He sighed. “So she thought she should remind me again of her precious gala.” He put his head in his hands. “It was more just to check up on me. I’m sure she was digging for any dirt.”

  I caressed his arm, letting him know I was there.

  Looking up, he half-smiled at me. “I can walk the fashion runways of Milan and New York, and yet I’m scared of how my mum will react if I don’t do everything perfectly, the way she expects.” He leaned into me. “That’ll make a good story for the gossip mags.”

  I laughed. “Oh, I’m rubbing off on you. That’s some humour right there. Okay, but really, this sucks for you and I hate it. I can’t imagine having a mum like that. She’s really that bad, isn’t she?”

  “Unfortunately. I can only wish I was as important to her as her precious gala. She’s just so cold and impersonal whenever we talk or are together. Everything is for show: who can we be seen with? How can we make ourselves look the part?”

  He leaned his head back on the kitchen cabinet door and pulled his legs in to his chest. “I was so close to telling her, you know,” he said quietly. “Just telling her I’m gay and seeing what she’d say.” He stretched his legs out. “But I didn’t because I’m scared. As for the yelling, she was saying some really terrible things like why didn’t I have a girlfriend? Or how I’d let people down when I hurt my ankle. She likes to get in every evil dig she can, and it’s terrible because I let it get to me. I’m thirty, for fucks’ sake. She wanted to know who I was with right now. Imagine the look on her face if she had come here. Seeing you.” He looked up at me and ruffled my hair. “It would have some shock value, I couldn’t do that to you, though. You mean too much. But just so you know, if I had a stash of sweets, it wouldn’t be so easy to find.”

  I slapped him playfully and leaned across to give him a chaste kiss, then sighed. “She sounds like a piece of work. My mum annoys me, but I know she just worries. And she supports me as I am. So the question is …”

  He looked at me, obviously taking in every word and waiting on what I was about to say.

  “I’m not telling you when to come out to her. Believe me, you’ll know when the time is right for that.” I took his hands in mine. “Do you want to bitch about her some and vent? Or go for a walk with me and Jess, and then come back and vent while we eat our weight in ice cream and sweets?”

  A small laugh burst from him. “Maltesers?” His eyes got wide.

  “Of course. I can run into that corner shop we saw at the end of the road when we were coming in.”

  Marshall got up and Jess jumped off me. He put his hand out for me and as I grabbed it, we heard a noise outside. Jess started to bark crazily. “Another visitor? Should I run and hide?” I stood stock-still.

  “I’ll protect you, don’t worry,” he said as he peeked through the large bay window. “Looks like a branch is just hitting the side of the house.”

  “Okay, I know to lock myself in your bedroom. Now, let’s get changed and go out so we can actually enjoy our precious time here together.”

  I watched him as he got ready and admired his broad shoulders and narrow waist. When I looked back up, he was staring at me as well, and then he licked his lips. I put the lead on Jess and turned to look at him. “Okay, if you keep looking at me like that, we won’t be leaving. Save it for later though.”

  Marshall pulled a baseball cap low on his head. “Sorry, but who knows if my mum might have sent someone to spy. She wouldn’t really, but I’d prefer to not be recognized.”

  I took his hand. “It’s fine. I get it. And I promise to drop your hand as soon as we’re out on the road. Just two friends going for a walk.” I crossed my finger in an X shape across my heart.

  19

  MARSHALL

  I contemplated how my whole mood had changed simply by being in Stuart’s company. My demeanour had improved and it felt so good to make each other laugh. The banter flowed easily, and it was unlike anything I’d ever experienced with another person.

  Walking in the fresh air and being away from the city was refreshing; though having Stuart at my side but not holding his hand was pure torture. We strolled together while Jess trotted along on a small path that wandered parallel to the road.

  “It’s lovely out here,” Stuart said. “So peaceful. It reminds me of Inverochtie a bit. I love the city, don’t get me wrong, but this is nice too.” His hand brushed mine and I jumped to the side.

  “Sorry. Sorry. It’s not you. Well, it is, but … Fuck, I’m so shit at this.”

  “I just need to know one thing?” He turned to face me. “Do you want to … Do you wish you could hold my hand?” Stuart’s gaze didn’t waver as he asked me.

  “More than anything,” I told him.

  “Okay, then that’s all that matters.” He strutted ahead with Jess and I stared at the two of them. They were both so important to me, but at what cost? No, I wasn’t going to answer that, because they were worth it all, at any cost.

  “Come on, let’s go.”

  I took a few larger strides and caught up to them. “I’m going to, I mean … I want to be ready, you know, to be the true me. I know you don’t realize it, Stuart, but you’re making me need, no want, to be true to myself. I’ve been hiding because I’ve been scared. I am scared. But as the days go by, I’m starting to care less and less. One day, it’ll happen. I know it.”

  “Well, I never thought I’d be spending all this time holding out for a moody model, so that makes two of us.”

  We reached the town shop and I stayed outside with Jess, moving foot to foot as Stuart ran into the store. I was being ridiculous. If anyone did come up to me, I could just try and ignore them and speed up as usual. No, I knew that wasn’t my issue. I was afraid they’d know exactly what I’d gotten up to with Stuart, which was ridiculous since I wasn’t ashamed. I sighed as Jess let out a whimper. “It’s okay, Jess.” She licked my hand when I bent down to pet her.

  Just then, Stuart walked out armed with a large bag. “This,” he looked around and lowered his voice, seeing no one around, “is our stash. And we can work it off later. I got your favourite and mine—liquorice allsorts, always has to be Bassett’s.” He winked and started to walk towards the cottage.

  How could I not smile at his joy? I couldn’t even remember the last time I had laughed so much and took part in humour and whimsy. “Wait, did you get mint chocolate chip ice cream,” I called to him.

  “Wait and see.” He chuckled.

  Back at the cottage, we got inside and made sure Jess had food. She was quite happy to jump into the bed in the corner.

  I pulled Stuart to me, having to touch him, to be close. I nuzzled into his neck and breathed him in. “Oh baby, I just I need to hold you. After my behaviour earlier and all my stupid insecurities, I feel like an idiot. Thank you for giving me time.”

  “Who are you? Is the ice king’s heart melting? You’re scaring me. Go back to my moody model.” Stuart smiled, letting me know he was teasing me. “The fresh air must be getting to you.” He kissed my nose then. “Let’s enjoy every minute together. And don’t be so hard on yourself. I can wait. I have a feeling you’ll be worth it somehow.”

  I stood frozen on the spot and thought, I really ho
pe so. I hoped I could prove that I was worthy of him. “Yes, our own little secluded hideaway. Want to make a blanket fort and eat our treats?”

  He grinned at me. “What? Are we five? Yes, let’s go for it.” Jess looked at us like we were crazy as I ran to the spare room to grab pillows and blankets. When I came back out to the living room, Stuart had stripped down to his boxer shorts, and with his mussed hair sticking out every which way, he looked delectable.

  “Okay, stop staring. Come on.” He walked over to me and took some of the covers. “Have you done this before? I remember once I made one, outside under the stars, and my mum was looking for me everywhere. I guess I freaked her out when she couldn’t find me.” He looked up at me, waiting.

  “I, ah, never got to. Toys were to be played with at certain times, and you wouldn’t use sheets and pillows for a fort.” I tried my best to impersonate the posh nanny’s voice from decades ago.

  He came over and hugged me. “Oh, Marshall. We really will make up for lost time. Now strip down and grab a pillow,” he said, shoving one in my hand.

  I took it as I bounced around on one foot, trying to flick my jeans off my ankles. I almost toppled over but managed to catch myself, and then I playfully swatted at Stuart with my pillow. He proceeded to hit me over the head and then I whacked him across his stomach.

  Dodging me, he managed to get around the other side of the sofa. I ran after him, but somehow he was nimble and too quick for me. Before I knew it, he was behind me and just as he reached out, I ducked and missed the hit.

  Jess started barking and running around. She stopped to put her paws on the windowsill to look outside, and then she continued to run back and forth around the house.

  I couldn’t stop laughing and eventually got hold of Stuart round the waist. I leaned him over the back of the sofa and draped my arm lightly on his back. “What am I going to do with you?” I kissed his back and then nipped his ear.