Sexy Hers

by Carly Phillips

  “No idea.” Landon shoved his hands into his pants pockets, his jaw working overtime. “But we can’t let him destroy everything we’ve worked for.”

  “Which is why you should have let me go after him instead of dragging my ass inside.” Tanner kicked the nearest thing to him, the trash can in the office. It spilled over, contents with it.

  “And that’s why we’re in here and you’re not beating Vic until he’s bloody and unconscious. Then we lose you to the system and we’re not fucking having it. Got it?” Jason asked him.

  He stood in Tanner’s face, unafraid of his temper because everyone understood Tanner’s anger was never ever directed at those he cared about. Only those who hurt him in ways he never overcame. Victor Clark was about the only person who could work him into that kind of rage these days.

  “Fuck.” He knew Jason was right.

  He also realized his friends hadn’t mentioned potentially losing the club. They weren’t worried about the business, they were worried about him. And he needed to get himself together so he didn’t let them down. Vic pushed his buttons like nobody’s business. But he had to learn to keep that demon in check, especially if the bastard was out of jail.

  He blew out a long breath and sat down in his seat. “I’m fine. You don’t need to worry.”

  “Did I see Scarlett here?” Jason asked.

  Tanner swallowed hard. “She was talking to Frank Rhodes. We grew up in the same neighborhood but now he’s a cop,” Tanner muttered. “Guy’s a prick. Always had it in for me. I liked a girl? He went after her. Just an all-around dick.” And the things he could tell her about him? Before he had a chance?

  Damn.

  “Maybe he was questioning her?” Landon suggested. “Like he thought she was in the club when the bomb threat came in?”

  Tanner shook his head. “It looked like they were acquaintances. And Frank knows all my secrets. Everything we buried.”

  “It’s not like we killed someone. Those secrets can’t destroy you.”

  He swallowed hard. “But given what I learned today, they can cost me Scarlett.” He ran a hand through his hair. “Her brother was killed in a convenience store robbery and the assholes got off on a technicality. She’s made it her mission to not let people work the system. Like we did for me.”

  “It was a legal way of going about things,” Jason reminded him. “An executive pardon. You went through a bad time after Levi died. We all did. You did your community service. You have no record. If Scarlett can’t forgive your past…”

  “She doesn’t deserve me. Yeah, yeah.” He drew a deep breath. “I’ll talk to her. And I’ll also have her find out how the hell Vic got out of prison.”

  The sound of a throat clearing interrupted them. “Excuse me.” The cop in charge of the bomb threat investigation stood in the office doorway, Rhodes by his side.

  “Yes. What can we do for you?” Jason asked.

  Tanner watched Frank warily.

  “I just wanted to let you know we’re finished for tonight. If you need us, give the station a call. Otherwise we’ll be in touch,” the man said.

  “Grayson.”

  Tanner folded his arms across his chest and met Frank’s gaze. “Scarlett? She’s too good for you. And now she knows all about you.”

  “Rhodes, let’s go,” his superior said.

  “My pleasure. My job here is done.”

  * * *

  Tanner walked into the gym, anger pouring through him in waves. Emotion he had to unleash before he went to see Scarlett. He wished he was just going to bring her lunch and everything was normal but it wasn’t. Vic was out of prison and she needed to know about his past and hear it from him.

  They strode through the large workout area. Because it was past nine a.m., most people were at work and the gym was on the quieter side. Although he ought to be exhausted, he’d gotten no sleep after the cops left and he and the guys talked late into the night, he was revving for a fight.

  “Come on. Let’s get some of this aggression out of you,” Landon, who’d been silent and let Tanner brood, said as they approached the big black bag in the corner.

  Tanner sat while Landon wrapped his hands, protecting his skin and knuckles from the beating he’d otherwise take, then slipped the gloves over his hands.

  Landon held the bag while Tanner went off, punching at the heavy bag, pretending it was Vic’s face and body he pummeled, as he worked his hands and unleashed his anger and frustration on the inanimate object. The son of a bitch had changed his life forever, destroyed his dream of showing his bastard father he was better than the man believed.

  College? Gone because he’d gone off on another member of the fraternity and gotten himself thrown out in the wake of Levi’s death. Levi, full of life and fun, his entire future ahead of him … dead. Running from the demons in his head, he’d ended up in jail after a bar fight gone bad. Tanner knew he had himself to blame for the wrong turns he’d taken. But Victor was the devil inside him he needed to exorcise.

  Hit after hit, sweat poured down his face and onto the floor until he was heaving and finally needed a break. He stopped, leaning down, hands braced on his thighs as he caught his breath.

  Landon collapsed onto the bench beside him, also breathing hard from handling the bag while Tanner went off.

  The ring of his cell phone sounded and he grabbed it from the bag on the floor. Scarlett’s name flashed on the screen.

  Stomach twisting, he answered. “Yeah.” He was still finding it hard to pull in air.

  “Tanner? We need to talk.” Her soft voice penetrated the haze around him left over from his workout.

  He inhaled deeply. “We do. I’m at the gym. I can shower and meet you somewhere,” he said, not wanting an audience at her office for the things he needed to tell her.

  “Let’s go to my place. Noon?” she asked, sounding both tired and serious.

  He hadn’t thought to ask how she’d come to the club last night but he assumed she’d heard it on the scanner at her office or the news. “I’ll pick up something to eat and meet you there,” he said and disconnected the call.

  “You okay?” Landon turned his head toward him.

  “Fuck no. I’ve got to tell the one woman who’s ever caught my attention that I fucked up my life and got a pass. She, on the other hand, puts guys like me away.” He hung his head, pissed at the turn things had taken.

  “I think you’re being too hard on yourself and not giving her enough credit. But time will tell. In the meantime, let’s hit the showers. You can’t go anywhere smelling like this.”

  “Fuck you,” he said with a grin. He really didn’t know what he’d do without the guys in his life. They were his family. The people he’d live and die for.

  Landon chuckled and they headed for the locker room, where he cleaned his body while he hoped Scarlett accepted his soul.

  * * *

  Scarlett had tossed and turned all last night, unable to sleep after the adrenaline rush of first the bomb scare, then Frank’s warning about Tanner, and the scary guy who’d seemed to threaten her before disappearing into the dark night. She didn’t take the man all that seriously. Plenty of sick people wandered the streets of Manhattan, and she doubted his throat-slashing gesture had been aimed at her. Still, she’d double-checked her locks and had a difficult time falling asleep.

  She’d spent the morning going over new evidence with Kyle for the trial that was starting next month, but she’d been unable to put what she’d learned about Tanner out of her mind. She needed to hear his story from him. Draw her own conclusions, make her own judgments.

  So she’d called him to meet and now she was heading home for the afternoon.

  “For someone who’s busy at work, I sure as hell have taken a lot of time off lately,” Scarlett muttered, packing up files so she could work after Tanner left. But she was keeping up with her caseload and her boss had no reason to complain. He didn’t care where she did her prep as long as it got done.

>   Once arriving at her apartment, she placed her folders on the edge of the table and changed into comfortable clothes, knowing she’d need the time to pull herself together before seeing Tanner. She had a feeling she’d be listening to an emotional explanation that would need her to merge her conscience and her feelings for him. It wouldn’t be easy.

  When he still hadn’t shown up by the time she headed back into her living room, she sat down to work, going through some depositions she’d taken and intended to use for trial.

  By the time the doorbell rang, she’d been deep in thought, and the sound startled her. She blew out a deep breath and walked over, opening the door to let Tanner in. “Hi.”

  She couldn’t help but look him over appreciatively, her gaze going from his messily styled hair to the scruff of beard she found so attractive, to the way he filled out his jeans and long-sleeve light blue top, bringing out the color in his eyes.

  “Hey.” He shoved his hands into his front pockets. “I’m here, ready to talk.”

  She swallowed hard and nodded. “Good. Come on in.”

  He stepped in and she shut the door behind him, then led him to the family room. All she could think of was the last time he’d been here and they went straight to the bedroom. No awkwardness between them at all.

  Now? Not so much.

  * * *

  Tanner followed Scarlett into the main room of her apartment, watching the sway of her sexy hips as she walked. She’d answered the door looking edible in a pair of black leggings and a cropped sweatshirt with the neck cut off and dipping down over one shoulder. He’d wanted nothing more than to pull her into his arms for a kiss, but he felt the distant vibes she was giving off and decided not to. At least not yet.

  It was anyone’s guess if he’d have that opportunity again after he told her everything. As much as he wanted to be here with Scarlett, he wasn’t looking forward to this heart-to-heart. Knowing he had no choice, he braced himself as she settled onto the couch and he took a seat beside her.

  “Everything okay after the bomb threat?” she asked.

  “Yes … and no.”

  She narrowed her gaze.

  “Look. I saw you with Frank Rhodes, so you obviously know things about me you want answers to.” He hadn’t meant to sound so defensive but he couldn’t control the bite to his words. He curled his hands into fists beside him, then realized and released his grip and forced air into his lungs. He needed to relax and just deal with it.

  She nodded. “He mentioned a few things about you and your past, but honestly, I don’t put stock into what someone else tells me. I want to hear about you from you.”

  “What if what Frank told you was true?” Even if the asshole had embellished, Tanner didn’t see how the man could make his past sound any worse than it actually had been.

  She glanced across the room at the picture of her brother, then clearly forced her gaze back to his. “Why don’t you just talk to me and we’ll go from there?”

  Unable to sit still, he rose and paced the room. “I told you about Levi.”

  Sadness filled her expression. “Yes.”

  “Well … even before Levi died, I had issues. Anger issues. I suppose you could say they stemmed from my father, who was a complete asshole. I couldn’t react to his verbal abuse the way I really wanted to, so I internalized my feelings. That caused me to act out. You could say despite being a smart guy academically, I was a troublemaker.” He smiled ruefully and she laughed.

  “I’m sorry about your dad, I think I told you that once before, but that sounds pretty self-aware.”

  “Therapy.”

  She raised an eyebrow. “An enlightened man. I’m impressed.”

  He frowned and said, “Don’t be. It was a prerequisite to my partners helping me out of a bind.” If he could call a potential prison sentence a bind.

  She pulled her bottom lip between her teeth and he wished it was his mouth biting those luscious lips. “I think you need to explain from the beginning,” she said.

  He blew out a breath, walked to the window, and looked out at the building next door. “After Levi died, the older guys involved were expelled from school and some were arrested, made deals, or went to trial and ended up in jail. But some stayed around town, it was Manhattan after all, and I ran into Vic. He was out on bail. We got into it. I beat him up on campus and got myself thrown out too.”

  Tanner cleared his throat but he didn’t turn around to face her, and she remained silent, as if sensing he needed to gather his thoughts because there was more to tell.

  “I spiraled after that.” It was as if he was determined to prove his father right, that he wasn’t going to make anything of himself. “I was at a bar. I’m not going to make excuses and say that I was defending someone’s honor … I was looking for a fight and I got one. I also got myself arrested for assaulting one of the patrons.”

  “What happened?” Scarlett asked. “Because obviously you wouldn’t be able to own a club or be given a liquor license if you had a felony on your record.”

  He ignored the edge of judgment in her tone. “Jason reached out to his cousin Gabriel Dare. Gabe has friends in high places. Essentially he got me an executive pardon. And I promised my friends, men I consider brothers, that I’d get help in order to control my anger. I did community service to put my head in the right space, I saw a therapist who taught me how to channel my anger – boxing, breathing exercises, things like that. And I promised them they’d never have an issue with me again.”

  “It was that easy? A promise, some therapy, and you didn’t pay for your crime?”

  He spun around, pissed at her callously thrown out words. “I paid every damn day. I’m still paying. But before you judge me, know this. I’m betting the difference between me and the guys who killed your brother is that I have remorse.”

  Awareness and regret flashed in her eyes. She’d lashed out at him because of her own pain. Which meant this was his chance to get through to her. To let her see the real man inside him.

  He strode up to her and met her gaze. “I regret beating the shit out of Vic…” If only because it hurt the guys in the end too. “And I regret going after the asshole in the bar. I hate this angry part of me that I work to keep under control. But other than the man at the bar who had the misfortune to piss me off at the lowest point of my life, the only people I’ve ever touched are those who hurt people I care about. Me, my sister, the men I consider brothers.” He held up a hand before she could misinterpret his words. “That’s not an excuse. It’s wrong. And I work every day to make it right.”

  She exhaled a long breath. “I see.”

  “Do you? Or do you look at me and see someone who’s no better than the guys who walked on a technicality after your brother died? Do you judge me for my past?”

  Time ticked by as he waited for her to answer. Time that felt like an eternity but was only a few seconds. Time that let him stare at her pale but beautiful features and realize he was more addicted to this woman than he’d wanted to admit.

  “I–” She paused, then drew a deep breath. “I can’t say I’m happy with what you told me. And accepting it makes me feel like a hypocrite after promising my brother, at his gravesite, I’d put criminals behind bars and make people pay for their crimes. How you acted, how you worked the system, despite it being legal, goes against everything I believe in.”

  He stiffened his shoulders, prepared for her to throw him out.

  She reached out and cupped his face in her hand. “But I’ve also gotten to know you. The man standing in front of me now, and I know you’re a decent man.” She shook her head. “I have to work through this in my head. But I can’t just walk away from you either.”

  “Thank fuck.” He stepped forward and pulled her into his arms.

  When she tipped her head, he took the hint and covered her mouth with his. He kissed her with all the relief he felt and the desire that never failed to consume him when she was around. He didn’t kid himself that the
y’d turned a corner. He knew he had more to prove. But she hadn’t gone running. And that was enough for now.

  * * *

  Scarlett’s head was spinning and not because of that kiss, but she had to admit she liked being in Tanner’s arms. Although she’d already had an inkling of his history from Frank, getting confirmation from him that he’d been arrested for assault and gotten off easily hurt. Then again so did hearing about the fact that he’d been so bullied by his own father as a child, he’d channeled his aggression internally until he’d acted out. No parent should treat a child that way.

  A nightclub owner with a shady past, he was the antithesis of the goals she’d set out for her life. Yet he was everything she wanted. And Scarlett didn’t deal well with contradictions, something she sensed Tanner understood because after that kiss, he’d taken a step back. And was studying her like he expected her to change her mind at any moment.

  “I need you to do me a favor,” Tanner said.

  That was a surprising request. “Okay. What is it?”

  “Can you find out how someone got out of prison earlier than they should have?”

  She nodded. “Who?”

  “Victor Clark.”

  She blinked in shock. “You mean the same Victor who killed Levi?”

  He groaned. “Yeah. I saw him outside last night after the bomb threat evacuation.”

  She cocked her head to the side. “How’d you react?”

  A reluctant frown pulled at his sexy lips. “Instinct took over. I started to go after him.” He paused. “But Landon put a hand on my shoulder. His touch brought me back to the present. The truth is the guys dragged me out of the alley and away from temptation.”

  She knew how difficult it must be for him to admit the truth to her when he was trying to convince her he’d changed.

  “At least you’re honest.” He could have said it had been no problem seeing Victor again.

  “I don’t see the point in lying to you. You’d figure out who I really am soon enough.” Despite the seriousness of their conversation, he winked and her girlie parts stood up and took notice.